It’s weird, right? We’re at the arse end of 2022, and Covid still crops up in the conversation regarding bands plans and ideas. Typically, you’d find that bands were a bit lost, because tours were cancelled, so they’d push some extra exclusive merch to compensate, or …they’d work on a cheeky EP to tide fans over, or even just jump straight into writing their next album. But oh no, not LORDI...

The Finnish Eurovision favourites decided fuck it; following 2020’s “Killection”, they weren’t going to get to work on the next album, or even a double-album, no, that’s too uninspired; unoriginal and quite frankly boring. The band decided to work on a concept BOX-SET, of SEVEN consecutive new and original albums,  between 2021-2022 under the banner of “Lordiversity”.  

A modern, retroactive time-capsule, it spans multiple genres, eras and sounds, spanning decades, covering the growth and evolution in fashionable rock ’n’ roll, but with that beastly, Lordi twist. The question is; can a bunch of pantomime shock rockers pull off such a feat? Let’s find out, as we plough through these 78 tracks, wishing they could have settled for an EP... 

The series starts off with “Skelectric Dinosaur” and we find ourselves back in the late 1970’s, where rock music was at that initial turning point. That transition between the more innocent, formative rock ‘n’ roll, swing and more blues influenced styles, to what we now refer to separately as classic rock.  It opens up with “SCG Minus 7: The Arrival” and with its church organs, haunting wails and children's giggles, telling you that “Monsters are coming” …it’s quite the creepy introduction. This however leads us into disappointment, as we’re greeted with first track proper; “Day Off Of The Devil”.  

Musically absolutely fine for the style they are going for, imagine, KANSAS, or, ALICE COOPER or even BLUE OYSTER CULT, they’ve nailed that classic guitar tone and recording quality, credit to them, and it’s a decent, chilled out rock track, however the intro promised something a lot more sinister. The question is, how DOES the devil spend his days off? Is he there with a bowl of Coco Pops, sat on the couch in his pyjamas watching Disney+ on a Saturday morning? Who knows.... who cares...not me.  

“Starsign Spitfire” has a very slow, plodding pace to it, while it does have some decent backing vocal harmonies elevating the chorus. “The Tragedy Of Annie Mae” has a very DEEP PURPLE-esque bass-line fuelling the track and it rumbles along nicely. We do eventually finish album one off with “...And Beyond The Isle Was Mary”, and we get a quaint, piano-filled piece with rainy sound effects, resulting in a gentle closing number.  They nailed the sound of the era and have delivered well here overall; it’s not a bad start. 

Next up we have the album “Superflytrap” and we transition rather quickly from the origins of rock and early metal, into the bright lights of the discotheque. The intro piece, “SCG Minus 6: Delightful Pop-Ins" is totes cringe babes, with the porn parody content. Some bimbo taking in the pizza guy, and the pool guy, like some seedy classic blue-movie plot-segue, until the monster breaks in and there’s screaming and terror, and it’s all a bit shit. I pray Asylum don’t read this; their movies are bad enough as it is... 

The actual opening tracks “Macho Freak” and “Believe Me” are a bit better. It’s not always easy to recreate that nostalgic disco/club vibe musically with it coming out authentic, but credit to a band like Lordi, they’ve managed it. The funk-fuelled synths, alongside the twangy guitars, in this day and age remind me of DEREK BISHOP if you’re interested in modern disco, and to be fair, the band, despite their appearance, don’t sound cheesy doing this. “Bella From Hell” capitalises on some genuinely soulful backing vocals, while “Cast Out From Heaven” tries to be a genuine ballad, and, let's be honest, the vocals do NOT suit this approach. This is too jarring.  

Where do we go from here?  Album number three; “The Masterbeast From The Moon”, and we enter prog-rock territory. Inspired by the likes of PINK FLOYD etc, it’s a more ambitious piece but do a band like Lordi have the ability to pull this off? Let’s get one thing straight here, no... the answer is no. “Moonbeast” utilises an almost GHOST-like character instrumentally but that’s genuinely as good as it gets. The praise ends here. “Hurricane Of The Slain” highlights this point as, the piano rich, orchestrally led strings of the track are gorgeous, but the clash with the gruff vocals absolutely ruins things. It’s all well and good trying new things musically, but when the vocals are so often stagnant, it has a detrimental effect on the entire project. “Church Of The Succubus” at over 11 minutes fits better in the whole prog-rock aesthetic, but even that can’t save this record.  

What do we have next? “Abusement Park”, and I can’t lie to you, I do love a play on words; this title tickles me. It reminds me of JOHNNY KNOXVILLE in the film “Action Point”, but I digress. The title track absolutely reeks of classic heavy metal with the pacing, the key transitions, the style of percussion, it’s got a semi-MOTORHEAD vibe to it as well as the likes of W.A.S.P., almost power-metal in places, and it’s very up-tempo and energetic. It can be a bit cheesy with some incredibly cliched names like “Ghost Train” and “Rollercoaster”, but it’s to be expected. “Carousel” has some wonderfully emotive, smooth, sensual guitar playing that reek of the 80’s, while “Pinball Machine” harbours this strong AC/DC, or, JUDAS PRIEST level of vocal screeching.  

“Nasty, Wild & Naughty” harbours all of that overdone rock ’n’ roll sleaze lyrically, despite being a catchy piece of rock with all of the cowbell, before “Merry Blah Blah Blah” comes out of the blue as a Christmas single. The bells and choirs are there, the Santa references are there... but do you know what is also there? Me, making Ebeneezer Scrooge feel uncomfortable with my lack of festive spirit. Pull a cracker, the joke will be this song, I promise. I mean, WHY?! 

Next up we have “Humanimals” and we’ve reached our more, BON JOVI and AOR inspired tracks, and it shows. Opening track proper “Borderline” has a real, I guess, bon-jovial vibe to it (I’m sorry) with its light, up-beat synths and almost hushed percussion. The chorus houses some smoother gang vocals and its honestly quite the pleasant little track instrumentally. “Victims Of The Romance” utilises a more guitar driven approach in comparison but it reeks of that, all-too parodied hair-metal era. If you choose to picture Lordi with mullets in spandex, well, that challenging wank is on YOU my friend. “The Bullet Bites Back” stands out with its genuinely sleek guitar tones, and especially it’s solo, before we revisit “Like A Bee To The Honey”. A decent piece (Written by KISS) but, two years old, and practically becoming filler at this point.  

Our penultimate album, “Abracadaver” leans further into the emergence of what we now fondly refer to as modern metal, with that transitional period, from the mid to late 1980’s into the 1990’s. Ignoring the now tedious intro bit, we dive into “Devilium”, and we’re met with a bombardment of riffs, old-school thrash metal aesthetics and vocals that could make onions cry. The title-track isn’t much better truth be told. You CAN hear “Big-4” elements but the track does eventually descend into utter fret-wankery. “Beast Of Both Worlds” is arguably as good as it gets on this one, with it’s very SLAYER-esque chugging riff-work and rhythmic snarls. Done well enough but, beyond dated. 

Finally, then, and oh how glad I am knowing this (Excited for this one? Hell no, I’m just glad this is over with), we round things up with “Spooky Sextravaganza Spectacular” and that name alone reeks of ROB ZOMBIE. “Demon Supreme” utilises darker synths and a semi-industrial aesthetic to give the ol' Dragula a right good rear ending. It’s a touch repetitive but it’s got an energy to it and reminds me of POWERMAN 5000 in ways. “Lizzard Of Oz” houses more chugging riffs, with a strong electronic core sound, something which a more industrial metal unit might partake-in.  

“Skull And Bones (The Danger Zone)” repeats this seemingly Rob Zombie inspired instrumental direction, with it sounding aesthetically very similar. “Shake The Baby Silent” is top quality parenting advice it has to be said, Mr. Lordi collecting his dad of the year award over here, well done. Skip the bottle feed, jump straight to infanticide. It took seven albums but we do actually get our first actual stand-out highlight in the form of “Terror Extra-Terrestrial”. The intro spoils it a little bit, with its E.T parody segue, but we get a frankly quirky piece of synth-driven hard rock, and it’s honestly rather catchy. We ultimately finish up very ironically however, with the track “Anticlimax”...and I’m not even going to make any jokes here, the audio speaks for itself. After seven albums, completing this seventy-eight-track endurance test has to be rewarded in some aspect surely? Not in the slightest. 

Lordi tried something different here; they have to applauded for their creative ambition, that’s without question. What DOES need to be questioned though, is why the hell they couldn’t do seven concept EP’s instead of seven full bloody albums? They could have very easily cherry-picked specific highlights, and made a far more digestible, and more importantly, enjoyable listening experience. Seventy-eight tracks, allows for far, far too much filler, and truth be told, fodder. They managed to occasionally hit certain spots musically, and instrumentally to diversify these albums into their genre’s, which is the entire point OF “Lordiversity” as a concept, but vocally they just aren’t capable of really delivering; it’s very one-dimensional for the most part, and that grates over time.

In summary... Monstrous? Check. Mediocre? Also check. If concept albums are your thing, love anthologies and collecting box-sets, or simply are a die-hard Lordi fan, you'll likely enjoy this for what it is. If you specifically like a certain style or genre, feel free to sift through your own preferences accordingly, you MIGHT get something out of it, but, as a complete package, this is at a level of grandiosity Lordi really shouldn't be dabbling in. For me? This review is finally over...give me a hard rock hallelujah! [4]

What is there to say about 2020, that hasn't already been said? Within these reviews over the past nine months I've light-heartedly made reference to issues like Covid-19 and such, but let's not detract from the seriousness of the whole situation. As a calendar year, 2020 was one of the most difficult, frustrating, upsetting and confusing in recent history, and this isn't strictly down to Coronavirus...this time last year we were on the brink of World War 3! Politics has been a shambles, social injustice has been rife, the divide in both community spirit and the classes seemingly continues to grow, and generally speaking, the world is a complete mess. Luckily we've had music to keep us going, if not to keep us sane, and for that at least I am grateful. The images above showcase my personal highlights of 2020, grouped in categories covering pop, metal, EP's and general favourites, and it shows that, despite the state of the world, music flourishes. Music and the arts are SO important, as many of us learned during national lockdown, and we need to appreciate the people who dedicated their lives to creating that art SO much, because times like these prove we'd be lost without them. 

