The following review that you’re about to read, came about purely by chance, as, the band and album in question were not even on my radar, let alone my infinite list of shit to listen to. No, today’s review can be credited to Nikki Smash, who I write content for over at RIFF YARD MEDIA. Courtesy of ONE EYED TOAD RECORDS, SaN PR forwarded Nikki the upcoming debut album from Hertfordshire based metal outfit RAZE, entitled “Pyrography”, scheduled for release on July 28th, and he himself gave it the review for the RYM website. (Check that out here). 

So, you may be wondering where I come into it? Nikki has a brilliant mind and is a very smart dude when it comes to the music industry, but review writing isn’t something he does a great deal of, and so he asked me for my opinion on his review, because he felt he may have been a bit too harsh, or, blunt? You’re probably thinking, then why the fuck did he ask me of all people? Good question, but I read it over, and it was a very well put together, professionally critical piece of reviewing, that had no issues with its content whatsoever.  

He was worrying about nothing essentially. I always say if you genuinely think something, commit it to pen, no point in watering down integrity. This is where I then said, casually, it could have been worse, I could have reviewed it! We laughed, then it dawned on me that, I have a blog of my own, which brings us to the here and now. So, with that being said; if Nikki thought HE was being harsh, well, someone hold my beer damnit. New question; will this Raze to the occasion and impress me, or is this pyro going to go up like the Grenfell Tower; a poorly planned tragedy? Let’s find out... 

We open with “Maple”, but don’t expect bacon and pancakes, this ain’t no breakfast of champions. We get a deep, brooding guitar led opening with light cymbal's littering the background, before a more surging dose of melodic metal sweeps through, and it’s promising. The clean vocals have a very delicate baritone, before Louis Dunham takes off with a soaring chorus section. The ALTER BRIDGE and TREMONTI influences plain to see, and it's going well...before the growling. As it happens, the band threw LAMB OF GOD down as an influence too, so naturally the best thing to do is combine everything, and squeal like a rabid pig over parts of a generally decent song, ruining the ever-loving fuck out of it. It doesn’t fit, it does neither the track or Louis any favours, and is delivered with about as much grace as a coat hanger abortion.  

Follow up track “Better Off Alone” starts off harnessing more of a core heavy metal style, channelling further influences like MACHINE HEAD, but it also has an air of PANTERA to it in places. The heavier, guttural vocals do feel more at home here, as the instrumentation is more befitting of such a brutal approach; it isn’t jarring in any way, and the cleaner notes compliment the growls much better here. An admittedly sluggish, plodding riff carries the bulk of the track, and the guitar solo is sadly lost in a barrage of audible throat cancer, while drummer Ethan Morter smashes his plates like a bull in a China shop. Way overlayered here and it’s another potential highlight spoiled. 

Next up we have their most recent single “Roachman”, and this could be considered an album highlight. When they focus on clean melody, and incorporate their Southern-tinged hard rock, they actually have something decent going, as individually it is clear they are all incredibly competent performers and musicians, all of the potential is there, but there seems to be this need for everyone to be in the limelight, and these tracks at some point or another feel clustered and congested. Again, guttural vocals not necessary here, bringing the track down, and this one simply feels like two different tracks trying to work at once. Oh, and we HAVE to mention the video. Part live performance footage from their local town hall with all eleventeen people in attendance, part stop-motion claymation footage. Remember when CKY had that video for “Inhuman Creation Station” that was all stop-motion, that Bam directed? Yeah, this isn’t that. This is more like, Morph from “SMart”, but Mark Speight sculpted him AFTER he hung himself... 

The rest of the album finds itself in a bit of a pattern creatively. “C. Exigua” contains some quality guitar work and a pleasant solo, while “...Again” takes things too far, over-delivering on the fret-wankery, almost trying too hard. “Mellow Breeze” utilises some more crooned vocals for a slight change of pace but it’s quite anti-climactic, while “W.B.C.” again is very heavily layered in production. There is a lot going on here and we find another track blended in a messy, convoluted headache. Closing track “Blue Sky Vengeance” does have some enjoyable, funky bass lines that stand out because you can actually hear them here, but that’s about it for that. 

As stated, as musicians, these lads can very obviously play, and they are more than technically proficient. Yes, it’s their debut album, yes, they want all the bells and whistles and yes, they have the potential to deliver some genuinely strong material in the probably near future, but they need to rein it in a little and understand less can be more. A lot of the time they don’t allow each other room to breathe, and the result is an often time needlessly noisy album. “Pyrography” sounds like a combination of pyromania and pornography...which I guess they think is hot by some means of a burning passion? It’s more like gonorrhea if you ask me; treatable but best not to have it in the first place...[4] 

Merthyr Tydfil is no stranger to live music. Whether it’s a large outdoor gathering in Cyfarthfa Park, which has hosted everyone from DONNY OSMOND and MADNESS, to ANTI-FLAG and TAKING BACK SUNDAY, or whether it’s one of the towns smaller bars or, venues like The New Crown, or The Redhouse, who offer everything from local bands, karaoke, cover/tribute acts, or artists like KIDS IN GLASS HOUSES, TOPLOADER, HOLDING ABSENCE and WHEATUS. There’s always something for everyone. 

This includes heavy alternative music too, as for a good while, local promoter Scott Meredith would organise CELTIC MOSH, a monthly music night of some of the UK’s hardest, fresh, up and coming underground metal acts. He regularly brought the heavy...but, it’s safe to say, few expected the level of heaviness about to hit this traditionally industrial town tonight. On Wednesday, May 31st, RIFF YARD MEDIA was a welcomed guest in The Redhouse, as UK Goregrind / death ’n’ roll veterans CARCASS makes Merthyr their morgue for the evening...and they brought friends. Let's see what unfolds as we go headbanging in the heads of the valleys... 

As per, the day was an adventure purely because this reviewer had completely forgotten about the gig. I was on lunch at the day job, sat in the Sun enjoying a cigarette, checking my emails, when I open a message from HOLD TIGHT PR (Thank you Lisa) confirming my press allocation for the event. I initially think, awesome, look forward to that, let me double check when it is again...oh...it’s TONIGHT? Shit. This alters my evening. No boring sitcom–esque cliches needed but insert the absolute mad-rush montage here of me trying to get into Merthyr for the 7pm doors after work. Imagine Benny Hill but in Drop G tuning... 

Regardless, I get to Merthyr for AROUND 7pm(ish), and there is a noticeably unusual amount of people with Camo cargo shorts and denim battle vests, full of random-ass patches. You can tell there’s a metal gig going down. One lad had a U2 badge sewn on though...and I am quite surprised he wasn’t taken to where the streets have no name, and been subject to a Wednesday bloody Wednesday to the point where the local police still haven’t found what they're looking for. I digress. Heading up the steps at the entrance of The Redhouse, I get my entry wristband, grab a pint can from their café-turned-bar room and head in to prepare for tonight's only support act; CONJURER. 

The Warwickshire 4-piece (Consisting of guitarist/vocalist Dan Nightingale, guitarist/vocalist Brady Deeprose, bassist Conor Marshall and drummer Noah See) are on a mission to reduce the Redhouse to rubble tonight, and they probably could have given time. While their set begins sweetly enough with some acoustic backing track and blue mood lighting, they soon tear into “It Dwells” and for the next 45 minutes, there is zero respite. It’s a small venue, and every riff, every throat burning scorcher of a vocal line has nowhere to go but through you, as you feel the bass, physically pummelling your chest harder than the local Gurnos boy racer, with the newest copied Clubland CD on full volume in his second-hand stolen Vauxhall Corsa. Both vocalists are situated either side of the stage, allowing Conor to take FULL advantage of his long locks and windmill his hair like he’s been sponsored by Head & Shoulders. Honestly, it’s majestic. 

There’s little in the way of communication between band and crowd here as they mean business, as they soon switch into “Rot” for a “Pathos” double-header. The slower, doom aspects of their metal, with subtle djent qualities really scrapes the gutter for this death-inspired onslaught; it truly is unforgiving. “Suffer Alone” has a far faster pacing and the punk-rich percussion allows this death/thrash monster to just tear through this packed hall. ”Scorn”, taken off their debut EP “I” showcases their early material, and the dual approach of Dan, who has the deeper, demonic vocals, while Brady has the higher pitched visceral snarling, giving them an extra dynamic. At one point Dan just steps away from the mic and just growls into the crowd and we can still hear him fine. Impressive control and projection credit to him, the bear that he is. The crowd don’t need much warming up on this fine summer evening but, fair play, Conjurer came in hot.

It’s weird, right? We’re at the arse end of 2022, and Covid still crops up in the conversation regarding bands plans and ideas. Typically, you’d find that bands were a bit lost, because tours were cancelled, so they’d push some extra exclusive merch to compensate, or …they’d work on a cheeky EP to tide fans over, or even just jump straight into writing their next album. But oh no, not LORDI...

The Finnish Eurovision favourites decided fuck it; following 2020’s “Killection”, they weren’t going to get to work on the next album, or even a double-album, no, that’s too uninspired; unoriginal and quite frankly boring. The band decided to work on a concept BOX-SET, of SEVEN consecutive new and original albums,  between 2021-2022 under the banner of “Lordiversity”.  

A modern, retroactive time-capsule, it spans multiple genres, eras and sounds, spanning decades, covering the growth and evolution in fashionable rock ’n’ roll, but with that beastly, Lordi twist. The question is; can a bunch of pantomime shock rockers pull off such a feat? Let’s find out, as we plough through these 78 tracks, wishing they could have settled for an EP... 

The series starts off with “Skelectric Dinosaur” and we find ourselves back in the late 1970’s, where rock music was at that initial turning point. That transition between the more innocent, formative rock ‘n’ roll, swing and more blues influenced styles, to what we now refer to separately as classic rock.  It opens up with “SCG Minus 7: The Arrival” and with its church organs, haunting wails and children's giggles, telling you that “Monsters are coming” …it’s quite the creepy introduction. This however leads us into disappointment, as we’re greeted with first track proper; “Day Off Of The Devil”.  

Musically absolutely fine for the style they are going for, imagine, KANSAS, or, ALICE COOPER or even BLUE OYSTER CULT, they’ve nailed that classic guitar tone and recording quality, credit to them, and it’s a decent, chilled out rock track, however the intro promised something a lot more sinister. The question is, how DOES the devil spend his days off? Is he there with a bowl of Coco Pops, sat on the couch in his pyjamas watching Disney+ on a Saturday morning? Who knows.... who cares...not me.  

