The Brooklyn Hardcore legends known as BIOHAZARD are back with "Divided We Fall", their first studio album in over a decade, out October 17th via BLKIIBLK. 

Originally formed in 1987, and having had various personnel changes over the years, Biohazard has reunited the original line-up, creating an album that delivers a blistering statement of unity in chaos. Bobby Hambel (guitars) had this to say about the album:

"We are really excited to finally have the classic BIOHAZARD line-up back together in the studio. This album has been a long time coming, and the record is straight from our hearts - we can’t wait for everybody to hear it, and to head out and play these new songs live. See you out there!”

Now, in all transparency, I wasn't the biggest fan of them after their 1994 album, "State Of The World Address". Not for any other reason than my musical palette shrank as I dove into Death Metal; an egregious error on my part as diversity is the slice of life, and one that has since been rectified. With that in mind, don't ever limit yourself to one genre, it's extremely one dimensional, especially when you consider how much music is out there for us to experience. 

Anyway, as I sit here listening to "Divided We Fall", I can't help but notice that these guys, despite pushing 60 years of age, are just as vicious in their music as they were back in the day. I can't help but think that this is partially due to having the classic line-up back together, but also that there's a lot to be angry about in this day and age. We all are truly divided, both sides thinking that they're superior to the other, and both of them being completely wrong in that assumption. So yeah, "Divided We Fall" is exactly what's gonna happen if this country can't get its shit together!

Evan Seinfeld is still a badass, and having him back, he re-joined in 2022, has been a shot in the arm of this band. The way he writes and performs is absolutely essential to this band's sound, though that could be said about any of these guys, but for me, it centres on what Evan brings to the table. But enough ass kissing, let's talk about the standout tracks!

"Divided We Fall" opens up with “Fuck The System”, a statement that I completely agree with. Our current system in the US is irreparably broken, and we need songs like this to remind us that this shit is NOT ok. The Hardcore riffs are heavy, and in them I hear a bit of EARTH CRISIS, who are legends of the Syracuse Straight Edge Hardcore scene. While I do hear that band in there, this track is undeniably Biohazard, from the vocals to the overall tone and performance. 

Following that is “Forsaken”, another absolute banger of a track. This one also has all the hallmarks of classic era Biohazard, it's heavy, angry, and exactly what I want to hear from this genre. There's a sick lead break before what I'd consider to be the break down, which goes hard as fuck! Killer tune from start to finish!

“Tear Down The Walls” is pretty far down in the track list, but is no less a banger than any of the previous songs on this album. There's plenty of crushing Hardcore riffs, gang vocals, and positive messages hidden within the lyrics. Biohazard doesn't want you to take anything laying down, and they deliver that message as only they can. 

“Death Of Me” is another track that I find myself going back to over and over again. There's the obligatory sounds that one would expect from the band, riffs, heaviness, and the attitude that is a huge part of the genre itself. I believe that many of you will grasp onto this track like I have. 

Other standout tracks include “War Inside Me”, “S.I.T.F.O.A”, and “Warriors”.

Is Biohazard breaking the mold? No, but no one wants them to either. Fans expect a certain sound and direction from these old-school Hardcore legends, and they deliver it with all of the power and edge that they've exhibited throughout their career. So dig in now because the record is out and ready for your ears! Words: Tom Hanno.

ORBIT CULTURE is a band that's on the fast track to mass appeal, especially over the last 2 years or so. They hail from Sweden, a land rich in Metal history, and they carry that torch with reverence to the past, but while also standing firmly in the present. 

”This record represents change, a new beginning...”, says Orbit Culture guitarist, vocalist and songwriter, Niklas Karlsson. “It brings up a lot of good and bad emotions but it’s a big change for the better. It feels like a rebirth...”

Karlsson was inspired by a steady diet of METALLICA, GOJIRA and STATIC-X, all of which can be heard within the music on the band's newest, and possibly best album to date, "Death Above Life", released on October 3rd, 2025. I also hear influences from bands like IN FLAMES. 

“Inferna” kicks off the festivities in grand fashion! This track almost reaches the 7 minute mark, which can be tough for some listeners, but it never feels bloated or boring, making for an enjoyable listening experience. 

“Bloodhound” starts off with a riff that is as heavy as Thor's mighty hammer. Which is a fact that continues throughout the verse sections, but when he growls “You fucked it up, you fucking asshole”, that's when you really feel the power of this track. Then the band matches it with some groove heavy riffs, some nifty electronic elements, and killer vocal performances. This is one heavy track, serving as a perfect example of what Orbit Culture is all about. 