I mean, just looking at the cover art above, it's been as diverse a year as any. MILEY CYRUS embraced her inner rocker on her new album, having collaborated with the likes of BILLY IDOL and JOAN JETT. Groups like STEPS made an unexpected comeback showing they've still got it in an ever changing pop industry, as did MELANIE C. From a metal standpoint, PARADISE LOST prove they just get better with age, as they not only released one of the albums of their career, they also found themselves in the UK Top 40! Imagine that! Goth metal on Radio 1! It gives hope to newer acts like SOUTH OF SALEM who delivered a truly stunning debut album, and certify themselves as ones to watch for sure. There have also been plenty of superb EP's released over the past twelve months...especially VV. Ville Valo surprised everyone with his 3-track EP and HIM fans rejoiced at the new material, I for one certainly cannot wait to hear more from him. CHRISTINE AND THE QUEENS put emphasis on the art as their whole EP was turned into one big choreographed music video which was impressive, while I personally made some brilliant discoveries in the form of LUCIA & THE BEST BOYS and JACKIE. 

Finally then, my official albums of the year, and I was spoiled for choice to be fair. THE BIRTHDAY MASSACRE always deliver, they never release a bad album and I'm looking forward to catching up with Chibi on the rescheduled tour dates. MARILYN MANSON dropped his best album in years much to my delight, having found his last couple a little bit boring (Sorry Mazza!), GREY DAZE tugged at the heartstrings with a touching tribute to the late Chester Bennington, releasing unheard material from his pre-LINKIN PARK days, reminding us all how much we'll miss such a talented, brilliant human being. NINJA SEX PARTY on the other hand proved they remain one of the funniest groups around with their bonkers writing style, comedic lyricism and story-telling and wholesome attitude. Yes, 2020 has been a bit of a mess to say the least, but we've still got music, and as fans of that music, we've still got one another, and as a community, we need to hold on to that. With that said, below, is my official GTGC Spotify playlist of 2020, with 40 hand-picked tracks spanning the above records, and it is dedicated to my very good friend Scot 'JD' Rees, who is sadly no longer with us in body, but will forever be with us in heart and spirit. Whether he had a Jack & Coke in his hand, or his guitar, he was always laughing at something, and his energy for enjoyment was infectious. I will miss you Scot, and this compilation is for you. X

Remember the phenomenon that was ‘Chuck Norris Facts’? The man / minor deity can do so many astonishing yet equally absurd things, like, being able to make fire by rubbing ice cubes, or, being the only person able to kick you in the back of the face, or even being able to speak French…in Russian. I could go on (Literally I can read them for hours and laugh to myself quite contently) but it’s that last one that tediously links me to today’s band because I am unable to just, review things normally. Yes, allow me to introduce you to today’s band; L’HOMME ABSURDE.

Hailing from Moscow, Russia, yet with a French name that translates as ‘The Absurd Human’, L’Homme Absurde are a progressive post-hardcore five-piece, consisting of vocalist Alexey Slavin, guitarists Alexandr Safronov & Roman Savenkov, bassist Pavel Gorshkov and drummer Evgeny Loboda, and they’ve been gradually building their reputation since their formation in 2016. With their fusion of metalcore and melodic black metal, they hope to continue to spread their absurdity across Europe with their newest album “Belong”…but do they belong in my ears? Noob Heavy PR asked me to check it out…

The album opens up with “0” which is pretty appropriate given the way this album kicks off…it’s all about momentum, all is still as we get nothing but relaxed percussion and some semi-dreamscape acoustic instrumentation while the record comes to life, as it’s pulse strengthens,  but we suddenly find ourselves enveloped in a blanket of brutally tortured vocals and a more metallic approach in tone, despite its melodic retention. It gives us a sense of artistic drive and direction early on, for sure. First track proper then “Rot” capitalises on the surging blackened metal tendencies the band have by pummelling the listener with a barrage of semi-psychotic instrumentation. Equally melodic yet mauling; it summarises the bands sounds wonderfully.

This can be said of album highlight “Separation” too which takes an almost early post-punk direction with the initial guitars, before we break into more snarled vocals and post-hardcore riff work; this is arguably as catchy as things get over the course of these eight tracks, finding it’s home between the likes of KVELERTAK and MAN THE MACHETES. It’s up-beat and rocking, all the while groove rich and melodic, and a superb piece of modern metal. Elsewhere “Burn” and “Forsaken” continue this approach of searing blackened melodies while incorporating subtle doom atmospherics into the more traditional metal guitar work, before we eventually finish up on ”Sanctuary”. The semi-acoustic opening and soft vocals allowing for a sense of closure and finality to wind the mood down somewhat…or so we thought, as this too erupts into a visceral barrage of pained vocals at the tracks midway point, peaking with a final flurry, before the low-key instrumentation transitions right back into “0” and we appropriately come full circle, as the album essentially loops, which is cleverly done.

Overall, while Russia isn’t exactly prominent in the world metal scene in terms of household names, L’Homme Absurde are clearly equipped to throw down with some of their more established Scandinavian neighbours. Blackened metalcore may sound a touch niche on paper but there’s enough here in terms of subtle variety to at least warrant checking this out for most fans of alternative heavy music. It’s a solid album and one that could potentially find them larger audiences across Europe, and to suggest otherwise would be, well, absurd. [6]

OK so, back in May I debuted a new blog feature which I dubbed the "Unlucky Dip", where I take a break from reviewing full length albums and EP's, to give the singles a chance. It not only allows me to cover a wider variety of artists and genres in one swoop, but it reminds me of albums that will be coming out, and helps me clear more of my never ending barrage of emails. Last time around I was a little mean to one or two of the artists, but as I did point out, this feature IS a sort of cross between speed dating and a comedy roast. Luckily for these seven new artists I generally like all of the tracks I'm about to talk about, which is rare...unluckily for you however this may not be as much of an enjoyable read as the last one! Anyway, with that said, let's get into some music.

I'd like to kick things off with some genuine positivity and excitement. THE SOUNDS are one of the bands I can thank Bam Margera for getting me into way back in the day, and while I was happy to have them back with their EP "The Tales That We Tell" in 2017, we haven't had a full album from Maja and co in seven years!

"Safe And Sound" is the latest single, taken from the highly anticipated new album "Things We Do For Love", which drops June 12th. Originally planned for a May release but put back due to Covid-19, their blend of lightly electronic tinged indie rock 'n' roll sounds as distinct and fresh as ever here...I guess you could say they haven't missed a Tony the beat! I'm very much looking forward to this album and you can expect to find it in my end of year lists for sure.

This one was a submission from the people over at Pop Rush Music and as far as I can tell, this is a stand alone single, as there's been no mention to me of any releases to follow this up. The single in question; "Hunters & Wolves" is by an artist by the name of JORDAN LAKE. Not to be confused with the reservoir, Jordan was born in North Carolina and found his love for singing very early on.

At the age of 4 he became a church singer at his local parish and has had a passion for performing ever since. Now older and having relocated to the West coast, Jordan is writing mature, soulful and emotive pop music that in it's own ways bridges the likes of ADAM LAMBERT with RAG 'N' BONE MAN. Listen below and let me know what you think!

Well..this escalated quickly! GAEREA are a self-confessed cathartic black metal outfit from Portugal, and they were brought to my attention by the folk over at Season Of Mist. 

"Null" is the first track to be taken off their up-coming third album "Limbo" which is released on July 24th and if this track is anything to go by, the six-track 50-minute album is going to be one hell of a journey. There are European tour plans in place for the beginning of 2021, though they are scheduled to play a UK exclusive show in London on October 31st at the Nabucca, which you may want to keep an eye on if you're a fan of black and death metal, as it's part of the Subterranean Manifestation II line-up. Hopefully it goes ahead, and I'll say it again...fuck Covid-19.

This one is arguably the weakest of the seven tracks I'm going through today but that's purely on account the other 6 tracks, as this is still a fun little single and I'm actually not trying to be mean for once. 360 PHOENIX FLIP is the new (Albeit convoluted) moniker by which Mark Lovett now goes by.

Combining his love of skate-punk and artists such as NOFX and RUFIO, with his already experienced background in song production and EDM, he brings us his debut single "Pyromaniac" and the best way to describe it I believe would be, somewhere between OWL CITY and REGGIE & THE FULL EFFECT. Make of that what you will, but I like this and I look forward to what else he has in store. Maybe you'll find him in the new Tony Hawk remastered game soundtrack? At this time of writing I have no links to share with you, as the SoundCloud link was private...sorry.

Now this...this one is fucking bold. GHOST, who you may be familiar with as arguably the biggest rising metal / alternative rock band on the planet, helped cement their status with the song "Square Hammer" from the "Popestar" EP. BEFORE SUNDAY, are a London based duo who have only recently released their debut EP, yet here we find them covering Ghost...and the track isn't even a part of their EP!

Yes thanks to Angels PR, the duo have been in touch with label-mate Marianna from PROJECT RENEGADE and other talented musician friends, to collaborate on this lock-down cover. To be fair, instrumentally at least, they've done the song justice as it barely strays from the original in tone, it's quite a by numbers cover, but naturally they aren't replacing Tobias on vocals, so that's where they differ, although they've stayed true to the original video too in their own ways, taking limitations into account. It's a brave cover, but no real complaints for execution. 

In case you're wondering why there is no art work for this single, it's because the band didn't supply any jpeg files of the artwork. Plenty of photo's of the band, sure, but none of the artwork. The image included in their press kit isn't usable sadly as I was unable to separate and save it to file. Could I message them and ask for a jpeg of the image? I could, of course I could...but it's really not worth the effort.