“Starsign Spitfire” has a very slow, plodding pace to it, while it does have some decent backing vocal harmonies elevating the chorus. “The Tragedy Of Annie Mae” has a very DEEP PURPLE-esque bass-line fuelling the track and it rumbles along nicely. We do eventually finish album one off with “...And Beyond The Isle Was Mary”, and we get a quaint, piano-filled piece with rainy sound effects, resulting in a gentle closing number.  They nailed the sound of the era and have delivered well here overall; it’s not a bad start. 

Next up we have the album “Superflytrap” and we transition rather quickly from the origins of rock and early metal, into the bright lights of the discotheque. The intro piece, “SCG Minus 6: Delightful Pop-Ins" is totes cringe babes, with the porn parody content. Some bimbo taking in the pizza guy, and the pool guy, like some seedy classic blue-movie plot-segue, until the monster breaks in and there’s screaming and terror, and it’s all a bit shit. I pray Asylum don’t read this; their movies are bad enough as it is... 

The actual opening tracks “Macho Freak” and “Believe Me” are a bit better. It’s not always easy to recreate that nostalgic disco/club vibe musically with it coming out authentic, but credit to a band like Lordi, they’ve managed it. The funk-fuelled synths, alongside the twangy guitars, in this day and age remind me of DEREK BISHOP if you’re interested in modern disco, and to be fair, the band, despite their appearance, don’t sound cheesy doing this. “Bella From Hell” capitalises on some genuinely soulful backing vocals, while “Cast Out From Heaven” tries to be a genuine ballad, and, let's be honest, the vocals do NOT suit this approach. This is too jarring.  

Where do we go from here?  Album number three; “The Masterbeast From The Moon”, and we enter prog-rock territory. Inspired by the likes of PINK FLOYD etc, it’s a more ambitious piece but do a band like Lordi have the ability to pull this off? Let’s get one thing straight here, no... the answer is no. “Moonbeast” utilises an almost GHOST-like character instrumentally but that’s genuinely as good as it gets. The praise ends here. “Hurricane Of The Slain” highlights this point as, the piano rich, orchestrally led strings of the track are gorgeous, but the clash with the gruff vocals absolutely ruins things. It’s all well and good trying new things musically, but when the vocals are so often stagnant, it has a detrimental effect on the entire project. “Church Of The Succubus” at over 11 minutes fits better in the whole prog-rock aesthetic, but even that can’t save this record.  

What do we have next? “Abusement Park”, and I can’t lie to you, I do love a play on words; this title tickles me. It reminds me of JOHNNY KNOXVILLE in the film “Action Point”, but I digress. The title track absolutely reeks of classic heavy metal with the pacing, the key transitions, the style of percussion, it’s got a semi-MOTORHEAD vibe to it as well as the likes of W.A.S.P., almost power-metal in places, and it’s very up-tempo and energetic. It can be a bit cheesy with some incredibly cliched names like “Ghost Train” and “Rollercoaster”, but it’s to be expected. “Carousel” has some wonderfully emotive, smooth, sensual guitar playing that reek of the 80’s, while “Pinball Machine” harbours this strong AC/DC, or, JUDAS PRIEST level of vocal screeching.  

“Nasty, Wild & Naughty” harbours all of that overdone rock ’n’ roll sleaze lyrically, despite being a catchy piece of rock with all of the cowbell, before “Merry Blah Blah Blah” comes out of the blue as a Christmas single. The bells and choirs are there, the Santa references are there... but do you know what is also there? Me, making Ebeneezer Scrooge feel uncomfortable with my lack of festive spirit. Pull a cracker, the joke will be this song, I promise. I mean, WHY?! 

Next up we have “Humanimals” and we’ve reached our more, BON JOVI and AOR inspired tracks, and it shows. Opening track proper “Borderline” has a real, I guess, bon-jovial vibe to it (I’m sorry) with its light, up-beat synths and almost hushed percussion. The chorus houses some smoother gang vocals and its honestly quite the pleasant little track instrumentally. “Victims Of The Romance” utilises a more guitar driven approach in comparison but it reeks of that, all-too parodied hair-metal era. If you choose to picture Lordi with mullets in spandex, well, that challenging wank is on YOU my friend. “The Bullet Bites Back” stands out with its genuinely sleek guitar tones, and especially it’s solo, before we revisit “Like A Bee To The Honey”. A decent piece (Written by KISS) but, two years old, and practically becoming filler at this point.  

Our penultimate album, “Abracadaver” leans further into the emergence of what we now fondly refer to as modern metal, with that transitional period, from the mid to late 1980’s into the 1990’s. Ignoring the now tedious intro bit, we dive into “Devilium”, and we’re met with a bombardment of riffs, old-school thrash metal aesthetics and vocals that could make onions cry. The title-track isn’t much better truth be told. You CAN hear “Big-4” elements but the track does eventually descend into utter fret-wankery. “Beast Of Both Worlds” is arguably as good as it gets on this one, with it’s very SLAYER-esque chugging riff-work and rhythmic snarls. Done well enough but, beyond dated. 

Finally, then, and oh how glad I am knowing this (Excited for this one? Hell no, I’m just glad this is over with), we round things up with “Spooky Sextravaganza Spectacular” and that name alone reeks of ROB ZOMBIE. “Demon Supreme” utilises darker synths and a semi-industrial aesthetic to give the ol' Dragula a right good rear ending. It’s a touch repetitive but it’s got an energy to it and reminds me of POWERMAN 5000 in ways. “Lizzard Of Oz” houses more chugging riffs, with a strong electronic core sound, something which a more industrial metal unit might partake-in.  

“Skull And Bones (The Danger Zone)” repeats this seemingly Rob Zombie inspired instrumental direction, with it sounding aesthetically very similar. “Shake The Baby Silent” is top quality parenting advice it has to be said, Mr. Lordi collecting his dad of the year award over here, well done. Skip the bottle feed, jump straight to infanticide. It took seven albums but we do actually get our first actual stand-out highlight in the form of “Terror Extra-Terrestrial”. The intro spoils it a little bit, with its E.T parody segue, but we get a frankly quirky piece of synth-driven hard rock, and it’s honestly rather catchy. We ultimately finish up very ironically however, with the track “Anticlimax”...and I’m not even going to make any jokes here, the audio speaks for itself. After seven albums, completing this seventy-eight-track endurance test has to be rewarded in some aspect surely? Not in the slightest. 

Lordi tried something different here; they have to applauded for their creative ambition, that’s without question. What DOES need to be questioned though, is why the hell they couldn’t do seven concept EP’s instead of seven full bloody albums? They could have very easily cherry-picked specific highlights, and made a far more digestible, and more importantly, enjoyable listening experience. Seventy-eight tracks, allows for far, far too much filler, and truth be told, fodder. They managed to occasionally hit certain spots musically, and instrumentally to diversify these albums into their genre’s, which is the entire point OF “Lordiversity” as a concept, but vocally they just aren’t capable of really delivering; it’s very one-dimensional for the most part, and that grates over time.

In summary... Monstrous? Check. Mediocre? Also check. If concept albums are your thing, love anthologies and collecting box-sets, or simply are a die-hard Lordi fan, you'll likely enjoy this for what it is. If you specifically like a certain style or genre, feel free to sift through your own preferences accordingly, you MIGHT get something out of it, but, as a complete package, this is at a level of grandiosity Lordi really shouldn't be dabbling in. For me? This review is finally over...give me a hard rock hallelujah! [4]

Allow me to preface the following review, with an outpouring of regret, grief, more regret, bewilderment and, a little bit more regret, through a literary veil of self-therapy. There was absolutely zero reason, obligating me to conduct the following review, but, at the same time, there was absolutely EVERY reason that I couldn’t NOT do this review. This is the review equivalent of Hogan v Warrior at WrestleMania VI, but with more baby oil...let me set the stage. 

You know by now that, while I am perfectly capable of writing a decent, or at the very least, serious review, whether here or over on ALL ABOUT THE ROCK, I get my kicks out of the more, unusual and questionable releases available to me. I can point my finger at the likes of, KIM PETRAS, or, going back to COREY FELDMAN; I like a challenge, but this is the sort of thing that can break a man. This can Brokeback Mountain the fuck out of a man...this is “Ram Ranch” by GRANT MACDONALD, and I blame young Charlie Bryant for this 1 hour and 7 minutes of audio torture. Even the inmates at Guantanamo Bay would feel sorry for me here, but, fuck it...saddle up, we’re going in (Dry)… 

Firstly, who IS Grant Macdonald? Little is known about this alleged Canadian, other than that he might be Canadian, and his name might be Grant Macdonald...he’s like the BANKSY of homoerotic cowboy rock. The album we’re tackling today originally came out in 2012, so, aside from being a rare case of retrospective reviewing from me, we’ve had a decade to process, and at times, begrudgingly accept “Ram Ranch”. It’s been used as pro-LGBTQ+ content in protests and rallies, and over its existence it became a running meme and an ongoing source of absurdity. To this day Grant has apparently released SIX HUNDRED variants of “Ram Ranch”, which is frankly both impressive and alarming. Dude has a passion, what can I say? With that said, the only way is down, as we process this piece of... art? 

The album opens up with the title track, and, we initially have a dose of rather subdued heavy metal instrumentation, with all of the riffs, licks and kick drums. I say subdued because it’s practically background noise. On a production level, it’s like a demo in terms of audio quality, but the capability is there, that in itself is promising...but it’s the vocal content that draws attention here.  

Allow me to set the tone lyrically; “18 naked cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch, big hard throbbing cocks wanting to be sucked, 18 naked cowboys wanting to be fucked? Cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch on their knees wanting to suck cowboy cocks; Ram Ranch really rocks!”. This is the primary content of the track from start to finish, and it’s the absurdity of this that, at first, makes it mildly amusing and, quite distressing simultaneously. The worst bit? The spoken-word over metal sounds like, CHILLS, arguably THE WORST YouTube narrator in the history of the internet, got a record deal. The repetition and looping of track one IS painful, sure, but we have 11 tracks left. Even my Jack Daniel’s needs a Jack Daniel’s... 
 
Second track “Plowboy” has such a reverberated overlay of vocal samples, it becomes an absolute trippy mess from the moment it starts, with some, moog-esque synths, setting the tone for some almost 70’s porn rock sleaze. It’s the kind of thing to make your eye twitch, which one all depends on you and your tastes, I’m not here to discriminate. 

Next up we have, “Cowboys Fucking Cowboys” and, you remember when KID ROCK was like, “I wanna’ be a Cowboy baby!”? Yeah, we’re going to shatter his dreams right now. The gentle acoustics here could easily, EASILY be used for a more serious, affectionate country ballad, but there’s so much lyrical cowboy fucking here, riding butthole’s deep...it’s like...you know when ROGER ALAN WADE did “If You’re Gonna’ Be Dumb” for JACKASS, but instead of a montage of stunts, it was gay porn...that about sums it up. 
 
