IT’S BOSS TIME!!!!! No, don’t worry, my name isn’t Michael Cole and I’m not about to run commentary on WWE’s Sasha Banks (Though in hindsight that may have been a little more entertaining to be honest)…but we are of course going to be focusing our attention on the boss himself; Mr BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN. The man needs little to no introduction; one of the most successful recording artists of all time, Springsteen’s career spans decades and he has the hits and accolades to show for it. EVERYONE knows classics such as 1975’s “Born To Run”, even up to his critically acclaimed track “The Wrestler” in 2009, but now, ten years later in 2019, at the sprightly age of 69 we find The Boss still churning out records…

Not taking into account his plethora of live recordings and EP’s, Springsteen recently released his nineteenth studio album entitled “Western Stars”. A return to his solo recording style, firmly based around story-telling with orchestral arrangements, and in this instance, inspired by 70’s Californian pop music. With a rich range of themes based on American tropes such as lonely highways, and the feelings of isolation travelling vast desert spaces through the US, let’s check it out and see if this bona fide western star can still shine so far into his career...

​We open up with “Hitch Hikin’” and let it be said in advance that, the name sums up the journey through this album really quite appropriately; a seemingly endless wait for something to come and pick you up with no real guarantees. With its softly plucked acoustic yet, tinny guitar, it’s got an almost southern blue-grass aesthetic filtering in ever so slightly, before an elegant, sweeping string section gives the track more instrumental depth. Everything is soothing but here Springsteen’s voice comes across as occasionally monotonous. While a lot of this record is generally stripped back and mellow, there are a couple of points of interest worth highlighting…lead single “Hello Sunshine”  houses a tranquil, almost tropical guitar tone while more delicate strings meander through your ears. Despite its down-tempo approach and low-key vibe it’s still a positive little song and you can’t help but feel relaxed having listened to it.

“Sundown” despite its livelier tone, incorporating subtle blues elements and a more powerful vocal performance tells a sad tale of solitude and loneliness, spending the nights alone drifting from bar to bar, missing the one he holds dearest in his heart. The real album highlight however comes courtesy of “Sleepy Joe’s Café”…far more up-beat and jovial, it’s anything but sleepy as it utilises an old-school rock ‘n’ roll feel, coupled with organs and a brass accompaniment ; it’s a genuinely fun, light-hearted little track. Sadly, the rest of the album, despite Springsteen’s narrative and penchant for story-telling within his songs, comes across as a tad lifeless for the most part.

“Drive Fast (The Stuntman)” for example, despite admittedly being composed beautifully, exudes nowhere near the level of energy you’d expect given its name, leaving you somewhat disappointed. You hope for something zestful, something bold and boisterous, yet it’s everything but. “Chasin’ Wild Horses” suffers from the same issues; the title portrays something maybe a touch chaotic, but honestly he couldn’t catch a bloody cold here let alone a wild horse, before luckily, we eventually finish up at “Moonlight Motel”. Given the general pacing of the album overall, it’s both fitting from the point of the albums narrative, and ironic as having listened to the album from start to finish, you could do with putting your head down for a couple of hours. Springsteen can obviously still weave wonderful stories and concepts into his song writing, and musically there’s nothing really wrong with these tracks at all, the orchestral elements especially sound lovely, but it’s a very restrained record that struggles to warrant many repeat listens. If you prefer your music to be more easy-listening then sure you may enjoy this a lot more, but on this occasion it would appear that the boss has taken some annual leave…[4]

“I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do…and for the people who DO like country music, 'denigrate' means 'put down.'” – Bob Newhart. All jokes aside, country music isn’t something we hear a lot of in the UK, and by a lot of I mean, virtually any; it’s just not a thing. We’ve got plenty of talented singer/songwriters, but country music to us is a very American thing…a very, cowboy hat wearing, moonshine drinking, horse-riding, rootin’ tootin’ arguably inbred (If you’re down South at least) American thing.

That’s not to say that it’s all bad however, no sirree, as I’m sure everyone can agree that the likes of JOHNNY CASH and TAMMY WYNETTE are iconic performers, and they, like so many others helped take country music off of the front porch into packed out concert halls across the states. Although, while the UK doesn’t have a flourishing country scene, we do have artists that take influence from the genre and that leads us into today’s review; let me introduce you to HAWTHORN AVENUE.

The duo from Neath (Consisting of Marcus Gumms and Laura Benjamin) initially met in 2015 while both playing the South Wales live circuit and immediately gravitated toward each other creatively, starting out at jam nights where they found their feet in terms of collaborating. Laura, a multi-instrumentalist grew up loving music from a young age and looks up to the likes of TAYLOR SWIFT and CARRIE UNDERWOOD, while Marcus admits he just saw some guy on Stars In Their Eyes doing Johnny Cash and thought to himself ‘That’s what I’m going to do’…and he did! The duo have recently released their debut EP entitled “Wildfire” and have asked me to check it out…I guess it’s time to saddle up…

The EP opens up with “Raised Me Better” and it combines subtle organ notes with soft country blues and a crisp pop aesthetic…with its vocal harmonies, powerful key-changes yet an easy-listening approach, it delivers a wonderfully smooth, simplistic country-pop number. Hick-pop if you will. The songs message of restraint and composure allows for a positive outlook and sets a good example; be the better person, and it’s really quite lovely; a good start this. “Fade Away” strips things right back to a gently plucked acoustic-driven piece with subtle nods to a Native American woodwind influence. It’s a hushed, mellow little track with an emotive delivery, though picks up ever so slightly over time, incorporating more electric guitar and growing in volume and intensity, yet manages to stay restrained.

“The Water’s Edge” follows in the same vein with another sombre country ballad; with its sweet, delicate acoustics and silky vocal harmonies…it’s a quaint little track but out of the four presented here, it’s arguably the weakest of the bunch, though you can appreciate its tenderness. We do however finish on a strong note and the EP’s title track is a clear EP highlight in every sense of the term. “Wildfire” returns to a more up-beat presentation blending their love of country stylistics with a more modern indie-pop tone and the resulting track is full of sass, swagger and rhythm. The tinny guitar, dual vocal harmonies and a fantastically hook-laden, melodic chorus means this song is impossible to not enjoy, and it bookends this EP perfectly. Country may not be all too lucrative within the UK market, but here Hawthorn Avenue prove that you can utilise that distinct country style to great effect when blended in with a more modern, pop-oriented sound. After listening to this, I really hope this wildfire spreads…god that sounds terrible doesn’t it…[8]

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So I’ve got this confession to make…no I’m not coming out as a heterosexual white male that uses an online platform to give a personal opinion why; that would be career suicide! I jest…my confession is with regards to my approach to music. Sure, whether it’s here or for other publications, my reviews are always from an open-minded, honest perspective, trying to take into account more than just my own personal preferences for whichever artist I may be dealing with…but it doesn’t stop me having those personal preferences. For instance, I’ll go on record now for saying that, in my opinion, NIRVANA are a pile of shit…many would disagree, Courtney Love might try to set me up on a date with a Remington Model-11 for saying such a thing, but while I CAN admit they are an incredibly important and influential band in the evolution of alternative music…I just don’t like them.

This brings me to today’s band; BUCKCHERRY. The Californian rockers have been going for quite some time now and, I first heard of them back in 2001 when I discovered a track called “Slammin’”. It was a great, rock ‘n’ roll track and even though I was more concerned about Nu Metal at the time, I still enjoyed it for what it was. Fast forward a couple of years however, and I’m reintroduced to Buckcherry, as we come to arguably one of the worst successful rock songs ever recorded; “Crazy Bitch”. Seriously this song is 100% cringe in every conceivable way…everyone gives NICKELBACK a hard time when this fucking song exists, what are we doing like?! It’s AWFUL. Anyway needless to say, I was put off Buckcherry…I can’t be dealing with that, nope, no Sir, no thank you. BUT, in the interest of equality (And the fact that you chose them on my last readers choice poll you evil bunch of bastards) I’m going to give them another chance…earlier this year they released album number eight; “Warpaint”, and I’m on the front line prepared to do battle…come at me brah!

The album opens up with the title track and to be perfectly honest; it’s really not bad. It keeps things nice and simple to be fair, incorporating blues-based hard rock with a southern groove and some sleek guitar licks. The solo blends in well allowing the track to flow really smoothly without sounding jarring, it’s not been thrown in the mix ‘just because’ like some solo’s, actually adding to the track, and Josh Todd’s vocals while still distinct, are a touch subdued here, giving off a mellower vibe. It’s actually a decent little opener. If you do prefer mellow, “Right Now” initially has you covered as it continues with the light blues rock inspired guitar tone but strips back to a more acoustic-based delivery, although the chorus is far livelier and, remember what I said about solo’s? Yep…this one came out of nowhere quicker than you can say Randy Orton, and the song can’t seem to decide what it wants to be.

Let’s try and remain objectively positive though shall we and look at the highlights…”No Regrets” is a quirky little up-beat punk-rock inspired piece; it’s fun, it’s light-hearted and you can’t not enjoy this…from the clap-along segments, the tinny, rockabilly guitar stylistics and general skater-rock vibe, it’s just a happy track and at under 3-minutes, it’s an easy highlight. Closing track “The Devil’s In The Details” remains up-beat but returns to a more straightforward hard rocking / classic rock ‘n’ roll aesthetic with a fine riff carrying the track. “The Vacuum” raises a chuckle from me to be honest as in a funny twist of irony, it doesn’t completely suck. The riffs are solid and there’s an enjoyable melody layered throughout the track, resulting in quite an emotive listen, especially with Josh again holding back vocally, but the real highlight and frankly surprising inclusion here is a cover of NINE INCH NAILS classic “Head Like A Hole”.  Granted it’s not the same seething, industrial behemoth crafted by the vitriolic Trent Reznor, but the bass-heavy riffs still sound powerful here and it’s a great choice of cover; it’s a quality track to be fair and it’s done justice.  Is it as good as MILEY CYRUS’ cover on Black Mirror though?  I’ll let you reach your own conclusions there…

The rest of the album simply plods along really quite anonymously to be perfectly honest. “Radio Song” is a clichéd little acoustic piece with rich string-sections clearly aimed at finding commercial airplay while being both incredibly self-aware and  taking a subtle swipe at the mainstream, while “The Alarm” isn’t going to be waking anyone up in a hurry. Its’ slow pace and generally lethargic instrumentation makes for a predominantly boring listen, while Josh’s vocals come across as too much for the pace of the track at times, he’s shouting over it almost and it’s a bit off. Overall though I have to admit, it’s not a terrible album, not by any means…”Crazy Bitch” was quite a while ago now and I can’t hold on to these grudges forever, and while I do still hate that song with a burning passion, this album is fine, they seemed to have calmed down a bit, which I’m all for. I mean, just think, Josh Todd could have done something ridiculous like, release a god-awful, embarrassing rap-rock/dub album, undoing any and all regained credibility I’ve just found in the band, couldn’t he! Wait…what? Who are SPRAYGUN WAR? Oh for fuck’s sake…[6]

What do you get, when you combine a love of classical prog-rock, centuries old medieval mythology and a generous portion of haggis, neeps and tatties? Aside from one incredibly psychedelic episode of Ready Steady Cook, it stereotypically brings us to today’s band; let me introduce you to CULANN. The unsigned five-piece (Consisting of vocalist/guitarist PJ Kelly, drummer Sean Kelly, guitarist Greg Irish, bassist Calum Davies plus Ross McCluskie on the keys) formed in Irvine, Scotland several years ago and made quite the initial impact on the Scottish rock scene! With praise from several regional radio stations following their 2012 self-titled debut, they found themselves winning the ‘Best Rock’ category at the 2013 SAMA’s (Scottish Alternative Music Awards) and have been growing ever since. Appropriately named after an ancient Celtic/Gaelic smithy, it’s fitting that they’ve already forged their anticipated follow-up album “The Great Ecumene”…and the lads have asked me to give it a listen! So let’s crack open the Irn-Bru and check it out!