Anyway, JULIPER SKY are an up-and-coming indie-pop outfit based out of Manchester, UK, and having already released their debut EP this year entitled "Visions Of A New Age", they continue to release separate singles. Opinions vary as to how effective and efficient this is from a marketing stand point...on one hand you can keep fresh content coming and keep up the exposure and relevance...on the other hand, and this is something I believe personally, is that it's annoying and I'd rather you just keep the material for the 2nd EP...let's be honest most of the tracks are going to end up on the debut album anyway, so many artists do it, and I just find it all pointless myself. I digress..."Afterglow" is the kind of light pop-based indie that might appeal to fans of BLOSSOMS for example. You'll have to take my word for it though as again, it comes out on June 26th, and I have no Bandcamp, Spotify or Youtube links to share with you. I might review the EP, give you a better idea.

Today then we finish up on this absolute gem, and another genuine bit of excitement. MUSHROOMHEAD have been going damn near thirty years now and having gone through a couple of line-up changes, they still have an incredibly prolific yet criminally underrated back catalog of albums. 

Having always faced criticism for being SLIPKNOT knock-offs, they never hit the heights they deserved to, but hopefully that will change on their upcoming new album "A Wonderful Life"; their first since 2014! The latest single promoting the album; "The Heresy" see's the real debut of new full time vocalist Ms. Jackie, as well a returning J Mann to bring some welcome nostalgia and heritage to their sound. The clean female vocals add a new dynamic which works really with their heavy, dystopian, underground progressive grunge metal style, and the political message of the single simply adds relevance. I cannot wait for this album, which comes out June 19th via Napalm Records.

This isn’t a review as such…but more of a call to arms if you will. Now, while I’ve touched on the current Coronavirus pandemic in recent reviews in a predominantly light-hearted manner, or at least trying to make light of the situation to maybe try to boost morale, it is in so many aspects in fact, a VERY serious situation. Businesses are shutting down, people are losing their jobs, people are losing their means to support their families, hell; people are fucking DYING! In such a time of need for many in an age of advanced communication and technology, some of us have never felt so far apart and, given the unprecedented nature of this global pandemic, it’s a hard realisation.

While the government (Here in the UK at least) is doing what it can to help certain businesses cover expenses while the country is on lock down, not everyone is fortunate enough to benefit from such subsidies and this is where both you and your local music venues come in. Small and independent venues have had a hard enough time over the last couple of years as it is, with several having to close doors up and down the country for financial reasons, or for dodgy housing development projects etc, so the last thing they need is a forced closure due to some Asian-ass virus because some dude in China did an Ozzy Osbourne with an infected bat.

I can’t say with certainty that your local venue is doing the same right now (Though if they are I urge you to support in any which way you can) but FUEL ROCK CLUB in Cardiff is one of the clubs that would be incredibly grateful for your support.  The award winning bar/venue situated in Womanby Street in the Welsh capital naturally relies on its punters and gig goers to pay the bills and the wages…but under forced closure, they face difficult times. Luckily, while we may not be currently able to attend the club in person, we can still help and support the club during this testing time, thanks to a new compilation album.

XIII PROMOTIONS based out of Cardiff have reached out to 30 bands and artists who have played, performed or promoted at the club, to piece together a 30-track compilation entitled “Rock Down: A Fuel Rock Club Benefit Compilation”. Available on Bandcamp as a digital download for £7.50, all proceeds raised will go towards ensuring the club doesn’t fall onto harder times that it’s already been put under, by contributing to venue upkeep etc while they have no custom. It’s a hell of an eclectic compilation, ranging from black and death metal, to punk, post-rock, blues, funk and even electronica, showcasing a plethora of genres represented by multiple scenes, who all support Fuel.  The link to Fuel’s Facebook is below, so if you can, go and buy some Fuel merch through their official channels, and the bandcamp link is also included. My personal favourites include tracks by GLASS HEART and BONDAGE FAIRIES…but there’s literally something for everyone here. Go check it out, it’s for a wholesome cause.

Aren’t massacres just the best? They come in a whole assortment of colours, shapes and sizes…Birthday Massacres, Texas Chainsaw Massacres, Slumber Party Massacres, Pizza Girl Massacres… (I could go on, I just had a field day on IMDb) and ooh boy, Columbine was a work of art wasn’t it! (I jest; shooting up children is frowned upon in the UK) However let’s be honest, while alternative music and horror movies may overuse the word to the point it’s almost desensitized, it’s the very real incidents such as Columbine that, capture the most intrigue and make for some of the most fascinating stories. This brings us to today’s band…THE MASSACRE CAVE.

While at first glance the name could very well be taken from yet another low budget slasher movie, The Massacre Cave are in fact a 4-piece alternative metal band from and around The Isle Of Eigg, Scotland. Situated in the Inner Hebrides, Eigg is a small island with an equally small population, but while it lacks in mass…it makes up for in mass murder, and this is where they get their name. According to clan tradition, way back in 1577, around 395 people were suffocated and killed while sheltering from the MacLoed clan inside the Cave Of Frances. The MacLoed’s, seeking revenge following a fall-out, found the islanders in hiding and started fires at the caves entrance, asphyxiating everyone inside, virtually wiping out the islands population. Or so they say. Might be a load of bollocks, who knows?

Anyway, history lesson over, The Massacre Cave (Who consist of guitarists/vocalists Joe and Ben Cormack, bassist Jodie Bremaneson and drummer Pete Colquhoun) originally formed in 2005, quickly becoming recognised within independent circles and within Scottish national tabloids for their intense sound and live shows, especially their breakout single “Behemoth”. Now, in 2020 we find them releasing their brand new album “Godlust” through Red Death Records…Joe sent me an email asking me to check it out…so let’s do just that before they send a clan after me!

The 8-track mini album opens up with “We Own The Sun” and after some gradually built, galloping riffs, we’re met with a wall of assertive percussion, channelling a rich progressive metal aesthetic with the off-kilter, rhythmic yet, technical fret-work. Vocally intense; combining an almost southern groove with guttural growling, making for a tumultuous opening. “From The Mountains” transitions in then nicely and there seems to be a little more structure to the instrumentation; the guitars seem that bit more regimented and disciplined, while vocally it’s as though we’ve taken influence from the likes of early SATYRICON in places. There’s the subtlest hint of black metal adding flavour to the track while still utilising traditional thrash influences, all combining to create that aforementioned progressive sound.

The blackened influences continue on the intro to “Tetramethrin” before the gruff vocals take the track down a more sludge-metal avenue, yet there are glimmers of the likes of Jaz Coleman of KILLING JOKE sprinkled here and there, there’s a fair variety of styles layered throughout these tracks in all honesty, making for an interesting listen. We have a couple of sub-three-minute offerings too starting with “Godfrey”, and it’s no more than a quaint little acoustic-led instrumental, breaking up proceedings nicely I will admit, while “Red Death” capitalises on those early thrash qualities, benefiting from some crisp recording, the solo here too just the cherry on top of quite the enjoyable track.

Finally then we do end up on the title track and again, we have a bountiful blend of genres, styles and sounds that fleet between progressive and traditional metal, ambient yet, avant-garde experimentation. It’s got some great hooks and balances it’s gentler melodies with its more crunching guitar work really well, ending the album on a positive note. Essentially The Massacre Cave tick a variety of boxes and if you enjoy your music somewhere between, say, early OPETH and MASTODON then you may find ample enjoyment over the course of these eight tracks. Despite living in the arse end of nowhere they’ve accumulated a smörgåsbord of influences, resulting in a colourful approach to progressive metal. Now if you’ll excuse me…I have the sudden urge to watch The Descent. [6]

2019 has like most years, been a strong year for new music. It doesn't matter what genre we're talking about; it's been a year of triumphant returns, exploratory and experimental albums and EP's and an overall win for you and me, the consumer. Over the past 12 months, in between changes in my personal life with relationships and employment, undertaking a completely new job with no prior training or background, I've still done my best to keep on top of new music, more specifically my reviews, despite my own mental health which I don't really talk about much. With all of that said, I've still managed to listen to a total of 274 brand new EP's and albums in 2019 and out of all of those, I've managed to whittle down that number to a categorised series of Best Of lists. Ranging from EP's specifically, to pop music, metal and my own personal favourite releases of the year, I've managed to expand my listening experiences and broaden my horizons to allow myself to grow as a reviewer, and these albums sum that up quite well in my opinion. While I've already shared these lists on social media, such as my Twitter ( @GavinJGriffiths ) my Instagram ( @gavthegothicchav ) and my Facebook page ( www.facebook.com/GTGCReviews ) I wanted to give a more in-depth look at my choices for the year, and my individual scoring of each record...essentially doing a Dave Meltzer star-rating system for each individual track. I hope you find my choices interesting, and as usual, I've compiled my official Spotify end of year playlist which I've included at the bottom of this post for your listening pleasure. Here's to 2020 where all of this starts again...until next time...have a happy new year, and, A LITTLE BIT OF THE BUBBLY! 

