So this review was not on my schedule…it wasn’t submitted to me as a request, nor was it generally even on my radar. Quite frankly I had absolutely no idea who the fuck these were, however, a good friend of mine Rob De Boer lovingly forwarded them to me. I’ve known Rob a few years now through mutual friends and a mutual love of HIM, and all things Jackass related, and the last time I saw him properly was when we saw CKY at Manchester. Fun night…Matt Deis got lost in the venue he was playing, and I think there was a stabbing…good gig though.
I digress…Rob has recently started up his own podcast called SETTING THE TONE, where he takes a moment to go over his thoughts and opinions of various new singles from up and coming artists, and generally discuss relevant topics in the music industry; openly sharing his views and is worthy of your support. He was sent this EP to check out and do a piece on, and wanted to know what I thought of them myself. Now I don’t know Rob’s final thoughts on the artist, we’re a little different in our approach…but those of you who are regular readers can probably guess where this is going…
The band in question, are FIGHT THE TORNADO and I immediately hope their influences include Matt Hardy 1.0. Consisting of members Jonny Young on vocals and multi-instrumentation, and Lindzi North on vocals and…sanity maintenance? Both of whom were former members of the symphonic metal band CURSE OF DAWN (Part of me wonders if they were fired…harsh you say? Patience you must have my young Padawan) though we find them gearing up for the release of their debut EP “Maelstrom Of Thought” on June 26th. With that tornado in mind, are they going to blow us away or simply just suck? Let’s find out…
The EP begins with “Mercurial Inventions” and truth be told, the intro is actually promising…it’s got a light, bubbly electronic aura and sounds like it’s about to delve into some nostalgic synth pop…but without the slightest hint of transition we’re thrust into a barrage of progressive nu metal riffage and it’s like, where the actual fuck did this come from? You know that meme with the dog sat in a room on fire, stating that this is fine? This is the soundtrack to that image. It’s so off-kilter and jarring you can’t help but wonder if this really was intentional, and that’s before we even get to the vocals. Fleeting between snarling and angelic, though neither of them hit the mark; it’s like, I would have PERSONALLY paid for the use of autotune for you to save myself the grief of hearing this.
We follow this with EP highlight “Comfort Zone” and yes I actually said highlight there…we start off in a similar fashion combining pulsing electronica with metallic riffs but here it’s all blended noticeably better, as in, it’s actually blended. Vocally then, I want to point out that the snarls in ways remind me of NEW PROJECT and the aggressive aspects of this work, but when we get to the cleaner, melodic vocals it’s an actual dumpster fire. The chorus manages to hold a note, an albeit incredibly flat and lifeless one, but that is an achievement, trust me. The same issues arise during “Sensory Deprivation” and the title is more than fitting as I would sooner be deprived of my own sense of hearing than deal with this. How bad can this unconventionally tuned singing be I hear you ask? Well…here are just SOME ways to categorise this; a mute yodeller with a sore throat, a wok full of spoons falling down the up-escalator like some painfully cacophonous slinky, the shared harmony of two stray cats shagging in the back lane. Not convinced? How about Wes Scantlin covering NIRVANA?
Sadly my friends, we aren’t done…the title track is an instrumental that to its credit, delivers conceptually, I’ll give it that. It goes from progressive rock and metal riffs, including a decent solo with more subtle synth work…before we introduce PAN PIPES out of nowhere, only to be followed up with alternating death metal blast beats and ambient reggaeton. I honestly can’t say ‘what the ever loving fuck’, with the adequate level of conviction here…seriously that was like a non-invasive lobotomy. If that wasn’t enough, “Atlas” kicks in with some goddamn BTEC “Tubular Bells” and I’m like, nope. I’m done. I’m out. Fight The Tornado? I would sooner gamble my genitals in a Dyson V10 Cyclone…and I can guarantee my cries of pain would hold better notes. [2]
I digress…Rob has recently started up his own podcast called SETTING THE TONE, where he takes a moment to go over his thoughts and opinions of various new singles from up and coming artists, and generally discuss relevant topics in the music industry; openly sharing his views and is worthy of your support. He was sent this EP to check out and do a piece on, and wanted to know what I thought of them myself. Now I don’t know Rob’s final thoughts on the artist, we’re a little different in our approach…but those of you who are regular readers can probably guess where this is going…
The band in question, are FIGHT THE TORNADO and I immediately hope their influences include Matt Hardy 1.0. Consisting of members Jonny Young on vocals and multi-instrumentation, and Lindzi North on vocals and…sanity maintenance? Both of whom were former members of the symphonic metal band CURSE OF DAWN (Part of me wonders if they were fired…harsh you say? Patience you must have my young Padawan) though we find them gearing up for the release of their debut EP “Maelstrom Of Thought” on June 26th. With that tornado in mind, are they going to blow us away or simply just suck? Let’s find out…
The EP begins with “Mercurial Inventions” and truth be told, the intro is actually promising…it’s got a light, bubbly electronic aura and sounds like it’s about to delve into some nostalgic synth pop…but without the slightest hint of transition we’re thrust into a barrage of progressive nu metal riffage and it’s like, where the actual fuck did this come from? You know that meme with the dog sat in a room on fire, stating that this is fine? This is the soundtrack to that image. It’s so off-kilter and jarring you can’t help but wonder if this really was intentional, and that’s before we even get to the vocals. Fleeting between snarling and angelic, though neither of them hit the mark; it’s like, I would have PERSONALLY paid for the use of autotune for you to save myself the grief of hearing this.
We follow this with EP highlight “Comfort Zone” and yes I actually said highlight there…we start off in a similar fashion combining pulsing electronica with metallic riffs but here it’s all blended noticeably better, as in, it’s actually blended. Vocally then, I want to point out that the snarls in ways remind me of NEW PROJECT and the aggressive aspects of this work, but when we get to the cleaner, melodic vocals it’s an actual dumpster fire. The chorus manages to hold a note, an albeit incredibly flat and lifeless one, but that is an achievement, trust me. The same issues arise during “Sensory Deprivation” and the title is more than fitting as I would sooner be deprived of my own sense of hearing than deal with this. How bad can this unconventionally tuned singing be I hear you ask? Well…here are just SOME ways to categorise this; a mute yodeller with a sore throat, a wok full of spoons falling down the up-escalator like some painfully cacophonous slinky, the shared harmony of two stray cats shagging in the back lane. Not convinced? How about Wes Scantlin covering NIRVANA?
Sadly my friends, we aren’t done…the title track is an instrumental that to its credit, delivers conceptually, I’ll give it that. It goes from progressive rock and metal riffs, including a decent solo with more subtle synth work…before we introduce PAN PIPES out of nowhere, only to be followed up with alternating death metal blast beats and ambient reggaeton. I honestly can’t say ‘what the ever loving fuck’, with the adequate level of conviction here…seriously that was like a non-invasive lobotomy. If that wasn’t enough, “Atlas” kicks in with some goddamn BTEC “Tubular Bells” and I’m like, nope. I’m done. I’m out. Fight The Tornado? I would sooner gamble my genitals in a Dyson V10 Cyclone…and I can guarantee my cries of pain would hold better notes. [2]
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