“Prince Harry” returns abruptly to that riff-heavy metal musicality, and it’s a wonder how the ever-loving fuck he got away with this one. I don’t know if this would be art, slander, or character assassination, but telling him to ride those big hard ram ranch cowboy cocks, bouncy, bouncy up and down, up and down, drink that cum, ram another cock up your royal bum? I don’t even know where the line is legally with this. I think of Harry now, in 2022, but this was ten years ago, ok Harry was still 28 at the time, but Christ. This is worse than that time he wore that Nazi costume to a party and made the front page. Who would have thought THAT could be topped? 

Next up, I feel personally attacked, as we have “Suck That Cock Gavin”, and, no. Firstly I’m not even joking, that’s that track name! I’m barely here to listen to the album, I’m certainly not signing up for that. I recently reviewed VR SEX and not even they were that immersive, calm the fuck down Grant! Or at least buy me dinner first!? I’ll take the salad, hold the ram ranch dressing please... 

“Big Hard Cowboy Cock” sounds like, generic mid 90’s WCW music, excluding the lyrics, obviously, Ted Turner wouldn’t tolerate that. Imagine like, the Nitro Girls were gay cheerleaders? Disco Inferno and Alex Wright would have much better careers. ” Hard Horsecock” implies that we’re entering the world of bestiality here now, and I don’t even know what I can get away with. We’ve all heard the phrase ‘hung like a horse’, but this is sung like a cunt. “12 Inch Cock” has industrialised metal elements but it’s more like, queer factory than FEAR FACTORY, while “Stable Boy” houses a more urbanised gangsta-rap / hip-hop aesthetic, but it drops more soap than it does bars. 

Ultimately, whoever Grant Macdonald is...he’s committed. Or at least he should be. Credit to him, I can barely think of the words to sum this up. Not since AC/DC has an artist produced so much content with so little substance. Sure, he’s able to mix it up musically, utilising rock and metal, country and Americana, as well as hip-hop, so he’s technically actually better than AC/DC, but lyrically and vocally, I’m assuming it’s something you have to be in-on, or, ‘get’.

Ideal for reaction videos, or making friends and family question you when they hear you play it on Spotify, but, at over an hour long, it’s not a fun album in the slightest, and once the initial shock wears off, and you’ve done the whole “Wtf?” head shake, it very quickly becomes monotonous and boring. Let’s be honest, there’s only so much hard throbbing cowboy cock you can take, y’know? No? Ok then... [0]

What is there to say about 2020, that hasn't already been said? Within these reviews over the past nine months I've light-heartedly made reference to issues like Covid-19 and such, but let's not detract from the seriousness of the whole situation. As a calendar year, 2020 was one of the most difficult, frustrating, upsetting and confusing in recent history, and this isn't strictly down to Coronavirus...this time last year we were on the brink of World War 3! Politics has been a shambles, social injustice has been rife, the divide in both community spirit and the classes seemingly continues to grow, and generally speaking, the world is a complete mess. Luckily we've had music to keep us going, if not to keep us sane, and for that at least I am grateful. The images above showcase my personal highlights of 2020, grouped in categories covering pop, metal, EP's and general favourites, and it shows that, despite the state of the world, music flourishes. Music and the arts are SO important, as many of us learned during national lockdown, and we need to appreciate the people who dedicated their lives to creating that art SO much, because times like these prove we'd be lost without them. 

I mean, just looking at the cover art above, it's been as diverse a year as any. MILEY CYRUS embraced her inner rocker on her new album, having collaborated with the likes of BILLY IDOL and JOAN JETT. Groups like STEPS made an unexpected comeback showing they've still got it in an ever changing pop industry, as did MELANIE C. From a metal standpoint, PARADISE LOST prove they just get better with age, as they not only released one of the albums of their career, they also found themselves in the UK Top 40! Imagine that! Goth metal on Radio 1! It gives hope to newer acts like SOUTH OF SALEM who delivered a truly stunning debut album, and certify themselves as ones to watch for sure. There have also been plenty of superb EP's released over the past twelve months...especially VV. Ville Valo surprised everyone with his 3-track EP and HIM fans rejoiced at the new material, I for one certainly cannot wait to hear more from him. CHRISTINE AND THE QUEENS put emphasis on the art as their whole EP was turned into one big choreographed music video which was impressive, while I personally made some brilliant discoveries in the form of LUCIA & THE BEST BOYS and JACKIE. 

Finally then, my official albums of the year, and I was spoiled for choice to be fair. THE BIRTHDAY MASSACRE always deliver, they never release a bad album and I'm looking forward to catching up with Chibi on the rescheduled tour dates. MARILYN MANSON dropped his best album in years much to my delight, having found his last couple a little bit boring (Sorry Mazza!), GREY DAZE tugged at the heartstrings with a touching tribute to the late Chester Bennington, releasing unheard material from his pre-LINKIN PARK days, reminding us all how much we'll miss such a talented, brilliant human being. NINJA SEX PARTY on the other hand proved they remain one of the funniest groups around with their bonkers writing style, comedic lyricism and story-telling and wholesome attitude. Yes, 2020 has been a bit of a mess to say the least, but we've still got music, and as fans of that music, we've still got one another, and as a community, we need to hold on to that. With that said, below, is my official GTGC Spotify playlist of 2020, with 40 hand-picked tracks spanning the above records, and it is dedicated to my very good friend Scot 'JD' Rees, who is sadly no longer with us in body, but will forever be with us in heart and spirit. Whether he had a Jack & Coke in his hand, or his guitar, he was always laughing at something, and his energy for enjoyment was infectious. I will miss you Scot, and this compilation is for you. X

Remember the phenomenon that was ‘Chuck Norris Facts’? The man / minor deity can do so many astonishing yet equally absurd things, like, being able to make fire by rubbing ice cubes, or, being the only person able to kick you in the back of the face, or even being able to speak French…in Russian. I could go on (Literally I can read them for hours and laugh to myself quite contently) but it’s that last one that tediously links me to today’s band because I am unable to just, review things normally. Yes, allow me to introduce you to today’s band; L’HOMME ABSURDE.

Hailing from Moscow, Russia, yet with a French name that translates as ‘The Absurd Human’, L’Homme Absurde are a progressive post-hardcore five-piece, consisting of vocalist Alexey Slavin, guitarists Alexandr Safronov & Roman Savenkov, bassist Pavel Gorshkov and drummer Evgeny Loboda, and they’ve been gradually building their reputation since their formation in 2016. With their fusion of metalcore and melodic black metal, they hope to continue to spread their absurdity across Europe with their newest album “Belong”…but do they belong in my ears? Noob Heavy PR asked me to check it out…

The album opens up with “0” which is pretty appropriate given the way this album kicks off…it’s all about momentum, all is still as we get nothing but relaxed percussion and some semi-dreamscape acoustic instrumentation while the record comes to life, as it’s pulse strengthens,  but we suddenly find ourselves enveloped in a blanket of brutally tortured vocals and a more metallic approach in tone, despite its melodic retention. It gives us a sense of artistic drive and direction early on, for sure. First track proper then “Rot” capitalises on the surging blackened metal tendencies the band have by pummelling the listener with a barrage of semi-psychotic instrumentation. Equally melodic yet mauling; it summarises the bands sounds wonderfully.

This can be said of album highlight “Separation” too which takes an almost early post-punk direction with the initial guitars, before we break into more snarled vocals and post-hardcore riff work; this is arguably as catchy as things get over the course of these eight tracks, finding it’s home between the likes of KVELERTAK and MAN THE MACHETES. It’s up-beat and rocking, all the while groove rich and melodic, and a superb piece of modern metal. Elsewhere “Burn” and “Forsaken” continue this approach of searing blackened melodies while incorporating subtle doom atmospherics into the more traditional metal guitar work, before we eventually finish up on ”Sanctuary”. The semi-acoustic opening and soft vocals allowing for a sense of closure and finality to wind the mood down somewhat…or so we thought, as this too erupts into a visceral barrage of pained vocals at the tracks midway point, peaking with a final flurry, before the low-key instrumentation transitions right back into “0” and we appropriately come full circle, as the album essentially loops, which is cleverly done.

Overall, while Russia isn’t exactly prominent in the world metal scene in terms of household names, L’Homme Absurde are clearly equipped to throw down with some of their more established Scandinavian neighbours. Blackened metalcore may sound a touch niche on paper but there’s enough here in terms of subtle variety to at least warrant checking this out for most fans of alternative heavy music. It’s a solid album and one that could potentially find them larger audiences across Europe, and to suggest otherwise would be, well, absurd. [6]

You know when I say that I’m hopeless at keeping on top of my emails and submissions? Well ladies and gentlemen, this review is about to absolutely confirm that. Back in motherfucking JANUARY I was sent an email by the team over at Noob Heavy PR, and they brought to my attention a Canadian group called PURVEYORS OF SONIC DOOM. Now the name is pretty self-explanatory, but the email in question was to inform me that they were dropping a new double EP set; “Eyeless Void” and “Entombed Black Earth” respectively…

Given some of the artists and releases I’ve seen over the past year or so, I made an educated guess and thought to myself…I COULD cover the EP’s now, BUT, odds on the tracks will be bundled into a full length album of some sort somewhere down the line, so I’ll save myself the hassle and wait for the album. This…was a mistake. Having checked up on the duo (Consisting of guitarist/vocalist Ted Gloom and drummer/vocalist Nick Tooms) I find that no…they have not bundled things into one album…oh no…they have in fact now got fucking FOUR EP’s on the go. They keep this up and I’m going to be taken over by some sort of sludge metal mitosis…so let’s get this out of the way.