20] KILO KISH - "Redux" EP - 1.60/5
19] HEAVY LUNGS - "Measure" EP - 1.60/5
18] NAUT - "Semele" EP - 1.66/5
17] INTERPOL - "A Fine Mess" EP 1.80/5
16] POPPY - "Choke" EP - 1.80/5
15] SODOM - "Out Of The Fontline Trench" EP - 1.80/5
14] YUNGBLUD - "The Underrated Youth" EP - 1.83/5
13] BENNY BASSETT - "Words For Yesterday" EP - 1.83/5
12] 8MM - "Heart Shaped Hell" EP - 2.00/5
11] MILEY CYRUS - "She Is Coming" EP - 2.00/5
10] CATHEDRAL IN FLAMES - "Children Of The Blackest Hole" EP - 2.20/5
09] SKYLAR GREY - "Angel With Tattoos" EP - 2.20/5
08] SUN ARCANA - "Just Another Dream Away" EP - 2.20/5
07] PALAYE ROYALE - "Massacre, The New American Dream" EP - 2.25/5
06] YEAR OF THE LOCUST - "Year Of The Locust" EP - 2.25/5
05] RXPTRS - "I" EP - 2.40/5
04] LIL NAS X - "7" EP - 2.50/5
03] HAWTHORN AVENUE - "Wildfire" EP - 2.50/5
02] HER DESPAIR - "Exorcisms Of Eroticism" EP - 2.50/5
01] SOME VILLAINS - "Outliars" EP - 2.75/5

20] P!NK - "Hurts 2 B Human" - 1.53/5
19] BASTILLE - "Doom Days" - 1.54/5
18] TOM WALKER - "What A Time To Be Alive" - 1.57/5
17] BILLIE EILISH - "When We All Fall Asleep Where Do We Go" - 1.57/5
16] EMMA BUNTON - "My Happy Place" - 1.60/5
15] POST MALONE - "Hollywood's Bleeding" - 1.64/5
14] BLACKPINK - "In Your Area" - 1.66/5
13] KERLI - "Shadow Works" - 1.66/5
12] MIKA - "My Name Is Michael Holbrook" - 1.69/5
11] ALICE MERTON - "Mint" - 1.81/5
10] SIGRID - "Sucker Punch" - 1.83/5
09] LEWIS CAPALDI - "Divinely Inspired To A Hellish Extent" - 1.83/5
08] MARINA - "Love + Hate" - 1.87/5
07] DAVE - "Psychodrama" - 1.90/5
06] BUSTED - Half Way There" - 1.90/5
05] WILDWOOD KIN - "Wildwood Kin" - 2.10/5
04] WILL YOUNG - "Lexicon" - 2.16/5
03] JAMES BLUNT - "Once Upon A Mind" - 2.18/5
02] HANTE. - "Fierce" - 2.23/5
01] SCANDROID - "The Light" - 2.28/5

20] KHAIDIAN - "Penumbra" - 2.00/5
19] INCITE - "Built To Destroy" - 2.00/5
18] LEACH - "Hymns For The Hollow" - 2.00/5
17] SWALLOW THE SUN - "When A Shadow Is Forced Into The Light" - 2.00/5
16] HEARTSICK - "Sleep Cycles" - 2.07/5
15] CRYSTAL LAKE - "Helix" - 2.08/5
14] AS I LAY DYING - "Shaped By Fire" - 2.08/5
13] KILLSWITCH ENGAGE - "Atonement" - 2.09/5
12] FALLUJAH - "Undying Light" - 2.10/5
11] AFTERLIFE - "Breaking Point" - 2.10/5
10] THROUGH THE NOISE - "Dualism" - 2.11/5
09] KAAMOS WARRIORS - "Ikuisen Talven Sarastus" - 2.12/5
08] ABIGAIL WILLIAMS - "Walk Beyond The Dark" - 2.14/5
07] AMON AMARTH - "Berzerker" - 2.16/5
06] MEGADETH - "Warheads On Foreheads" - 2.20/5
05] SOILWORK - "Verkligheten" - 2.33/5
04] DEMON HUNTER - "War" - 2.40/5
03] CORRODED - "Bitter" - 2.41/5
02] ROTTING CHRIST - "The Heretics" - 2.41/5
​01] CHILDREN OF BODOM - "Hexed" - 2.45/5

20] RISKEE & THE RIDICULE - "Body Bag Your Scene" - 2.33/5
19] DEMON HUNTER - "Peace" - 2.40/5
18] THE DIRTY YOUTH - "Utopia" - 2.40/5
17] DREAMSTATE - "Primrose Path" - 2.40/5
16] THE WRAITH - "Gloom Ballet" - 2.41/5
15] NORTHLANE - "Alien" - 2.45/5
14] D-A-D - "A Prayer For The Loud" - 2.45/5
13] PAPA ROACH - "Who Do You Trust?" - 2.50/5
12] SUM 41 - "Order In Decline" - 2.50/5
11] IN FLAMES - "I, The Mask" - 2.50/5
10] WHILE SHE SLEEPS - "So What?" - 2.54/5
09] BAD RELIGION - "Age Of Unreason" - 2.57/5
08] LINDEMANN - "F & M" - 2.69/5
07] WEEZER - "Teal Album" - 2.75/5
06] MOTIONLESS IN WHITE - "Disguise" - 2.81/5
05] RAMMSTEIN - "Rammstein" - 2.90/5
04] YONAKA - "Don't Wait 'Til Tomorrow" - 3.00/5
03] LACUNA COIL - "Black Anima" - 3.18/5
02] THE 69 EYES - "West End" - 3.27/5
01] BLAQK AUDIO - "Only Things We Love" - 3.33/5

The last time we caught up with DEMOCRATUS, the South Wales metal conglomerate (Consisting of vocalist Steve Jenkins, guitarists Joey Watkins and Rich Rees, bassist Stu Rake and drummer Zak Skane) had just released their 2018 debut EP “Starting Again”…and it was in all fairness rather apropos. Having formed out of the ashes of their previous collective bands such as COUNTERHOLD and CANNIBAL GOD, the five-piece really were starting again, and truth be told it did them the world of good, as 2018 saw them off to a frankly superb start.

Not only was the EP received well but they managed to bag themselves a slot at Bloodstock Festival courtesy of their coveted Metal To The Masses competition, cementing their status as one’s to watch on the unsigned metal scene (Aided by some determined self-promotion). With their profile rising and with the band finding themselves expanding their live audience venue by venue, it’s perfect timing for them to drop their 2nd EP “Damnation”, to really strike while the iron is hot. The band recently asked me to check it out ahead of its release this December, and I’ll be damned if I don’t!

The EP opens up with “Is This Fear” and immediately we’re swept up in this surging yet harmonious, grand cinematic instrumental intro; we’re literally seconds in and already we find the band’s sound has evolved as they experiment with their approach. It doesn’t take long however before the metal kicks in and once again you can hear a diverse array of influences in their style, ranging from classic melodic metal, to thrash to death-infused, polyrhythmic brutality. It yo-yo’s between the calm and almost carnivorous quite well and the song is well-balanced, kicking this EP off nicely.

Follow up track “BTK” however slows things RIGHT down and the transition is almost jarring. The subdued plucking of guitar strings and restrained percussion is almost creepy as it sets a foreboding tone, until the track comes to life with a more regimented style of death metal. The riffs are semi-sluggish as they chug along with a doom-like sensibility, while the vocal delivery is almost bullet pointed. A totally different approach to our opener but while not as entertaining, it does highlight that diversity in their influences all the more. The title track returns to a more traditional metal approach instrumentally, though retaining a distinct heaviness, while the bulk of the vocals stick to guttural growling, chorus aside (Especially that impressive note Steve hits at the tracks climax), and you can hear the bands admiration for the likes of AMON AMARTH and INSOMNIUM. Finally then, closing track “Dead Without Dying” rounds things up with another weighted, borderline somnolent display of riffs that’s sadly more than a little anti-climactic.

What’s clear is that the band are unafraid to try to concoct their own brand of melodic death metal, still dabbling in an array of genres, still finding room to experiment a little more. The trouble however in doing that is Democratus are still seemingly trying to find their identity. There ARE more signs here that they are in fact heading more down the route of heavier, death-inspired metal; this EP seems angrier in presentation and delivery, but they aren’t 100% there yet. As with their debut, the weakest aspects really are the cleaner vocals and to be fair they’ve restricted that aspect of their sound here, with less power metal vocalisation, and really that suits them a lot more. With the bands profile growing show by show, coupled with the bands passion and determination, Democratus are absolutely on the right path and making all the right steps, but this path is a long and winding one, and their journey has only just begun. [6]

So what’s YOUR favourite type of knot? Is it a Half Hitch? Perhaps a Bowline or a Sheet Bend? Of course not, we all know its SLIPKNOT, and with bloody good reason! The Iowan nonet started life in the mid-to-late 90’s and from day one they practically turned the world on its head, over time becoming arguably the biggest modern metal band on the planet. Between the mystery of their masked persona’s and the brutality of their early crossover genre-mashing, it didn’t take them long to get noticed, and they helped revolutionise alternative music as we know it. Sure, there have been trials and tribulations along the way, but the band have always bounced back stronger than ever…proven emphatically on their last album; 2014’s “.5: The Gray Chapter”.

Following the death of bassist Paul Gray, the band found themselves in purgatory, and the resulting album was both the closure of one chapter of Slipknot, a nod to Paul and an appreciation of everything preceding it, but also the beginning of a new era; a rebirth, and all signs pointed towards a brutal, unrelenting future. What exactly did that future have in store? Well aside from keeping things ticking over with festival appearances and a live album, the band did initially return in 2018 with a rare stand-alone single “All Out Life”, reminding fans that they were still very much active creatively, with the track itself acting as a rallying cry, encouraging everyone to live in the now and not dwell on the past. This only got fans excited for what was to come…and what came was this; “We Are Not Your Kind”. What direction were Slipknot heading in in this new chapter of their storied career? I challenge you to all-out fucking listen with me…

We open up with “Insert Coin” and we’re greeted with a strangely ominous intro-track fuelled by semi-retro arcade style synths that meander gently, as the instrumentation washes over you with a calming motion. It’s as though we’re on the title screen here getting ready to press play and dive into this brand new game as Corey says in a chilling manner “I’m counting all the killers..” and it’s an interesting start. First track proper then “Unsainted” gets the album underway properly and what an opener…from the initially haunting children’s choir it gradually builds in atmosphere and intensity until it explodes into a frenzy of blistering vocals with pummelling riffs and percussion. It carries on from the previous album in terms of delivery; blending visceral verses with a clean, hook-rich chorus. It’s a powerful track.

From here on in however, the album gets VERY interesting…recent single “Birth Of The Cruel” slows things down with a more methodical riff and plenty of tinny percussion. Vocally clean for the most part until Corey lets rip during the chorus segments, countered by Sid Wilson’s trademark scratching harking back to the bands earlier days. “Death Because Of Death” is our first interlude and takes on an almost hypnotic tribal tone; simple and repetitive before transitioning  straight into “Nero Forte”, instantly waking up the listener with more classic Slipknot riffs and up-tempo lyricism, again bridging the gap between the now and the bands early years. Another album highlight, “Critical Darling”, continues on with the “…Gray Chapter” aesthetic with plenty of key-changes, vocal switch-up techniques and allows for a variety of sensations, fluctuating effortlessly between harsh and harmonious.