For a bit of back story, Orbit Culture had done an arena tour with SLIPKNOT in early 2024, which helped to open the band’s eyes to bigger possibilities. “If we never did the Slipknot shows, for instance...” says Niklas. “I would never have written a song like ‘Bloodhound’ on the new album. Just watching them every night, there was an intensity and furious rage that we got to see closely, first-hand, it pushed us...”.

“The Tales Of War” begins with a bit of orchestration, setting the mood for what is to follow perfectly. When the riff kicks in it also kicks your ASS, utilizing intricacy and groove in order to get your asses into the pit as soon as you hear it. This is one of those tracks that I feel is indicative of all the cool elements that this band has at their disposal.

“Inside The Waves” pulls in an influence that hit me hard when I realized what I was hearing, as I'm a huge fan of this band and their now deceased original singer … the one, the only, Wayne Static and Static-X. This influence is subtle, but it is most definitely there nonetheless. You wouldn't know it by listening to it, but … [Editor: Then...how did you know???]

 “For me, that was going into a LINKIN PARK phase...” Karlsson freely admits. “I wanted to write something that was easy and singalong friendly. Of course, it’s not written for the masses, because if I tried to do that, I would fail miserably!”

“Hydra” crushes from its intro, and will steam hammer its way into a lot of playlists, mine included. This one has the heaviest vibe thus far, and not because it's fast or complicated, but instead because of the undeniable power of the main riff. “Hydra” is in the Top 3 as far as my picks for the best of the best in Death Above Life.

Other standouts tracks include “Nerve” and “Death Above Life”.

I listened to this album for about the thousandth time while at work today, and didn't stop banging my head the whole time, all while customers looked at me like I was weird for that and for mouthing the lyrics like I was in the band.

In other words, I recommend that you go check out this album immediately! It's full of everything that the modern metal head loves, and I feel it will become a staple in your daily listening habits. Words: Tom Hanno.

Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big telly. Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electric tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental care. Choose fixed-interest mortgage payments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisurewear and matching bags. Choose a three piece suite on hire purchase in a range of fucking materials. Select DIY and asking yourself who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Select sitting on that couch, scowling at soul-destroying mind-numbing game shows, stuffing your mouth with fucking rubbish food. Select to waste away at the end of it all, pissing away your final few in some sad hovel, nothing but an embarrassment to the self-centred, fucked-up little brats you brought into the world to take your place. Select your future. Select life. But why in the world would I want to do something like that? I chose not to choose life. I chose something else. And the why? There is no why. Who needs why?

GLASGOW KISS, "Down In Flames", is like gettin' yer heid bashed in the head with a bottle and kissed again by the same cunt who bashed it in there. No genre box for this one, no thanks to HALESTORM, no thanks to NIGHTWISH, no thanks to all their bollocks. This is no longer nice symphonic trash, this is riffs crawl oot the amp like septic in the pipes, Charlotte's screamin' voice like an angel got booted oot heaven for smokin' tabs in the loos. Daniel playing like he's got his guitars set alight, Sveinung slicing strings like he's flaying a rat, John Erik's bass thudding like the neighbour banging on yer door at 5am bawlin' ye still owe him fags, Frode on drums banging harder than the polis when they eventually kick the door in. The whole of them frightens ye like a bad trip ye cannae get yerself oot of, only ye dinnae want tae.

It ain't classy stadium effluvia, it's dirty, dripping, teeth-rattlin' metal still smolderin', wee pools of loveliness concealed in the muck. A chorus'll carry ye along, aye, then deposit ye belly-first once again in the sewer with the verse. That's the dance: highs that scorch yer lungs, lows that shake the bone.

Charlotte’s the one that fucks wi’ ye most -- she’ll croon ye soft, then suddenly she’s bitin’ chunks oot yer ear. One minute ye’re floatin’ in daylight, next minute ye’re choking in midnight smoke. Ye cannae trust her, and that’s exactly why ye cannae turn her aff.

This album’s postcards fae the abyss: wee moments of joy scribbled on the back of broken glass. They recorded it across random holes, clubs, anywhere they could plug in, stitched it together wi’ spit, sweat, and maybe a wee bit o’ blood. And it works -- it’s jagged, it’s cracked, but it’s alive, pumpin’ like a vein wi’ fresh gear.

