Comparison is the thief of joy...this is a saying that rings true in not only all art forms, but all walks of life in general, and the more we assume and expect of one another, sadly it’s an ever-unavoidable trait we all become more guilty of as time goes by. Let's take professional wrestling as but ONE example; the tribalism online between WWE and AEW fans can be comical...but it’s all pro-wrestling...just fucking enjoy it! There is something for everyone!
Be it Darby Allin’s Jackass-inspired stunt bouts, Joe Hendry’s joyful sing-along charm, Toni Storm’s unashamedly, sexually dramatic art-noir cinematic persona, or Goth-Mami metalcore Queen Rhea Ripley! You can enjoy what you enjoy, without having to compare it to its “competition”! You’re allowed to enjoy BOTH! Not that that’s going to matter, while influencer Uncle Dave Meltzer is shitting out biased star ratings, like a game of Mario Party with chronic diarrhoea. A misguided, mainstream malcontent if you will. I digress...
Here however...with regards to comparison, we fall into a slightly more nuanced category...it’s more of an in-joke truth be told, and it might not even be the intention of the artist, but it’s a game now amongst me and my peers. We are talking about the band FLOVER, and the inevitable game of HIM-Bingo. It’s a simple game of spot the copyright grey area, or at the very least, pass the plagiarism as opposed to the parcel.
Some of you may remember the last time I covered Flover, ironically during VV’s initial UK solo run in 2023, promoting “Neon Noir”, they had released “Love’s Poetry & Dead Melodies”. It was the usual cross-referencing task of likening the song to a HIM connection, even down to a song title, riff or chord sequence, becoming a fun in-car game on tour. Now, in 2025, the Euro-national ensemble who have never played a gig together, return with “Love Archives, Vol.1” ...and the game has already begun before we even hear a single note of music.
The very title is a spin on HIM’s “Love Metal Archives Vol. 1” DVD compilation from 2005, where it acted as a sort of visual accompaniment/alternative to “And Love Said No”. It housed all of the band's music videos spanning their first four albums with some behind the scenes stuff, live and deep cuts etc... blatant isn’t the word here. The cover art? While it APPEARS they’ve used some generic Roman/Greek statue bust for the image, it could be argued it’s an attempted tribute to “Venus Doom”, with the image being likened to the statue of Venus Di Milo, but the hair doesn’t match. Yes, I image searched Greek and Roman statues to compare the hair cut on a piece of marble. It’s probably AI. Techniti noimosyni...aye technically nonsense.
All that aside, we begin with opening track “Red Vinyl” and it’s an interesting one lyrically. Vocalist Fabio sings of this woman of alluring darkness, living in the shadows, seemingly presenting herself in the aforementioned material, with eyes like stained-glass windows. The idea of seduction and temptation as a test of faith, with the idea being the quest for love, not lust, as vinyl, better known as PVC accounts for some wonderfully slutty outfits. Love Metal? More like Love Honey! Am I right? Or she could literally be a red LP that he wants to stick his pin in to make sweet music. We don’t do subtlety here. Instrumentally it’s a generally slow methodical piece, with some trademark Linde guitar vibrato here and there, over chugging riffs, plodding percussion and sprinkles of synth. It’s fine. Fun fact; Love Honey is offering 20% student discounts with online vouchers! What are you studying in university? Biology? Sure. Moving on.
Follow up track “Love Becomes Her” has this very sparkly, jovial piano intro, but the bulk of the track is a little bit messy. The guitars are all lost in the mix here, lacking any sense of clarity or definition, while Fabio’s semi-hushed vocals channel “Screamworks...” era Ville Valo, even down to certain inflections, inhalations and overall delivery. It works for tribute and cover bands; the intention IS to copy the singer...you’re very openly saying look, we’re doing this band, come and enjoy this bands catalogue...here it’s like, Ville would be more inclined to put a restraining order on you before anything else. Bit like my friend Rob in Nottingham...but that’s a different story.
All the while then “Flower In My Hand” is for the most part, a decent, up-tempo little track with melody and some catchy vocal hooks, even if some of the synths sound like a tweaked “Vampire Heart” intro...that is until from out of the blue, we have this really needless Basso Profondo vocal fill, ripping off “Venus Doom” for no other reason than they could, adding nothing of any value to the track. The flower in question must be Atropa Belladonna, because this has killed me off. This is so instrumentally HIM on multiple fronts...ask them their favourite HIM song...they’ll just say “Yes”.
Proving my point even further... “Lovve”...like you’re going to slip a double V in there without anyone noticing? With the soft piano intro and the actual chorus including the words “The sacrament of love” …you’re not even trying now lads. Speaking of... “Butterfly Song”. After twenty years it’s like something Ville would write on a set-list to save time. It’s an MP3 or WAV file name. It’s also boring. “Lovve” DOES have an Ellin Spring remix which, as an instrumental piece of throwback 80’s synth-wave, is genuinely far better than anything that was officially put on the “SWRMXS” release, but that’s about the highest praise you’re going to get here.