The album opens up with “Evonium” and once again the band highlights their appreciation and interest in history, stories of old and Celtic heritage, as the word is the name of a purported ancient city, which is said to have stood where Irvine is now. The track itself is initially really quite jovial and up-beat, combining light riffs, subtle poly-rhythms and a bright, bubbly piano lead, while vocally PJ harbours a clean, emotive indie-rock tone. The swift key-changes and solo flurry emphasise the bands love of prog however, and it all combines to create one genuinely interesting track. “Event Without Experience” follows up and while continuing with the up-tempo approach they’ve opted for a more guitar-driven track here; it’s sounding that much grittier and ever so slightly more chaotic, though it’s not heavy.

The first real album highlight however comes courtesy of “Brewing Of Ale” (Of course I like the track that in some way shape or form involves alcohol)…starting life as a sweet little acoustic number it soon evolves into a fully-fledged folk-rock ballad, and although still housing those prog-elements it’s the folk qualities that shine through, especially with the prominence of the Scottish accent here; it’s delivered wonderfully. “All Reverie” continues the feel-good factor with a more simplified, melodic pop-rock number and it’s just an enjoyable, easy-listening effort, which can also be said for “Aegis”. Generally more of the same; but ever so slightly more pop-punk in tone, giving it that ever so subtle edge…it’s another stand-out track.

There are some solid funk-elements incorporated into “Man Alive” adding extra flavour to their fundamentally prog-approach but that, along with the solo and the seven minute plus run time, means this one does come across as a little indulgent in places. The title track practically echoes its own name; essentially describing the entire known inhabited land mass, meaning Ecumene sadly seems to go on forever, sounding mostly sluggish throughout, before we eventually finish up doing a bit of shopping back in Cardiff. I jest; “Queen Street” closes proceedings with another folk-inspired acoustic-led ballad…quaint but anti-climactic. Overall mind you, it’s easy to see why Culann hit the ground running following their formation; with a knack for a clean melody, lyrical storytelling and well-executed instrumentation, it certainly seems unjust that they’re still currently unsigned.  Prog-rock IS more of an acquired taste, just like the aforementioned haggis, but it’s certainly worth a try…[6]

When it comes to Greece, aside from being an immensely popular Mediterranean tourist destination, little is known about the countries musical culture from an alternative perspective. Sure in the past I’ve covered artists such as SADDOLLS, who fly the flag for gothic rock equally wonderfully and woefully, and more recently, black metal artists such as ROTTING CHRIST, but, who else could you associate alternative music to Greece with?  GUS G is arguably the biggest name given his catalogue of work and collaborations…VANGELIS? He IS a celebrated and critically acclaimed composer and progressive electronic artist, but he doesn’t REALLY count…what about Meteora? LINKIN PARK named an album after the place? OK, fine I’m clutching at straws! It’s safe to say that, unless you really dig, Greece isn’t a country renowned for its rock and metal…but that’s where today’s band comes in.

Yes today we’re going to be talking about a ‘band’ by the name of SIXSTRINGNOISE, who got in touch with me not too long ago via email, so before I get into things I’d like to say Σας ευχαριστώ που έρθετε σε επαφή! Formed in 2010 by founding (And currently sole member) Markos 6SN, it didn’t take long after his digital debut “Snowing Bullets While Kissing The Ground” for him to want to hit the stage and perform live, recruiting Alex D and Alex B (Drummer and bassist respectively) in 2011. With a penchant for hard rock and metal, they toured up and down Greece, establishing themselves as hot local talent in the Athens area, but after a couple of releases, we find them back down to just Markos as he releases album number four in 2019. The question is, just how noisy can one guitarist be? Let’s find out as we listen to “Relics”…

The album opens up with “How’s The World From Up There?” and we’re immediately met with some simple yet melodic riffs, before switching in some subtle prog-rock elements as it transitions through certain rhythmic variations. The chorus here is bold and soaring, with further key changes giving off an almost power-ballad vibe amidst the hard rock, but vocally at times it sounds more like a demo-quality recording which brings the track down a touch. Instrumentally fine, there’s some solid guitar work here but the vocals could probably be mixed and produced a little better…although it’s a decent opener regardless. “True Colours” keeps the riffs coming hard and heavy with a more metal inspired influence shining through musically; guitar solo included. In ways this pays ample homage to bands like ALTER BRIDGE in its delivery and overall sound; you can easily hear the likes of Myles Kennedy in this track inspirationally and again it’s a decent listen.

It isn’t all about the balls-out rock and roll with Markos mind you, as he’s able to mix things up here and there for a more diverse listening experience…”Underdog” in particular has a wonderfully relaxed country-rock vibe. He still incorporates some impassioned electric guitar but overall it’s a welcome change of pace. “The Old You” goes one step further by stripping back completely to an acoustic ballad and it’s really quite the emotive little track, and an album highlight to boot. The soft croon of the vocals here sounding better and it’s a proper lighters in the air track this, lovely stuff. Further highlights include “None Of Your Business” which while once more picking up the pace and aggression delivers all of the hooks and makes for a catchy hard rock number, with it's simple yet effective chorus. Sometimes all it takes is a great chorus and you’re invested; this is one of those times. Ignore the rest of the track, just, enjoy this chorus.

There are a couple of lesser moments, naturally, and mainly we find them mid-album. “Crack A Smile” houses more of that prog-inspired instrumentation and structure with a touch of fret-wankery thrown in for good measure, while “What’s Wrong With You?” has quite a repetitive chorus and poor gang vocals, honestly they sound like pub-level  karaoke at times…to answer your question Markos, what the fuck is wrong with me? Well right now I’m listening to this song…that’s what. We finish up then on the title track and it’s intro instantly reminds me of A FLOCK OF SEAGULLS but sadly there’s no synth-pop to be found in this instance…instead we’re given a dramatic, metal inspired track with deep riffs and a methodical, militant tempo, almost combining those Alter Bridge influences with a slight middle eastern flavour. It’s not a bad track but it is a slow burner, ending the album on a slightly damp note. It’s safe to say that, SixStringNoise can’t be done for false advertising…Markos plays the guitar, and he makes some noise…which is all well and good, but is the noise worth listening to? Sure there are some genuinely interesting moments dotted throughout these ten tracks and there is definitely promise and potential, but sadly at times the vocal production side of things let’s this album down. That’s not to dismiss this entirely though…I honestly hope Markos continues to make all of the noise and helps encourage an alternative music scene in and around Athens. We could market a new wave of Greek rock…we could call it; Grock…I’m a fucking genius. [6]

If there’s one thing that can help you invest interest in something, whether it’s to do with a movie, or a character, or in this case a band; it’s an interesting back story...and few back stories are as intriguing as the formation of THE KING’S PARADE. If you cast your mind back to 2017 you may remember I’ve already covered the English 4-piece (Still consisting of Olly Corpe, Sam Rooney, Tom English and Chris Brent) when they released their “Haze” EP, where I discovered they’d actually formed on a cruise ship around Hawaii…

Yep…no cheap rented rehearsal rooms or jam sessions in your mates garage for this lot, they used to play shows aboard the ship as a means of practicing and tightening as a band, honing their craft as they travelled; not technically on the road per se but it’s one way I guess to get that vital stage experience, and it’s far more glamorous than playing to 3 people down the local pub! The EP itself (While not their debut) was a fine sample of soulful indie pop and could have easily tapped into the buzz around RAG ‘N’ BONE MAN’s success at the time…so let’s see what they’ve done in the time that’s passed.

As it happens, they’ve released not one, but two EP’s since we last caught up with them; last years “Woman” EP and now new to 2019 they’ve released another by the simple title of “Mad”, so they’re seemingly going for the little and often approach. The question is though, how mad are we talking exactly? Where is the context? Let’s find out as we get the EP underway with the title track. It’s got a quite stripped back vibe with initially minimal instrumentation and smooth vocals, combining low-fi indie with a shoe-gaze aesthetic and it’s incredibly mellow. The chorus does have a bit more oomph behind it as the guitars get bigger and bolder and the vocals become much more impassioned; it’s a decent start.

The EP continues then with “Mistakes” and again here we’re given a mellow, minimal piece of music with emotive vocals carrying the song…a reflective little track about life lessons in love, and learning from the inevitable mistakes we will all make at some point or another; quaint but not much different from the opener really. “20” again takes a similar approach but at least incorporates subtle country-guitar in the tracks climax, and although that’s hardly a drastic departure from their usual style, it’s enough to make a noticeable difference to the listening experience. We then finish up on the closing track “Good Excuse” and it’s a good excuse as any for me to admit that my interest has sadly waned by this point. Another slow, minimalistic soft indie-pop piece with tenuous soulful elements layered within.

The disappointing thing here isn’t really about this EP to be quite frank; it’s about the band themselves…in the couple of years that have passed since, despite still managing to write lovely, twee little songs with butter-wouldn’t-melt melodies, they’ve seemingly made little progress if not gone a bit backwards. Their earlier material was at least a bit more enthusiastic and the soulful elements of their writing was just that; soulful…I’m not saying that they went all-out gospel and could raise the roof, (They ain’t no ‘Sister Act’) but their sound at least had more energy. It’s that very energy that draws you in as a listener; both motivating and uplifting…here we get none of that.

Despite this though the bands core sound and writing style has remained more or less the same, and over the course of a couple of EP’s, they’ve essentially released one album spread across three years. Despite the tonal differences between these and previous tracks, if shuffled together they could all easily make up one cohesive record and no one would really guess it was a compilation…a bit like ED SHEERAN’s music in some aspects. This EP may very well be “Mad”, but this reviewer on the other however is just sad. [3]
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Joe Strummer once famously sang that he'd fought the law, and the law won…well as it happens, today’s artist ALSO fought the law, quite regularly in fact, but decided enough was enough and ditched the court rooms in favour of clubs and venues. Let me introduce you to BENNY BASSETT; based in Chicago, Benny was in fact a lawyer for several years, before he decided to pack up his briefcase, cried objection at his own life, and set out on the road to become a musician. A bold move if ever there was one, as if there’s anything more cut throat than the judicial system, it’s the music industry, alas, Benny was not put off and over the past three years he’s spent his time travelling thousands of miles up and down America, playing over 450+ shows, adding new chapters to his life story. This April, Benny releases his brand new EP entitled “Words For Yesterday”…a reflective collection of songs to summarise his life to date. He emailed me recently and asked me to check it out, so let’s do just that.

​The EP opens up with “Window To Forever” and for the most part it’s a sombre, calming indie-pop ballad. An acoustic-led track, it’s charming as it speaks of an uncertainty; not knowing what the future holds but reminding you that, you need to take the chance sometimes. Mistakes can be made for sure, but you need to grow and take risks. The chorus is more up-tempo but the track overall is soothing and it’s a pleasant little track. “Live Where You Love The Sky” follows up and it’s another soft ballad but carries with it more of a subtle country tone. A song of optimism and following his own self-reflective journey; it encourages you to appreciate life for everything it is and do what makes you happy, embrace the selflessness of contentment and be grateful for all you have, so long as you follow your heart.  A philosophical piece as Benny really does practice what he preaches, with the song coming off as very autobiographical, but the hope and belief in his words is enthusing.

