The “Road To Merthyr” kicked off in The Red House, Merthyr Tydfil on Saturday, August 2nd, to officially start the countdown to MERTHYR ROCK 2014. For the next couple of weeks, a variety of bands will play a host of venues in the build up to the returning South Wales festival, and what better way to get things under way than an intimate gig with one of Wales finest exports; KIDS IN GLASS HOUSES. I caught up with SHAY and IAIN for a quick chat before they went on stage.

GAV: Thank you both for stopping to talk…

SHAY: That’s quite alright

GAV: Right, you’re playing Merthyr Town Hall tonight, the first of four intimate dates which officially kick starts the road to Merthyr, which is for Merthyr Rock festival, tell us how all of this came to be and how you got involved in the whole thing..

SHAY: Well basically, our farewell tour, the Cardiff date of that tour sold out quite fast. We were thinking of adding an extra date for anyone who missed out, but we didn’t really want to like, y’know, we thought against doing that because we wanted to keep that Cardiff date special, and unique, so the promoters approached us and asked if we wanted to do a run of shows, and, we’re not here to do the actual festival itself, so y’know, there are people now who couldn’t get Cardiff tickets who get a chance to see us for one last time.

GAV: Regarding Merthyr Rock, the last time it was put on was two years ago, you headlined the Sunday…

SHAY: Yeah that was class!

GAV: …with the “Road To Merthyr” this year, the whole concept is based around building up momentum for the festival itself, it’s supporting a lot of up and coming bands and local venues, how does it feel to be a part of it all?

IAIN: It’s good yeah, y’know we've always prided ourselves on being part of the community, the music community of Wales, and y’know we've taken bands from Wales out on our tours to try and help them out, and we've always got a keen eye to see what’s going on, so yeah it’s a shame like, we are gutted to not be a part OF Merthyr Rock this year, but, y’know these things happen, but it’s nice to be involved in some way, and like you said, supporting local venues at the moment, it’s really good…

GAV: There are venues that are struggling at the moment, it’s a shame really…

IAIN: It’s really sad to see, but I guess It’s just the nature of the way things move I guess, hopefully a lot of venues will survive and when things start moving up again it’ll all be fine

GAV: With supporting music in mind, South Wales in particular churns out a lot of great talent, what are your thoughts on the current scene now and the current crop of up and coming bands?

SHAY: It’s looking pretty good, really healthy, it’s always been extremely strong, like, when we were coming through we had LOSTPROPHETS breaking, we had FUNERAL FOR A FRIEND, then we had BULLET FOR MY VALENTINE, it’s always nice to have bands that you can aspire to that are from around here that get to that point we’re they’re successful, and it gives you a lot of confidence that you can go out there and do it yourself y’know?

IAIN: It’s good as well because at the moment, y’know, I think when we were coming through there seemed to be a niche of bands that were coming through but at the moment there’s a lot more variety and there are a lot more genres and styles that people are breaking into, which is awesome to see people not just trying to do the same as each other

GAV: There’s an eclectic choice of styles, people aren't afraid to experiment…

IAIN: Yeah it’s good to see like, especially seeing not just rock music, there’s dance acts breaking out too and stuff and it’s good to see

GAV: On the subject of up and coming talent, next week in the same venue you’re playing tonight, there's the Battle Of The Bands, which is great to see not only the Youth Promotion Network but the venues too allowing these bands opportunities to play festivals like Merthyr Rock, have you had chance to check out any of the bands lined up?