We’ll start off with “Eyeless Void” and its title track, and it’s got about as much momentum as a set of church bells before a minute’s silence. I actually thought the track was stuck on a loop, until it eventually shifts up a gear…though by that I mean it just, does the same with a couple more BPM. This is such a monotonous, deep chugging affair; it’s actually more of a pointless void. If you manage to sit through it mind at the five and half minute mark it does actually come to life a bit, but by then, really, who cares? “Rot Covered Gold” if anything is inaccurate because gold doesn't rot in the conventional sense, so there’s that…and the song itself is more of the same, thought at least we have vocals this time. Sparse, but they are there; echoed and torn in anguish like they too are lost in this void. “Flayed One” seems to showcase more urgency with the more continuous riff work and suspenseful key changes, though it ultimately slows down to more of the same, before we round off with a cover of HELL HAMMER’s “Third Of Storms” from 1983’s “Satanic Rites”. Naturally, nearly four decades on, the production will sound better…but the fuzzy, distorted barrage of sludge detracts from the rawness of the early black metal, and the slower tempo does nothing for it…

Next up we have the “Entombed Black Earth” EP and we kick off with “Sea Farers Lament” and while the intro suggests we’re going to have some cleaner, or smoother production quality, we’re soon back to normal with the same sludge-thick riffs and more of the almost vacuous vocals that sound, again, lost…or maybe appropriately entombed. It sounds like he’s singing into one of those old children’s toy microphones that make your voice all warbly and echoed for a while. “Mongrel Dog”, has certain atmospheric elements, giving off a cold, icy tone, while the title track, “Astral Witch”  and “Titan Blood” all share similar tropes and qualities, and very little differentiates either from the other. Here is where I realise, after fifty minutes of music, I should have run the review back when I was first aware of these two EP’s…now I have two more…please improve.

The third EP is “Mankind Is Unkind” and given the current state of the world with the events that are unfolding, that statement couldn’t possibly be any truer. “Old Lore” gets us underway here and there’s a brief spoken word segment about flipping over to side B, so maybe I was meant to listen to this last? I don’t know…but it doesn’t take long for those sluggish, chugging, doom-inspired riffs to take command of the track. They have perked up a LITTLE bit however, as proven towards the climax of “Bachanalian”, where they up the ante in terms of the thrashier aspects of their metal, and it’s here a pattern is clearer. Slow, lethargic sludge thick metal, quick bursts of blackened thrash and then back to the dolorous doom rich riffs. It’s practically copy and paste…speaking of which, we have the “Sonic Colossus” EP. It’s essentially just the “Entombed…” EP remastered, but they’ve replaced “Mongrel…” with a new title track…that’s all it is. That track itself has another lengthy, drawn out intro, before we randomly have a sound bite from the famous “Daddy Chill” video, where the old dude demands “What the hell is even that?!”…and that right there perfectly summarises this series of EP’s for me.

​While there are glimmers of hope and interest scattered across these four EP’s, like the switches in tonality here and there that allow some of the riffs to sound more varied, and where the blackened thrash aspects work best despite being underutilised, the vast majority of the recordings here follow too much of the same formula, let alone the recycled tracks. Yes I know that, any doom-inspired audio is going to run the risk of being slow, labouring and monotonous, but this level of rinse and repeat is the sludge metal equivalent of ED SHEERAN…now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to have my ears syringed with a use heroin needle. [3]

OK so, back in May I debuted a new blog feature which I dubbed the "Unlucky Dip", where I take a break from reviewing full length albums and EP's, to give the singles a chance. It not only allows me to cover a wider variety of artists and genres in one swoop, but it reminds me of albums that will be coming out, and helps me clear more of my never ending barrage of emails. Last time around I was a little mean to one or two of the artists, but as I did point out, this feature IS a sort of cross between speed dating and a comedy roast. Luckily for these seven new artists I generally like all of the tracks I'm about to talk about, which is rare...unluckily for you however this may not be as much of an enjoyable read as the last one! Anyway, with that said, let's get into some music.

I'd like to kick things off with some genuine positivity and excitement. THE SOUNDS are one of the bands I can thank Bam Margera for getting me into way back in the day, and while I was happy to have them back with their EP "The Tales That We Tell" in 2017, we haven't had a full album from Maja and co in seven years!

"Safe And Sound" is the latest single, taken from the highly anticipated new album "Things We Do For Love", which drops June 12th. Originally planned for a May release but put back due to Covid-19, their blend of lightly electronic tinged indie rock 'n' roll sounds as distinct and fresh as ever here...I guess you could say they haven't missed a Tony the beat! I'm very much looking forward to this album and you can expect to find it in my end of year lists for sure.

This one was a submission from the people over at Pop Rush Music and as far as I can tell, this is a stand alone single, as there's been no mention to me of any releases to follow this up. The single in question; "Hunters & Wolves" is by an artist by the name of JORDAN LAKE. Not to be confused with the reservoir, Jordan was born in North Carolina and found his love for singing very early on.

At the age of 4 he became a church singer at his local parish and has had a passion for performing ever since. Now older and having relocated to the West coast, Jordan is writing mature, soulful and emotive pop music that in it's own ways bridges the likes of ADAM LAMBERT with RAG 'N' BONE MAN. Listen below and let me know what you think!

Well..this escalated quickly! GAEREA are a self-confessed cathartic black metal outfit from Portugal, and they were brought to my attention by the folk over at Season Of Mist. 

"Null" is the first track to be taken off their up-coming third album "Limbo" which is released on July 24th and if this track is anything to go by, the six-track 50-minute album is going to be one hell of a journey. There are European tour plans in place for the beginning of 2021, though they are scheduled to play a UK exclusive show in London on October 31st at the Nabucca, which you may want to keep an eye on if you're a fan of black and death metal, as it's part of the Subterranean Manifestation II line-up. Hopefully it goes ahead, and I'll say it again...fuck Covid-19.

This one is arguably the weakest of the seven tracks I'm going through today but that's purely on account the other 6 tracks, as this is still a fun little single and I'm actually not trying to be mean for once. 360 PHOENIX FLIP is the new (Albeit convoluted) moniker by which Mark Lovett now goes by.

Combining his love of skate-punk and artists such as NOFX and RUFIO, with his already experienced background in song production and EDM, he brings us his debut single "Pyromaniac" and the best way to describe it I believe would be, somewhere between OWL CITY and REGGIE & THE FULL EFFECT. Make of that what you will, but I like this and I look forward to what else he has in store. Maybe you'll find him in the new Tony Hawk remastered game soundtrack? At this time of writing I have no links to share with you, as the SoundCloud link was private...sorry.

Now this...this one is fucking bold. GHOST, who you may be familiar with as arguably the biggest rising metal / alternative rock band on the planet, helped cement their status with the song "Square Hammer" from the "Popestar" EP. BEFORE SUNDAY, are a London based duo who have only recently released their debut EP, yet here we find them covering Ghost...and the track isn't even a part of their EP!

Yes thanks to Angels PR, the duo have been in touch with label-mate Marianna from PROJECT RENEGADE and other talented musician friends, to collaborate on this lock-down cover. To be fair, instrumentally at least, they've done the song justice as it barely strays from the original in tone, it's quite a by numbers cover, but naturally they aren't replacing Tobias on vocals, so that's where they differ, although they've stayed true to the original video too in their own ways, taking limitations into account. It's a brave cover, but no real complaints for execution. 

In case you're wondering why there is no art work for this single, it's because the band didn't supply any jpeg files of the artwork. Plenty of photo's of the band, sure, but none of the artwork. The image included in their press kit isn't usable sadly as I was unable to separate and save it to file. Could I message them and ask for a jpeg of the image? I could, of course I could...but it's really not worth the effort.

Anyway, JULIPER SKY are an up-and-coming indie-pop outfit based out of Manchester, UK, and having already released their debut EP this year entitled "Visions Of A New Age", they continue to release separate singles. Opinions vary as to how effective and efficient this is from a marketing stand point...on one hand you can keep fresh content coming and keep up the exposure and relevance...on the other hand, and this is something I believe personally, is that it's annoying and I'd rather you just keep the material for the 2nd EP...let's be honest most of the tracks are going to end up on the debut album anyway, so many artists do it, and I just find it all pointless myself. I digress..."Afterglow" is the kind of light pop-based indie that might appeal to fans of BLOSSOMS for example. You'll have to take my word for it though as again, it comes out on June 26th, and I have no Bandcamp, Spotify or Youtube links to share with you. I might review the EP, give you a better idea.

Today then we finish up on this absolute gem, and another genuine bit of excitement. MUSHROOMHEAD have been going damn near thirty years now and having gone through a couple of line-up changes, they still have an incredibly prolific yet criminally underrated back catalog of albums. 

Having always faced criticism for being SLIPKNOT knock-offs, they never hit the heights they deserved to, but hopefully that will change on their upcoming new album "A Wonderful Life"; their first since 2014! The latest single promoting the album; "The Heresy" see's the real debut of new full time vocalist Ms. Jackie, as well a returning J Mann to bring some welcome nostalgia and heritage to their sound. The clean female vocals add a new dynamic which works really with their heavy, dystopian, underground progressive grunge metal style, and the political message of the single simply adds relevance. I cannot wait for this album, which comes out June 19th via Napalm Records.

So this review was not on my schedule…it wasn’t submitted to me as a request, nor was it generally even on my radar. Quite frankly I had absolutely no idea who the fuck these were, however, a good friend of mine Rob De Boer lovingly forwarded them to me. I’ve known Rob a few years now through mutual friends and a mutual love of HIM, and all things Jackass related, and the last time I saw him properly was when we saw CKY at Manchester. Fun night…Matt Deis got lost in the venue he was playing, and I think there was a stabbing…good gig though.

I digress…Rob has recently started up his own podcast called SETTING THE TONE, where he takes a moment to go over his thoughts and opinions of various new singles from up and coming artists, and generally discuss relevant topics in the music industry; openly sharing his views and is worthy of your support. He was sent this EP to check out and do a piece on, and wanted to know what I thought of them myself.  Now I don’t know Rob’s final thoughts on the artist, we’re a little different in our approach…but those of you who are regular readers can probably guess where this is going…

The band in question, are FIGHT THE TORNADO and I immediately hope their influences include Matt Hardy 1.0. Consisting of members Jonny Young on vocals and multi-instrumentation, and Lindzi North on vocals and…sanity maintenance? Both of whom were former members of the symphonic metal band CURSE OF DAWN (Part of me wonders if they were fired…harsh you say? Patience you must have my young Padawan) though we find them gearing up for the release of their debut EP “Maelstrom Of Thought” on June 26th. With that tornado in mind, are they going to blow us away or simply just suck? Let’s find out…

The EP begins with “Mercurial Inventions” and truth be told, the intro is actually promising…it’s got a light, bubbly electronic aura and sounds like it’s about to delve into some nostalgic synth pop…but without the slightest hint of transition we’re thrust into a barrage of progressive nu metal riffage and it’s like, where the actual fuck did this come from? You know that meme with the dog sat in a room on fire, stating that this is fine? This is the soundtrack to that image. It’s so off-kilter and jarring you can’t help but wonder if this really was intentional, and that’s before we even get to the vocals. Fleeting between snarling and angelic, though neither of them hit the mark; it’s like, I would have PERSONALLY paid for the use of autotune for you to save myself the grief of hearing this.