Benny isn’t a complete softie however, as proven on “Down Below”…swapping the acoustics for a grittier dose of harder, blues-based rock, there’s a sharper edge here musically but it’s still got a rich vocal harmony and a solid groove. It’s a welcome change as it provides a clear EP highlight, allowing for more swagger and attitude and no doubt this is a stand-out track in his live shows, entertaining stuff this. “Find A Way” switches things up immediately with a bassy, funk-driven piece with retro organs / synths layered throughout the track and it’s quite soulful in its own right, with a brief though enjoyable solo to boot, before the closing tracks sort of taper off with sadly less interest. “Building A Future” is arguably the EP’s weakest offering…the wood-block style synths carry another sickly sweet indie-pop piece but it does descend into a sense of repetition over the chorus, before “From You” closes the EP with another hushed piano ballad.

Overall Benny has proven himself to be a decent song-writer as his lyrical delivery carries you along the EP pretty effortlessly…the melodies flow well and he conveys his story with a softness that absorbs you into each song, resulting in a generally easy, laid back listen. A solid collection of pop songs overall though truth be told a couple more tracks like “Down Below” in future wouldn’t go amiss, sometimes you just need something to move to, but really speaking it’s a fine EP indeed. He’s still brave for quitting his day job to do this, especially such a well-paid and stable one, but he has both a commitment and an ability to make this work, and his debut album should be an interesting listen. Words for yesterday maybe…but more importantly; words to watch out for tomorrow... [6]

When I utter the word ‘Gothenburg’, I can guarantee that you’ll know what I’m referring to…you’ve got this already haven’t you? Fucking damn right I’m talking about the Crazy Frog! No honestly, before I get into this review I have to remind each and every one of you that we collectively allowed the Crazy Frog; that…irritating, frankly cancerous, poorly animated and apparently Swedish cunt-nugget to not only be a thing, but ACTUALLY TOP THE CHARTS! I’m ashamed of us as a species. I digress…I just found out that the Crazy Frog did indeed originate in Gothenburg and had a mild PTSD episode.

I say this though with relevance as taking this seriously now, Gothenburg as we all know it is, for want of a better description, a Mecca for all things melodic death metal. Everyone from AT THE GATES to AVATAR have emerged from this epicenter of Swedish metal, which bring us to today’s band, and arguably one of the biggest of them all; IN FLAMES. Over their near thirty-year career to date they’ve delivered some of the finest melodic death metal albums to ever puncture our ears, from their seminal work on “Colony” which paved their way back in the 90’s, through to the Billboard bothering successes of “Reroute To Remain” and “Come Clarity” especially, In Flames have always been a reliable source of maelstrom…until recently that is. Back in 2016 the band released “Battles” and despite being a decent record generally, it irked many fans with its sense of pop-record production. Can they redeem themselves in the eyes of those same fans? 2019 sees them return as they channel their inner Stanley Ipkiss on “I, The Mask”…let’s check it out.

The album opens up with “Voices” and after the brief, slow build of a repetitive guitar fill that gradually rises in pitch and key, we find ourselves immersed in the familiar sounds of their heavier riffs and subtle synth elements. Vocalist Andes Fridén delivers a particularly run of the mill performance, switching from his usual raspy snarls into a more melodic vocal for the chorus. It’s a fairly standard affair, textbook In Flames in 2nd gear for the most part though Bjorn Gelotte’s solo is a nice inclusion; it’s a safe start. The title track follows up and to be fair this picks up the pace aplenty and there’s a lot more urgency here; with it’s almost thrash-based musical approach coupled with a hook-laden chorus it provides the listener with a truly up-tempo, enjoyable track and gets the album underway properly.

Elsewhere highlights include “(This Is Our) House” which combines anthemic gang vocals and a hard rocking rhythm with almost prog-inspired key changes, which includes Anders vocals; ranging from soaring melody and an emotive clean delivery to a sudden baritone, giving the track additional character. The band haven’t completely left behind the accessibility of the more pop-orientated production from their previous record however…”We Will Remember” despite its crunching hard-rock riffs carries with it a predominantly euphonious tone and it’s really easy listening, before the sudden surprise that is our closing track “Stay With Me”. This is essentially a power ballad and totally juxtaposes the album altogether…with the acoustic guitar, sweet harmonies and Anders surprisingly impassioned, heart-wrenching vocal display; it’s unquestionably a beautiful track and is in its own unique right, the best thing on this record.

Overall over the course of these twelve tracks, the album itself isn’t poor; it’s just for the most part In Flames by numbers. The Swede’s have always been able to deliver the goods over a 13-album discography now and I guess you could say there is the safety of familiarity within their brand of metal, which they do well…but it’s when you’ve got tracks like the aforementioned ballad, it makes you wonder why they haven’t done MORE of that? This is exactly the kind of track that builds bridges between not just genres but audience demographics, and dare I say it, mainstream success? The idea of a 30 year old melodic death metal band delivering such a genuinely sweet song is a mind-blowing concept, but In Flames have ALWAYS been a quality outfit…if anything just genre pigeon-holed. If the likes of BRING ME THE HORIZON can switch from death-core to getting a number one UK album in a country run by chavs and TOWIE outcasts, then on this evidence, In Flames are EASILY capable of being a lot more successful in the eyes of the wider mainstream audience. It’s just a shame it’s preceded and ultimately weighed down by the middle of the road metal before it. [6]

It’s been a long time since we’ve heard from Canadian pop princess AVRIL LAVIGNE…not since her 2013 self-titled album in fact, but there is a legitimate reason. Following the release of the album, Avril was diagnosed with Lyme disease; a bacterial infection that if untreated can lead to severe joint pain and swelling, loss of feeling and movement, heart murmurs and palpitations, and memory loss. On top of that, in 2015 she separated from second husband Chad Kroeger, only adding to her personal struggles and overall wellbeing…

There became a point where she openly admits she accepted death…but she found salvation in music and coped the best way she knew how; to play through the pain. Having spent the past six years going through treatment and recovery, and finding hope and salvation in her music, she makes her long-awaited return in 2019 with her brand new album “Head Above Water”…let’s give it a listen and check out the very songs that kept her afloat.

The album opens up with the title track, and the song that got this album off of the ground to begin with. A song of hope, pleading and determination as she sings of fighting off this illness; acknowledging her own mortality but defiant in its face…the idea of drowning here being used to describe her struggles and solitude, and as the sombre piano and subtle orchestral elements wash over you, it’s incredibly moving and deeply personal. A solid pop ballad this and a decent start in all fairness. “Birdie” follows up and here we hear her sing of a caged bird allowed the opportunity of freedom; metaphorically very soul-searching as she hints at personal growth and development, moving onwards and upwards in life, towards new horizons, like a bird free in the wind. Musically subdued but it’s her vocals that carry the track with their impassioned delivery.

Here though is when the album takes, for want of a better word, a bit of a dip…”I Fell In Love With The Devil” can’t help but make me think of poor Chad Kroeger…Avril here pulling off the ultimate Nickelback trolling. I digress, it incorporates more orchestral elements through some morose strings, but the opening line of ‘Shotguns and roses’ makes me think ONE of them had been watching Terminator 2 and that sounds like one hella messy divorce. “Dumb Blonde” treats us to a collaboration with NICKI MINAJ of all people…denouncing the idea that they are some, stupid Barbie dolls and that they’ll prove us all wrong, but musically this is SUCH an immature sounding, cheesy pop track. While meant to be empowering and defiant it’s got such an adolescent sound compared to the rest of the record and it cannot be taken seriously. “Hello Kitty” is a better track…let that sink in.

“Goddess” and “Bigger Wow” lyrically make you do a double take in places and really it’s cringe-worthy. On the former we learn of how Avril is treated like a Goddess, because some unknown person finds her sexy in her pyjamas…even suggesting he goes banana’s over her; banana’s and pyjama’s in an Avril Lavigne song in 2019…the latter? Well the latter really stretches her vocabulary…check this out “I just wanna bigger wow, ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-bigger na-na-na…”, my brain just fucking exploded! “Warrior” may end the album on an emotive note with ample vocal harmony but, it’s too little too late.

Avril over the course of her last couple of albums has tried her best to shake her initial pop-punk skater chick image, and for the most part this IS a much more mature album it has to be said, HOWEVER…the ballad approach wears thin over time. Yes this is a massive victory for Avril personally as she’s been through A LOT recently, hell I applaud her…but it doesn’t give boring songs a pass. When she DOES try and liven things up, the energy is wasted on frankly childish tracks and ideas, really doing herself no favours. Am I glad she recovered and that she’s fit and healthy, making music again? Of course I am…am I glad THIS was the comeback album? No…no I’m not, it’s annoyingly disappointing overall. I was hoping for something…how can I put it? Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-better. [3]

'My Wreckord Collection' is becoming an interesting little feature...we've gone from an underground death metal masterclass, to lashings of thrash and now...in our third installment, we're going for something totally different yet again. Today we're going to be putting the spotlight on Mike Cummings of West Chester Pennsylvania stoner rockers BACKWOODS PAYBACK, who last year released their newest album "Future Slum", to find out what it is about NEIL YOUNG he loves so much...

“I sat down to write a bit about my record collection but, it seemed a bit overwhelming at the time. So many records, so many artists, so many genres; so many formats! I decided to hone in on the one artist that may have influenced me the most and that, would be NEIL YOUNG. I was turned onto “Harvest” before I was 10 years old; it was one of my mom’s favourite records and in constant rotation at the house growing up. Something about the fragility of his voice made me stop whatever I was doing whenever it came across the speakers. Then getting older and understanding the words he was singing, I realized just how powerful that soft voice actually was. As I got older and started digging through crates for my own record collection I was blown away by the sheer VOLUME of records Neil Young had (And continues to) put out. A folk record, a psych record, a “punk” record, a noise record, a synth record…he never stops! And when you think you caught up to him, he is already onto the next sound. It’s inspiring, it’s refreshing, and at times it’s FRUSTRATING (Which is a good thing in my opinion!).”

“I have managed to find just about his entire catalogue on vinyl through the years. Some get listened to more than others…some have only been spun once. Some (The ditch trilogy of “Time Fades Away”, “On The Beach” and “Tonight’s The Night”) get played weekly at the house. These records shaped who I am. They make me feel strong, they make me feel small. They guide me through tough times and they sing with me in happier ones. I am not sure who or even what I would be, had I not heard THAT voice all those years ago, coming through my mom’s little turntable stereo in the living room…”

ps…

“When it comes to embarrassing records, I don’t think I have one. Sure there’s a TON of stuff I dig on that a LOT of people think is goofy (IE: SUGAR RAY  - “Lemonade and Brownies”!) but I am not ashamed of any of them. I think they make us who we are. EMBRACE THE AWKWARD!”

Well well well...what can I say? 2018 has been and gone; some of it was awesome, some of it was interesting, some of it was amusing and a lot of it was spectacularly shit...however, one thing that's consistent is the sheer volume of music and art created around the world. 2018 saw me cover my usual rock and metal albums...there wasn't a lot of goth...but I dabbled in some pop, in some rap, in some hip-hop...that's not including that which I checked out for the team over at All About The Rock...ultimately 2018 has kept me on my toes musically and I'm sure that my Top 20's, no matter the category, can show you that. 