​This fluctuation is a reoccurring theme throughout the whole album in all honesty; it zigs where you think it’ll zag and vice versa…”Red Flag” is a traditionally blistering onslaught, fuelled by a frantic pacing and old-school aesthetic, again harking back to the Knot’s earlier days, while interlude “What’s Next” comes across as actual elevator music! Like, seriously lads what the fuck is next? Where else can you take this? “Spiders” houses an almost Halloween-esque piano lead allowing for a generally creepier vibe, bordering on polyrhythmic in places; it’s got a subtle prog delivery, before we eventually end on promotional single “Solway Firth”. Coming full circle from the intro, we count all the killers over a typically bombastic masked-metal approach that bridges gaps between modern era and the “…Subliminal Verses” days.

Ultimately what can be said about the Iowan’ nine in 2019? Their groove-heavy, pulverising metal is still there in abundance and coupled with their nu-metal origins, thrash sensibilities and Corey’s ability to deliver a mainstream alternative anthem, Slipknot are as Slipknot as ever here but MORE. There are no real definitive hits like “Dead Memories” or “Snuff” to appeal to the wider audience…fuck no; if anything they’ve gone the opposite direction. Sure there are some great hooks throughout this record, but the presentation here showcases so much experimentation and a lack of fucks given this is arguably Slipknot’s most prog-metal album to date. It doesn’t settle for a style, not even Slipknot’s own, and that’s where it deserves praise. We all know Slipknot can and will deliver, it’s practically a given these days, but they still opted to tear up their own rule-book and go crazy. “We Are Not Your Kind” is a metaphorical middle finger to not only the fans that just want Iowa 2.0, but also metal in general. It might be more experimental to what you are used to from the Clown and co…but fuck me this is a Slipknot album and a half. Insert another coin mate, I want another go at this…[7]

There are many important questions in life…like, what came first; the chicken or the egg? What colour would Michael Jackson pick playing chess? (I jest, we know it doesn’t matter if your black or white) How much wood would a wood-chuck chuck if a wood-chuck was Chuck Norris? But even more important than all of that…who is the biggest metal band in the world? Immediately I can envisage swarms of you arguing over METALLICA and IRON MAIDEN, and to be fair they’re great shouts, but here I’m going to throw another, more than credible, and definitely deserving band into the mix; RAMMSTEIN.

These German industrial-metal titans originally formed in 1994 and ever since, all they’ve done is (Without trying to put a Nazi spin on this) conquered the world one arena, one stadium at a time. From their intense, eyebrow raising cover of DEPECHE MODE’s “Stripped”, to the beautifully haunting “Sonne”, right up the gloriously R-Rated “Pussy”, Till Lindemann and the lads have never shied away from controversy, and this can also be said for their live shows. Whether it’s boiling poor keyboardist Flake alive in a cauldron, ejaculating spectacularly into the audience via a giant mechanical penis, or generally just their unfathomable amount of pyrotechnics, Rammstein put on one of if not THE best live metal shows on the planet, and with their new technically untitled album, things are only getting bigger. With that said…let’s get ready to abuse Google-translate as we check out “Rammstein”.

We open up with “Deutschland” and in gloriously typical Rammer’s fashion; their first new track in a decade is an ode to Germany. Well, to a degree. From the steady rise in intensity of the frenetic synths, to the jolting riffs, to the eventual anthemic, regimented metal flurry, it simply excites from its very first chords. Lyrically plodding for the most part, but musically this is just captivating…it’s so good to have them back and this is a classic start. Following this then is the album’s first major highlight “Radio”…again; we start things off with some bouncing synths, before we get some traditionally crunching riffs. The balance here between the electronica, which, reminds me of old-school Moogs, and the hard rock is perfect and it’s an up-tempo little number with a seriously addictive chorus. Coming back to the topic of controversy, the track touches upon Nazi propaganda by means of censorship during the 30’s and 40’s. German citizens were subject to strict control of what they had access to during the time and here they touch upon that.

The first half of this album is quite heavy on the electronic front if I’m honest, with "Ausländer" being another stand-out track. Another up-beat offering bordering on dance-inspired, the techno elements are pulsing, while the track pounds away in a well delivered crossover style. Essentially meaning ‘foreigner’, lyrically it’s very ‘Jack The Lad’ as he sings of being a man of the world and a ladies man, heavily insinuating a sense of promiscuity. Speaking of which…”Sex” I guess you could say comes (Behave) right afterwards. More chilling synths followed by a groove-rich, almost southern-metal guitar tone and yet another brilliantly catchy chorus, it’s all about fiery passion and giving in to lust…however it’s no “Pussy”.

The second half of the album does admittedly slow down a touch but it certainly retains its talking points…none more so than “Puppe”. A dark yet equally wonderful and interesting track that’s based on an old poem; meaning ‘Doll’, it’s all hushed and subdued as Till sings of the prostitution of a sister character, while their younger sibling in care is forced to hear everything from the room next door, before the track erupts into an angry, scathing barrage of vocals, the result of a seemingly troubled upbringing. It’s a powerful track! “Tattoo” is another hard-rocking number that touches upon the duality that is the pleasure and the pain of self-expression, before “Hallomann” rounds things up in a frankly quite creepy manner. Remember when your mum and dad told you not to talk to strangers? At least I hope they did…but yeah this song reinforces that notion! Singing about picking up a little girl; no talking, just get in…presumably the van? One can assume sweets were offered? Promises of trips to the seaside, wanting her to sing and dance…this is all very questionable but still another deeply interesting track. I might be reading into it completely wrong for all I know…maybe Rammstein took Madeleine McCann? Ok I’m joking naturally, but it’s an odd one. Regardless, what we have here is an album that may have been ten years in the making, but oh how the time-off has played into Rammsteins favour; they sound fresh as a daisy. The weight of the guitars, the chilling synths, the dark lyricism…Rammstein are still unafraid to push buttons yet they continue to pull in bigger and bigger crowds. An outstanding come-back this…TO DEUTSCHLAND! [8]

Everyone loves a mystery; something to wrap your grey matter around and one of the most infamous mysteries of them all, is the case of Jack The Ripper. His horrific murder-spree across London in the late 19th century is known around the world and is arguably the most notorious unsolved crime case in history, and despite numerous theories and arguments claiming to have it cracked, to this day still, nobody knows his (Or her) identity. While the ripper case may have captured the imaginations of many artists over the years, such as SCREAMING LORD SUTCH or MARY KELLY (One of the very first reviews on this blog as it happens, way back in 2014), it wouldn’t be the only unsolved murder to influence something musical…have you heard about The Bodominjärvi Murders?

Back in 1960, Lake Bodom, situated near Espoo in Finland would become synonymous with an almost Friday The 13th style massacre, as four teenagers who were camping near its shore, were brutally attacked in their tents. Three of them died with multiple stab wounds and blunt force traumas, while only one survived with severe but non-fatal injuries. The survivor in question, Nils Gustafsson has faced charges in the years that have passed, but there has never been enough evidence for a full conviction, and the case remains unsolved. History lesson over, and though while not a well-known cold-case here in the UK, metal fans will instantly recognise the name and make the connection to one of Finland’s finest melodic death metal exports; CHILDREN OF BODOM. The Finns have been peddling their extreme yet elegant metal, inspired by those killings, since the mid 90’s and here still in 2019 they’ve released their 10th studio album “Hexed”…let’s cast our ears upon it, as it tries to cast it’s spell upon us…

The album open’s up rather impatiently if I’m honest with “This Road”, and what I mean by that is for once there’s virtually no introduction or build up; it’s straight into the fucking riffs and there’s no messing around here. It’s classic COB with Alexi snarling his way around every syllable while the subtle keyboards sift between the relentless onslaught of crunching guitar and percussion. There IS melody here but it’s minimal, almost an afterthought, and in places it stylistically takes on an almost SLAYER-inspired tone; an unforgiving start this. If you WERE looking for more melody mind you then “Under Grass And Clover” has you covered as the synths are FAR more prominent…the track is incredibly up-beat and it’s got a great, simplistic instrumental hook, while the track as a whole takes on a more power-metal sound overall…it’s a definite album highlight.

“Glass Houses” continues the pummelling with more frantic fast-paced metal delivery amidst Alexi’s traditionally raspy vocals…the title track utilises more of that old-school trash metal influence in both its intro and general delivery, somewhat alternating with spats of almost symphonic metal. “Platitudes And Barren Words” is a genuinely superb piece of catchy, synth-driven metal; arguably as accessible as this album gets especially with some of Alexi’s less-aggravated vocals being on offer, while “Kick In A Spleen” provides one of the most equally specific yet random song titles I’ve ever come across…I mean, why the spleen? Who’s spleen is it exactly? And if anything, why not use a knife or other instrument? Let’s be honest a spleen is a pretty fucking obscure target! Why use your foot?! We’re talking Chuck Norris levels of precision here!

​The rest of the album is pretty much by numbers and it’s hard for that to not come across as derogatory…while a lot of bands over time find themselves applying a copy and paste formula from album to album, depending on their longevity of course, a lot of them become stagnant. COB do have their style and aside from the recording and production quality here compared to their early days, their writing style is more or less the same, they have their little niche…BUT…such is with COB, their style IS very much their own and distinct in its own right, and few bands manage to blend the same level of chaos and charm as these feral Finns. “Hexed” doesn’t exactly leave the listener entranced, but it’s undeniably a quality metal album from start to finish. Now that that’s listened to, who fancies a camping trip in Espoo? I know of this beautiful lake…[7]
​

When I utter the word ‘Gothenburg’, I can guarantee that you’ll know what I’m referring to…you’ve got this already haven’t you? Fucking damn right I’m talking about the Crazy Frog! No honestly, before I get into this review I have to remind each and every one of you that we collectively allowed the Crazy Frog; that…irritating, frankly cancerous, poorly animated and apparently Swedish cunt-nugget to not only be a thing, but ACTUALLY TOP THE CHARTS! I’m ashamed of us as a species. I digress…I just found out that the Crazy Frog did indeed originate in Gothenburg and had a mild PTSD episode.