When it's done ye're shakin', tryin' tae work oot what the fuck occurred. And ye'll dae it again, 'cos ye haven't got a choice. That's addiction. That's GLASGOW KISS.

Rating: 9 oot o' 10 Glasgow Kisses. Spare the last yin for the walk hame.

Translations (Scottish → English):
Cunt = Person (derogatory/familiar depending on context)
Tabs = Cigarettes
Fags = Also cigarettes. Words: Matt Denny.

"Down In Flames" is released December 12th, via ECLIPSE RECORDS

My nephew, he comes to me the other day, he says "Uncle, you gotta hear this music, it's called heavy metal." So I says to him, "What's heavy about metal? We got plenty heavy metal in the warehouse - lead pipes, steel beams, that sorta thing." But he shows me this... this compact disc thing from these Canadian broads called KITTIE.

Now, I don't know nothing about no kittens. I got three cats at the social club, they're good for keeping the rats away. But these KITTIE girls? They make more noise than when Tony "The Hammer" accidentally drove the Cadillac through Mrs. Benedetto's storefront!

This "Spit XXV" - and what's with all these Roman numerals? Are we trying to impress the Pope here? It's got four songs on it. Four! Back in my day, you paid for an album, you got twelve, maybe fifteen tracks. These kids today, they're running some kinda racket, but I respect the hustle.

The first song, "Brackish XXV",  I looked up "brackish" in my dictionary (The one I use to press flowers for my wife's funeral arrangements business). It means salty water. You know what else is salty? My cousin Rocco after he lost fifty grand at the track. But these girls, they're screaming about brackish this and brackish that, and I gotta tell ya - it's growing on me like a fungus.

Then there's "Charlotte XXV",  Now, Charlotte, that was my first wife's sister's name. Beautiful woman, terrible cook. Could burn water. But this Charlotte song? It's got what my nephew calls "aggressive energy". Sounds like when my crew found out somebody was skimming from the poker games. Very passionate, very loud, very... how you say... therapeutic.

"Do You Think I'm A Whore XXV",  Hey, I'm a family man! I don't ask these kinda questions! But the music, it's like when Paulie gets really worked up about the garbage routes. All that intensity, all that... what's the word... angst. These girls got more fight in them than a bag full of wildcats.

And the title track, "Spit XXV", now this one, this one I understand. Spitting. That's universal language, you know? You spit when you're disgusted, you spit when you're angry, you spit when somebody disrespects the family. These Canadian girls, they get it.

The producer, this Garth Richardson fella - sounds like a nice Irish boy - he did the original back in 1999. That's the same year I opened my third pizzeria! Good year for business. He comes back 25 years later to work with these girls again. That's loyalty. That's respect. That's what we call "doing business the right way".

Now, I don't understand why they gotta scream so much. When I got something to say, I just lean in close and whisper. Much more effective, believe me. But these girls, they got what we call in the business "presence". When they walk in a room - or in this case, when their music plays - everybody knows they're there.

My verdict? Listen, I still don't know what the hell a "nu-metal" is (Sounds like some kinda modern art garbage to me), but these Kittie girls? They remind me of my late wife - small, sweet-looking, but don't cross them or they'll tear your throat out.
Four cannoli out of five. Would recommend to anyone who needs music for, intimidation purposes.

So, picture this: it’s half nine on a Thursday night, rain coming down in that relentless sideways way it does when the gods are taking the piss, and I’m parked outside some cul-de-sac in Leith, trying to wrestle a busted washing machine out the back of the van. My hands are numb, my back’s a write-off, and I’ve got Classic Rock Radio spitting adverts for stairlifts and Viagra when my phone buzzes.

It's my mate Gary — the guy who thinks that doom metal is a school subject that you can learn at school — and he tells me (I say tell, when Gary tells you something, it’s basically a demand), "Stick on the new FRAYLE, mate. It'll shift the weather in your head." So I did. And he was right.

The second "Heretics & Lullabies" starts, and the world crawls along. "Walking Wounded" starts — heavy crawling guitars like a motor warming up in a cemetery. Gwyn Strang's vocals don't sing; they haunt. They wriggle beneath your skin and nestle near your ribcage. The harmonies enfold one another like smoke, and the entire thing seems too delicate to be, but heavy enough to break asphalt.

"Summertime Sadness" — may well be a LANA DEL REY cover song, but they’ve turned it into some velvet-trimmed funeral dirge. It's the tune that makes you think of all the awful things you did when you were in love, but you want to hit replay so you can relive it anyway.