We follow this with EP highlight “Comfort Zone” and yes I actually said highlight there…we start off in a similar fashion combining pulsing electronica with metallic riffs but here it’s all blended noticeably better, as in, it’s actually blended. Vocally then, I want to point out that the snarls in ways remind me of NEW PROJECT and the aggressive aspects of this work, but when we get to the cleaner, melodic vocals it’s an actual dumpster fire. The chorus manages to hold a note, an albeit incredibly flat and lifeless one, but that is an achievement, trust me. The same issues arise during “Sensory Deprivation” and the title is more than fitting as I would sooner be deprived of my own sense of hearing than deal with this. How bad can this unconventionally tuned singing be I hear you ask? Well…here are just SOME ways to categorise this; a mute yodeller with a sore throat,  a wok full of spoons falling down the up-escalator like some painfully cacophonous slinky, the shared harmony of two stray cats shagging in the back lane. Not convinced? How about Wes Scantlin covering NIRVANA?

Sadly my friends, we aren’t done…the title track is an instrumental that to its credit, delivers conceptually, I’ll give it that. It goes from progressive rock and metal riffs, including a decent solo with more subtle synth work…before we introduce PAN PIPES out of nowhere, only to be followed up with alternating death metal blast beats and ambient reggaeton. I honestly can’t say ‘what the ever loving fuck’, with the adequate level of conviction here…seriously that was like a non-invasive lobotomy. If that wasn’t enough, “Atlas” kicks in with some goddamn BTEC “Tubular Bells” and I’m like, nope. I’m done. I’m out. Fight The Tornado? I would sooner gamble my genitals in a Dyson V10 Cyclone…and I can guarantee my cries of pain would hold better notes.  [2]

As I type this, the UK currently remains on lock-down (I use that term loosely mind you, we have a population of idiots that can’t grasp that)…social distancing is still in place as we still run the risk of infection from Covid-19. Worse, the weather has been beautiful throughout this, and life is generally frustrating, confusing and to a degree depressing in isolation…but do you know what will cheer you up? Doom metal…

While, yes, I said that with more than a pinch of sarcasm, today’s album is one I’ve genuinely been looking forward to all year, regardless of the events that have unfolded outside my front door, and that album is “Obsidian” by PARADISE LOST.  The Halifax based godfathers of Gothic doom metal have had an illustrious and influential career that in my opinion, hasn’t been fairly applauded. From their 1990 debut, they helped lay the very foundations for the Gothic metal genre and have an incredible discography that easily cements their status. Don’t just take my word for it however, as the 30-year veterans seem to be aging like a fine wine, having released a series of stunning albums in succession from “Faith Divides Us…” all the way through to the most recent release “Medusa”…can they keep it up however? Let’s find out…

The album opens up with “Darker Thoughts” and it’s the perfect intro in all fairness…the gently plucked acoustic guitars allowing for a misleading direction in tone, with its softer vocals and emotive string elements; it borders on medieval folk, before it erupts with a barrage of visceral snarls and it balances out perfectly. The contrast here is ideal and while not necessarily brutal, the initial disparity in these tones within one track shows great character, and it’s a beautiful opener. “Fall From Grace” follows up and as the lead single from the album it ticks all the expected boxes; it’s got the guttural growls, the methodical chugging guitars and it’s textbook Paradise Lost; bridging the slower doom elements of recent releases with the darker, tortured sound of their early Peaceville years, highlighting the bands consistency.

What’s consistency though without quality right? Well the album has plenty of that, in particular the tracks “Ghosts” and “Forsaken”. The former, getting underway with a solid, yet simple, commanding drum beat over a groove-heavy bass riff. It builds on its layers wonderfully, gradually incorporating chilling guitar notes with Nick Holmes’ deep vocal drawl, before we burst into life with some slick, hook laden melodic metal; this is wonderful stuff. If you thought that was good however, the latter embraces a truly angelic, beautifully haunting opening; setting a rich tone that oozes Gothic splendour. Greg Mackintosh delivers the goods with an impassioned solo too, which coupled with the subtle backing piano, makes for top drawer Paradise Lost.

The remainder of the album does however hit a certain plateau, but the standards are already set impressively high. “Serenity” is a no-nonsense barrage of deep growls and Gothic-laced metal, “Endless Days” then is a slower, more sombre offering with more emphasis on mood, before we eventually finish up on “Ravenghast”, another slow burner of a track, allowing the album to naturally come to a close with a warm down; letting the listener catch their breath and unwind. Obsidian really is a perfect fit in regards to the album’s title…the mineral, a naturally forming dark, volcanic crystal, balancing the destructive force of the lava it’s formed out of, with its own fragile beauty, sums up this record perfectly. Scorching and intense where warranted, harmonious an elegant where it matters…Paradise Lost have delivered yet again. [9]

This isn’t a review as such…but more of a call to arms if you will. Now, while I’ve touched on the current Coronavirus pandemic in recent reviews in a predominantly light-hearted manner, or at least trying to make light of the situation to maybe try to boost morale, it is in so many aspects in fact, a VERY serious situation. Businesses are shutting down, people are losing their jobs, people are losing their means to support their families, hell; people are fucking DYING! In such a time of need for many in an age of advanced communication and technology, some of us have never felt so far apart and, given the unprecedented nature of this global pandemic, it’s a hard realisation.

While the government (Here in the UK at least) is doing what it can to help certain businesses cover expenses while the country is on lock down, not everyone is fortunate enough to benefit from such subsidies and this is where both you and your local music venues come in. Small and independent venues have had a hard enough time over the last couple of years as it is, with several having to close doors up and down the country for financial reasons, or for dodgy housing development projects etc, so the last thing they need is a forced closure due to some Asian-ass virus because some dude in China did an Ozzy Osbourne with an infected bat.

I can’t say with certainty that your local venue is doing the same right now (Though if they are I urge you to support in any which way you can) but FUEL ROCK CLUB in Cardiff is one of the clubs that would be incredibly grateful for your support.  The award winning bar/venue situated in Womanby Street in the Welsh capital naturally relies on its punters and gig goers to pay the bills and the wages…but under forced closure, they face difficult times. Luckily, while we may not be currently able to attend the club in person, we can still help and support the club during this testing time, thanks to a new compilation album.

XIII PROMOTIONS based out of Cardiff have reached out to 30 bands and artists who have played, performed or promoted at the club, to piece together a 30-track compilation entitled “Rock Down: A Fuel Rock Club Benefit Compilation”. Available on Bandcamp as a digital download for £7.50, all proceeds raised will go towards ensuring the club doesn’t fall onto harder times that it’s already been put under, by contributing to venue upkeep etc while they have no custom. It’s a hell of an eclectic compilation, ranging from black and death metal, to punk, post-rock, blues, funk and even electronica, showcasing a plethora of genres represented by multiple scenes, who all support Fuel.  The link to Fuel’s Facebook is below, so if you can, go and buy some Fuel merch through their official channels, and the bandcamp link is also included. My personal favourites include tracks by GLASS HEART and BONDAGE FAIRIES…but there’s literally something for everyone here. Go check it out, it’s for a wholesome cause.

Aren’t massacres just the best? They come in a whole assortment of colours, shapes and sizes…Birthday Massacres, Texas Chainsaw Massacres, Slumber Party Massacres, Pizza Girl Massacres… (I could go on, I just had a field day on IMDb) and ooh boy, Columbine was a work of art wasn’t it! (I jest; shooting up children is frowned upon in the UK) However let’s be honest, while alternative music and horror movies may overuse the word to the point it’s almost desensitized, it’s the very real incidents such as Columbine that, capture the most intrigue and make for some of the most fascinating stories. This brings us to today’s band…THE MASSACRE CAVE.

While at first glance the name could very well be taken from yet another low budget slasher movie, The Massacre Cave are in fact a 4-piece alternative metal band from and around The Isle Of Eigg, Scotland. Situated in the Inner Hebrides, Eigg is a small island with an equally small population, but while it lacks in mass…it makes up for in mass murder, and this is where they get their name. According to clan tradition, way back in 1577, around 395 people were suffocated and killed while sheltering from the MacLoed clan inside the Cave Of Frances. The MacLoed’s, seeking revenge following a fall-out, found the islanders in hiding and started fires at the caves entrance, asphyxiating everyone inside, virtually wiping out the islands population. Or so they say. Might be a load of bollocks, who knows?

Anyway, history lesson over, The Massacre Cave (Who consist of guitarists/vocalists Joe and Ben Cormack, bassist Jodie Bremaneson and drummer Pete Colquhoun) originally formed in 2005, quickly becoming recognised within independent circles and within Scottish national tabloids for their intense sound and live shows, especially their breakout single “Behemoth”. Now, in 2020 we find them releasing their brand new album “Godlust” through Red Death Records…Joe sent me an email asking me to check it out…so let’s do just that before they send a clan after me!

The 8-track mini album opens up with “We Own The Sun” and after some gradually built, galloping riffs, we’re met with a wall of assertive percussion, channelling a rich progressive metal aesthetic with the off-kilter, rhythmic yet, technical fret-work. Vocally intense; combining an almost southern groove with guttural growling, making for a tumultuous opening. “From The Mountains” transitions in then nicely and there seems to be a little more structure to the instrumentation; the guitars seem that bit more regimented and disciplined, while vocally it’s as though we’ve taken influence from the likes of early SATYRICON in places. There’s the subtlest hint of black metal adding flavour to the track while still utilising traditional thrash influences, all combining to create that aforementioned progressive sound.

The blackened influences continue on the intro to “Tetramethrin” before the gruff vocals take the track down a more sludge-metal avenue, yet there are glimmers of the likes of Jaz Coleman of KILLING JOKE sprinkled here and there, there’s a fair variety of styles layered throughout these tracks in all honesty, making for an interesting listen. We have a couple of sub-three-minute offerings too starting with “Godfrey”, and it’s no more than a quaint little acoustic-led instrumental, breaking up proceedings nicely I will admit, while “Red Death” capitalises on those early thrash qualities, benefiting from some crisp recording, the solo here too just the cherry on top of quite the enjoyable track.

Finally then we do end up on the title track and again, we have a bountiful blend of genres, styles and sounds that fleet between progressive and traditional metal, ambient yet, avant-garde experimentation. It’s got some great hooks and balances it’s gentler melodies with its more crunching guitar work really well, ending the album on a positive note. Essentially The Massacre Cave tick a variety of boxes and if you enjoy your music somewhere between, say, early OPETH and MASTODON then you may find ample enjoyment over the course of these eight tracks. Despite living in the arse end of nowhere they’ve accumulated a smörgåsbord of influences, resulting in a colourful approach to progressive metal. Now if you’ll excuse me…I have the sudden urge to watch The Descent. [6]

Ah yes; Money Inc...For those of you who don’t know, they are one of the most iconic heel tag teams in professional wrestling from the early 90’s. Consisting of “The Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase and “IRS” Irwin R. Schyster, they won the then WWF tag team championships three times over the period of 1992 to 1993, having beaten the likes of the Legion Of Doom and the Natural Disasters, before eventually disbanding, as wrestling continued to adapt and evolve into a new era trough the mid-nineties. Wait a minute…something’s not quite right here…*checks notes*… for fuck sake Gav (-_-) let’s start again shall we?

