I'm approaching 40. I'm going grey, I ache, I self-medicate with wine, memes and procrastinatory doom scrolling, and I look at the world with a level of doubt that even the Apostle Thomas couldn't comprehend...and his buddy Jesus came back from the dead. Allegedly. I'm on the verge of a mid-life crisis...but...what does that entail? I could invest in a flashy car or, motorbike...but I don't drive so that's pointless. Or have the money. I could take up an absurd hobby like, trying my hand at stand-up comedy or, joining a wrestling school...but that involves social interaction so that's a no-no. No, I think I'll do something that needs doing...and that's kicking myself up the arse to write again.
Granted, just the other day I DID put a drill through my hand unintentionally, which makes even writing, among other menial day-to-day tasks troublesome, but I'll persevere, and with that randomly macabre anecdote, we come to today's album in question; "Mid Death Crisis" by WEDNESDAY 13. Sure, it was released in April of 2025, but, as I'm seeing them at the Corn Exchange in Newport this very weekend, I thought it'd be a great place to restart. With that being said, let's get our grave on, and check out "Mid Death Crisis"...
We open with the brief intro "There's No Such Thing As Monsters"...which is just over a minute of perversely pulsing, brooding, creepy electronica, while Wednesday repeats the title in a husky, deep yet hushed drawl. It's foreboding, like you're in a creature feature, or sci-fi horror, and that one-character gives the game away without actually giving you anything, and you know you're in for an ordeal. It's simple, but it's effective in setting a tone very early on.
First track proper then "Decease And Desist" erupts through your speakers like a battle cry for the undead. It's been no secret that Wednesday has been heavily inspired by all thing's horror throughout his career, and this is a perfect example. An ode to "Return Of The Living Dead", the bleak comedy horror is honoured with a flurry of riffs, references and thunderous rock 'n' roll vitriol, capturing the unrelenting chaos of a zombie swarm.
"When The Devil Commands" takes things down a notch in terms of ferocity but is no less intense. The dark, chugging bass provides a truly imposing sense of discomfort within the context of the track here, but it's more of a cliche in terms of Satanic lyricism. The brief guitar solo is flash, but this is honestly a pretty repetitive track at its core. I'm not knocking anyone's beliefs here, but this is edgelord shit. The kind of track that would get the blame if some kid shot up another school Stateside. Who am I kidding, if? I meant when. WHEN another kid shoots up another school Stateside.
Speaking of being unalive, "Rotting Away" is about a definitive a break-up song you could possibly ask for. I mean it could be a breakup song, I'm assuming, it could be...might just be an enemy, equally dramatic. Who has time for enemies these days? I don't. Having enemies takes effort...but then again so do partners...meh. Either way Wednesday really can't wait for some motherfucker to die here, that's for certain, and it's punky, it's gritty and it's personal. I'm going to write Wednesday a birthday card just to be safe.
The marital issues continue with "In Misery" and my first personal highlight of the album. Leaning very much into the notion of a toxic relationship, the hard rock aesthetics and more melodic nature of the track hark back to the earlier days of "Skeletons" or "Fang Bang", while retaining that gravelly, abrasive nature of Wednesday's delivery, and there is some wonderfully sharp guitar work here too. If you aren't already familiar with Wednesday 13, then imagine the darker side of SOUTH OF SALEM for an example. I know that might sound daft, but you ever know.
If there is one thing I love, it's a play on words, and "Xanaxtasy" is one such word. Xanax being a prescription drug, used for anxiety, panic attacks and being a sedative at heart, is a very common drug in the US. Case in point, they dosed up Preston Lacy on the set of JACKASS 2.5 just to film a bit where he was dressed as King Kong, stood on a portable toilet, swatting toy aeroplanes. Preston doesn't want to do it guys...just give him some fucking Xanax. Job done. I'm making light of an issue here, and the title leans into addiction and the issues with Big Pharma, and the over-reliance of prescription drugs, as well as mental health as a whole. The track is nonchalant but the message is deep.
"I Hurt You" returns to the territory of toxic relationships and it's another play on words..."There's no one that hurt's you, the way that I hurt you. You know my touch it's so cruel, the way that I hurt you!"...replace the word hurt with love. It's an honest, damning look into controlling, coercive and manipulative behaviour, but it's played with such an understated sorrow in its tone and instrumentation; the gaslighting is real here and it's really quite the powerful track.
We close proceedings with "Sick And Violent" and it's a high-octane, rock 'n' roll number full of piss and vinegar designed to make the listener want more, and it works. It's got vocal hooks, a clap-along quality, another slick guitar solo and a catchy simplicity that just spews fun, frantic energy. This album is rounded off nicely.