IAIN: I haven’t myself no…

SHAY: I've seen the flyer, I'm familiar with a couple of them…

GAV: I know CLEAR THE AUDITORIUM are playing, I've seen them before, great live band

SHAY: I've never seen them live, I’d like to see them live, but uh, yeah it’s brilliant. It’s exciting to see these young bands get given the chance to play these venues and get given the chance to play a festival such as Merthyr Rock

GAV: It’s encouragement at the end of the day and it’s very promising, with regards to new bands, you mentioned Lostprophets earlier, I wasn't going to mention anything to do with them but as we've brought them up, what do you make of the whole thing? I know the guys recently started up NO DEVOTION…

IAIN: I'm not going to say anything about that…

SHAY: No Devotion are great

IAIN: It’s awesome to see that they can pick themselves up and do that, y’know they were fucking incredible in Cardiff the other day, it’s good to see friends doing well

SHAY: They've written some really good songs and, it’s only a matter of time now before they get to where they were I think…

 GAV: With No Devotion coming out after the breakup of Lostprophets, you mentioned earlier on your own farewell tour, it’s always sad to see bands call it a day and split up, for whatever reasons, what reasons did you have to call time on Kids In Glass Houses?

SHAY: We’re sick of each other! [laughs] No it just feels like, the right time for us, we've had a good run, it’s been fun, the best part of a decade, we just think we've done all we can as a band. I don’t think bands should last forever, y’know, we were never going to be doing this in our 50’s

GAV: You’re not the ROLLING STONES then? [laughs]

SHAY: We've had a hell of a good run, had some great times…been around the world a couple of times, we just feel like, we don’t’ have another album in us…I think we’ll  just call it time there and have an excellent last tour while we’re all still friends

IAIN: We’d rather go out on a high rather than getting it to a point where we do actually end up hating each other and you get remembered for the wrong things…we've written four class albums, we just want to go out on a high y’know?

GAV: With the farewell tour in mind, a lot of dates are sold out already, the fan base is still there, they’re prepared to support you

SHAY: Yeah it’s been incredible, we've been blown away with the response to that tour, shows have sold out like you said, or shows have been upgraded, it’s a long tour as well, it’s like 25 dates or something, it’s the biggest tour we've ever done, it’s going to be a hell of a way to finish the band.

GAV: Even though it’s a sad note, people are there all the way with you..,

IAIN: Exactly, that’s the other reason, we didn't want it to be like, it ends because it HAS to end, it can’t go on y’know, it’s more like, it’s our decision, we’re in control of it, the fact that’s true means that we can enjoy it with the people coming to watch us, rather than them coming to watch something that’s forced or fake, you know what I mean?

SHAY: It’s definitely the best thing we've ever done, it has to be in a way…

GAV: Will these four intimate shows be a sort of testing ground for what set list you’re going to put together for the tour?

IAIN: We’re doing a few songs that we haven’t played for a while to see how people feel about them, but I think with these shows it’s gonna' be cool to have a bit more fun with the set list, do some songs we wouldn't normally play at bigger shows, and some fan favourites y’know. Music is subjective anyway, y’know there’s no, “perfect set”, we try and do our best to incorporate older stuff with newer stuff…I guess we try and please ourselves more than anything…

GAV: Yeah that’s true as, at the end of the day you've got to enjoy what you’re playing on stage, it’s no good just going through the motions and being predictable…with songs in mind, are there any plans for a greatest hits or maybe a swan song single to accompany this farewell tour?

SHAY: Noooo…

IAIN: We've toyed with both ideas and we've shot them both down really, I think like, we did say after this album we’d see how we felt and if we didn't want to continue we’d just knock it on the head, so, to do something else we’d be cheating ourselves a little bit, it kind of cheapens the way In which we’re trying to go out

SHAY: You've got to try and draw a line in the sand haven’t you, just, call it a day. When that final show in Cardiff happens, that is it, you can’t be like, 2 weeks later saying “oh we’re playing Clwb Ifor Bach” or “We’re supporting these guys on tour…”.

GAV: That’s respectable, it’s cool…on a final note, before I go, back to Merthyr Rock, obviously you’re not playing this year, but will any of you be there and what are your recommendations for the day?