From Eurovision bangers courtesy of Saara Aalto...to heavy metal swan songs a la Machine Head. From returning Welsh rap rock renegades The Kennedy Soundtrack...to returning Finnish goth godfathers Musta Paraati. From crossover WWE Superstar Elias...to young crossover Stranger Things superstars forming Calpurnia...you name it there's been something for everyone in 2018 and I like to think I've covered a fair unbiased amount of it. After over 200 albums and EP's, the above gallery showcases the best of the best of 2018 and I hope you agree with my overall picks. Below you'll find the link to the GTGC Facebook page, where you can find my lists in their entirety (Including the bonus WORST 20 OF 2018) and my official GTGC 2018 Spotify Playlist, and I hope you enjoy listening to it as much as I enjoyed compiling it. Here's to 2019 and all of the new music coming our way...some of it will get the GTGC treatment, and you know you're looking forward to that. Peace out bitches...WUBBA LUBBA DUB DUB!!!!!!!!!!!!

You may remember a short while ago; I managed to catch up with David Challenger for a chat about all things THE KENNEDY SOUNDTRACK, and got the guitarist to talk about the past, the present and the possible future for the Welsh rap-rockers. Having only recently reformed for the first time since their debut album run in 2002, nostalgia has been ripe within the KST camp, with the band re-releasing that same debut; “Tale Of 2 Cities”, especially for collectors on cassette store day, as well as playing a come-back headline show in Newport. However, with the cassette proving incredibly popular, and the show itself being a sell-out, it would be foolish to pass up on such an opportunity, given the fresh interest in the band. The result; they are not only riding the wave of nostalgia, but they’re owning that son of a bitch Kelly Slater style…and in the wake of all the excitement, they opted to treat long-time fans with a new compilation of B-Sides and rarities, together for the first time on one album…so with that in mind, let’s check out “B-Sides”.

We begin with “You Never Know” and WHAT a way to kick this album off! Originally available on the “Bloodshot Eyes” single, it perfectly encapsulates all that was good with the early nu-metal era of alternative rap rock…the fuzzy guitar distortion, the deep bass lines, the up-tempo delivery…sharp, angst-riddled lyrics and a huge hook-filled chorus, full of melody and harmony. The instrumental-heavy climax genuinely gives you goose-bumps as it filters out with one last flurry of noise and passion and it’s perfect. Firstly this belongs on the actual album, and secondly this deserves to close proceedings, end on a high note, y’know? It’s got that vibe to it…fucking brilliant stuff. We follow this up with the Melodic Mix of “24-7” and while it retains the original rap-heavy approach of the album version, here we find David taking over on vocal duties for the chorus instead of Nic Harvard and it gives us a fresh take on a classic. It’s still full of piss and vinegar but the inclusion of cleaner vocals softens the track, rendering it both freshly interesting but no less enjoyable compared to the original.

Elsewhere we have “Wide Awake” which features a brief guest vocal from SKINDRED front-man Benji Webbe. His inclusion is minimal at best, really, only offering what can be described as Caribbean Scat? I mean that as in the Scat Man (Bee-dap-bap-badda-boop), not as in, shit…please be aware of that, thank you. The song itself is a primarily mellow acoustic ballad and aside from a mid-track tempo-change of Nic’s low-key hip-hop input, it serves as a wonderfully sweet ballad, showing the Welsh quintet were more than one-trick ponies. “Bring Me Down” ironically picks things back up again with a grittier, riff-driven guitar sound before some sleek, classic hip-hop lyrical delivery, in ways harking back to the likes of PUBLIC ENEMY (Think the early Tony Hawk soundtracks), while promotional single “Proud” really gets going in proper KST fashion…really emphasising their status as the valley’s answer to LINKIN PARK…few UK acts truly embraced the nu-metal movement like this lot and despite a genre saturation, their background and tastes allowed them to still sound unique and exciting, which still holds true to this day.

​At only nine tracks long, it’s over far too quickly…alternative versions of “Yourself” and the aforementioned “Bloodshot Eyes” make an appearance, and if anything can be picked at really it’s the deep cut “E.M.B.”, which with its funk-driven instrumental style and almost 70’s guitar-tones sounds more out of place than anything else, but let’s be honest, this is the kind of sound you light up for, if you know what I mean? You do dabble in the devils lettuce, don’t you? Essentially, as was discussed with David, The Kennedy Soundtrack are happy to be back and they’re excited to be playing music again…while at the same time, long-time fans are even happier to have them back themselves. Somewhat of a cult band given their brief original run, but now is THE perfect time to discover KST, or even give them another chance. Hopefully we’ll have new music in 2019, and they’ll be killing music all over again. [8]

This is not, the greatest review in the world; no…this is just a tribute…a tribute to a once mighty beast…whose powers have been depleted faster than Superman getting pegged with a Kryptonite dildo. Yes we’re here today to remember TENACIOUS D. Back in 2001, the comedy rock duo of Jack Black and Kyle Gass would become one of the greatest cult phenomenon’s of modern alternative music, with tracks like “Wonderboy”, “Tribute” of course and not forgetting “Fuck Her Gently”, not only bridging the gap between music and comedy, but doing it so effectively. EVERYONE would sing along to these, and the sketches that littered their self-titled debut were genuinely amusing, but alas, the laughter wouldn’t last too long…

Their follow up project “The Pick Of Destiny” (Both an album and a motion picture) didn’t do so well, (At the box-office especially) losing money and receiving mixed to negative reviews; it seemed like they’d undertaken too much…perhaps their fifteen minutes was already up? The joke seemingly already wearing thin…however to the surprise of many, they returned in 2012 with the attempted come-back album “Rise Of The Fenix”. A shot at redemption, it did get them nominated for a Grammy award for Best Comedy Album, but the quality simply wasn’t matching up to their debut and although they’d grown as musicians, they’d faded somewhat as entertainers. This leads us to 2018 and again, surprisingly, we find The D releasing another studio album’ “Post-Apocalypto”. Another concept here, it coincides with their own mini animated YouTube series (I use the term animated very loosely) following their struggles and adventures in, you guessed it, a post-apocalyptic world…but is it worth the listen?

We open up with the “Post-Apocalypto Theme” and as it acts as the animations theme song it really is only a brief jingle at best…a pacey flurry of acoustic guitar and percussion backing Jack Black’s trademark dramatic vocal. It’s up-tempo, catchy enough and easy listening,  ironically ending with the line ‘Tenacious D has got to shine’…almost acknowledging previous failures. Sadly, not only are any further ACTUAL musical highlights so few and far between, over an album consisting of TWENTY ONE tracks bare in mind…but those twenty one tracks only have a 30 MINUTE run time…this really isn’t boding well. The tracks (If you can call them that honestly) that do manage to stand out are “Hope”, which delivers a sweet little acoustic ditty that transitions its way into a power ballad of sorts…there’s “Making Love” which can be looked upon in one of two ways; either it’s a spiritual successor to “Fuck Her Gently” or they’ve simply tried to emulate themselves with shamefully recycled ideas (STEEL PANTHER much?).

The random references to Elon Musk and Richard Branson during “Take Us Into Space” push for a little bit of fourth-wall breaking but as a track it’s typical as it comes; it’s accompanying skit “I’ve Got To Go” no more than standard D shenanigans really. Finding further musical points of worth is difficult…”Daddy Ding Dong” opts for a more metal inspired piece, Jack Black does love a hard rocking riff but it’s nothing shy of ridiculous. There’s sketches about sex with cave women, a random, pro-KKK piece featuring an anti-gay march, there’s a clichéd German character, all tied in to some Donald Trump references…I mean what the ACTUAL fuck? ”JB JR Rap” has a deep, dark hip-hop synth beat and some auto tune which is probably the most interesting thing musically here which says A LOT, before we end up finishing rocking out on “Woman Time” and the reprise of the theme song. Ultimately, as an accompanying album, this really falls flat and feels more like a brief collection of sound bites AT BEST…if you’re going to invest any time in new Tenacious D material, stick to the animation on YouTube, as this really fails on record. As audio content, it not only feels rushed together, but it misses the mark entirely regarding humour…there’s nothing wrong with being crude and childish occasionally, but this is just cringe-worthy, I sadly believe the D in their name now simply stands for Done. [1]

Those of you who know me or follow this blog kind of grasp that, without beating around the bush, I’m not too up on my rap game. Sure I listen to the odd record for diversity’s sake (A bit like how Steve Hughes goes from Slayer to Enya) but ultimately my rap knowledge and awareness is sub-par at best…thinking about it that’s actually generous, I mean shit did you SEE my rapped review for the newest EMINEM record? HA! It never stops me checking out new music however and thanks to my latest reader’s poll, it was suggested that I sample some Posty…sadly I’m not on any illegal substances and this isn’t about to become the weirdest review of Postman Pat you’ve ever seen…we’re about to delve into the world of POST MALONE.

The New York born rapper has had an interesting  journey into the music industry it has to be said; one of the few rap artists who can pull off not only a fun, rock ‘n’ roll aesthetic, but remain relatively down to Earth about everything while at it, all while sustaining multi-platinum status as a rapper. I mean it’s not often you hear a rapper cite Guitar Hero and emo icons like MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE as a musical influences growing up, but despite this, Posty is now one of the biggest names in modern hip-hop and the recent mumble-rap explosion. Hammering home this point, here we have his most recent album “Beerbongs & Bentleys” highlighting both aspects of Post Malone’s crazy success story…let’s check it out…

We open up this 18-track monster of a record with “Paranoid” and for the most part it’s your typically low-fi, melodic, pop-infused hip-hop track; the slow, smooth rhythm and minimalistic instrumentation, coupled with the auto-tune laced vocal leads this to pretty standard radio-friendly stuff. The autobiographical lyrics speak of his circumstances since finding fame, always watching his back, wanting that normality but when those cheques came; people changed, and despite his accomplishments it’s given him anxiety; an interesting, character building start. The level of self-awareness continues through “Spoil My Night” too, which focuses on the opposite side of the coin, knowing he can use his new found wealth and fame to get the girl with the ‘beautiful boobies’…and that’s a QUOTE I shit you not. While not entirely bragging, he’s aware enough to know the behaviour is toxic and to a degree there’s a level of morality layered within the lyrics.

With over an hour’s worth of music to mull over there’s plenty to talk about here, and we have to talk about some of the collaborations on this record for sure…and this includes the lead single “Rockstar” featuring 21 SAVAGE. The mumble-rap qualities are all the more prominent and it’s easy to see how the modern Soundcloud rap movement helped shape artists like Post Malone. Another minimalist, trap-based track, it really benefits from the less-is-more approach with a slick beat and down-tempo groove, although 21’s vocals couldn’t possibly be any flatter…honest to god he’d better avoid Sweden, Ikea will try to sell him off as a fucking shelf unit that’s how flat he is! Another single “Ball For Me” featuring NICKI MINAJ delivers too with some sickly-sweet retro synths and benefits from Minaj’s more up-tempo lyrical pace and tone, she’s been on form in 2018 taking into account her album “Queen”, they work well together and the track compliments them both.