I say this though with relevance as taking this seriously now, Gothenburg as we all know it is, for want of a better description, a Mecca for all things melodic death metal. Everyone from AT THE GATES to AVATAR have emerged from this epicenter of Swedish metal, which bring us to today’s band, and arguably one of the biggest of them all; IN FLAMES. Over their near thirty-year career to date they’ve delivered some of the finest melodic death metal albums to ever puncture our ears, from their seminal work on “Colony” which paved their way back in the 90’s, through to the Billboard bothering successes of “Reroute To Remain” and “Come Clarity” especially, In Flames have always been a reliable source of maelstrom…until recently that is. Back in 2016 the band released “Battles” and despite being a decent record generally, it irked many fans with its sense of pop-record production. Can they redeem themselves in the eyes of those same fans? 2019 sees them return as they channel their inner Stanley Ipkiss on “I, The Mask”…let’s check it out.

The album opens up with “Voices” and after the brief, slow build of a repetitive guitar fill that gradually rises in pitch and key, we find ourselves immersed in the familiar sounds of their heavier riffs and subtle synth elements. Vocalist Andes Fridén delivers a particularly run of the mill performance, switching from his usual raspy snarls into a more melodic vocal for the chorus. It’s a fairly standard affair, textbook In Flames in 2nd gear for the most part though Bjorn Gelotte’s solo is a nice inclusion; it’s a safe start. The title track follows up and to be fair this picks up the pace aplenty and there’s a lot more urgency here; with it’s almost thrash-based musical approach coupled with a hook-laden chorus it provides the listener with a truly up-tempo, enjoyable track and gets the album underway properly.

Elsewhere highlights include “(This Is Our) House” which combines anthemic gang vocals and a hard rocking rhythm with almost prog-inspired key changes, which includes Anders vocals; ranging from soaring melody and an emotive clean delivery to a sudden baritone, giving the track additional character. The band haven’t completely left behind the accessibility of the more pop-orientated production from their previous record however…”We Will Remember” despite its crunching hard-rock riffs carries with it a predominantly euphonious tone and it’s really easy listening, before the sudden surprise that is our closing track “Stay With Me”. This is essentially a power ballad and totally juxtaposes the album altogether…with the acoustic guitar, sweet harmonies and Anders surprisingly impassioned, heart-wrenching vocal display; it’s unquestionably a beautiful track and is in its own unique right, the best thing on this record.

Overall over the course of these twelve tracks, the album itself isn’t poor; it’s just for the most part In Flames by numbers. The Swede’s have always been able to deliver the goods over a 13-album discography now and I guess you could say there is the safety of familiarity within their brand of metal, which they do well…but it’s when you’ve got tracks like the aforementioned ballad, it makes you wonder why they haven’t done MORE of that? This is exactly the kind of track that builds bridges between not just genres but audience demographics, and dare I say it, mainstream success? The idea of a 30 year old melodic death metal band delivering such a genuinely sweet song is a mind-blowing concept, but In Flames have ALWAYS been a quality outfit…if anything just genre pigeon-holed. If the likes of BRING ME THE HORIZON can switch from death-core to getting a number one UK album in a country run by chavs and TOWIE outcasts, then on this evidence, In Flames are EASILY capable of being a lot more successful in the eyes of the wider mainstream audience. It’s just a shame it’s preceded and ultimately weighed down by the middle of the road metal before it. [6]

Black metal; arguably the most perceived to be evil of all the extreme metal sub-genres, and a genre that’s been the subject of A LOT of controversy over the years…while its origins may lie in England thanks to VENOM and the album that practically named the entire movement; “Black Metal”, the bulk of it can be found in (You guessed it) Scandinavia etc. It’s here that the genre picked up its notoriety with cases of band mates murdering each other as well as convictions for hate crime, bands using ACTUAL images of suicide victims on album covers (See MAYHEM’s “Dawn Of The Black Hearts”) and if that wasn’t enough, several churches have legitimately been burned down!

But, let’s not dwell on those crazy Scandinavian bastards for now, as black metal reaches further afield than that, and one of the genre’s most prominent bands can actually be found in Greece. Yes, today we’re going to be focusing on ROTTING CHRIST. Formed in the late 80’s, they were one of the first black metal bands to form out of the Mediterranean region and have been an iconic and influential force for many an underground band ever since, and 2019 sees them release their brand new studio album “The Heretics”, Their first in three years. Let’s all skip church together and find out what the Greek’s have got in store on album number thirteen…no I said SKIP church not set fire to….never mind…

The album opens up with “In The Name Of God” and its spoken word intro is incredibly damning and profound, pointing out the overall hypocrisy of mankind. While many of us today denounce the idea of any religion, the very concept seems archaic while we create our own miracles; yet we still are able to pick and choose our own deities as they suit us…war and death in the name of God not out of true belief, but out of convenience. Musically the track has a rigid, militant tone which suits the aura of the track completely and it’s an intense start. The album then to its credit just keeps getting better and better…”Vetry Zlye” manages to balance pummeling percussion and Sakis scorching metal vocals with some beautifully melodic guitar, along with the sweet, cleaner vocal notes of Russian singer Irena Zybina. The two complement each other brilliantly and it’s an infectious piece of metal! Speaking of infectious, “Heaven And Hell And Fire”, despite it’s obvious metal aesthetics carries a great guitar hook layered within another up-tempo melodic metal offering, this is all very good stuff!

This is further backed up by album highlights “Fire God And Fear” and “The Sons Of Hell”…the former starts with another spoken word piece amidst the quaint chirping of birds, like it’s the introduction to one of the levels on “Dungeon Keeper”, but swiftly descends into a wall of blackened metal riffage, and THAT solo? It’s superbly executed and slicker than a bowl of extra virgin olive oil! The latter embraces a more traditional heavy metal style, evident in the wailing guitar notes and more methodical approach instrumentally, before “The Raven” utilises more soaring guitar harmonies while Sakis recites the works of Edgar Allan Poe.

There are some minor hiccups mid-album…such as “I Believe”, which combines a spoken-word Greek monologue with an unrelenting wall of noise as the frantic guitars are played on loop in the background, and it gives you a little bit of a headache before it fades out, while “Hallowed Be Thy Name”, although commanding and ominous in tone, does suffer from a case of repetition. Although to be fair, these flaws are minor in the grand scheme of things. “The Heretics” has showcased Rotting Christ’s ability to incorporate melody and an accessibility into their otherwise crushing sound, something which was lacking on “Rituals”, resulting in a wonderfully smooth listen. Putting aside the gimmicked elements of early Catholicism with the ritualistic or ceremonial chanting emitting from the backing vocal samples, this is a really strong blackened metal concept album and if you’re unsure of making the jump from traditional metal into something more dramatic and intense, then this is actually a brilliant segue record. It’s as easy-listening as extreme metal can get but it loses none of its credibility. Forget rotting, Christ sounds fresher than ever. [8]

DEWAR PR is a PR company based out of Ontario, Canada, run by CEO Curtis Dewar. Specialising in all that is hard and heavy within the music industry, Dewar champions all of the underground genres such as sludge, stoner rock and other sub-divisions of heavy metal, allowing them the platform and opportunity to reach out to new set of ears worldwide. You may already be familiar with a couple of their clients through my recent 'My Wreckord Collection feature', but if you really want a taste of what Dewar has to offer, then look no further.

“Dewar PR Presents” is a brand new, FREE TO DOWNLOAD sampler compilation album, consisting of seventeen tracks by seventeen different artists, showcasing the variety of metal you can find within their catalogue of bands. Whether you like the groove-heavy hypnotic drones of sludge lords FALSE GODS….the traditional sound of old school thrashers TOMMY CONCRETE, the classic, sensual darkness of Gothic rockers HER DESPAIR, or even the sweet vocal harmonies of DUST PROPHET, there is sure to be something for you over the course of this record. Curtis himself says;

“I’m pleased to release the latest in our series of compilations! This is the fifth year of Dewar PR being in operation and I’m excited to have the chance to work with great new bands.  Download the compilation and support (with money) any of the bands that you enjoy! If you’d like more information on promoting your next release with Dewar PR, please email me at dewarpr@gmail.com!”

Follow the link below to download the sampler…did I mention it’s fucking FREE?!?! Get on it!

Track List:
1] FALSE GODS – “They Who Speak To The Lost”
2] OWL MAKER – “Witches”
3] TOMMY CONCRETE –“Leith Punk Flat”
4] HER DESPAIR – “Blaspheme With Me”
5] GORM – “Beyond Black Rainbow”
6] CHAOS SYNOPSIS – “Sixteen Scourges”
7] ALICEISSLEEPING – “Scary Mary”
8] RITUAL EARTH – “Solar Ecstasy”
9] DEATH ON FIRE – “Witch Hunter (Remix)”
10] VESSEL – “The Dreaming”
11] BLESSED BLACK – “Stormbringer”
12] STUMP TAIL DOLLY – “Regret”
13] ALLFATHER – “By Sword By Famine By Plague”
14] DUST PROPHET – “The Big Lie”
15] ARCHARUS – “Erebor”
16] RIFT – “Lift To Ash”
17] DESERT KINGDOM – “Unleash All Hell”

Jonathan Davis and Fred Durst once very lovingly tried to tell us that, it’s all in the family…and though while more of a roast battle than anything else, ideologically, the sentiment rings true more often than not. Families and close relatives especially will always have a natural bond that’s hard to find elsewhere, and this can be incredibly beneficial for musicians and performers. You can look back through history and find some of the most successful recording artists of all time have been blood relatives; THE BEE GEES, THE BEACH BOYS, THE JACKSON 5…and even up to modern times the importance and value of that bond has been hammered home by the sad passing of Tom Searle of ARCHITECTS…and this brings us to today’s band. Let me introduce you to BLACKLIST 9.