SHAY: We’re actually in Japan…

GAV: LITTLE bit more fancy than Cyfarthfa Park! [laughs]

SHAY: Yeah we’re playing in Japan, trip down to Australia, that’s why we can’t play this year but there’s some great bands playing, obviously THE BLACKOUT, home town show, let me think…

GAV: We have…ANTI-FLAG, TAKING BACK SUNDAY, BLITZ KIDS…

SHAY: There’s a band called EN GARDE, they are pretty good, friends of mine…

IAIN: You’re IN the band! [laughs]

SHAY: But I'm not playing! They’ll be better without me as well [laughs] It’s just going to be a great event.

GAV: Well guys, thanks for chatting, and good luck with the shows and the tour.

Tickets for Merthyr Rock 2014 are on sale now: http://www.seetickets.com/event/merthyr-rock-2014/cyfarthfa-castle/785622

Tickets for Kids In Glass Houses are subject to availability: http://www.ents24.com/uk/tour-dates/kids-in-glass-houses

Continuing my chat with the Bam and the guys from FUCKFACE UNSTOPPABLE, here we talk about the album, collaborations…and Jackass 4….

GAV: So yeah, I was going to ask, obviously with this being the 2nd UK tour. Since last time round, you’ve released the debut FFU album, recorded mainly in Reykjavik, how have you found the response to the album regarding your own songs and the covers? How has the whole thing gone down?

BAM: I’m stoked on it, I read your review, and I Liked it…

GAV: Thank you very much

BAM: …and I read one other one, and that’s pretty much it [laughs] I don’t have a phone here, and going on line is such a pain In the ass, for me, that like, I check it once every ten days, and there’s hardly any time to look at YOUTUBE clips or anything…

NOVAK: I talk to a lot of fans at the shows and I ask them like, “Honestly, what do you think?” I mean, if you think it sucked, tell me it sucked, I really want to know the truth, and they’re like, honestly they came here expecting to see some Jackass shit on stage, Bam just being a fucking idiot, and you can see they wanted to be an ass-hole about it, but like, they really can’t be, it’s like there’s really a method to this madness and they seem to respect it, unless they are lying to my face…[laughs]

GAV: Regarding the whole Jackass thing and the live show, obviously you still get the odd fan expecting to see stunts or that sort of thing, in the UK there a lot of health and safety issues, like, you can’t crowd surf, you can’t do the wall of death, there’s a lot of safety implications regarding UK shows, have you found that a problem on tour?

BAM: Yeah it’s been a problem, we had like, a letter written from one of the Academy’s, and they go “Rubbish Heap is the most terrible example of a person…” [laughs] He tried to French kiss the pit security, he was pissing ON stage, he uh, was diving off of the roof of the tour bus into the crowd…

NICKI: He was forcefully trying to kiss EVERYBODY in the crowd…

NOVAK: He seemed receptive to criticism early in the evening but later on there was NO use talking to him [laughs]

BAM: It was a letter that deserved to be framed

ALEX: He was this, massive security guy, and there was this huge gap between the stage and the crowd, between the barrier right? I was jumping over it, back and forth the whole show, and then this guy was like, trying to pull me aside to tell me I can’t do that, and he finally grabs me, this huge guy, massive dude, shaved head…

GAV: They normally tend to pick the big steroid abusers or, that kind of guy

ALEX: He’s yelling at me, you can’t do this, you can’t dive of that…and I'm like “ok, ok, ok” and then I just grabbed his big fat meat-head head and fucking make out with him, and he threw me like ten feet…

BAM: But why did you call him a faggot? You’re the faggot now aren’t you? [laughs]

GAV: That probably didn't help [laughs]

ALEX: So if you call somebody a faggot, and then YOU French kiss em’? Then fuck you…

BAM: I really like controversy, and, if you say the word faggot and a gay person is offended, but then YOU are the one to French kiss the guy…controversy, irony, I like it all [laughs]

GAV: But yeah, coming back to the album, obviously it’s a great album, as you mentioned earlier I reviewed it, I enjoyed it, obviously being yourself, you've managed to get a lot of guest vocals on board, including Dani from CRADLE OF FILTH etc., how do you feel working with these guys in established bands?