Overall...as an audio experience, it’s not a TERRIBLE record by any means. It houses an obvious feeling of familiarity as the HIM tropes do take you back to happier, simpler times...but those HIM influences and tropes that made FLOVER initially stand out have now become the darkly romantic equivalent of STEEL PANTHER. It was fun at first...but now it’s like, guys...we get it. The joke wore thin for Steel Panther but at least they ARE a parody band...Flover aren’t even a band really...they are a project aimed at a certain circle of fans...but it’s less a “Circle Of Fear”, more a circle-jerk over a ritualistic Heartagram. “Love Archives Vol.1” doesn’t feel like a hidden treasure...it’s more like finding your Dad’s dusty home-made porn stash in the attic, and wishing you’d found Captain Howdy... honestly, what possesses them to keep this up? [5] - Words: Gavin Griffiths
Be it Darby Allin’s Jackass-inspired stunt bouts, Joe Hendry’s joyful sing-along charm, Toni Storm’s unashamedly, sexually dramatic art-noir cinematic persona, or Goth-Mami metalcore Queen Rhea Ripley! You can enjoy what you enjoy, without having to compare it to its “competition”! You’re allowed to enjoy BOTH! Not that that’s going to matter, while influencer Uncle Dave Meltzer is shitting out biased star ratings, like a game of Mario Party with chronic diarrhoea. A misguided, mainstream malcontent if you will. I digress...
Here however...with regards to comparison, we fall into a slightly more nuanced category...it’s more of an in-joke truth be told, and it might not even be the intention of the artist, but it’s a game now amongst me and my peers. We are talking about the band FLOVER, and the inevitable game of HIM-Bingo. It’s a simple game of spot the copyright grey area, or at the very least, pass the plagiarism as opposed to the parcel.
Some of you may remember the last time I covered Flover, ironically during VV’s initial UK solo run in 2023, promoting “Neon Noir”, they had released “Love’s Poetry & Dead Melodies”. It was the usual cross-referencing task of likening the song to a HIM connection, even down to a song title, riff or chord sequence, becoming a fun in-car game on tour. Now, in 2025, the Euro-national ensemble who have never played a gig together, return with “Love Archives, Vol.1” ...and the game has already begun before we even hear a single note of music.
The very title is a spin on HIM’s “Love Metal Archives Vol. 1” DVD compilation from 2005, where it acted as a sort of visual accompaniment/alternative to “And Love Said No”. It housed all of the band's music videos spanning their first four albums with some behind the scenes stuff, live and deep cuts etc... blatant isn’t the word here. The cover art? While it APPEARS they’ve used some generic Roman/Greek statue bust for the image, it could be argued it’s an attempted tribute to “Venus Doom”, with the image being likened to the statue of Venus Di Milo, but the hair doesn’t match. Yes, I image searched Greek and Roman statues to compare the hair cut on a piece of marble. It’s probably AI. Techniti noimosyni...aye technically nonsense.
All that aside, we begin with opening track “Red Vinyl” and it’s an interesting one lyrically. Vocalist Fabio sings of this woman of alluring darkness, living in the shadows, seemingly presenting herself in the aforementioned material, with eyes like stained-glass windows. The idea of seduction and temptation as a test of faith, with the idea being the quest for love, not lust, as vinyl, better known as PVC accounts for some wonderfully slutty outfits. Love Metal? More like Love Honey! Am I right? Or she could literally be a red LP that he wants to stick his pin in to make sweet music. We don’t do subtlety here. Instrumentally it’s a generally slow methodical piece, with some trademark Linde guitar vibrato here and there, over chugging riffs, plodding percussion and sprinkles of synth. It’s fine. Fun fact; Love Honey is offering 20% student discounts with online vouchers! What are you studying in university? Biology? Sure. Moving on.
Follow up track “Love Becomes Her” has this very sparkly, jovial piano intro, but the bulk of the track is a little bit messy. The guitars are all lost in the mix here, lacking any sense of clarity or definition, while Fabio’s semi-hushed vocals channel “Screamworks...” era Ville Valo, even down to certain inflections, inhalations and overall delivery. It works for tribute and cover bands; the intention IS to copy the singer...you’re very openly saying look, we’re doing this band, come and enjoy this bands catalogue...here it’s like, Ville would be more inclined to put a restraining order on you before anything else. Bit like my friend Rob in Nottingham...but that’s a different story.
All the while then “Flower In My Hand” is for the most part, a decent, up-tempo little track with melody and some catchy vocal hooks, even if some of the synths sound like a tweaked “Vampire Heart” intro...that is until from out of the blue, we have this really needless Basso Profondo vocal fill, ripping off “Venus Doom” for no other reason than they could, adding nothing of any value to the track. The flower in question must be Atropa Belladonna, because this has killed me off. This is so instrumentally HIM on multiple fronts...ask them their favourite HIM song...they’ll just say “Yes”.
Proving my point even further... “Lovve”...like you’re going to slip a double V in there without anyone noticing? With the soft piano intro and the actual chorus including the words “The sacrament of love” …you’re not even trying now lads. Speaking of... “Butterfly Song”. After twenty years it’s like something Ville would write on a set-list to save time. It’s an MP3 or WAV file name. It’s also boring. “Lovve” DOES have an Ellin Spring remix which, as an instrumental piece of throwback 80’s synth-wave, is genuinely far better than anything that was officially put on the “SWRMXS” release, but that’s about the highest praise you’re going to get here.
Overall...as an audio experience, it’s not a TERRIBLE record by any means. It houses an obvious feeling of familiarity as the HIM tropes do take you back to happier, simpler times...but those HIM influences and tropes that made FLOVER initially stand out have now become the darkly romantic equivalent of STEEL PANTHER. It was fun at first...but now it’s like, guys...we get it. The joke wore thin for Steel Panther but at least they ARE a parody band...Flover aren’t even a band really...they are a project aimed at a certain circle of fans...but it’s less a “Circle Of Fear”, more a circle-jerk over a ritualistic Heartagram. “Love Archives Vol.1” doesn’t feel like a hidden treasure...it’s more like finding your Dad’s dusty home-made porn stash in the attic, and wishing you’d found Captain Howdy... honestly, what possesses them to keep this up? [5] - Words: Gavin Griffiths
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