Posty likes to shake things up a little bit now and again mind and examples of this here are “Stay”, which is honestly a decent little acoustic-based ballad, highlighting his ability as a song-writer, while “Over Now” despite retaining the more guitar driven style, has a more subtle, alternative indie-rock feel to it, channelling those early influences. If there’s anything negative to be said here really it’s simply on a matter of consumption; there is so much to digest here and there are times where you can’t help but feel going over the hour mark was at the very least excessive. For the most part, despite the aforementioned tracks, he CAN come across as a little vocally one-dimensional and it seems he’s quite content with his overall formula…I mean it’s working for him don’t get me wrong, but 18 cuts is a couple of beerbongs too many to be honest, I’d be more inclined to call an Uber than get in the Bentley in this condition. Nevertheless, it’s an enjoyable album for the most part and I’m happy to learn that Post Malone isn’t some terribly named new sub-genre, unless he claims it as his own…I really wouldn’t put it past him. [7]

​GIRL! I WANT TO TAKE YOU TO A GAY BAR! Well, to be honest, actually I don’t, BUT, I DO however want to take you on a journey, to remind you about one of the most underrated, hardest working bands on the planet; ELECTRIC SIX. I preach this practically every year, and that’s simply because, whether you’re aware of it or not, Electric Six have practically released a new album EVERY FUCKING YEAR since “Fire”, and frankly not enough people take notice!

People may naturally assume that, to be so prolific creatively, to produce a full album a year and complete all their touring commitments, it really must be a case of quantity over quality? And sure over the years, the band have dropped a lot of their overtly blatant ridiculousness, but having spoken to front man Dick Valentine, it’s interesting to learn that, despite him being very much the face and voice of the band, it’s very much a group effort. Each member of the band in fact writes three or four songs for each album cycle, resulting in a lot of time being saved and more importantly, a rich tapestry of differing styles and influences shaping each and every record. With that in mind, we’re about to delve into album number FOURTEEN; “Bride Of The Devil”…let’s get hitched…

With Dick’s typically dry-humour we open up with “The Opener” and I do like it when things get to the point it has to be said…with its subtle distortion and sludgy riffs, accompanied by plenty of vocal wails, plus Dick favouring his gritty, higher pitched delivery here, almost channelling an AC/DC-esque style, it’s an intense but enjoyable start. This actually carries through the first half of the album with some truly solid cuts from E6, keeping momentum going at a steady but satisfying pace…tracks like “You’re Toast” musically slowing things down for the most part, opting for a semi-blues rock offering, with Dick’s vocals full of piss and vinegar, to a degree akin to something CLUTCH might produce, which is always a good thing, while “(It Gets A Little) Jumpy” is a quaint little acoustic number, full of smooth melody and Summery hooks; it really is a lovely little track.

The second half of the album however….sadly; doesn’t match the same quality. It exceeds it! It honestly just gets stronger as it goes on and seriously, the band is on top form here…”Hades Ladies” saunters in with its gravelly rock ‘n’ roll vibe and deep groove; full of swagger and confidence…the title track utilises more of a simplistic synth-based hook layered within some classic rock influences, especially the brief solo which would easily please fans of THE DARKNESS for example, before album highlight “Witches Burning” delivers some classic E6 with its bluesy guitar licks and quality riff-work with an anthemic chorus…this is quality.

The album DOES drop the ball slightly with its closing track “The Worm In The Wood” as the sudden drop in tempo isn’t so much of a come-down as a let-down, with the latter half of the album getting you pumped up, hoping for an explosive climax. The tinny almost tropical guitar’s giving off an almost CHRIS ISAAK vibe which is nice, don’t get me wrong, but it can’t help but feel ever so slightly anti-climactic. Overall however that’s a minor annoyance that doesn’t take away from what is admittedly a superb album…fourteen albums in and Electric Six are still as consistent and reliable as ever, on this instance maybe even more so, as it’s one of their strongest collection of songs in a few years now…if I may paraphrase the great BILLY IDOL…it’s a nice day for a white wedding; it’s a nice day to, start listening to Electric Six again. [8]

Beige; such a vibrant colour…it’s got so much depth and character, it’s such an interesting and thought-provoking colour…said absolutely NO ONE ever. Beige is usually only found in the unused dust covered section of the B&Q paint chart, or in the mug-shots of Burberry-clad young offenders, but more often than not it’s used descriptively as a negative, aimed at only the blandest, most unexciting things you can think of…and this is where today’s band comes in; let me introduce you to a band called SCRATCH.

Yep, that’s right, Scratch…just Scratch, what an utterly unimaginative name…people mock HIM but at least that’s representative of the occult, but Scratch? I mean, scratch what? My arse? I dread to think of the names you thought WEREN’T good enough! Anyway we’ve only just scratched the surface…see what I did there? THAT’S ABOUT AS GOOD A USE FOR YOUR NAME AS ANY! PUNS! I digress…the band consists of members Ruzbeh Irani and Avinash Lalwani, (Ruz and Avi for short) and not only are they band mates, but childhood friends, yet what DOES make things interesting, is the fact they live thousands of miles apart, in New York and Perth, Australia respectively! This however, is literally all the info we’re given…you may think they were keeping the initial email brief, but no! I’ve checked their Facebook profile AND their actual website and that’s ALL the information! Even their bio is beige! It’s like they aren’t even trying! I’m losing interest already, but, it IS their debut EP so I’ll put it down to inexperience…what’s the EP called…”Scratch”…it’s self-titled…DAMNIT ARE YOU THAT PROUD OF THAT NAME!?!?! Let’s check it out before I burst a blood vessel…

We open up with “Soak” (I'm surprised it wasn't "Sniff") and initially it’s as though we’re heading into country blues-rock territory, but it quickly erupts with a grandiose post-rock dose of tinny guitar and percussion…the vocals are interesting in the sense that, while initially weak, they are belted out in the chorus, giving the track multiple personalities. The pitch of the backing vocals in places however is excruciating, and over its five minutes it crams in a fair amount of style, simultaneously sounding like it’s lost somewhere between U2, RADIOHEAD the PSYCHEDELIC FURS, there’s a very alternative 90’s vibe to this. “Newer Things” follows up and continues the soft vocal delivery over some light indie tones, before again cranking it up for the chorus, allowing for more vigour and general energy from the instrumentation with a slightly more distorted guitar sound, it’s quite 50/50 really.

Next up we have “I Don’t Mind” and they’re happy to point out that it’s the first song they wrote as a band and that it’s one of their favourites…carrying forward the initial soft country blues tone to the guitar, coupled with the mellow vocals, it’s got that saloon vibe to it…you can picture the montage right now; the lone outlaw slowly strolling into town at dawn, drinking liquor and smoking cigars…the subtle attitude of the electric guitar creating an aura of suspense and this is easily the best track on the EP right here, before we finish up on “The Key”.  A slow, methodical and utterly lifeless track that just drones on pointlessly with a repetitive riff and a grating, brassy guitar tone, seriously it’s so drowsy…that is until the intense almost punk-rock flurry of the chorus, but sadly these elements don’t complement each other, oh no, this song just feels broken…descending into a barrage of noise at the tracks climax. Was the key in question referring to the intake of cocaine? Because this song literally sounds like they did a studio take of before and after sniffing…ultimately Scratch sound like a band with a multitude of influences, but they’ve yet to settle on an idea as to what they want their sound to be…this sounds very trial and error. Truthfully they’d make a genuinely decent shoegaze based, blues country outfit should they keep things mellow and melodic, but the jarring rock instrumentation and rough vocals don’t benefit them at all. I guess you could say that, they should…start from scratch, which reminds me…FOR THE LOVE OF FUCKS SAKE CHANGE YOUR NAME! [3]

The rock ‘n’ roll lifestyle…very much akin to that of any Santa Carla vampire really; you know…party all night and all that malarkey…well it turns out, a couple of UK bands didn’t get that memo last year! Maybe it’s just coincidence but both YOU ME AT SIX and today’s band, DEAF HAVANA (Despite charting favourably) pretty much underperformed and underwhelmed with their previous albums “Night People” and “All These Countless Nights” respectively. They may have been children of the night but oh what music they DIDN’T make…well this year both bands are aiming for redemption with swift follow-up records. I’ve already covered YMA6’s new one “VI” over at www.allabouttherock.co.uk but here I’m going to be looking at Havana’s new LP entitled “Rituals”.

Written with a fresh, interesting approach; here we found front-man James Veck-Gilodi throwing out the usual Deaf Havana rule-book to jot down no more than just some potential song names first. He would then write songs according to those titles, fitting the lyrics and music around those ideas and concepts, with the band then completing them in the studio once satisfied. The end result? The 13 tracks we have right now making up “Rituals”…let’s check it out.

The album rather appropriately opens up with “Wake” and while a completely separate body of work it’s still as though there’s this redeeming narrative that both aforementioned bands are focusing on; the morning after the night before, referencing the previous albums. No more than a 40 second intro with the words “You can fall” repeated in a choir-esque fashion…very hushed but slowly climbing in volume and presence, before cutting off and leading into first track proper “Sinner”. An incredibly jovial track combining elements of soft indie-rock and boy-band pop melodies; an incredibly light-hearted take on James’ own personal past experiences; a song of admittance and acceptance delivered with a very British stiff upper lip, but it’s very easy listening and enjoyable.

This general tone musically carries through the album fairly consistently…even conceptually as far as the single-word song titles. “Holy” utilises a subtle, underlying funk-inspired feel coinciding with the already established indie-pop vibe, backed with more choir accompaniment courtesy of the London Contemporary Voice Choir…”Worship” too with its percussion-driven acoustic tones and minimal synths makes for a very laid back listen, which can also be said for “Fear”, while album highlight “Pure” is rich in rhythm and delivers a simple yet effective chorus, even teasing at James’ grittier vocal qualities, highlighting his passion as a singer.

Some of the tracks do plod along, barely escaping 2nd gear towards the end of the album mind, with “Heaven” again utilising the help of the choir, providing gospel-inspired gang vocals over a generally slower, stripped back track, while the albums longest offering “Saint” makes you wish you had the patience of one. God it’s so slow and boring…I mean it’s touching, but boring…and who really wants to feel bored when touched? I’m getting off topic now…ahem…that sadly too leads us into the closing track “Epiphany” and it’s here I had a sudden realisation; this track is also sadly a bit dull, as well as feeling abrupt and almost unfinished. “Rituals” as a whole isn’t bad; it’s got its pleasant pop qualities, James is still a fine story-teller, plus it’s got more energy than its predecessor…and credit to them for experimenting with their entire approach to writing this time around. The only thing I will say is that know James can properly belt out the vocals when called upon with grit and conviction, he’s done so in the past, and this album again does lack some of that edge…other than that it’s a decent album. Now if you’ll excuse me I have my OWN rituals to sort out…these puppies aren’t going to sacrifice themselves…[6]

In the past I’ve touched upon how some professional wrestlers or, WWE Superstars, embark on musical careers outside of the squared circle; we can all agree that Chris Jericho is doing remarkably well with FOZZY (In all fairness Chris Jericho does remarkably well at everything he’s the motherfucking GOAT), while Jeff Hardy prefers the underground artistic freedom of expression with his band PEROXWHY?GEN (The presentation of that word still makes me feel like I’ve been driven through a Spanish announce table). However it’s rare when you can say that the WWE have fully invested in a character within kayfabe, to the point that they personally back a musical project to further strengthen a gimmick on screen. John Cena was given this treatment when he dropped his hip-hop album “You Can’t See Me” back in 2005 but, he was THE man, he was the one getting the push so it was to be expected…so it speaks volumes for how the company see’s ELIAS in 2018.