BAM: I flew out Dani to Iceland for my wedding, uh, and we were already in the studio and we decided to do “Sleepless” because I really like than song from ANETHEMA, and I know that he covered that a while back, so I knew he already knew the words, and uh, we just did it kinda for fun but it turned out really, really good, and then he liked it so much, that I did a track for him, “Beds Are Burning”…I sung that for him for his album , it’s called “Devilment”

GAV: When you get together to write music, do you pre-consider guest vocals?

BAM: Well with that one, we were just covering an Anethema song so…it just went like, we picked that one and we just did it

GAV: Obviously the album has been out now, officially, a good couple of months, is it too early right now to talk about a 2nd album? Or are you just enjoying what you’re doing with the 1st one right now?

BAM: Well, we have some ideas for some new stuff but I'm just enjoying this, touring, basically like, I'm living in a house that’s moving, with all my best friends…and we get paid to do that? That’s the greatest thing that anything can wish for…the only thing that’s tough is boning her out! [Points at Nicky] [laughs]

GAV: Put it bluntly why don’t you? [laughs]

ALEX: We have a band with some of the best musicians that I've ever worked with in my life and when it comes to writing music it comes quickly, so yes, the answer is yes, there is new music coming…

BAM: The thing is, is that, there’s so much music that I listen to that no one has ever heard of, that, I just want to cover it and play it, I mean, Is it a cover? Yes…have you ever heard it? No.

GAV: It’s, technically original in that sense…

BAM: Yeah like, I want to play a rockin’ ass song, I mean like a CLUTCH song or a TURBONEGRO song yeah I'm sure people have heard of it…

NICKI: Because of you…

BAM: Well not necessarily like in Europe, Turbonegro is really big anyway…

GAV: Ok then well with that in mind, are there any bands in particular right now that you’re really into that people otherwise may or may not know?

BAM: Well…THE TURBO AC’s has a really good song called “Substance” that I don’t think anybody has ever heard, that I would really like to do…and uh, if you like electronic kind of rock, like, this band called THE FAINT from Nebraska, they do a song called “Evil Voices” that I’d like to cover…but I mean like, if you’re a fan of that genre of music, then you’d know…if you’re a rock fan liking Clutch you've probably never heard of The Faint…so, it’s just bands like that…I don’t know if TURBO AC’s are big at all…but I really like the song…

NOVAK: You've kind of done that your whole life anyway, y’know you put these bands out with CKY back in the day, and VIVA LA BAM that no one has heard about, which pushed you forward, and it brings more of an audience…

GAV: It’s like the two compilation CD’s you released, it’s promoting bands basically, you've done a lot for that, and it’s cool…I was going to ask as well, going back to guest vocals, people cannot deny the fact you have a massive link with the band HIM…is there any potential collaboration at all in the future? Have you talked to Ville?

BAM: I saw them at SONISPHERE yeah…but, I don’t know if FFU is necessarily, like, y’know HIM is like a band that I really like, and they do what they do well, but, If FFU was going to sing “Join Me In Death” I don’t think it’s going to go over very well [laughs]…y’know, I can’t sing “Bury Me Deep Inside Your Heart” after singing about bending my dick around the back of my ass [laughs]

GAV: You could probably remix or tweak a song, throw in some innuendo or something [laughs] no disrespect to Ville or anything like that…

BAM: It’s probably slim to none…but you never know….we might find a song we can both agree upon [laughs] y’know cos I sing about bending dicks and fucking yourself, and he sings about love…[laughs]

ALEX: Have you ever tried bending your dick around the back of your arse and fucking yourself Sir?

GAV: Um…I really, couldn't [laughs]

BAM: Well if it’s a rock or a hard on it’s not gonna work, it needs to be a soft on, but, apparently on the inter-web, somebody’s done it…

ALEX: Novak and I last night had a jack-off competition…

GAV: Who won?