And then "Boo" hits. Like they opened the doors on the van and let the ghosts out to dance. The riffs sway, the vocals drift and break down, and there's this odd, sensual pull at it all — like listening to terror sing sweet nothings.

Later on the album, FRAYLE start to really experiment. "Demons" has this creeping sense of horror that makes you remember doom is not necessarily about velocity — it's about heft. And "Souvenirs Of Your Betrayal"? That's a tear-fest. That's heartbreak concretized, a glacial autopsy of trust with a distortion pedal thrumming in the distance. Gwyn's vocals here are blade and cut.

“Glass Blown Heart” does what it says on the tin — fragile but deadly sharp. The mix from Aaron Chaparian deserves real credit: there’s air in the sound, but no relief. Everything feels close, too close, like you’re locked in a room with the band as the amps hum and breathe around you.

By the final song, "Hymn For The Living", it's pure transcendence. Doom metal for the last mass on the last day. The smashing drums are surf on steel, and the vocals drift like incense up through stained glass. "Heretic" ties it all together — hook-prone, epic, and in-your-face. It's one standing exposed amongst the ashes and unbroken.

And "Only Just Once". The ballad. Sad, soft, heartbreaking. It's like the band are leading your hand out with the lights fading. You feel each straw of fatigue, each rasp, each drizzle of disillusion. When it is finished, there is this silence that has been well-won — like you've witnessed something you shouldn't have witnessed, but you're glad you've done so, anyway.

FRAYLE are not some doom band. They've built a cathedral out of distortion, misery, and desire — and managed to set it alight. "Heretics & Lullabies" is simultaneously old and new, sadistic and calming. It's their best, and come on. It's got to be a contender for album of the year.

A solid 9.5/10, bordering on a spiritual experience if you’ve ever worked night shifts, lost something precious, or just needed a reason to keep the van engine running while the world falls apart outside. In another life, I might be a roadie and not a man in a van, but now, halted on the edge of town, with FRAYLE drifting through the speakers and rain tapering off, I reckon that's alright. Words: Matt Denny.

Woke up this morning, made myself a cup of coffee, and began checking emails... where I found the upcoming TESTAMENT album, "Para Bellum". I immediately unzipped it, pushed play, and was blown away by the extreme power of the first track, "For The Love Of Pain", which may as well be Extreme Metal with Thrash leanings. If the rest of the album is this good, then Testament just put themselves at the tippy top of the Thrash Metal pile. 

The album title was taken from the Latin phrase “Si vis pacem, para bellum”, which translates to “If you want peace, prepare for war”. So if you're going to war, maybe use "Para Bellum" as your soundtrack. [Editor: Let's not encourage war perhaps, David Draiman got justifiably rinsed for personally signing missiles]. After about 2 weeks of steady listening, "Para Bellum" comes across as a heavy AOTY contender for me, and I feel that many others will have similar thoughts on it. 

Chuck sounds so fucking good, like, did this dude even age at all? Even at 63 years old, he attacks the mic like it owes him money, a lot of money, and in the process he sounds hungry for more. This album feels like it has the late 80s/early 90s vocals but with the intensity that Chuck displayed on albums like "Low" and "Demonic". There's times when he's bordering on Black Metal, especially on the first track, which we're gonna talk about soon. 

Eric Peterson and Alex Skolnick, do I even need to elaborate further? These two are icons of Thrash Metal guitar playing, and they have done nothing but get better over the years, culminating in this, their most brutal album in years! The riffs are brutal, the leads are memorable and melodic, and all the pieces fit together tightly. 

The bass playing of Steve DiGiorio is what it always is... out-fucking-standing!!! As a bassist myself, I always pay attention to what he's doing, because he's an immensely skilled bassist, no matter how many strings are on it. His playing with DEATH opened me up to the fact that Metal can be played on a fretless bass, a trick that many now apply, but no one does it like Steve does it. He's your favourite bassists favourite bassist, and nails it every fucking time. 

Then we have Chris Dovas on drums, and he's equally as incredible a player. With him onboard, this band is firing on all cylinders. Chris has touches of Louie Clemente, Dave Lombardo, and Gene Hoglan, yet attacks these songs with his own style and sound.

Now we're gonna jump right in and talk about the standout tracks on "Para Bellum"!!