MONO INC. for those of you who don’t know, are an alt. rock  / Goth band formed in Germany in 2000 and over the past twenty years have racked up an impressive number of albums and EP’s. The four piece (Currently consisting of vocalist Martin Engler, drummer Katha Mia, guitarist Carl Fornia and bassist Manuel Antoni) have enjoyed a fair bit of homeland success as their previous five albums have all reached the Top 10 in the official German charts, and they hope to continue their run of good form with their brand new album “The Book Of Fire”. Let’s see how quickly we can read this before it’s little more than a smoldering pile of ash…and it better have pictures…

We open up with the seven-minute-plus title track and after a brief piano intro; we practically set sail for high adventure…honestly for a split second I thought I was aboard the Black Pearl swigging rum with Captain Jack Sparrow. This is some piratey shit! The song itself, while a little drawn out in places is up-tempo and incredibly up-beat, it combines that ideology of exploring the seven seas with folk inspired qualities and a rock-based core sound, which while fun and not unpleasant, IS unexpected.  Goths and pirates don’t mix like…do I bury the treasure at the graveyard or scare all the children at the beach? I digress. Follow up track “Louder Than Hell” is the first real album highlight and takes a more traditional musical approach without as much of a gimmick. Rich in melodic guitar and a simple yet commanding rhythmic percussion, it’s got a solid groove amidst subtle power metal qualities and a great hard rock solo, resulting in another entertaining, up-tempo offering.

Lead single then “Warriors” takes a disappointing down-turn in momentum sadly, as we get a slow, sombre orchestral rock ballad with dreary, near monotonous vocals (Chorus aside)…while instrumentally charming in places, it doesn’t do the album too much justice in all honesty. Highlights do however include “Shining Light” which features LACRIMOSA vocalist Tilo Wolff…and it’s a shiny black slab of gothic tinged alt. rock, combining a deeper vocal and harmonic, choir-esque background singing. This is continued with “The Last Crusade” which really ups the ante with it’s incredibly SISTERS OF MERCY inspired intro and slick presentation. This track is infectious as all hell, from the vocal hooks in the chorus to the borderline sexual guitar solo, the book of fire is scorching here. Elsewhere “Right For The Devil”, which features German medieval metal outfit TANZWUT continues a similar standard of simple yet catchy alternative rock…slower in pace maybe but it’s a got a great bass-line and with that comes a certain swagger which is impossible to dislike.

The rest of the album trudges along fairly well without any real complaints, resulting in a solid overall listen, as portions of it will appeal to quite a broad spectrum of alternative music fans. Granted it’s not the all-out Goth-rock record I was expecting, seeing as THE 69 EYES were mentioned in the 'FFO' section of the press-kit, but I can admit I’m not disappointed. “The Book Of Fire” is itself only the latest chapter in Mono Inc.’s storied career to date, and it’s safe to say that these flames aren’t dying anytime soon. A record worth checking out this. [7]

2019 has like most years, been a strong year for new music. It doesn't matter what genre we're talking about; it's been a year of triumphant returns, exploratory and experimental albums and EP's and an overall win for you and me, the consumer. Over the past 12 months, in between changes in my personal life with relationships and employment, undertaking a completely new job with no prior training or background, I've still done my best to keep on top of new music, more specifically my reviews, despite my own mental health which I don't really talk about much. With all of that said, I've still managed to listen to a total of 274 brand new EP's and albums in 2019 and out of all of those, I've managed to whittle down that number to a categorised series of Best Of lists. Ranging from EP's specifically, to pop music, metal and my own personal favourite releases of the year, I've managed to expand my listening experiences and broaden my horizons to allow myself to grow as a reviewer, and these albums sum that up quite well in my opinion. While I've already shared these lists on social media, such as my Twitter ( @GavinJGriffiths ) my Instagram ( @gavthegothicchav ) and my Facebook page ( www.facebook.com/GTGCReviews ) I wanted to give a more in-depth look at my choices for the year, and my individual scoring of each record...essentially doing a Dave Meltzer star-rating system for each individual track. I hope you find my choices interesting, and as usual, I've compiled my official Spotify end of year playlist which I've included at the bottom of this post for your listening pleasure. Here's to 2020 where all of this starts again...until next time...have a happy new year, and, A LITTLE BIT OF THE BUBBLY! 

20] KILO KISH - "Redux" EP - 1.60/5
19] HEAVY LUNGS - "Measure" EP - 1.60/5
18] NAUT - "Semele" EP - 1.66/5
17] INTERPOL - "A Fine Mess" EP 1.80/5
16] POPPY - "Choke" EP - 1.80/5
15] SODOM - "Out Of The Fontline Trench" EP - 1.80/5
14] YUNGBLUD - "The Underrated Youth" EP - 1.83/5
13] BENNY BASSETT - "Words For Yesterday" EP - 1.83/5
12] 8MM - "Heart Shaped Hell" EP - 2.00/5
11] MILEY CYRUS - "She Is Coming" EP - 2.00/5
10] CATHEDRAL IN FLAMES - "Children Of The Blackest Hole" EP - 2.20/5
09] SKYLAR GREY - "Angel With Tattoos" EP - 2.20/5
08] SUN ARCANA - "Just Another Dream Away" EP - 2.20/5
07] PALAYE ROYALE - "Massacre, The New American Dream" EP - 2.25/5
06] YEAR OF THE LOCUST - "Year Of The Locust" EP - 2.25/5
05] RXPTRS - "I" EP - 2.40/5
04] LIL NAS X - "7" EP - 2.50/5
03] HAWTHORN AVENUE - "Wildfire" EP - 2.50/5
02] HER DESPAIR - "Exorcisms Of Eroticism" EP - 2.50/5
01] SOME VILLAINS - "Outliars" EP - 2.75/5

20] P!NK - "Hurts 2 B Human" - 1.53/5
19] BASTILLE - "Doom Days" - 1.54/5
18] TOM WALKER - "What A Time To Be Alive" - 1.57/5
17] BILLIE EILISH - "When We All Fall Asleep Where Do We Go" - 1.57/5
16] EMMA BUNTON - "My Happy Place" - 1.60/5
15] POST MALONE - "Hollywood's Bleeding" - 1.64/5
14] BLACKPINK - "In Your Area" - 1.66/5
13] KERLI - "Shadow Works" - 1.66/5
12] MIKA - "My Name Is Michael Holbrook" - 1.69/5
11] ALICE MERTON - "Mint" - 1.81/5
10] SIGRID - "Sucker Punch" - 1.83/5
09] LEWIS CAPALDI - "Divinely Inspired To A Hellish Extent" - 1.83/5
08] MARINA - "Love + Hate" - 1.87/5
07] DAVE - "Psychodrama" - 1.90/5
06] BUSTED - Half Way There" - 1.90/5
05] WILDWOOD KIN - "Wildwood Kin" - 2.10/5
04] WILL YOUNG - "Lexicon" - 2.16/5
03] JAMES BLUNT - "Once Upon A Mind" - 2.18/5
02] HANTE. - "Fierce" - 2.23/5
01] SCANDROID - "The Light" - 2.28/5

20] KHAIDIAN - "Penumbra" - 2.00/5
19] INCITE - "Built To Destroy" - 2.00/5
18] LEACH - "Hymns For The Hollow" - 2.00/5
17] SWALLOW THE SUN - "When A Shadow Is Forced Into The Light" - 2.00/5
16] HEARTSICK - "Sleep Cycles" - 2.07/5
15] CRYSTAL LAKE - "Helix" - 2.08/5
14] AS I LAY DYING - "Shaped By Fire" - 2.08/5
13] KILLSWITCH ENGAGE - "Atonement" - 2.09/5
12] FALLUJAH - "Undying Light" - 2.10/5
11] AFTERLIFE - "Breaking Point" - 2.10/5
10] THROUGH THE NOISE - "Dualism" - 2.11/5
09] KAAMOS WARRIORS - "Ikuisen Talven Sarastus" - 2.12/5
08] ABIGAIL WILLIAMS - "Walk Beyond The Dark" - 2.14/5
07] AMON AMARTH - "Berzerker" - 2.16/5
06] MEGADETH - "Warheads On Foreheads" - 2.20/5
05] SOILWORK - "Verkligheten" - 2.33/5
04] DEMON HUNTER - "War" - 2.40/5
03] CORRODED - "Bitter" - 2.41/5
02] ROTTING CHRIST - "The Heretics" - 2.41/5
​01] CHILDREN OF BODOM - "Hexed" - 2.45/5

20] RISKEE & THE RIDICULE - "Body Bag Your Scene" - 2.33/5
19] DEMON HUNTER - "Peace" - 2.40/5
18] THE DIRTY YOUTH - "Utopia" - 2.40/5
17] DREAMSTATE - "Primrose Path" - 2.40/5
16] THE WRAITH - "Gloom Ballet" - 2.41/5
15] NORTHLANE - "Alien" - 2.45/5
14] D-A-D - "A Prayer For The Loud" - 2.45/5
13] PAPA ROACH - "Who Do You Trust?" - 2.50/5
12] SUM 41 - "Order In Decline" - 2.50/5
11] IN FLAMES - "I, The Mask" - 2.50/5
10] WHILE SHE SLEEPS - "So What?" - 2.54/5
09] BAD RELIGION - "Age Of Unreason" - 2.57/5
08] LINDEMANN - "F & M" - 2.69/5
07] WEEZER - "Teal Album" - 2.75/5
06] MOTIONLESS IN WHITE - "Disguise" - 2.81/5
05] RAMMSTEIN - "Rammstein" - 2.90/5
04] YONAKA - "Don't Wait 'Til Tomorrow" - 3.00/5
03] LACUNA COIL - "Black Anima" - 3.18/5
02] THE 69 EYES - "West End" - 3.27/5
01] BLAQK AUDIO - "Only Things We Love" - 3.33/5

The last time we caught up with DEMOCRATUS, the South Wales metal conglomerate (Consisting of vocalist Steve Jenkins, guitarists Joey Watkins and Rich Rees, bassist Stu Rake and drummer Zak Skane) had just released their 2018 debut EP “Starting Again”…and it was in all fairness rather apropos. Having formed out of the ashes of their previous collective bands such as COUNTERHOLD and CANNIBAL GOD, the five-piece really were starting again, and truth be told it did them the world of good, as 2018 saw them off to a frankly superb start.