Elias (Real name Jeffrey Scuillo) has been part of WWE since joining NXT in 2014 and over the past couple of years has been developing his ‘drifter’ character, slowly but surely moving up to his current position on the Raw roster. More famed for his promo segments than his in-ring accomplishments, he can always be found with his guitar in hand attempting to sing to the crowd in each city visited, often in a degrading manner with a heel persona, before usually being interrupted by other superstars. The trouble is, despite being a heel in theory, his character and dry, sarcastic humour have won over the vast majority of the audience and he’s more often than not cheered, with the crowd fully aware that WWE now stands for ‘Walk With Elias’…in fact, he’s gotten so over, that WWE have backed him to the extent that they’ve allowed him to record a genuine EP, so with that… silence your cellphones, hold your applause and shut your mouths as we “Walk With Elias”…

The EP opens up with the elegantly titled “The Ballad Of Every Town I’ve Ever Been To” and it’s this track that’s essentially the foundation of Elias’ character on screen. A play on old songs such as “I’ve Been Everywhere” by GEOFF MACK made famous by LUCKY STARR, also later JOHNNY CASH, it highlight’s every town he’s had the misfortune of performing in, twisting the style to fit his heelish persona, but retaining the old acoustic, country charm. Rich in both melody and melancholy, all the while mocking each town, it makes for some classic cheap heat; wonderfully delivered. “Elias’ Words” utilises a similar approach with the country-blues inspired feel, really paying homage to the original southern style with his spoken word lyrical delivery, heavy on smarmy self-importance and portraying his character brilliantly.

“Nothing I Can’t Do” switches things up with a sombre piano ballad showcasing he’s far from a one-trick pony and has more moves than John Cena…lyrically self-aware, he displays a subtle arrogance to further that heel heat as he sings that he wrote this song on a piano, just to show you that he could, because he’s better than you, there is literally nothing he can’t do and with the exception of only tone, it’s a great comedy song, before closing track “Walk With Me” returns to the acoustic, blues style complete with husky drawl and emotive guitar solo channelling the likes of Orbison and Clapton. As far as anticipated releases go it’s safe to say that, this isn’t up there on the list, but for fans of WWE and Elias especially this is a great addition for collectors and also a superb extension of Elias’ character…it’s not ground-breaking musically but it does its job perfectly and credit to Elias’ and WWE especially for making this happen, such is their faith in him with the product. Forget walking with Elias, WWE have taken the gimmick and ran with it and it’s paying off, you just wish he was mocking your town too. [6]

That awkward moment when your girl asks you over for ‘Netflix & Chill’ but the Netflix is so good that the chill doesn’t happen…this, my friends, is what happens when you discover “Stranger Things”. Only two seasons strong, the Netflix original has garnered one of the strongest cult followings in recent TV history with its throwback 80’s tones and quaint sense of pop-culture nostalgia, combining sci-fi and low-key horror with classic teen-flick vibes, all wrapped up in homage to the likes of Stephen King. One of its main strengths is it’s incredible young cast and today we’re going to be focusing on one in particular; Finn Wolfhard. Now still only 15 years old the Canadian has shown some incredibly impressive acting chops not only with his drama and emotional skills in Stranger Things, but also in the remake of the aforementioned Stephen King’s “IT”, where he got to embrace a more comedic role and pulled it off brilliantly.

This isn’t Cinemassacre however and  we’re not here to review movies, but luckily Finn is a young lad of many talents and it’s here I’m going to point you in the direction of a band by the name of CALPURNIA, which he somehow finds the time for between film and TV! Founded in Vancouver just last year by Finn (Who’s on guitar and vocals) plus drummer Malcolm Craig, the band is completed by guitarist / vocalist Ayla Tesler-Mabe and bassist Jack Anderson, and they have already released a debut EP of original content entitled “Scout”. The question is, at their young age, do we find ourselves with another HANSON or heaven forbid, AARON CARTER? Let’s find out…

The EP opens up with a track called “Louie” and to my surprise we’ve got this restrained, stripped back, blues country type piece, but it also utilises a subtle, almost Caribbean tone; rich in its tinny-guitar and lulling ambiance. It’s an unexpectedly mature sound (Unless it’s been inspired by Spongebob) and nowhere near the energetic, colourful indie-pop I was expecting. The rawness of the track is hammered home by Finn’s vocals which here sound their weakest from a production perspective, but it only adds to the tracks character, really embracing the original feel for minimalist bluegrass. “Wasting Time” maintains the overall tone musically but here we have a little more of that energy I expected, embracing more of an early rock ‘n’ roll feel and it’s got a genuinely solid guitar solo to boot; this is much better.

“Greyhound” is a twee, melodic, up-beat track that’s disguising a certain sadness, as the story finds our character following a break up, travelling to a show alone after buying two tickets, you can feel his disappointment…the accompanying video too has a simple but effective message portraying everyone in life has a different path, but it’s all about the journey in the end as life always tends to work out eventually. Lead single “City Boy” returns to that raw, bluesy tone but has a simple but enjoyable chorus with gang vocals and happy-go-lucky vibe. “Blame” and “Waves” then round off the EP with a quirky, up-tempo indie piece and a more, relaxed, shoegaze inspired track respectively; the latter allowing Ayla to take a more prominent role vocally. Ultimately as I said previously the sound they’ve gone for is far more mature than what could have been expected and I don’t mean that with any sense of detriment…there’s zero sign of any commercial manufacturing here and it shows it’s not just a PR ploy to make Finn even more famous, this is about a BAND, not just Finn and that needs to be highlighted. They’ve written this EP the way THEY wanted it, and while it’s a little rough around the edges, if it’s something they want to stick at, working around Finn’s acting schedule, they have all the genuine potential to be a solid blues rock band; the talent is already there it just needs a little fine tuning. Let’s just hope Finn’s not eaten by a Demogorgon or some shit in Stranger Things season 3, or this project might find itself upside down too. [5]

I want you to cast your minds back just for a moment, to the year 2009…what a weird year in pop music that was. LADY GAGA exploded onto the world’s music scene with her debut album / virtual hit-factory “The Fame”…inspiring young women everywhere to dress like absolute twats…weeks before his massive come-back tour, MICHAEL JACKSON passes away from accidental overdose, making sure you double-checked your own prescription or else you too would be moonwalking to the morgue (On a serious note that was a bit unexpected)…SUSAN BOYLE became a thing, no really, that actually happened…and a little known artist by the name of OWL CITY would dominate the airwaves with THAT song “Fireflies”…seriously it was everywhere, like a synth-pop plague, going 19x platinum worldwide…you must remember, surely? I digress…following the immediate success of Owl City’s (Real name Adam Young) debut, he seemingly faded away…but he didn’t disappear. In addition to having worked on numerous film soundtracks including “The Croods” and “Wreck-It Ralph”, he now returns with his SIXTH studio album; “Cinematic”…shall we see what owl the fuss is about?

The album kicks off with “Fiji Water” and such is the innocent charm of the simplistic electronica I honestly thought this was inspired by the ‘Human Music’ from "Rick And Morty"…I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if Jerry wasn’t singing this himself! Jokes aside, it combines the unsullied tinkling’s of a baby’s cot mobile stylistically with the sickly sweet vocals…the chorus is catchy enough and this is harmless pop music with some pleasant little hooks; a pretty safe start. Speaking of choruses, “Montana” delivers well with what could musically find itself at home on LINKIN PARKS’s “One More Light” album, naturally he’s no Chester but aesthetically it wouldn’t feel out of place, you can easily imagine Shinoda accompanying this.

Despite being known for the easy-listening electronica, there are a couple of tracks that utilise a more guitar driven approach…”Be Brave” being the first offering. Initially a delicate piano led piece, it takes advantage of the slow-build and gradually becomes this emotive, emo-rock track and it’s genuinely enjoyable as it kicks into gear. “Firebird” then swaps the piano for the acoustic strings and again, the hooks on this chorus are pretty infectious, allowing for a clear album highlight. This too can be said for “Lucid Dream” which when it gets going embraces a total European dance-pop characteristic…in the right hands a potential floor-filler this. By contrast then, the cutely titled “Not All Heroes Wear Capes” is a wonderful little tribute to his father via an acoustic ballad; equal parts nostalgic admiration and present-day appreciation.

While the tracks I’ve highlighted have their own charms and attributes…we can’t ignore the fact that, at eighteen tracks long…this is a lot of synth-pop to get through and given the very often butter-wouldn’t-melt level of innocence within the vocals and poppier-than-thou electronica, it can become overwhelming to the point of nausea. “House Wren” for example is just so incredibly corny, lyrically it makes my ears cringe…”Winners Never Quit” ironically made me want to abandon this review but I’m in too deep now…this might even make Charlie Sheen quit and he INVENTED winning! Aside from some alternate versions of tracks, the album officially closes on the title track and essentially it’s like an excuse to use a lot of movie-themed metaphors and analogies…no more. Essentially here, Owl City haven’t really changed one iota…their sweet electro-pop is still on the verge of troubling diabetics…while they can clearly still produce infectious, radio-conquering tunes, this album in its entirety is for want of a better word; excessive. [5]

When it comes to bands succeeding from day one, there are few in recent times who can honestly say they have hit the ground running as hard as FLORENCE + THE MACHINE…the London-born group fronted by Florence Welch dropped their debut “Lungs” back in 2009 and really haven’t looked back since. Multi-platinum sales, Brit Awards, Mercury Prize nominations…and that was just the debut! This form continued as both follow-up records “Ceremonials” and “How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful” each respectively gave Florence a hat-trick of Number 1 albums and the accolades kept coming…however the style was slowly but surely changing and they were in time becoming more refined…and this leads us to 2018 where Florence released album number four; “High As Hope”. Self-produced by the band themselves, let’s see how the machine is operating these days…

The album opens up with, (Or at least tries to) “June” and I say that because there’s at least a 14 second delay between the start of the track and you being able to actually hear anything, and I honestly don’t know what this aims to achieve, coming across as more of a production error rather than having any beneficial point within the song. When the song IS flowing however we get a piano led, restrained little track, gently accompanying Florence’s instantly recognisable husky, sometimes warbled vocals. It does have a slight, climactic flurry but it’s abrupt ending spoils that completely. Were the spare 14 seconds meant to be this side of the song, instead of being empty? Here it just sounds incomplete; a poor start.

Lead single “Hunger” then follows and admittedly this is much better; with a more up-beat rhythm its sounding far more positive, with encouraging lyrics and a gospel-inspired clap-along accompaniment, coupled with soulful backing gang-vocals, this is Florence as we know her and she’s so easily capable of writing songs that simply ooze with joyousness; this being one of them. This is reinforced by the track “Patricia” which again has all of the classic F+TM traits, wonderfully blending soulful pop with energetic indie…the string sections and bold chorus allowing for a dynamic listen and again it allows for an enjoyable song. Florence has always had subtle gothic tendencies mind you and here it’s showcased by the ultra-moody “Big God”…the almost haunted, deeper tempo with its sultry tones and slow-build gives the album extra character overall and is a definite highlight.