"For The Love Of Pain” is my #1 pick in this record, and a perfect one to begin the record. It starts off with a quick drum piece that gives us a taste of what Chris can do, and what he does gives off a bit of a vibe that could be lightly compared to JUDAS PRIEST’s “Painkiller”. This all happens before the guitars kick in, but when they do, all bets are off because you're about to experience the magic that is Testament. This track is very heavy, the guitars are at Mach-speed in certain sections, and in others they're some of the best Thrash riffs that I've heard in recent times. However, for me personally, it's Chuck's vocals that are the highlight of this tune, and it's truly mind-blowing that he can still be this heavy in his early 60s.

One of my top 3 tracks is, ironically, the 3rd one on "Para Bellum". “Shadow People” is a lesson in Thrash mastery, with all of the hallmarks of old school Testament, and an excellent use of, dare I say it, melody, a word that can sometimes persuade hardcore headbangers to run in the opposite direction. But don't you do it, otherwise you'll be missing out on an incredibly good song. 

“Meant To Be” comes to the delight of many of us life-long Testament fans, as its inclusion is the first time they've done a “ballad” in many years. It's also a lesson in diversity, as it encompasses all of the different facets of their earlier ballads, think of their song “Return To Serenity” as a reference for that statement. The entire song is truly incredible to me, so make sure you don't skip it as you check out this record. 

“I love how the song takes off at the end and just doesn’t look back”, explains Peterson. “It's different, but it fits. It’s like a breath of fresh air". This also marks another novel moment for the band using true, orchestrated strings performed by world renowned cellist Dave Eggar.

“Witch Hunt” kicks off with a fast guitar part, one that borders on Death or even Extreme Metal, but once that ends, we get a riff that sounds like it would have fit right in on their album "Low", which, if you haven't heard it, is a must hear release. They had James Murphy on guitar for it, and if you know anything about Metal music, then you know his name. This song is another example of Testament reaching into their past for inspiration, yet fully committing to their present day sound, which produces wonderful results. 

“Room 117” is another one that's in my Top 3. This is mainly due to how infectious the riffs are, seriously, I challenge you to not move during this one … you won't be able to sit still though, so get ready for a sore neck. The verses and the chorus are insanely catchy, but it's the section that starts off with the lyrics, “I'm feeling lonely, I'm feeling helpless” that is my favourite part of this track. I loved that the guitars started the melody by employing a Thrashy riff that ended up following the vocal melody perfectly. It's heavy, catchy, and will stick in your head for hours after listening.

Chuck recently told "The Metal Voice"…

“I’m just happy and looking forward to the fans to listen to it, check it out because to me, this record sounds current...” he said. “It sounds modern. It doesn’t sound like a band that’s been 40 years around rehashing the same riffs, going through the same motion, taking the easy route out.”

He's right, because this record is straight fire from start to finish, no filler tracks, no weak anything. So get ready to snap your necks while headbanging violently to "Para Bellum", out via NUCLEAR BLAST RECORDS on October 10th, 2025.

Score: 8/10 - Words: Tom Hanno.

The new VICIOUS RUMOURS offering has struck me in the same way as that one night in Tunbridge Wells, where I Woke up in a stranger’s bed, wearing one sock and a scratch on my neck I couldn’t explain. I didn’t plan it. I don’t even think I enjoyed it. But it had me grinning like an idiot the whole drive home, bruises and all. But, I digress...

For forty-six years they’ve been out there, dragging their gear from stage to stage, sweating on the faithful, building the kind of stamina you don’t get from going easy. You hear it in the opening minutes and it felt as if I still had that cheeky finger in my prison wallet from THAT night.

Geoff Thorpe’s guitar playing makes every riff feels like it’s got one hand on your hip, steering you somewhere you’ve never been. The new guy, Chalice has a voice that, by the time you realize what’s happening, you’re in it, and you’re not leaving.

Denver Cooper, that bastard could out play Beelzebub’s cock. The solos burn hot, curl into the air, and hang there long enough to make you squirm. The rhythm section Larry Howe and Robin Utbult keep things as tight as gnats vajayjay.

“Bloodbath” doesn’t waste time. It’s a slap, a bite, and a laugh in your face all at once. “Dogs Of War” is pure midnight mischief — the kind of track you put on when you know you’re not going to sleep until the sun’s up. “Crack The Sky In Half” is the song that convinces you to stay the night, even though you know you’ll regret it.