Not only was the EP received well but they managed to bag themselves a slot at Bloodstock Festival courtesy of their coveted Metal To The Masses competition, cementing their status as one’s to watch on the unsigned metal scene (Aided by some determined self-promotion). With their profile rising and with the band finding themselves expanding their live audience venue by venue, it’s perfect timing for them to drop their 2nd EP “Damnation”, to really strike while the iron is hot. The band recently asked me to check it out ahead of its release this December, and I’ll be damned if I don’t!

The EP opens up with “Is This Fear” and immediately we’re swept up in this surging yet harmonious, grand cinematic instrumental intro; we’re literally seconds in and already we find the band’s sound has evolved as they experiment with their approach. It doesn’t take long however before the metal kicks in and once again you can hear a diverse array of influences in their style, ranging from classic melodic metal, to thrash to death-infused, polyrhythmic brutality. It yo-yo’s between the calm and almost carnivorous quite well and the song is well-balanced, kicking this EP off nicely.

Follow up track “BTK” however slows things RIGHT down and the transition is almost jarring. The subdued plucking of guitar strings and restrained percussion is almost creepy as it sets a foreboding tone, until the track comes to life with a more regimented style of death metal. The riffs are semi-sluggish as they chug along with a doom-like sensibility, while the vocal delivery is almost bullet pointed. A totally different approach to our opener but while not as entertaining, it does highlight that diversity in their influences all the more. The title track returns to a more traditional metal approach instrumentally, though retaining a distinct heaviness, while the bulk of the vocals stick to guttural growling, chorus aside (Especially that impressive note Steve hits at the tracks climax), and you can hear the bands admiration for the likes of AMON AMARTH and INSOMNIUM. Finally then, closing track “Dead Without Dying” rounds things up with another weighted, borderline somnolent display of riffs that’s sadly more than a little anti-climactic.

What’s clear is that the band are unafraid to try to concoct their own brand of melodic death metal, still dabbling in an array of genres, still finding room to experiment a little more. The trouble however in doing that is Democratus are still seemingly trying to find their identity. There ARE more signs here that they are in fact heading more down the route of heavier, death-inspired metal; this EP seems angrier in presentation and delivery, but they aren’t 100% there yet. As with their debut, the weakest aspects really are the cleaner vocals and to be fair they’ve restricted that aspect of their sound here, with less power metal vocalisation, and really that suits them a lot more. With the bands profile growing show by show, coupled with the bands passion and determination, Democratus are absolutely on the right path and making all the right steps, but this path is a long and winding one, and their journey has only just begun. [6]

So what’s YOUR favourite type of knot? Is it a Half Hitch? Perhaps a Bowline or a Sheet Bend? Of course not, we all know its SLIPKNOT, and with bloody good reason! The Iowan nonet started life in the mid-to-late 90’s and from day one they practically turned the world on its head, over time becoming arguably the biggest modern metal band on the planet. Between the mystery of their masked persona’s and the brutality of their early crossover genre-mashing, it didn’t take them long to get noticed, and they helped revolutionise alternative music as we know it. Sure, there have been trials and tribulations along the way, but the band have always bounced back stronger than ever…proven emphatically on their last album; 2014’s “.5: The Gray Chapter”.

Following the death of bassist Paul Gray, the band found themselves in purgatory, and the resulting album was both the closure of one chapter of Slipknot, a nod to Paul and an appreciation of everything preceding it, but also the beginning of a new era; a rebirth, and all signs pointed towards a brutal, unrelenting future. What exactly did that future have in store? Well aside from keeping things ticking over with festival appearances and a live album, the band did initially return in 2018 with a rare stand-alone single “All Out Life”, reminding fans that they were still very much active creatively, with the track itself acting as a rallying cry, encouraging everyone to live in the now and not dwell on the past. This only got fans excited for what was to come…and what came was this; “We Are Not Your Kind”. What direction were Slipknot heading in in this new chapter of their storied career? I challenge you to all-out fucking listen with me…

We open up with “Insert Coin” and we’re greeted with a strangely ominous intro-track fuelled by semi-retro arcade style synths that meander gently, as the instrumentation washes over you with a calming motion. It’s as though we’re on the title screen here getting ready to press play and dive into this brand new game as Corey says in a chilling manner “I’m counting all the killers..” and it’s an interesting start. First track proper then “Unsainted” gets the album underway properly and what an opener…from the initially haunting children’s choir it gradually builds in atmosphere and intensity until it explodes into a frenzy of blistering vocals with pummelling riffs and percussion. It carries on from the previous album in terms of delivery; blending visceral verses with a clean, hook-rich chorus. It’s a powerful track.

From here on in however, the album gets VERY interesting…recent single “Birth Of The Cruel” slows things down with a more methodical riff and plenty of tinny percussion. Vocally clean for the most part until Corey lets rip during the chorus segments, countered by Sid Wilson’s trademark scratching harking back to the bands earlier days. “Death Because Of Death” is our first interlude and takes on an almost hypnotic tribal tone; simple and repetitive before transitioning  straight into “Nero Forte”, instantly waking up the listener with more classic Slipknot riffs and up-tempo lyricism, again bridging the gap between the now and the bands early years. Another album highlight, “Critical Darling”, continues on with the “…Gray Chapter” aesthetic with plenty of key-changes, vocal switch-up techniques and allows for a variety of sensations, fluctuating effortlessly between harsh and harmonious.

​This fluctuation is a reoccurring theme throughout the whole album in all honesty; it zigs where you think it’ll zag and vice versa…”Red Flag” is a traditionally blistering onslaught, fuelled by a frantic pacing and old-school aesthetic, again harking back to the Knot’s earlier days, while interlude “What’s Next” comes across as actual elevator music! Like, seriously lads what the fuck is next? Where else can you take this? “Spiders” houses an almost Halloween-esque piano lead allowing for a generally creepier vibe, bordering on polyrhythmic in places; it’s got a subtle prog delivery, before we eventually end on promotional single “Solway Firth”. Coming full circle from the intro, we count all the killers over a typically bombastic masked-metal approach that bridges gaps between modern era and the “…Subliminal Verses” days.

Ultimately what can be said about the Iowan’ nine in 2019? Their groove-heavy, pulverising metal is still there in abundance and coupled with their nu-metal origins, thrash sensibilities and Corey’s ability to deliver a mainstream alternative anthem, Slipknot are as Slipknot as ever here but MORE. There are no real definitive hits like “Dead Memories” or “Snuff” to appeal to the wider audience…fuck no; if anything they’ve gone the opposite direction. Sure there are some great hooks throughout this record, but the presentation here showcases so much experimentation and a lack of fucks given this is arguably Slipknot’s most prog-metal album to date. It doesn’t settle for a style, not even Slipknot’s own, and that’s where it deserves praise. We all know Slipknot can and will deliver, it’s practically a given these days, but they still opted to tear up their own rule-book and go crazy. “We Are Not Your Kind” is a metaphorical middle finger to not only the fans that just want Iowa 2.0, but also metal in general. It might be more experimental to what you are used to from the Clown and co…but fuck me this is a Slipknot album and a half. Insert another coin mate, I want another go at this…[7]

Whenever an artist, PR company or record label forwards me some new music to check out, I’m always interested to see what part of the world it comes from. Often I’ve mentioned certain parts of the world being affiliated with certain scenes or styles musically, but it’s always nice to find diversity from within a town, city or general region…and today’s review highlights just that. Lund, Sweden, may not be a destination that jumps out at you as being instantly recognisable, but for any fellow Eurovision fans out there you may know that it the home of one MÅNS ZELMERLÖW, and while I would more than happily listen to Sweden’s answer to JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE for this review, we won’t be covering any pop music for now. “Thank fuck” I can already hear you say…

Lund also happens to be the home of a band by the name of THROUGH THE NOISE, and the team over at Eclipse Records forwarded me their latest album “Dualism” to check out. The five-piece (Consisting of vocalist Jowl Nyberg, guitarists Victor Adonis and Marcus Skantz, bassist Martin Lingonblad and drummer Peter Liwgren) were founded back in 2010, and in the years that followed they established themselves as more than promising up-and-comers within Sweden’s thriving metal community, especially with their 2015 debut “Fall Of Gaia”, but now in 2019 they want to well and truly stamp their name among the metalcore elite and hope to do so with these nine new tracks. Hellfire Magazine summed things up by describing the album as having ‘Interesting, surprisingly well-functioning songs’…back handed compliment and a half that! Consider me intrigued!

We open up with a track called “Shattered” and the virtually instant impact of hard hitting chords, with the duel pummelling of riffs and percussion gives this an intense start! It’s bass-heavy and subtly down-tuned but doesn’t compromise whatsoever when it comes to delivering a harsh dose of surging metal. To a degree you could say it bridges a gap between the likes of ATREYU and CHILDREN OF BODOM, but however you look at it; it doesn’t give a fuck…it just mauls. Early album highlight “Psychomachia” follows up next and we’re joined by guest vocalist Jahna Lund of DEATH BY HORSE fame. For the most part it’s more generally expected metalcore, teetering on generic with its methodical chugging and breakdown-inspired stylistics, but the clean vocals provided by Jahna allow for more melody to flow through the chorus and it’s all balanced very well.

A lot of the album does stick to a firm metalcore/deathcore formula for the most part but it does have more than a couple of points of worth. “House Of Asterion” combines up-tempo post-hardcore with subtle thrash and death elements resulting in an incredibly frenetic listen. “Secret Project” houses a touch more melodic instrumentation, with Jahna again providing backing gang-vocal harmony…the nods to Swedish heavyweights IN FLAMES are proudly on display here. Let’s be honest mind OF COURSE they were going to have a bit of In Flames in them, they’re a Swedish metal band for fuck sake! “Maktbegär” retains all of the pace and again, pummels the listener with a fine slab of scando-death-punk not too unlike the likes of KVELERTAK and MAN THE MACHETES in places, while “Meaning Through Noise” takes on an almost industrial tone, akin to the likes of STATIC-X.

