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Dita Von Teese - "Dita Von Teese"

26/5/2018

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You’re probably very well aware by now that I’ll tackle damn near anything on this blog…be it the recent return of the Eurovision Song Contest; with its multifaceted line-up, ranging everywhere between brilliantly bonkers to down-right dreadful, to even tackling things such as video-game crossover’s between IRON MAIDEN and ANGRY BIRDS…essentially I enjoy something a bit different now and again; my point being? Well today we’re looking at something incredibly bloody different as today we’ll be listening to (not looking at) DITA VON TEESE. That’s right; Dita (Real name Heather Renée Sweet) is mainly famous for tastefully wearing very little as she’s probably the world’s most recognizable burlesque dancer / model, but 2018 sees her swapping the corset’s for the recording studio.

She’s no stranger to music per se, for not only was she briefly married to none other than MARILYN MANSON of all people, appearing in a couple of his music videos in the early 2000’s, as well as for other artists, but she also appeared on the aforementioned Eurovision back in 2009 assisting with Germany’s performance on stage. Now we find her releasing her own self-titled record under the banner of “Dita Von Teese”…written by French songwriter and multi-instrumentalist Sébastien Tellier, let’s see what she’s learnt along the way…

We open up with “Sparkling Rain” and what we’re given is very much akin to the ambient sounds of a dreamscape; the soft synths and gentle electronic pop allowing for a very mellow, fluid listen…coupled with Dita’s very delicate hushed vocals, the song sparkles in its own right as it’s so light and bubbly, perfectly matching the references to Champagne thematically. It’s an interesting start. We follow up with lead single “Rendez-Vous” and the overall tone hasn’t really changed whatsoever, although we’re given a slightly subtle tinny, almost Caribbean inspired feeling to proceedings, tying in with the exotic theme lyrically. Slightly sultry, she sings of erotic romance and forbidden fruit, although some of lyrics are delivered awkwardly truth be told.

“La Vie Est Un Jeu” reveals to us the albums underlying inspirations as it’s one of a few tracks that incorporates French…again, the overall tone of the song is the same but it’s got more of a shoe-gaze feel to proceedings; it’s incredibly relaxed with its whistling and soft piano, but the fake laugh is a bit cringe-worthy and sadly, the bulk of this album is on the verge of being very copy and paste. While “Fevers And Candies” does at least have a little more go to it in terms of momentum via the chorus’ simple hook, a lot of the album is teetering dangerously on lifeless. “Dangerous Guy” has some decent rhythm going for it courtesy of some funk-driven percussion, and “Porcelain” does include Tellier himself as a vocalist which adds extra character, but the album is so stripped back for the most part it fails to really motivate repeat listens. Fair play to Dita for wanting to try something new, but this is quite acquired taste…so acquired in fact that it only charted in France and Belgium…and even then only reaching 119 and 140 respectively…Dita Von Teese? Dita Von PLEASE…stick to writhing around half naked in giant Martini glasses you’re much, much better at that. [3]

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    Gavin J Griffiths, a.k.a GavTheGothicChav, lover of new music and supporter of bands. Inspired by a mixture of horror and comedy, and fueled by a blend of alcohol and sarcasm...if you're a singer / in a band and would like a review written up, please do get in touch via the email address at the top of the page and I'll get back to you ASAP. Much love x

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