“The Devil's Asylum” is the moment right before you cross the line. You can still turn around, but you won’t. Every note’s a shove in the small of your back, daring you to step over.

They recorded this whole thing in a few weeks, and it’s got that fresh, dangerous heat of something that hasn’t cooled down yet and has no safe words.

If you’ve ever found yourself in the middle of something filthy and thought, oh God, I shouldn’t be here, but stayed anyway, you’re going to like this album.

​This album is worthy of going full on D.V.D.A. [Editor: Matt, I had to Google that and have questions...]

Words: Matt Denny.

She looks like the person who slept at Comic Con and woke up in a bondage shop, and her new album "Encores" is even more bizarre. Imagine classical music shoved headfirst into a shredder of industrial depravity.

She's fast, yes, but it's speed with a dash of fear added. There is art in her fingers, she'd probably be able to restring a violin balancing scalpels, but the result is this blur wherein Paganini's spirit is chuckling or suing. Half the time I'm not even certain if I'm astonished or just sick.

Thirty songs. Thirty-six minutes. "Encores" is not an album in the traditional sense. It's a seizure. This is...for whatever reason...THE GREAT KAT...

"Paganini’s Caprice No. 9": She murders Paganini so fast, he skipped rolling in his grave and went straight to pole-dancing on it. "Sarasate’s Malaguena": A Spanish dance, now performed by someone who sounds like they’ve never even danced socially. Or had friends.

"Leather Britches Guitar": This sounds more like pleather pants rubbing up against one another as someone cries in a Hot Topic dressing room and less like leather britches. "Santa Lucia Guitar": What is more cliché for the tearful Italian serenade than a woman crying over the violin as if screaming for help from the back of a speeding car.

"Cumberland Gap Guitar": – A folk tune. And nothing captures the spirit of Appalachian mountain folk like a Juilliard grad in fishnets screaming at ghosts. "Pizzazz": The only thing this track pizzazzes is my migraine.

"Paganini’s Caprice No. 14":  At this point, Kat isn’t covering Paganini, she’s just speed-dating his corpse. "Pizzicato by Delibes": Delibes wrote this to sound light and cheerful. Kat plays it like she's auditioning for the slasher film with a busted lawnmower.

"Joplin's The Entertainer": Consider a stripper emerging to this, but she trips immediately, breaks her teeth, and keeps dancing. "Minute Waltz": Chopin wrote it to be performed in a minute. Kat finishes it before you can say, "This was a mistake."

"Shredssissimo":  Not a word, not a style, but a cry for help. "Nessun Dorma": Puccini's master aria of victory. Kat brings it down to the whine of a dying microwave.

"Dixie": She dares to play "Dixie." Considering this album already has enough sins against humanity. "The Flight of the Bumblebee": – Rimsky-Korsakov gave us buzzing chaos. Kat gives us a wasp sting inside your ear canal.

"Blue Danube Waltz": Strauss wanted waltzing elegance. Kat delivers the soundtrack to a drunk uncle vomiting into a wedding cake. "Caprice No. 24": Paganini’s most famous piece. Kat treats it like an ex-boyfriend she found on Tinder: fast, messy, and ultimately regrettable.

By the end, I wasn’t clapping “Encore". I was calling the emergency services.

Score: Paganini’s ghost just called. He wants his dignity back. Words: Matt Denny.

SUN DON'T SHINE has a new EP being dispatched by CORPSE PAINT RECORDS called "Coming Down", and my copy just showed up a few days ago. If you don't know who this band is, then may I suggest that you keep reading to find out? You'll stay? EXCEPTIONAL NEWS! Let's forget ahead then, shall we?

Sun Don't Shine started life as EYE AM, and is composed of Kenny Hickey, (Who you'll know from TYPE-O-NEGATIVE and SILVERTOMB), and he will be supplying vocals and guitars. Kirk Windstein of CROWBAR and the Stoner Metal supergroup known as DOWN will be doing the same. Then we have the one and only Johnny Kelly of Type-O-Negative, Silvertomb, PATRIARCHS IN BLACK, etc on Drums, and Todd Strange from Crowbar / Down laying down what James Hetfield once called “The four string mother fucker”.

These guys all have excellent resumés, right? With that fact firmly in mind, you are already aware that these musicians are going to deliver upon the promise that their careers imply. "Coming Down" has a total of four tracks, which is far too short in my opinion, but let's talk about each of them now.