Overall, while not exactly original, bearing in mind recent musical trends and the fact they come from one of the most saturated areas on the planet when it comes to alternative metal, Through The Noise have still managed to deliver a crisp and enjoyable metalcore album. The brief crossover portions work well and they’ve added enough flavour to ensure they don’t blend into genre obscurity like Homer Simpson walking backwards into a hedge row. Put Through The Noise through your speakers, as this album is certainly worth a listen. [7]

There are many important questions in life…like, what came first; the chicken or the egg? What colour would Michael Jackson pick playing chess? (I jest, we know it doesn’t matter if your black or white) How much wood would a wood-chuck chuck if a wood-chuck was Chuck Norris? But even more important than all of that…who is the biggest metal band in the world? Immediately I can envisage swarms of you arguing over METALLICA and IRON MAIDEN, and to be fair they’re great shouts, but here I’m going to throw another, more than credible, and definitely deserving band into the mix; RAMMSTEIN.

These German industrial-metal titans originally formed in 1994 and ever since, all they’ve done is (Without trying to put a Nazi spin on this) conquered the world one arena, one stadium at a time. From their intense, eyebrow raising cover of DEPECHE MODE’s “Stripped”, to the beautifully haunting “Sonne”, right up the gloriously R-Rated “Pussy”, Till Lindemann and the lads have never shied away from controversy, and this can also be said for their live shows. Whether it’s boiling poor keyboardist Flake alive in a cauldron, ejaculating spectacularly into the audience via a giant mechanical penis, or generally just their unfathomable amount of pyrotechnics, Rammstein put on one of if not THE best live metal shows on the planet, and with their new technically untitled album, things are only getting bigger. With that said…let’s get ready to abuse Google-translate as we check out “Rammstein”.

We open up with “Deutschland” and in gloriously typical Rammer’s fashion; their first new track in a decade is an ode to Germany. Well, to a degree. From the steady rise in intensity of the frenetic synths, to the jolting riffs, to the eventual anthemic, regimented metal flurry, it simply excites from its very first chords. Lyrically plodding for the most part, but musically this is just captivating…it’s so good to have them back and this is a classic start. Following this then is the album’s first major highlight “Radio”…again; we start things off with some bouncing synths, before we get some traditionally crunching riffs. The balance here between the electronica, which, reminds me of old-school Moogs, and the hard rock is perfect and it’s an up-tempo little number with a seriously addictive chorus. Coming back to the topic of controversy, the track touches upon Nazi propaganda by means of censorship during the 30’s and 40’s. German citizens were subject to strict control of what they had access to during the time and here they touch upon that.

The first half of this album is quite heavy on the electronic front if I’m honest, with "Ausländer" being another stand-out track. Another up-beat offering bordering on dance-inspired, the techno elements are pulsing, while the track pounds away in a well delivered crossover style. Essentially meaning ‘foreigner’, lyrically it’s very ‘Jack The Lad’ as he sings of being a man of the world and a ladies man, heavily insinuating a sense of promiscuity. Speaking of which…”Sex” I guess you could say comes (Behave) right afterwards. More chilling synths followed by a groove-rich, almost southern-metal guitar tone and yet another brilliantly catchy chorus, it’s all about fiery passion and giving in to lust…however it’s no “Pussy”.

The second half of the album does admittedly slow down a touch but it certainly retains its talking points…none more so than “Puppe”. A dark yet equally wonderful and interesting track that’s based on an old poem; meaning ‘Doll’, it’s all hushed and subdued as Till sings of the prostitution of a sister character, while their younger sibling in care is forced to hear everything from the room next door, before the track erupts into an angry, scathing barrage of vocals, the result of a seemingly troubled upbringing. It’s a powerful track! “Tattoo” is another hard-rocking number that touches upon the duality that is the pleasure and the pain of self-expression, before “Hallomann” rounds things up in a frankly quite creepy manner. Remember when your mum and dad told you not to talk to strangers? At least I hope they did…but yeah this song reinforces that notion! Singing about picking up a little girl; no talking, just get in…presumably the van? One can assume sweets were offered? Promises of trips to the seaside, wanting her to sing and dance…this is all very questionable but still another deeply interesting track. I might be reading into it completely wrong for all I know…maybe Rammstein took Madeleine McCann? Ok I’m joking naturally, but it’s an odd one. Regardless, what we have here is an album that may have been ten years in the making, but oh how the time-off has played into Rammsteins favour; they sound fresh as a daisy. The weight of the guitars, the chilling synths, the dark lyricism…Rammstein are still unafraid to push buttons yet they continue to pull in bigger and bigger crowds. An outstanding come-back this…TO DEUTSCHLAND! [8]

Without trying to come across as that meme of Morpheus from The Matrix, what if I told you…that you could have a black metal band without the corpse paint, church burning and, let’s not be forgetting the murder of fellow band members?  Well funnily enough that’s exactly what Minnesota quintet ASHBRINGER would like you to believe!

Founded in 2015 by vocalist / guitarist Nick Stanger (Later completed by drummer Ian Sutherland, bassist Nathan Wallestad, guitarist Jackson Catton and keyboardist Cormac Piper) it didn’t take the atmospheric black metal outfit long to get the ball rolling AT ALL, as literally within days of forming, they found themselves working with Avantgarde Music and on their first US tour supporting AMIENSUS. Talk about going in at the deep end! Now, in 2019, we find Ashbringer releasing album number three; “Absolution”, their debut for the very respectable Prosthetic Records. The question is, are they truly free from all guilt and punishment?

At over an hour long, yet only consisting of eight tracks, we’re given an early indication of how this album is going to pan out, but the opening title-track provides an early surprise. With some quaintly plucked acoustic guitar, we’re off to a far mellower start than anticipated! This is eventually countered however by some seriously jarring vocals and though an interesting combination, it isn’t necessarily a pleasant one, however instrumentally it’s incredibly soothing and harmonious. The solo works really well too, and it’s a fine start. “Wilderness Walk” virtually continues in the same vain structurally, before the album begins to dissipate through its own indulgence. “Eternal Separation” Parts one and two indeed last an eternity with their prog-infused presentation, while “Dreamscape” at over ten minutes, with its reverberation  and vacant tones is enough to put even Freddy Krueger to sleep.

​Ultimately while both ambitious and clearly talented musicians, there’s something that doesn’t quite gel with the merger of such harsh vocals and melodious instrumentation. As a progressive / shoegaze record this works really well, especially instrumentally, however vocally it would be interesting to see what the likes of say, Chino Moreno of DEFTONES or Aaron Weiss of MEWITHOUTYOU could do with these tracks, but this doesn’t quite click. “Absolution” isn’t an absolute failure per se, but it isn’t absolutely fabulous either darling. [5]

When it comes to Greece, aside from being an immensely popular Mediterranean tourist destination, little is known about the countries musical culture from an alternative perspective. Sure in the past I’ve covered artists such as SADDOLLS, who fly the flag for gothic rock equally wonderfully and woefully, and more recently, black metal artists such as ROTTING CHRIST, but, who else could you associate alternative music to Greece with?  GUS G is arguably the biggest name given his catalogue of work and collaborations…VANGELIS? He IS a celebrated and critically acclaimed composer and progressive electronic artist, but he doesn’t REALLY count…what about Meteora? LINKIN PARK named an album after the place? OK, fine I’m clutching at straws! It’s safe to say that, unless you really dig, Greece isn’t a country renowned for its rock and metal…but that’s where today’s band comes in.

Yes today we’re going to be talking about a ‘band’ by the name of SIXSTRINGNOISE, who got in touch with me not too long ago via email, so before I get into things I’d like to say Σας ευχαριστώ που έρθετε σε επαφή! Formed in 2010 by founding (And currently sole member) Markos 6SN, it didn’t take long after his digital debut “Snowing Bullets While Kissing The Ground” for him to want to hit the stage and perform live, recruiting Alex D and Alex B (Drummer and bassist respectively) in 2011. With a penchant for hard rock and metal, they toured up and down Greece, establishing themselves as hot local talent in the Athens area, but after a couple of releases, we find them back down to just Markos as he releases album number four in 2019. The question is, just how noisy can one guitarist be? Let’s find out as we listen to “Relics”…

The album opens up with “How’s The World From Up There?” and we’re immediately met with some simple yet melodic riffs, before switching in some subtle prog-rock elements as it transitions through certain rhythmic variations. The chorus here is bold and soaring, with further key changes giving off an almost power-ballad vibe amidst the hard rock, but vocally at times it sounds more like a demo-quality recording which brings the track down a touch. Instrumentally fine, there’s some solid guitar work here but the vocals could probably be mixed and produced a little better…although it’s a decent opener regardless. “True Colours” keeps the riffs coming hard and heavy with a more metal inspired influence shining through musically; guitar solo included. In ways this pays ample homage to bands like ALTER BRIDGE in its delivery and overall sound; you can easily hear the likes of Myles Kennedy in this track inspirationally and again it’s a decent listen.

It isn’t all about the balls-out rock and roll with Markos mind you, as he’s able to mix things up here and there for a more diverse listening experience…”Underdog” in particular has a wonderfully relaxed country-rock vibe. He still incorporates some impassioned electric guitar but overall it’s a welcome change of pace. “The Old You” goes one step further by stripping back completely to an acoustic ballad and it’s really quite the emotive little track, and an album highlight to boot. The soft croon of the vocals here sounding better and it’s a proper lighters in the air track this, lovely stuff. Further highlights include “None Of Your Business” which while once more picking up the pace and aggression delivers all of the hooks and makes for a catchy hard rock number, with it's simple yet effective chorus. Sometimes all it takes is a great chorus and you’re invested; this is one of those times. Ignore the rest of the track, just, enjoy this chorus.

There are a couple of lesser moments, naturally, and mainly we find them mid-album. “Crack A Smile” houses more of that prog-inspired instrumentation and structure with a touch of fret-wankery thrown in for good measure, while “What’s Wrong With You?” has quite a repetitive chorus and poor gang vocals, honestly they sound like pub-level  karaoke at times…to answer your question Markos, what the fuck is wrong with me? Well right now I’m listening to this song…that’s what. We finish up then on the title track and it’s intro instantly reminds me of A FLOCK OF SEAGULLS but sadly there’s no synth-pop to be found in this instance…instead we’re given a dramatic, metal inspired track with deep riffs and a methodical, militant tempo, almost combining those Alter Bridge influences with a slight middle eastern flavour. It’s not a bad track but it is a slow burner, ending the album on a slightly damp note. It’s safe to say that, SixStringNoise can’t be done for false advertising…Markos plays the guitar, and he makes some noise…which is all well and good, but is the noise worth listening to? Sure there are some genuinely interesting moments dotted throughout these ten tracks and there is definitely promise and potential, but sadly at times the vocal production side of things let’s this album down. That’s not to dismiss this entirely though…I honestly hope Markos continues to make all of the noise and helps encourage an alternative music scene in and around Athens. We could market a new wave of Greek rock…we could call it; Grock…I’m a fucking genius. [6]