BAM: Novak won…

GAV: Congratulations [laughs]

NOVAK: Thanks bud! [laughs]

GAV: What were the terms of the game?

BAM: Whoever could cum first got $100…

NOVAK: See, me doing a year in prison helped me deal with that whole thing

ALEX: I was so nervous; my dick just looked like, a squashed flamingo…

BAM: A squashed flamingo? [laughs]

ALEX: Mine is weird because I have a foreskin anyway…yours probably does too because you’re European, do you have a foreskin?

GAV: Yeah I have foreskin…

ALEX: High five! Foreskin buddies! [laughs]

GAV: [laughs] High five! But yes…just to quickly wrap things up…one or two things I want to briefly mention; BAMS BAD ASS GAMESHOW…talk us through how that came to be…

BAM: We uh, wanted to see if random everyday people could go through JACKASS like stunts to see if they could win $10,000…and uh, y’know it was fun doing it but it was with a major network that had a lot of safety issues, like they needed to be fully padded with wrist guards and helmets and shit…so uh, but when a soccer mom is doing it it’s funnier than if it was a tough and buff dude willing to get hurt. But uh, it was a fun thing, and uh, I knocked Novak’s teeth out one time [laughs]

GAV: That was in the uh, phone booth segment yeah?

BAM: They didn't know the gnarliness of it though…like, he was bloody as hell, he was complaining for twenty minutes, and they didn't show any of that…

NOVAK: They wanted Jackass stunts, which are rated R…but wanted it rated PG…or whatever is lower than PG…so they just tamed it down a lot, so it was hard to work with.

BAM: When I knocked out Novak’s tooth and it was all bloody, the camera guys, they were like “Oh my god cut cameras this is serious”…I'm like “Cut cameras? You’re getting gold!” You know they just didn't understand how we work y’know?

GAV: I would happily be on that show, I wouldn't even care about the prize money I’d just love to do all that stuff [laughs], but, to wrap things up, having mentioned the stunts…there have been rumours on line, some images floating around regarding a potential Jackass 4…can you elaborate on that?

BAM: Well, we've been discussing it, but Knoxville’s been busy with other movies, like, I alone have enough idea’s to do a whole movie, y’know I have like a book full of Jackass ideas, but, nothing is confirmed at the moment…

GAV: I was just asking really as, with Knoxville having released BAD GRAMPA last year, it did really well and it was dedicated to Ryan, which was a lovely touch…I was just wondering if the whole consensus was, that all of you guys be willing and prepared to do a fourth film together?

BAM: Yeah, we are, and, if it DOES happen, we’ll call it “We’re Not Dunn Yet”…get it? [laughs] 


- END -

The album "FuckFace Unstoppable" is available now for £5.99: https://itunes.apple.com/gb/album/ffu/id865763097

Wednesday, July 9th, Bam Margera’s FUCKFACE UNSTOPPABLE rolled into Cardiff to play THE GLOBE as part of their current UK tour, luckily I was able to hop aboard the tour bus and chat with Bam, alongside his wife Nicki, Brandon Novak and Alex Flamsteed before the show, where they answered some questions and talked about all sorts of crazy shit…

GAV: I'm with Bam here, alongside Nicki, Novak and Flamsteed from Fuckface Unstoppable…


BAM: Alex Flamsteed, aka Rubbish Heap

ALEX: I'm known as Rubbish Heap in this band for a good reason.

BAM: He got off with some girl the other night, and in the heat of the moment, she punched him in the face, and his tooth got knocked out.

ALEX: I got a sexual injury!

BAM: Yeah, but she told you to soak it in milk!

ALEX: I didn't soak it in milk, I threw her fucking arse out of the bus and told her “fuck you, you cost me $2000 dollars on my teeth!”

BAM: They left on bad terms…

GAV: That’s understandable! [laughs] But, yes, basically you’re in the UK again now for the 2nd tour, and obviously your fans know what FFU is all about, but for those generic rock and metal fans that aren't familiar with FFU, how would you describe what this is?