With all of that being said, what can we take away from "Mid Death Crisis"? This far into his career, Wednesday 13 hasn't really deviated from his own devious path. Whether it's the early days of FRANKENSTEIN DRAG QUEENS FROM THE PLANET 13, (We could go back further), or whether it was rehashing songs for the horror-punk supergroup MURDERDOLLS, up to present day, Wednesday has always stuck to his guns. Now, I don't care if they are like the crotch gun from "From Dusk Til' Dawn", or whether it's Dean Winchester shooting rounds of rock salt to ward off demons in "Supernatural", Wednesday has his niche, he has his style which he has more than cornered the market on, and he continues to do it well. He may not age, like the undead, but he's nearly 50...and he continues to give his all, as passionate as ever with not only the love of his craft, but the passion of his horror inspired subject matter, and for that you can't not commend the man. Mid death crisis? Send more paramedics...we would like to keep Wednesday 13 around for a while longer thank you. [7]
Granted, just the other day I DID put a drill through my hand unintentionally, which makes even writing, among other menial day-to-day tasks troublesome, but I'll persevere, and with that randomly macabre anecdote, we come to today's album in question; "Mid Death Crisis" by WEDNESDAY 13. Sure, it was released in April of 2025, but, as I'm seeing them at the Corn Exchange in Newport this very weekend, I thought it'd be a great place to restart. With that being said, let's get our grave on, and check out "Mid Death Crisis"...
We open with the brief intro "There's No Such Thing As Monsters"...which is just over a minute of perversely pulsing, brooding, creepy electronica, while Wednesday repeats the title in a husky, deep yet hushed drawl. It's foreboding, like you're in a creature feature, or sci-fi horror, and that one-character gives the game away without actually giving you anything, and you know you're in for an ordeal. It's simple, but it's effective in setting a tone very early on.
First track proper then "Decease And Desist" erupts through your speakers like a battle cry for the undead. It's been no secret that Wednesday has been heavily inspired by all thing's horror throughout his career, and this is a perfect example. An ode to "Return Of The Living Dead", the bleak comedy horror is honoured with a flurry of riffs, references and thunderous rock 'n' roll vitriol, capturing the unrelenting chaos of a zombie swarm.
"When The Devil Commands" takes things down a notch in terms of ferocity but is no less intense. The dark, chugging bass provides a truly imposing sense of discomfort within the context of the track here, but it's more of a cliche in terms of Satanic lyricism. The brief guitar solo is flash, but this is honestly a pretty repetitive track at its core. I'm not knocking anyone's beliefs here, but this is edgelord shit. The kind of track that would get the blame if some kid shot up another school Stateside. Who am I kidding, if? I meant when. WHEN another kid shoots up another school Stateside.
Speaking of being unalive, "Rotting Away" is about a definitive a break-up song you could possibly ask for. I mean it could be a breakup song, I'm assuming, it could be...might just be an enemy, equally dramatic. Who has time for enemies these days? I don't. Having enemies takes effort...but then again so do partners...meh. Either way Wednesday really can't wait for some motherfucker to die here, that's for certain, and it's punky, it's gritty and it's personal. I'm going to write Wednesday a birthday card just to be safe.
The marital issues continue with "In Misery" and my first personal highlight of the album. Leaning very much into the notion of a toxic relationship, the hard rock aesthetics and more melodic nature of the track hark back to the earlier days of "Skeletons" or "Fang Bang", while retaining that gravelly, abrasive nature of Wednesday's delivery, and there is some wonderfully sharp guitar work here too. If you aren't already familiar with Wednesday 13, then imagine the darker side of SOUTH OF SALEM for an example. I know that might sound daft, but you ever know.
If there is one thing I love, it's a play on words, and "Xanaxtasy" is one such word. Xanax being a prescription drug, used for anxiety, panic attacks and being a sedative at heart, is a very common drug in the US. Case in point, they dosed up Preston Lacy on the set of JACKASS 2.5 just to film a bit where he was dressed as King Kong, stood on a portable toilet, swatting toy aeroplanes. Preston doesn't want to do it guys...just give him some fucking Xanax. Job done. I'm making light of an issue here, and the title leans into addiction and the issues with Big Pharma, and the over-reliance of prescription drugs, as well as mental health as a whole. The track is nonchalant but the message is deep.
"I Hurt You" returns to the territory of toxic relationships and it's another play on words..."There's no one that hurt's you, the way that I hurt you. You know my touch it's so cruel, the way that I hurt you!"...replace the word hurt with love. It's an honest, damning look into controlling, coercive and manipulative behaviour, but it's played with such an understated sorrow in its tone and instrumentation; the gaslighting is real here and it's really quite the powerful track.
We close proceedings with "Sick And Violent" and it's a high-octane, rock 'n' roll number full of piss and vinegar designed to make the listener want more, and it works. It's got vocal hooks, a clap-along quality, another slick guitar solo and a catchy simplicity that just spews fun, frantic energy. This album is rounded off nicely.
With all of that being said, what can we take away from "Mid Death Crisis"? This far into his career, Wednesday 13 hasn't really deviated from his own devious path. Whether it's the early days of FRANKENSTEIN DRAG QUEENS FROM THE PLANET 13, (We could go back further), or whether it was rehashing songs for the horror-punk supergroup MURDERDOLLS, up to present day, Wednesday has always stuck to his guns. Now, I don't care if they are like the crotch gun from "From Dusk Til' Dawn", or whether it's Dean Winchester shooting rounds of rock salt to ward off demons in "Supernatural", Wednesday has his niche, he has his style which he has more than cornered the market on, and he continues to do it well. He may not age, like the undead, but he's nearly 50...and he continues to give his all, as passionate as ever with not only the love of his craft, but the passion of his horror inspired subject matter, and for that you can't not commend the man. Mid death crisis? Send more paramedics...we would like to keep Wednesday 13 around for a while longer thank you. [7]
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