This albums primary flaw however, is in fact how stripped back it actually is…as despite only being ten tracks long, it feels a lot longer because of the level of restriction, with an almost shoegaze appraoch utilised. “Grace” whilst on paper is an appropriately titled graceful little piano ballad, it feels incredibly drawn out, and as assertive as Florence is vocally the track fails to hold attention, so too do the albums closing tracks suffer similarly, with “The End Of Love” and “No Choir” rounding things off in lacklustre fashion. Yes the point of this album was a more personal, raw recording and that does indeed resonate through Flo’s vocals throughout, her ability as a performer can’t be questioned, but taking this direction has denied us the proper banger's we all know the band are capable of…there’s no rush and excitement of “Howl”…there’s no drama and climax of “What The Water Gave Me” and there’s no feisty attitude of “Kiss With A Fist”…instead, while we have a well matured album, it’s pretty much just Florence…the machine seems to be on standby. [5]

Having formed in Blackwood back in 1986, over the past 30+ years the MANIC STREET PREACHERS have become not only Welsh national treasures, but one of the biggest bands to ever come out of the UK. Despite the departure of guitarist Richie Edwards back in 1995 (I say departure, he LITERALLY disappeared off the face of the Earth) the now trio have continued to grow and cement their legacy around the world, however in recent years their style has mellowed to accommodate middle-aged life, and their musical output has been increasingly laid-back. 2018 see’s the valley’s veteran’s return for the first time since 2014’s “Futurology” with the brand new album “Resistance Is Futile”…recorded at their brand new Newport studio, let’s see what’s so hard to resist…

We open up with the track “People Give In” and it’s a quaint little track essentially highlighting the fact that we’re all human at the end of the day…there’s a chirpiness to the track; a light, airy feel, backed but the Vulcan String Quartet and some sweeping string sections, while vocalist James Dean Bradfield sings of the up’s and down’s we endure in life and the tone here gives you a sense of ‘It’s OK…just try again’ and it’s an encouraging, positive listen. One of this album’s traits however according to bassist/lyricist Nicky Wire was that it was to capture the essence of both “Generation Terrorists” and “Everything Must Go”, with the sound designed to reflect upon that era of the band, and follow up track “International Blue” does a decent job of this…with Bradfield’s distinct vocals and wailing guitar sequences, coupled with a simplistic melody it’s trademark MSP and an enjoyable listen.

This ideology is proven further by the likes of “Broken Algorithms” which harbors a subtle sense of early punk-rock which made the band famous in their formative years; the guitars having more attitude, with Sean Moore on drums then having more of an assertive presence…the overall tone being more youthful and in typical Manic’s manner they tackle society and its flaws, while “Sequels Of Forgotten Wars” utilizes more gritty guitar and the message of never-ending conflict; “There will be no parades for the likes of us” because the war is never over, the ‘blue screen’ a possible metaphor for the government and how they conduct themselves etc, they can manipulate what they want you to see and know, keeping the war machine going.

Elsewhere “Hold Me Like A Heaven” uses everything from acoustic melodies to lulling synths and gang vocal harmonies to create a truly relaxing sonic experience, wonderfully easy listening, while “Dylan & Caitlyn” mirrors this with an orchestral-led collaboration with THE ANCHORESS, (Welsh singer Catherine Davies) her vocals adding extra character to the albums overall presentation. The rest of the album pretty much captures exactly what Wire set out to do; it’s a modern take on a sound that made the band what they are today and it’s a nice little trip down memory lane for long-time fans. Lyrically astute and instrumentally crisp as always, song writing has always been a strength of these Welshmen and here they prove that yet again, in terms of story-telling through song, they’ve always been among the best. However, despite spawning an impressive five singles, none of them are entirely memorable as instant hits when compared to the level of quality in their back catalog. Still though…13 albums in and they’re still preaching, credit to them. [6]

Ah West Bromwich…while it may not have exactly been a year to remember for your beloved Albion, (It’s a football thing…they came bottom of the Premier League because they SUCK!) one thing you can always be proud of, is that you spawned one of the biggest and most influential metal bands of all time; JUDAS PRIEST. Having formed way back in 1969, the band went on to pioneer not only how bands approached playing heavy metal, but also the way metal as an entire image was perceived, introducing the now-iconic look of spiked / studded leather accessories, one that we now mostly view as a cliché. Despite their advancing years, and the likes of their fellow Brummie’s BLACK SABBATH calling it a day, Priest are still going hard and 2018 sees them release album 18; “Firepower”…but are they all guns blazing? Let’s find out…

We kick off with the title track and to be fair there isn’t a lot that can be said without going through the motions really, and that sums up the song itself. We’ve ticked all the boxes here regarding the traditional duel-guitar onslaught with pummelling drums, coupled with Rob Halford’s distinctive vocals, with a slick solo or two thrown in for good measure…it’s a decent track, a proper metal track and pretty much Priest by numbers really…or, well, ANY classic metal band by numbers for that matter. Follow up track “Lightning Strike” is predominantly more of the same really…there is a decent rhythm flowing through the track despite the gruff, often blunt delivery of Halford’s vocals in places but it’s still pretty run of the mill.

It’s not all a barrage of beige however…”Never The Heroes” utilises a strong, groove-heavy intro that builds up wonderfully into a solid, blue’s-based track that is brilliant in its simplicity, and the chorus is spot on; nothing extravagant but undeniably catchy…this is a clear album highlight. “No Surrender” is a short, sharp dose of classic metal but has ample, melodic guitar harmonies  and effective hooks during its brief run-time, resulting in another enjoyable listen, while closing track “Sea Of Red” initially swaps the aggression for subtle acoustics, as we end on a blissful power ballad. It gradually picks up the pace; even incorporating symphonic elements, but the change in overall style is a welcome swap indeed and a strong finale.

Elsewhere, well, I’m afraid over the 14 tracks on offer, the majority of it is just a little bit boring. “Evil Never Dies” is amusingly fitting as you feel that way about the song itself; it just methodically plods along  for what seems like forever, it has like, one hook pre-chorus and that’s about it. “Flame Thrower” despite its name really doesn’t ignite much interest…and the chorus sounds off vocally, it just doesn’t sound right. “Guardians” beautifully played piano intro sounds absolutely noble and heroic, but it’s just an interlude and ultimately disappoints, leading into “Rising From Ruins” which is consistent but generic at best and it’s a shame. For a band approaching their 50th anniversary it’s pretty impressive don’t get me wrong, they still play with passion and Rob Halford can still hold his own vocally, credit where it’s due, they’re far more entertaining that fellow dinosaurs THE ROLLING STONES…but just like fellow Brit metal veterans SAXON they’re running the risk of merely going through the motions now. As far as traditional metal goes, it’s fine, but like most branded clothing, you’re only paying for the name on the cover of this record. [6]

As you all know by now, every year I do a round up in some way shape or form, of the annual EUROVISION SONG CONTEST. Highly regarded in the UK as an absolutely cringe-worthy cheese-fest, it's no surprise we haven't won it for years, and that's without getting into the shows regular politics let alone the utter shambolic level of fuckery we've found ourselves in under the "leadership" of Theresa May and the current Conservative government...well actually no I'll blame Cameron too, the pig-poking prick! Regardless...we enter every year and hope to not come last essentially. The 2018 final will be held on Saturday 12th May and will take place in Lisbon, Portugal, after SALVADOR SOBRAL won the Ukraine 2017 competition...here I'll be taking a quick run down of all 26 qualified acts and giving my own personal individual score / opinion ahead of the live final...in order of live performance; let's begin...

1] UKRAINE: MELOVIN - "Under The Ladder". Aged just 21, opening the Eurovision Song Contest would seem like a daunting task for many, but Melovin (Real name Kostyantyn Mykolayovych Bocharov) is perfectly at home here, as winner of season 6 of Ukraine's version of The X-Factor. The track is an up-beat, rhythmic dance-pop piece which should in all honesty kick things off really well in terms of tempo and entertainment, but on record it isn't the most convincing vocal display in places and I just hope things don't fall flat for him on the night. 3/5

2] SPAIN: AMAIA Y ALFRED - "Tu Cancion". This is a track taken from Amaia Romero's album "Sus Canciones" and is a collaboration with one Alfred Garcia...sung in Spanish, it's one of the songs this year traditionally sung in the native language as used to be part of the rules before they relaxed things, and for all intents and purposes it's a soft piano ballad with elegant string sections...a lovely song in some aspects but luckily one of the boring ones is now out of the way early. 1/5

3] SLOVENIA: LEA SIRK - "Hvala, Ne!"...NE! NE! NE! We are the knight's who say...NE! *Ahem* All jokes aside, Slovenia's answer to MO / KESHA does a decent job of bringing a modern twist to proceedings. Utilizing a blend of hip-hop production and combining electronica with soulful pop, it's got a decent beat to it overall but it never truly takes off, with the chorus sadly coming across as anti-climatic compared to the level of expectancy of the track. 2/5

4] LITHUANIA: IEVA ZASIMAUSKAITE - "When We're Old". Ironically titled by the 24 year old, and despite her youth this isn't her first Euro rodeo! Having enrolled to compete in 2013, 2014, 2016 and 2017, she FINALLY get's her opportunity to represent her country in 2018. It's an honestly lovely song, focusing on Ieva's hushed, whispered vocals over a gentle piano lullaby...it's a slow one, and one that will rely on mood and emotions conveyed on the night, but it's a wonderfully tranquil track and should score well regardless. 2/5

5] AUSTRIA: CESAR SAMPSON - "Nobody But You". Always the bridesmaid, never the bride...having performed as part of backing vocals for two previous Austrian acts, Cesar finally get's his own shot. Arguably one of the first bandwagon jumpers this year, Cesar brings a fully emotive, gospel sound to Portugal with his blend of soulful pop music, hammered home by a strong melodic chorus...if you're a fan of RAG 'N' BONE MAN then expect to be giving Austria your vote this year... 3/5

6] ESTONIA: ELINA NECHAYEVA - "La Forza". The show isn't over until the fat lady sings...well as it happens Elina is far from fat and we're less than a quarter of our way through so buckle up! A classically trained Soprano, Elina brings a touch of class and vocal quality to proceedings this year, with her powerful vocal range and dramatic, operatic elements...if you're a fan of TARJA TURUNEN for example, you may want to send your vote Elina's way! 2/5

7] NORWAY: ALEXANDER RYBAK - "That's How You Write A Song". FEED. ME. MORE! Oh...sorry...wrong Ryback I was thinking about WWE for a second...but no in all seriousness, Alexander is technically a Eurovision veteran; he WON the competition back in 2009 with a track called "Fairytale"...can the young lad with the violin become a two-time winner this weekend? This funk-driven almost 70's inspired combination of tinny guitar and violin has plenty of energy, but will it be Norway or NO WAY!? You be the judge...2/5

8] PORTUGAL: CLAUDIA PASCOAL - "O Jardim". The hometown-hero as such, Claudia represents the hosts this year taking the torch from reigning champion SALVADOR SOBRAL and will be hoping Portugal can pull off an unexpected victory to retain the Eurovision Trophy for a 2nd consecutive year. Another acoustic/piano ballad, it's got quite a slow build and is honestly quite soppy, potentially risking too many similarities to last years winning song itself...they say lightning doesn't strike twice, I guess Saturday we'll find out. 1/5

9] UNITED KINGDOM: SuRie - "Storm". Oh boy...if you could find me a more fitting song for the UK for this competition I will do sexual things for you no questions asked...not only is the song already two years old and theoretically out-dated, lyrically and thematically it pretty much sums up the state of affairs regarding Britain and the EU and the whole Brexit debacle...metaphorically of course. Musically it is a decent pop track and has it's anthemic qualities but despite any positives I can't see us doing well at all this year...3/5