1. “Coming Down” was the first and only track that I had heard before pre-ordering this black splatter on clear vinyl, limited to 100 copies. What I love about this one is that you can hear their other projects in it, which is solely due to the fact that these guys have a certain identity within their playing styles. There's a strong melody that flows throughout, and the vocal performances are outstanding as well. I was aware that Kenny could sing, but he exceeded my expectations with his performances across all four tracks. However, it's the guitar work that grabs me the most, with killer riffs and well written leads that are memorable and powerful. I also love the way the riffs and the vocals compliment each other. About 3 minutes in I picked up a PALLBEARER vibe, which is another band that I highly suggest to everyone with working ears. 

2. “Dreams Always Die With The Sun” is an excellent track, full of melody and Kenny's incredible vocal approach, which adds an almost ethereal and atmospheric quality to the proceedings. There's a riff that leads into the chorus that is reminiscent of Type-O-Negative, but on subsequent listens I have found that there's a massive "Odd Fellows Rest"-era Crowbar sound to it as well. I'm just noticing it, but Kirk is putting in a great backing vocal in the chorus. I didn't catch that it was him at first, because I expected to hear his raspy, Crowbar voice, but he's sounding phenomenal right here nonetheless; the way that they trade off singing the song title is the icing on an already delicious musical cake. 

3. “The Promise Song” kicks off with a bouncing and energetic riff that is super cool. When the vocals kick in, I started thinking that this song has a Chris Cornell and SOUNDGARDEN vibe. The track shifts and takes on a different feel, yet that Soundgarden sound persists and I'm totally here for it. The band is still able to keep their uniqueness, and I'm telling you what, this is one hell of a track. Again, the guitars and the lead breaks are perfectly executed and fit the overall tone very well.

4. “Cryptomnesia” is the last track, yet it is on par with the others in terms of song-writing, performances, and retaining their sound. Kenny and Kirk do some vocal back and forth that I found extremely enjoyable; I'm so impressed in how their voices compliment each other. The acoustic bit at the end reminded me of DAVID BOWIE, which was a huge, but really cool surprise. When the needle lifted at the end of this song, I knew that I'd be starting the record over several times. A fact that has carried on for several days at this point. 

If you hadn't noticed, I haven't brought up the drums and bass guitar much, but don't let that fool you into thinking that they aren't worth mentioning. Johnny is one of the most solid drummers out there, and he adds fills and flourishes where they're needed, putting out a performance that is exactly what these songs need. 

Lastly, we have the powerful and tasteful playing of Todd Strange. His bass tone is enormous yet not overpowering, and the notes that he chooses to play are interesting and support what birth the drums and the guitars are doing. There's so many spots where my bass player brain just melts and thinks about how fantastic what he's doing is. 

In closing, none of these tracks are carbon copies of their other bands, with this, and all of these tracks having their own identity, creating a new brand so to speak. It's crazy to me that I'm having a hard time picking a favourite track, but if forced to do so, I would go with “Dreams Always Die With The Sun”, there's just something extra special about that one that really stuck with me.

So go to YouTube, or wherever you listen to music and stream the tracks. Or, and even better yet, lay some money down on the vinyl if you can, then kick back and let these stellar songs work their way into your subconscious.

10 Out Of Mother Fucking 10! Words: Tom Hanno.

Well tickle my prostate and light the fuse, "Some Kind of Alchemy" isn’t just a reunion. Sure, if your idea of reunion involves chainsaws and parole violations; OTHERWISE didn't come back, they came back with a crowbar and a grin that'd make a mortician nervous..

I’m not here to hold your dainty little hands mouth breathers, or wax poetic about "Emotional journeys" and all that daytime TV horseshit. I’m not your therapist, and I certainly won’t explain the emotional depth of this music as if it’s some college dissertation.

This EP was fermented in a Nevada back alley with blood, sweat, bourbon, and a dash of righteous indignation. If you want subtlety? Go read a Hallmark card. This is six songs of gasoline and a match. And it's got me strutting around in circles, throwing confetti and middle fingers.

"Some Kind of Alchemy" starts off with an intro that gives you that greasy, bone-deep chill, like you just walked into a war-zone wearing a clown nose. It's raw, it's sharp, and it smells of napalm and cheap aftershave.