BAM: Let’s say if uh, CLUTCH fucked TURBONEGRO and had a kid it’d be us [laughs], and then a little bit of GG ALLIN coz Novak sings naked, Nicki B is half naked, Rubbish Heap dives in the crowd left and right that’s why he has bruises all over his back…he looks like a leopard.

ALEX: I look like a leopard…I have leopard print bruises! [laughs]

BAM: I got a fucking elbow pussy! [shows deep cut on his elbow]

GAV: Nice…how the fuck did that happen?

BAM: Me and him were fighting out front and then I got cut on some glass

ALEX: I like, smashed a bottle in fake anger…

GAV: Fake anger? [laughs]

ALEX: Well, we got a camera that goes out the front of the tour bus…

BAM: Yeah and, it’s always recording so, we wanted to just get footage, so we started a fight outside…

GAV: As you do [laughs]

ALEX: But I’d smashed a bottle, and I went to tackle Bam and then, well like, I’d had a couple of beers to be truthful, and I went to tackle Bam and like, I tackled him right onto where I’d smashed the bottle, and, he landed on his elbow, and I feel really bad about it

BAM: You should! But, I popped your ear drum out! I slapped him when he was sleeping once and I popped his ear drum out and I felt really bad about it because he’s a drummer and he should be able to hear…

ALEX: It’s all fun and games!

GAV: All fun and games indeed, but, you’re here In the UK now, you've worked a few dates around the fact you’re playing SONISPHERE this year, well, you played Sonisphere sorry. Obviously you've toured the UK, the US, Canada, etc.. How did Sonisphere compare to the fact you've played club gigs and local venues, size-wise, how did that feel?

BAM: All the shows have been really good and uh, y’know, Sonisphere was rad, but, I like the tight clubs with no barriers, the fans are right there, and the security y’know, is like, “If a fan jumps up on stage you want me to like, rough em up and throw em out?" Hell no! Leave em up there! Let em do whatever they want. “But what if they trip on the guitar wire?” Then they trip on the guitar wire!

ALEX: I like playing big festivals but like, when the first person in the crowd is like 15 feet away from you, because there’s this huge stage and this huge barrier, it’s like, it’s fucking awesome, y’know don’t get me wrong, I absolute love playing outdoor shows and festivals, but, when there’s no barrier and they are right up in your face it’s so much more intimate and fun and the crowd has so much more fun that way, there’s pros and cons to both so…

GAV: There’s more connection with the crowd that way because obviously, you pour your heart and soul into the live show, and then, you appreciate the feedback from the fans...

ALEX: Well they’re just as much of a part of the show as the show

BAM: I think they’re more of a part of it though when they’re right up front, coz, y’know, you’re slapping hands, diving into the crowd, stuff like that.

ALEX: And like we, we like to have everyone that’s in the crowd, be part of the show, rather than like, we’re not just gonna stand there and perform to them, we are part of their show, and they are part of our show, and that’s the whole thing, but at the same time, playing to 15,000 is absolutely fucking awesome too y’know? It’s the greatest feeling in the world, but also playing to couple of hundred people in a packed out little club, and I can fucking, French kiss people, and Novak’s balls are hanging in people’s faces, that’s hilarious.

BAM: Thank god Rubbish Heap played with GUTTERMOUTH, like he knows about rock shows, that if it’s a Monday night and nobody shows up, like, one time we were in Detroit, and it was a venue with 2000 capacity, and there was only 400 people there and it looked like no one was there, coz they were all spread out, it looked like there were fucking five people there to me and I'm like “Jess, I can’t do this, I am not playing this show, I’m just not”…and Rubbish Heap was like, “I know what to do, Every mother fucker right now get the fuck up on stage!” So now there’s, 400 people in this massive venue, and they’re all on stage and we’re wall to wall packed, elbow to elbow…