10] SERBIA: SANJA ILIC & BALKANIKA - "Nova Deca". There's always an entry with utilizes traditional middle-eastern tones and this track is that entry...and seriously what a long-ass intro, taking up nearly a third of the song! It's got a generally simple beat and does pick up, leading into an ultimately pleasant, up-tempo track with subtle dance tones, but it could have benefited  having more of this, less of the intro, as it's shot itself in the camel-toe essentially. 1/5

11] GERMANY: MICHAEL SCHULTE - "You Let Me Walk Alone". Another young talent with a background in reality TV; 28 year old Michael found mild success on Germany's version of The Voice in 2012, where he came third overall, before going on to release his debut album. This year we find him contributing yet another piano ballad to this years Eurovision playlist, and as you may have guessed it's another harmonious love-song with an impassioned climatic feel...again, nice but, it may get lost in the shuffle. 2/5

12] ALBANIA: EUGENT BUSHPEPA - "Mall"...I take one look at this guys name and I swear to god all I can think of is a bush-tucker trial...but my mental issues aside, here we have the first of our demographic-pleasing alternative entries. Eugent is a renowned rock performer in his home country and has actually supported the likes of DEEP PURPLE in mainland Europe, so he's got his credentials...but what is he offering here? A mellow, country-esque traditional folk-pop type piece with an acoustic lead and impressive vocals. It sounds good, I just wish I knew what he was saying. 2/5

13] FRANCE: MADAME MONSIEUR - "Mercy". France hardly needs the bad luck of performing 13th...their results have hardly been the most impressive in recent years, but they hope to change that in 2018. The ambient, synth-pop track follows on from recent success stories such as CHRISTINA & THE QUEENS and may go down well, and though there are no direct ties to the LGBT community, the whole MRS/MR approach could appeal to gender neutral's from an activist point of view...unless that's me looking far too deeply into what is essentially an annual song contest...2/5

14] CZECH REPUBLIC: MIKOLAS JOSEF - "Lie To Me". A potential favourite here depending on the right crowd...full of swagger and groove, Mikolas utilizes the southern blues inspired jazz tones of New Orleans to great effect here, rich in funk and passion, he confidently takes this track by the scruff and simply awaits the laudits of the Lisbon crowd. The recorded version does have some swearing in it, so that'll have to be edited during the final or he may find himself getting nil poi via disqualification... 3/5

15] DENMARK: RASMUSSEN - "Higher Ground". A man of many talents; Rasmussen (Real name Jonas) originally performed in a covers band, focusing on the likes of ELTON JOHN and ABBA, before he turned his attention to acting, focusing mainly on stage productions. 2018 see's him return to singing with this entry; a combination of power-pop and traditional, Nordic heritage in subtle tones. Despite the classic key-change sequence, it does lack a little oomph and falls just short of being an awesome entry. 3/5

16] AUSTRALIA: JESSICA MAUBOY - "We Got Love"...Hang on just a second let me just get Moe Sargi...'YO JESSICA MA BOI!" There we go...that's out of the way now...but no seriously Australia in Eurovision is still a thing. Yes it was novel having them there for the big anniversary show a couple of years ago but, despite not being anywhere remotely near Europe, here they are...the song itself is a generic, light, radio-pop song which wouldn't be out of place in some, teen Disney flick...it's fine but, I really don't see the point this year. 2/5

17] FINLAND: SAARA AALTO - "Monsters"...Finland you beautiful bastard of a country...as if you didn't already supply the world with some of the finest gothic metal and rock bands to ever grace the stage, you also have pop music nailed too by the looks! Saara Aalto ticks all the boxes having dueted with ADAM LAMBERT and ANDREA BOCELLI, not to mention having done voice acting for the Finnish dub of "Frozen", she's a proven voice. Here we have a sleek, electronic-pop monster in it's own right rich in hooks and mainstream appeal and it's an absolute top tune. All of the yes from me. 5/5

18] BULGARIA: EQUINOX - "Bones". Bulgaria's entry features yet another reality TV statistic in vocalist Zhana, who won Bulgaria's X-Factor in 2013...now, 5 years later we find them representing their country in Portugal with "Bones"...the haunting vocal tones and the predominantly dark-pop vibes of the song are pleasant enough, helped by its catchy chorus, but it sounds like a watered down version of "Skeletons" by 2017 Azerbaijan entry DIHAJ to me. 2/5

19] MOLDOVA: DoReDoS - "My Lucky Day". Three is the magic number as they say, and for this trio, it's third time lucky as they finally get to represent their country after failing to secure their place in both 2015 and 2016. Doritos as I shall call them from here on in, have a fun and up-beat approach this year combining modern pop with a GOGOL BORDELLO style of Oompa / alternative. 2/5

20] SWEDEN: BENJAMIN INGROSSO - "Dance You Off". One of the youngest performers at this years final in Lisbon, Benjamin started early and appeared in several Swedish musicals as a child and is hoping his performance experience can carry him through to another Swedish victory. With his soft vocals it can be said he's another JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE inspired pop-starlet but truth be told he's not of the same caliber previous Swedish winner MANS ZELMERLOW, he lacks that spark. A harmless pop song but I'm not expecting big things. 1/5

21] HUNGARY: AWS - "Vinszlat Nyar". Ever since LORDI won it for Finland back in 2006 there's almost always a rock song or two thrown into the mix to shake things up a bit and here we have that very token rock song. AWS deliver on all fronts with a strong melody and even stronger riffs for their hard rock performance, even including that cliched key-change and it has to be said it's a solid track...it wont win but it is a banger. 4/5

22] ISRAEL: NETTA - "Toy". While it's one thing to question Australia's inclusion in what is essentially a European competition, it can be said that you have to question Israel too...although politically and economically they are at least tied to the EU so there's that....anyway I digress this is a song contest not BBC Question Time. Netta Barzilai is an outsiders bet if ever there was one! A fun and up-tempo track for the most part, combining western pop influences with middle eastern traditions...it's a decent listen, that is until the random chicken noises...seriously I don't know if it's a gimmick or an affliction. 3/5

23] THE NETHERLANDS: WAYLON - "Outlaw In Em'". Real name Willem Bijkirk, he acquired his stage name after the late Waylon Jennings as means of a tribute and is no stranger to Eurovision. As part of THE COMMON LINNETS he finished runner-up back in 2014 and hopes to go one step further 4 years later. Mixing bluegrass with southern rock swagger, fans of BLACK STONE CHERRY and the like are sure to give him the nod of approval and send a vote his way. 4/5

24] IRELAND: Ryan O'Shaughnessy - "Together". Despite a lack of luck in recent years, Ireland are still the ones to beat as they've won Eurovision a record seven times since its inception, and they hope to add another victory in Portugal this year.Another TV talent show statistic, Ryan O'Whatshisface appeared in Britain's Got Talent back in 2012, reaching the final only to finish in 5th place...will he do better here? Another sweet, acoustic/piano ballad, it doesn't truly stand out as such but he's got enough Irish charm to win the voting public over...perhaps. 2/5

25] CYPRUS: ELENI FOUREIRA - "Fuego". Apparently Eleni here is the bookies favourite and I've been scratching my head to work out how and why...with her typically modern autotune-laden pop qualities I guess she'd make quick and easy money in the charts commercially, given the success of everyone from DEMI LOVATO to DUA LIPA and the like...it's decent enough pop song for what it's worth and catchy enough but, it's nothing special per se...we'll see. 3/5

26] ITALY: ERMAL META E FABRIZIO MORO - "Non Me Avete Fatto Niente"...It takes longer to say that than they'll stay in the top 10 this year if you ask me...it's emotive enough with its almost cinematic qualities in places but songs spoken in native tongue are hit and miss and never a guarantee...it might benefit from being on last in some eyes, but to many it'll be an afterthought as the audience suffers from fatigue and burnout, and it's hardly a climatic showstopper...I can't see this doing overly well. 2/5

So...there we have it...my run down of the 2018 Eurovision final! Have you heard any of the songs yet? Are you happy with your countries entry and more important;y, who will you be voting for? Leave your comments below, but for now...it's over to Graham Norton to entertain us with his commentary.

Recently, we in the UK have seemingly gone out of our way to make damn sure we’re a laughing stock in mainland Europe, with ‘The Wicked Witch Of The West-Minster’ Theresa May doing little to nothing to stop the likes of Brussels making us look like idiots on the world stage in the shadow of Brexit, and this weekend we shall see that trend continue, as we drown our sorrows in Bailey’s at the 2018 Eurovision song contest. I swear to god, given the mess we’re in we may as-actually-fucking-well submit Boris Johnson as our entry this year; we have THAT much confidence in this year’s competition! As you may know by now, every year I take a look back at the previous year’s winner to see what they’ve done with their fame and success, and today we avert our attention to Portugal’s own SALVADOR SOBRAL.

The 28 year old from Lisbon won the competition last year in Ukraine, marking Portugal’s 1st victory in like, forever…seriously…they’d never won it in 53 years, and he did so using a song his sister wrote called “Amar Pelos Dois”, setting a new points record (Having said that they keep meddling with the voting so expect this year’s winner to have like, a million points)…I went to check to see what he had released since his historic victory, only to find that he’d released…a live album. That’s it. Live versions of now two year old songs…so…with that said, let’s go back to 2016 shall we, where we actually have an album to go through…this is “Excuse Me”…and mate, I’ll judge if you’re to be excused or not…

We open up with that very title track and what is actually pleasant is the fact we find Salvador singing in English, swapping out his native tongue…musically it’s a quaint little piano ballad combined with soft jazz-lounge qualities, aided by the cushioned, slightly hushed, slightly husky vocals; in ways you could say he was Portugal’s answer to JAMIE CULLUM on the basis of this track; an innocent start this. Follow up “Nada Que Esperar” continues with the soothing jazz tones of the piano / double bass combination, and given it’s rough translation of ‘Nothing To Hope For’ you can feel the sadness in the performance, the acceptance of life’s situations per se and it’s very mellifluous in its own meager way.

The majority of the record flows at a steady and reliable pace, rarely diverting from its jazz-based roots, it’s a very easy-listening record really, the kind of album you’d find yourself putting on after a long day at work, sat and listened to with a glass of red with your feet up, and this is backed up by tracks like “Ready For Love Again”; with its delicately tickled piano and caressing, harmonious string sections, it’s a lulling album highlight. Speaking of lulling we have “I Might Just Stay Away” which at just over 6-minutes is the longest track here, and really emphasizes those lullaby-esque characteristics, sounding like the kind of gentle music that would come from a little girls jewelry box. The real highlights however come courtesy of “After You’ve Gone”, which is a short, up-beat quirky piece of jazz which was originally written in 1918 and has been performed by everyone from the aforementioned Cullem, to the late JUDY GARLAND, and “Autumn In New York”, which was made famous in 1949 by Ol’ Blue Eyes himself; FRANK SINATRA.

Overall I have to be honest, as far as Eurovision winners go, compared to some, I did find Salvador’s entry pretty damn dull last year and was surprised when he won (Although he got a sympathy vote through prior heart surgery and played sneaky political games with his refugees shirt) but going back to this previous album, I’ll admit he is capable of better things. Granted, this is a lot more relaxed than my usual tastes but it’s a decent modern jazz record with enough throwback appeal to keep fans satisfied. I will excuse you…JUST about. [4]