Originally formed in Southern California back in 2013, they are the brainchild of founding members (Also father and son duo) Lonnie and Kyle Silva. With Lonnie on drums and Kyle taking up guitars, they initially started as all bands do, jamming in the garage, making some noise…but this soon turned into an aspiration and an actual project as opposed to a hobby. After a demo or two with some local musicians and some extensive local gigging, they caught the bug; this is what they wanted to do and so, taking this seriously, they had a shuffle in the ranks. Brought in were new vocalist Graham Fletcher and bassist Ray Burke, and so began the journey of writing and recording their proper debut. Scheduled for release this coming March via Eclipse Records, let’s find out why Blacklist 9 are “Mentally Ill, Legally Sane”…

The album opens up with “Azzip” and although no more than an intro piece, it’s absolutely fucking demented…some quiet knocking leading into this, intensifying tinny guitar and a wall of sheer, noise, clutter and distortion. Some of the squeals emanating from these speakers right now leads me to believe I’m PRETTY sure someone is being recorded raping a pig here, but it’s hard to tell really…utterly psychotic. First track proper then, “Stand In Line” actually gives some musicianship which after that opening is frankly fucking welcome! With the deep, bass-heavy riffs and coarse production it takes on an up-tempo, southern groove metal / sludge crossover style…though the solo is clean…a bit like finding a pound coin that’s been dropped in dog shit. I mean it’s a pound coin, you might need it for a trolley like, but you aren’t picking it up. On a serious note, if anything you could liken this to a drunken VIKING SKULL demo with added heaviness.

“Kali Smile” has a drawn-out riff-driven intro that eventually incorporates some up-beat, rhythmic percussion and again it’s all about the groove with these guitar hooks…in ways it can be likened to the likes of MUDVAYNE in places instrumentally, though aesthetically the nu-metal is more of a nuance. The vocals are still brash and aggressive, and are about as appealing as cauliflower ear for the most part, though it has to be said the death growls salvage things in the long run. “Liars” takes a more classic-thrash inspired approach with its pacey delivery and there are hints of SLAYER and PANTERA trickling through here as influences, the solo guitar work is again, a highlight. Early demo track “Madness” makes a reappearance, nothing truly stand out as it slowly chugs itself along, before we finish up on “Legally Sane”; returning to that southern groove metal style, the album’s title track, inspired the trial of mass-shooter James Holmes who murdered 12 people in that dreadful Colorado theatre shooting.

Coming back to my initial point about family bonds and chemistry, it’s easy to see that, musically things ARE working out here; for a debut first and foremost and secondly for a sludge metal inspired musical style, they’re on the right path, Lonnie and Kyle clearly have a vision…the riffs and percussion are solid and the overall guitar work is fine, there’s definitely a market for this, but it’s vocally where these fall down. If it weren’t for the death metal growls Graham would miss the mark completely here, as when he’s not growling he’s grating…there’s no REAL tone to his voice and it all just becomes angry venting after a while. Honestly, they’d be mentally ill to not consider replacing him and really work on that aspect of the bands overall presentation, for it’s those vocals that bring some decent metal down. Blacklist 9 by name but, not as many listens for me to blacklist them…for now at least. [2]

Back in 1992, back when I was still only 3 years old and barely singing ‘Mary Had A Little Lamb’, death metal was arguably at its mainstream peak, sacrificing those very lambs I sang of, ready to branch out like THAT rape scene from ‘Evil Dead’, into a myriad of other malevolent  genres…violating all whose ears fell upon it. During that time, today’s band underwent their formation and for a long time they went by the name of OCCULT, following in the footsteps of Norway’s earliest death metal bands…but in 2006, they transformed into the band we know them as today; LEGION OF THE DAMNED.

Not to be confused with former WWF/WWE tag team Legion Of Doom (Though noticeably not as intimidating) The current line-up consists of long-time members Maurice Swinkels and Erik Fleuren on vocals and guitars respectively, accompanied by bassist Harold Gielen and drummer Twan Van Geel, but while their name may have changed, their core principles remain, as they unleashed their 13th studio album; “Slaves Of The Shadow Realm” very early in January 2019. Let’s see if a cold, dark winter night is the perfect environment for such an album to exist…

The album opens up with “The Widow’s Breed” and it pretty much sets the tone and feel of the album from the word go…with the intense blend of frantic, technical death; the viciously spat blackened vocals of Maurice and a classic, thrash metal inspired core sound…it really is in your face and unrelenting. Whatever the hell they are, if this is how they breed no wonder they’re widows! I DARE you to try and fuck to this song; you won’t have a dick left! “Charnel Confession” then with its opening cracklings gives a feeling of an old-school approach…fast-paced and up-tempo, yet with a strong groove, not to mention the sporadic, wild guitar solo, it channels with it the likes of fellow countrymen IMMORTAL and MAYHEM.

The thrash-elements shine through again on tracks like “Palace Of Sin” and you can see where earlier artists like SLAYER and EXODUS have rubbed off on them stylistically, with both the riff-work and percussion going full throttle from the get go. It’s not all hard and heavy however, not quite anyway, as “Shadow Realm Of The Demonic Mind” initially gets underway with a gentle, melancholic piano-led intro, really breaking up the bombardment at the halfway point, though it sadly doesn’t last very long. The rest of the album is predominantly by-numbers classic blackened death metal…though interestingly, they’ve thrown in two bonus tracks (“Priest Hunt” and “Azazel’s Crown”) BEFORE the end of the album, which is different. The latter housing more of those screeching guitar wails, and another solo, but not really diversifying all that much…

Truth be told, Legion Of The Damned they are, and have been for a while now, but I’ll be damned if this isn’t just another standard thrash/death crossover album. I’m not knocking them musically as a unit, they deliver technically very well, they sound crisp, tight and the production here is sound for the genre, but it’s really nothing you haven’t already heard before. Never mind the shadow realm; they’re more like slaves to their own heritage. [5]
​

Recently I premiered a new feature for the GTGC reviews page, something which I dubbed "My Wreckord Collection". It's a simple premise, artists and band members from all walks of life take a break from plugging and promoting their own material, and instead get to nerd out over their own personal tastes and private record collections. On our first entry we went in hard and heavy, literally, as Mike Churry, drummer from Philadelphia death metal outfit BASILYSK briefly talked us through five of his favourite obscure death metal albums. In this installment, we'll be hearing from Markus Wikander, vocalist / guitarist of Swedish hardcore thrashers LEACH, who released their newest album "Hymns For The Hollow" in 2018...lets percolate through his personal picks and see what inspires him.

ANTHRAX - "Spreading The Disease"

"So after that I got really into Anthrax. A few years later they reunited as the "classic" lineup (2005?). They were coming to Sweden Rock Festival and I was really stoked about it. They were having this signing booth so I was standing in line with a friend. He had this patched up jeans vest with his favorite bands and he was a power metal guy which I thought was kind of dorky. For some reason he left the line going somewhere, but he asked me to hold his vest 'cause it was hot, so I did. Finally finished the line and I was standing there with them asking if they could sign my copy of "Spreading The Disease", which they did. But they also pointed at the vest and a patch with Swedish power metal band HAMMERFALL and asked me "Do you like that band?". I was so fucking nervous and didn't know what to say so I said "Yeah, sure". They looked at each other and started giggling, probably thinking "Who is this lame fuck". I wanted to disappear, I was so embarrassed! Never meet your heroes..."

Favorite song: "A.I.R"

MEGADETH - "Killing Is My Business..."

​"'Peace Sells...' is without doubt my favorite 'deth album but I gotta' pick this one because it's so goddam ugly. Everything is bad about this cover. Found the original Combat release so I had to have it!"
 
Favorite song: "Killing Is My Business"

NUCLEAR ASSAULT - "Good Times, Bad Times"

"If the "Killing.." cover is bad in a bad way, this one is bad in a good way! Don't know what I like about it really but there's just some punk ingredient that I just like. With their faces badly pasted on there with the exploding Hindenburg. Works well with the title!" 

Favorite song: "Hang The Pope" (Live)

MASTODON - "Crack The Skye"

​"If somebody put a gun to my head and I had to pick ONE album that I had to listen to for the rest of my life, I'd pick this one. There's so much nuances that you discover for each listen and I think I can never grow tired of this one." 

Favorite song: "The Czar"

​Courtesy of the lovely folk over at DEWAR PR, we’re kicking off 2019 with a brand new blog feature. In something I’d like to call “My Wreckord Collection”, here we’ll be delving deep into the personal record collections of bands and artists from all walks of life; getting a glimpse into their own individual tastes…what inspires them to write, record and play music, and possibly discovering some hidden gems along the way. Today in this opening segment, we’ll be turning our attention to a ‘twisted’ death metal band by the name of BASILYSK…and more specifically their drummer Mike Churry. Hailing from Philadelphia, the 4-piece, who have described themselves as a serpentine assault on the senses; have their brand new album “EmergencE” scheduled for release on February 22nd…let’s see what’s potentially inspired Mike to make noise, as he runs us through some of his favourites in his own words…

​CONVULSE - "World Without God"

"One of Finland's first and finest death metal bands. If you are truly one who savors rare, underground death metal, then this is the album to feed your soulless ears. With four tracks off their 1990 demo included, and two bonus live tracks, I highly recommend World Without God for your morning drive to work!"

VIOGRESSION - "Expound and Exhort"

"From the underground Wisconsin death metal scene, behold Viogression!  This record boasts of John Tardy-style vocals, viciously evil sounding riffs and pummeling drums. Sure to send you right to the chiropractor for severe whiplash. The ever changing guitar revolutions never leave a dull moment for the listener!"

DEPRAVITY - "Silence of the Centuries"

"Well known in the Scandinavian metal regions, Finnish band Depravity stands strong in their rank.  Spooky, ghoulish, heavy, and memorizing most of all.  Let the beautifully composed solos coat the melancholic chord progressions, while you gaze at this masterpiece artwork done by one of my favorite artists, Turkka Rantanen.  Sure to give you chills.  This album will not let you down."