ALEX: We were crowd surfing ON stage

BAM: It wound up being one of the best shows BECAUSE of that, and I would never thought to do that, and he has like the gift of gab for doing that, like, just coz, if you’re Jess, y’know my brother, “Alright everybody should try to come up on stage coz it’d be like, way awesome…” y’know It just wouldn't be the same, it just wouldn't work [laughs]

ALEX: But y’know like, at the same time, when it comes to that, I'm extremely fortunate enough to have, Bam and I both doing front-man sort of stuff, it’s great because, it gives us both the ability to have awesome crowd interaction and awesome vocals at the same time. If I like, dive into the crowd and my microphone goes flying, cable breaks, it tends to happen every, probably five minutes, and then there’s Novak too y’know, it’s just a good mixture.

NOVAK: We’re good on stage but they don’t really expect much out of us ANY other time on the tour, they don’t expect us to load in or load out, or make it on time anywhere or be responsible, but we’re good on stage so that pays the dues [laughs]

GAV: I was there last year at Bristol, and, sadly you weren't there at the time…

ALEX: He was there…

GAV: No, Novak wasn't at Bristol

BAM: He was in the hospital with his blown out ass-hole. He blew out his ass-hole!

GAV: You BLEW OUT your ass-hole?

NOVAK: Yeah…

GAV: Can you explain HOW that even happened? [laughs]

BAM: He asked me for $30 in the worst neighbourhood ever, and he’s been a heroin addict for seven years…or more…and I knew that whatever he wanted my $30 for was for nothing good, so I was like, “I'm not gonna give you $30”, and he kept begging and begging, and I'm like, “Shove this rock up your ass and I’ll give you $30”, so he shoves this rock up his ass, and he forgets that its up there for like, two days…

ALEX: A jagged ass rock by the way!

BAM: Then, he dives in the crowd with a girl’s thong on, and, they rip the thong like a king wedgie, and rip the rock out, so, dude, he blew his ass out, and it looked like a uh, apricot was hanging out of his ass

NOVAK: Blood was shooting out of my ass hole and, they wanted to sew my ass hole shut, and, I was actually going through withdrawal at the time

ALEX: Of course you were! [laughs]

NOVAK: So, yeah, they kept giving me morphine, and I'm like, well “I have a really high tolerance so I need more morphine”, and they were like, “We've given you enough to kill an elephant at this point”…, and I'm like “Yeah but I'm a drug addict and I need more”…so I have a high tolerance, so after like the 6th shot, I said “Alright one more shot”…they asked me “If we give you one more shot will you stay through the night and have the operation in the morning?”  So I'm like “Yeah yeah I’ll stay through the night”, so, they give me the shot, and then I rip it out and I'm like, “Thanks for the fucking Gaids shot ass hole”,and then just walk out of the hospital…

BAM: [laughs] He rips the needle out of his own arm, like, the nurse is supposed to do it, he’s just like, “Ha! Gaids shot for the road!”

NOVAK: I really showed them because I still to this day shit out blood OR have a haemorrhoid, every fucking day, so I really showed them huh? [laughs]

ALEX: But the other thing is, his girlfriend Apple was there right…

BAM: The Doctor goes, “So YOU are his girlfriend?” And she’s like, “Yeah?”, and he’s like, “…And you don’t think that he’s gay?” She’s like, “Why?” He’s like “This is not from a thong ripped open, this is from years and years of damage to his anus…”, and Novak’s like, “Well I forgot to mention Doc, I used to shove drugs up there and hide it like a glove compartment” [laughs]

NOVAK: My ass hole was like a suitcase in times of need, you know what I'm saying?

ALEX: For nine years of Novak's life his arse hole was literally a safe

GAV: I can understand the logic behind it but I can’t relate personally [laughs]

ALEX: What you've never shoved drugs up your arse?

NOVAK: You haven’t fucking lived! [laughs]

ALEX: You gotta try that! I've never actually done that either…that’s a Novak thing…

...To Be Continued...