Over the years many an artist, in rock ‘n’ roll especially, have used shock tactics or elaborate theatrics to help get themselves noticed. It’s all part of the image; the horror and excess that (Music aside) helps separate rock and metal from other genres. Many have succeeded throughout history…ALICE COOPER arguably helped start it all with his stage production going WAY back, you have the likes of ROB ZOMBIE bridging media formats by branching out into some intensely brutal horror movies…though today however we’re focusing not so much on artistic theatre, but, more of a macabre pantomime…yes we’re going to be looking at LORDI. Now instantly recognisable, their whole gimmick is based around the demonic monster costumes designed by front man Mr Lordi (Real name Tomi Petteri Putaansuu) but, despite being around for some time now, it wasn’t until that fateful and unforgettable night where they WON the Eurovision Song Contest for Finland back in 2006.
As unreal as that sounds, “Hard Rock Hallelujah” catapulted them into a mainstream audience, and their tongue-in-cheek style or horror metal has won them over a legion of fans, and they now have an impressive back catalogue of albums. Earlier this year they released their ninth; the wonderfully titled “Sexorcism”, supposedly their most controversial release to date…somebody better call Father Merrin, I think Jesus has done WAY more than fuck this lot…
We begin with the title track and it does open up like a cut from a horror movie score; really dramatic sounding and in preparation for a jump scare or intense fight between good and evil. The simple but ominous piano soon gives way though to some decent riffs and a surging hard-rock aesthetic and musically this is fine; it’s got a decent melodic hook for a chorus too which, given, Mr Lordi’s honestly awful gravelled vocals, is quite impressive….it’s been produced really well up in Finnvox. This is far from a regular exorcism however (Is there even such a thing?) as he sings of FINGERING the demon out of her…steady on guys this isn’t the 19th century, you can’t be palming shit like this off like hysteria…did she even consent? This gimmick is backed up later by the interlude “Scg9: The Documented Phenomenon”, which essentially parodies THAT Exorcist scene with only slightly re-arranged verbiage. I really don’t know if this is a tribute or a parody…
The ridiculousness doesn’t stop there however as thematically following on from the title track we’re gifted with “The Beast Is Yet To Cum”...a nice play on words there Sir but if anything you’re promoting the fact that your own fingering skills are sub-par at best. Y’all motherfuckers need STEEL PANTHER and that’s one thing I thought I’d never say! In terms of musical highlights, it’s actually quite hard to separate any of the 13 tracks offered this time around. “Naked In My Cellar” has some more catchy synth elements and initially opens up like an early NIGHTWISH number before it delves into this rumbling, bass-heavy riff, and it’s about as clean as Mr Lordi’s vocals can probably get? It’s got a great pop chorus really…”Polterchrist” is another amusingly named track which starts off with some chilling female choir-esque vocals and more piano, before descending into a chugging, classic-metal type affair.
We eventually close out with “Sodomesticated Animal” which aside from its admittedly good name and a decent solo doesn’t inspire a great deal, while “Haunting Season” rounds things up with a generic symphonic metal effort. The trouble with this album is, everything seems to last forever, all of the songs, despite their comedic quirks, sadly drag a little and overstay their welcome to a degree. Less Lordi, more of a thick load quite frankly…a good release for Lordi perhaps like but, not something you want in your ears…the power of Christ compels you to NOT listen to this album. [4]
As unreal as that sounds, “Hard Rock Hallelujah” catapulted them into a mainstream audience, and their tongue-in-cheek style or horror metal has won them over a legion of fans, and they now have an impressive back catalogue of albums. Earlier this year they released their ninth; the wonderfully titled “Sexorcism”, supposedly their most controversial release to date…somebody better call Father Merrin, I think Jesus has done WAY more than fuck this lot…
We begin with the title track and it does open up like a cut from a horror movie score; really dramatic sounding and in preparation for a jump scare or intense fight between good and evil. The simple but ominous piano soon gives way though to some decent riffs and a surging hard-rock aesthetic and musically this is fine; it’s got a decent melodic hook for a chorus too which, given, Mr Lordi’s honestly awful gravelled vocals, is quite impressive….it’s been produced really well up in Finnvox. This is far from a regular exorcism however (Is there even such a thing?) as he sings of FINGERING the demon out of her…steady on guys this isn’t the 19th century, you can’t be palming shit like this off like hysteria…did she even consent? This gimmick is backed up later by the interlude “Scg9: The Documented Phenomenon”, which essentially parodies THAT Exorcist scene with only slightly re-arranged verbiage. I really don’t know if this is a tribute or a parody…
The ridiculousness doesn’t stop there however as thematically following on from the title track we’re gifted with “The Beast Is Yet To Cum”...a nice play on words there Sir but if anything you’re promoting the fact that your own fingering skills are sub-par at best. Y’all motherfuckers need STEEL PANTHER and that’s one thing I thought I’d never say! In terms of musical highlights, it’s actually quite hard to separate any of the 13 tracks offered this time around. “Naked In My Cellar” has some more catchy synth elements and initially opens up like an early NIGHTWISH number before it delves into this rumbling, bass-heavy riff, and it’s about as clean as Mr Lordi’s vocals can probably get? It’s got a great pop chorus really…”Polterchrist” is another amusingly named track which starts off with some chilling female choir-esque vocals and more piano, before descending into a chugging, classic-metal type affair.
We eventually close out with “Sodomesticated Animal” which aside from its admittedly good name and a decent solo doesn’t inspire a great deal, while “Haunting Season” rounds things up with a generic symphonic metal effort. The trouble with this album is, everything seems to last forever, all of the songs, despite their comedic quirks, sadly drag a little and overstay their welcome to a degree. Less Lordi, more of a thick load quite frankly…a good release for Lordi perhaps like but, not something you want in your ears…the power of Christ compels you to NOT listen to this album. [4]
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