DEMILICH - "Nespithe"

"Technical, brutal, otherworldly, artistic overall.  No words seem to fully describe this dark Finnish diamond.  I could only explain how I felt upon listening for the first time in the Fall of 2007.  Brutal death metal from Mars?  Low tuned alien brilliance?  Whatever it was, it took me for one hell of a ride.  Artwork by none other than Turkka Rantanen, this album is dressed to impress in many ways.  Guitarist and stomach-churning vocalist Antti Boman (who also designed their logo) practically raised the bar for extreme death metal.  I got to see these gods crush Millcreek Tavern last May, and  I'm proud to say that I shared many conversations with their drummer Mikko and Antti himself.  27 years later, and the value of this album is the same, if not maybe even more. To me, it's priceless."

DEFORM - "Nefarious Impulses" (Unholy Domain Records Cassette Release)

"Formed under the name Desiccation in Fall 2007. Tim Ninerell (R.I.P.) and myself were practically the only death metal heads in our small town of Hainesport, New Jersey.  We were inspired to write good ol' fashioned death metal in the vein of bands like Suffocation, Morgue, Accidental Suicide, Convulse, and of course, DEATH!  We recorded a 2 song demo in 2007 titled Flesh Eating Disease.  A year later we wrote Morbidity, a five song demo.  During a four year hiatus, we finally got around to record Nefarious Impulses, and employed artist Derek Waugh draw up this sick design.  If I could turn back time to ask for a click track and punch in a faster tempo from the engineer, then this release probably would have taken us even further. But even at this slower tempo, the music is flawless in my eyes. Nefarious Impulses WILL punch a hole through whatever you play it on. 

The next planned Deform album "What Lives In Shadows" would have been 10 times better then the last, with art work by Turkka Rantenan. Sadly, this album never made it to recording, as Tim disbanded Deform in 2015 and passed away later that year.  I've been practicing guitar for a while now, so I am going "What Lives In Shadows" happen some day."

Well well well...what can I say? 2018 has been and gone; some of it was awesome, some of it was interesting, some of it was amusing and a lot of it was spectacularly shit...however, one thing that's consistent is the sheer volume of music and art created around the world. 2018 saw me cover my usual rock and metal albums...there wasn't a lot of goth...but I dabbled in some pop, in some rap, in some hip-hop...that's not including that which I checked out for the team over at All About The Rock...ultimately 2018 has kept me on my toes musically and I'm sure that my Top 20's, no matter the category, can show you that. 

From Eurovision bangers courtesy of Saara Aalto...to heavy metal swan songs a la Machine Head. From returning Welsh rap rock renegades The Kennedy Soundtrack...to returning Finnish goth godfathers Musta Paraati. From crossover WWE Superstar Elias...to young crossover Stranger Things superstars forming Calpurnia...you name it there's been something for everyone in 2018 and I like to think I've covered a fair unbiased amount of it. After over 200 albums and EP's, the above gallery showcases the best of the best of 2018 and I hope you agree with my overall picks. Below you'll find the link to the GTGC Facebook page, where you can find my lists in their entirety (Including the bonus WORST 20 OF 2018) and my official GTGC 2018 Spotify Playlist, and I hope you enjoy listening to it as much as I enjoyed compiling it. Here's to 2019 and all of the new music coming our way...some of it will get the GTGC treatment, and you know you're looking forward to that. Peace out bitches...WUBBA LUBBA DUB DUB!!!!!!!!!!!!

While it’s been a short while now since we’ve properly heard from Anaheim alt. rockers NEW YEARS DAY, we’ve been treated to a couple of projects from front-woman Ash Costello. Last year saw her branch out with horror-pop band THE HAXANS and their incredibly fun album “Party Monsters”…but this year, although returning under the NYD moniker, we find Ash indulging herself on what is essentially a covers EP. Occasionally you’ll find interviews and articles in magazines, revolving around the artists and songs that shaped other artists…but Ash wanted to go one better and actually record her own versions of the songs she deemed so inspirational. The result; the “Diary Of A Creep” EP…a fitting tribute, or should their new year’s resolution be no more covers? Let’s find out…

We open up the EP with the sole original track “Disgust Me” and it’s somewhat appropriate, like, you say it out loud, and the EP does its fucking best to do just that. With its hard-hitting percussion and deep, chugging riffs, coupled with Ash’s melodic vocals over a hook-laden chorus, its trademark NYD…balancing subtle gothic tendencies with a heavy, nu-metal aesthetic, getting the EP off to a decent albeit standard start. We follow that with the first of five covers…and we’re spanning a plethora of era’s and styles here. Naturally it’s fair as influence can come from all walks of life, but here, together, in this style…something just doesn’t quite gel. We begin with a cover of NEW ORDER’s “Bizarre Love Triangle” and gone are the quaint synths…gone are the soft vocals of Bernard Summer…instead we find crunching, disjointed riffs and Ash’s powerful vocal chords, backed with key changes, repetitive classic guitar licks and gang vocals. The whole thing comes across as copy and paste, looping itself as it ticks along and sadly lacks any of the originals charm.

We shift gears completely next up, as we dabble in a spot of metal via PANTERA classic “Fucking Hostile” and it kind of does what it says on the tin; the raw aggression carries through with Ash’s angrier vocals and they know how to deliver a riff, but it’s hard to see how this would go down with traditional metal fans…they’ll either respect you (Albeit resentfully) for covering it in the first place, or form a Wall Of Death that even Donald Trump would be in awe of, but aim TOWARDS the stage and trample you into the floor for doing so…they’re on thin ice here. Next up…and, oh god…we have “Crawling”…yes…THAT crawling, by LINKIN PARK. Now, let’s be honest, who hasn’t been inspired in some way by Linkin Park in recent generations? But, to attempt to cover such an iconic song is BRAVE! It totally lacks the original feel of the song, there’s no angst or passion, and sadly it comes across as really quite flat, which is a complete shame. Ash’s melodic vocals work here but as soon as the track shifts into gear, it just doesn’t compare; the pain is missing and the result is a hollow song.

The last couple of tracks include GARBAGE hit “Only Happy When It Rains”, which while originally an iconic 90’s indie rock hit, here, even aided by LZZY HALE, lacks any of the song’s original feel…not even the duel vocals here can match up to Shirley Manson and if anything just makes you cringe, before there is some level of redemption on closing track “Don’t Speak”. The NO DOUBT classic works well here as Ash really does justice to Gwen Stefani’s vocal style and with the metal touch musically it gives the track a new lease of life. Overall while it’s all well and good to want to pay respects to your hero’s and inspirations, it sometimes works better in theory rather than practice. Ash and NYD have a style and a sound that suits them, and some of the tracks covered here really don’t benefit from that sound at all. If anything I guess, it gives you a chance to go through the originals, and maybe discover some classics you may have missed, depending on your age and tastes…other than that, it’s an EP of interesting but sadly disappointing covers. [4]

Over the years many an artist, in rock ‘n’ roll especially, have used shock tactics or elaborate theatrics to help get themselves noticed. It’s all part of the image; the horror and excess that (Music aside) helps separate rock and metal from other genres. Many have succeeded throughout history…ALICE COOPER arguably helped start it all with his stage production going WAY back, you have the likes of ROB ZOMBIE bridging media formats by branching out into some intensely brutal horror movies…though today however we’re focusing not so much on artistic theatre, but, more of a macabre pantomime…yes we’re going to be looking at LORDI. Now instantly recognisable, their whole gimmick is based around the demonic monster costumes designed by front man Mr Lordi (Real name Tomi Petteri Putaansuu) but, despite being around for some time now, it wasn’t until that fateful and unforgettable night where they WON the Eurovision Song Contest for Finland back in 2006.

As unreal as that sounds, “Hard Rock Hallelujah” catapulted them into a mainstream audience, and their tongue-in-cheek style or horror metal has won them over a legion of fans, and they now have an impressive back catalogue of albums. Earlier this year they released their ninth; the wonderfully titled “Sexorcism”, supposedly their most controversial release to date…somebody better call Father Merrin, I think Jesus has done WAY more than fuck this lot…

We begin with the title track and it does open up like a cut from a horror movie score; really dramatic sounding and in preparation for a jump scare or intense fight between good and evil. The simple but ominous piano soon gives way though to some decent riffs and a surging hard-rock aesthetic and musically this is fine; it’s got a decent melodic hook for  a chorus too which, given, Mr Lordi’s honestly awful gravelled vocals, is quite impressive….it’s been produced really well up in Finnvox. This is far from a regular exorcism however (Is there even such a thing?) as he sings of FINGERING the demon out of her…steady on guys this isn’t the 19th century, you can’t be palming shit like this off like hysteria…did she even consent? This gimmick is backed up later by the interlude “Scg9: The Documented Phenomenon”, which essentially parodies THAT Exorcist scene with only slightly re-arranged verbiage. I really don’t know if this is a tribute or a parody…

The ridiculousness doesn’t stop there however as thematically following on from the title track we’re gifted with “The Beast Is Yet To Cum”...a nice play on words there Sir but if anything you’re promoting the fact that your own fingering skills are sub-par at best. Y’all motherfuckers need STEEL PANTHER and that’s one thing I thought I’d never say! In terms of musical highlights, it’s actually quite hard to separate any of the 13 tracks offered this time around. “Naked In My Cellar” has some more catchy synth elements and initially opens up like an early NIGHTWISH number before it delves into this rumbling, bass-heavy riff, and it’s about as clean as Mr Lordi’s vocals can probably get? It’s got a great pop chorus really…”Polterchrist” is another amusingly named track which starts off with some chilling female choir-esque vocals and more piano, before descending into a chugging, classic-metal type affair.

We eventually close out with “Sodomesticated Animal” which aside from its admittedly good name and a decent solo doesn’t inspire a great deal, while “Haunting Season” rounds things up with a generic symphonic metal effort. The trouble with this album is, everything seems to last forever, all of the songs, despite their comedic quirks, sadly drag a little and overstay their welcome to a degree. Less Lordi, more of a thick load quite frankly…a good release for Lordi perhaps like but, not something you want in your ears…the power of Christ compels you to NOT listen to this album. [4]