They've dragged original drummer Dave McMahan back into the fold like a long-lost cousin from the wrong side of the apocalypse, and it shows. There's this primal stomp to the whole EP, or just a biker gang doing tribal rituals behind a strip mall. You choose

The choruses are big enough to swallow a tour bus. Adrian Patrick belts every word like it might be his last breath before the gas ignites. And his brother Ryan’s guitar is the sound of desert ghosts whispering through the amps. If you’re still blinking,  congratulations, you’re probably not devoid of breath just yet.

Speaking of alchemy, this thing is a transmutation. It's pain into power. Trauma into triumph. A pair of Vegas-born brothers who’ve been chewed up by the industry and spit back out with gold records and gritted teeth, now digging their heels into the dirt and screaming, “Try again, motherfucker!”

If you want something slick, polished, or safe, go find a STEREOPHONICS CD and cry into your pumpkin latte. But if you're looking for blood-soaked riffs, battle-scarred vocals, and a band that’ll grind your bones into confetti, Some Kind of Alchemy is the sermon you’ve been waiting on.

This is family-hating, cop-baiting, drive-faster music and it sounds just like your ex lighting a cigarette off your burning house.

​Score: 8/10 Barbequed road kills not so fresh off of Route 95... Words: Matt Denny.

I opened the post half-asleep, looking for that USB bidet I swear I ordered off eBay. Instead, there’s this THING. Heavy, and it’s just sat there like a brick of haunted meat. I stared at it for a bit. Had a lager, warm obviously. Had another. Unwrapped it and stared at it blankly.

Put disc one on. "Slowly We Rot". 1989. I think I was 15 when I heard it first—skint, spotty, shoplifting Salt ’n’ Shake crisps with Lee, who later lost a toe. The whole thing sounded as if a diseased cow fell down a metal staircase. Tardy’s vocals are not words, they’re not even close. Just these retching, beautiful, wet belches of grief. It sounds like he’s contracted some prehistoric lung infection. I love it.

Disc two… "Cause Of Death". Suddenly, OBITUARY has got TEETH. James Murphy is playing guitar like it’s fucked his wife. "Chopped In Half" came on, and I started barking. Legit barked. Woke up the cat. Beer all over the floor. Don’t care. The floor needed it.

Disc three’s "The End Complete". Somewhere around track four, I forgot how the calendar works. The police knocked as they’d had complaints about the noise. I tell them to sit. They did. We hung out and chain-smoked through the whole disc in silence. It was, religious. Not in a Jesus way. More in a “We’ve seen hell and it’s groovy” way There’s a riff in "I’m In Pain" that reminded me of falling into an escalator.

Then… "World Demise". 1994. You can tell there’s paranoia baked in. Cleaner riffs, but not in a healthy way. The guitars are trying to behave, but the rot still seeps through. Industrial clangs here and there. Samples maybe. It could be the radiator. Or I was having a minor stroke. But it SOUNDS like how bins smell in August.

The box is nice. A slipcase with Jewel cases inside gives it a proper retro feel, except now everything’s sticky. Liner notes are somewhere under a pizza, and one of the postcards ended up in the loo. If you don’t own this, you’re either vegan, dead, or under house arrest.
 
Score: 8/10 Swollen Uteruses. [Editor: I'm guessing we're talking Endometriosis as opposed to pregnancy?]

Words: Matt Denny

By the gods of thunder and circuitry, I have found it. A land uncharted. A kingdom carved from distortion and fire. They call it "Re-Evolution". The natives go by the name DEVILSKIN, and I believe I’ve stumbled upon their magnum opus. This is not a recording; this is a living, breathing beast built from anguish, muscle, and melody.

My first encounter sounded primal and exacting, it surged through me like a blood oath. No preamble. No mercy. It felt as if I had stepped barefoot into a ritual I couldn’t comprehend. Jennie Skulander’s voice summoned gods I do not know by name. She doesn’t sing; she conjures. From delicate echoes to banshee wails, she maps the terrain of pain and triumph without a compass.

The terrain shifted and a sandstorm of riffs and percussion, scorching and relentless. I ducked for cover and found none. The album continues like an oasis, but even its waters shimmered with unrest. I began to understand, this album is built on contrast. Rage and grace live in twin towers here, each echoing the other’s scream.

Themes emerge of grief, addiction, phobia, decay. They’re not presented as artifacts to be examined. They’re alive, stitched into every note. DEVILSKIN aren’t storytellers. They are the storm and the wreckage, the ghost and the grave. Somehow, this doesn’t collapse under its own weight. It rises. "Re-Evolution" does not wallow in despair, it devours it, digests it, and builds something stronger from its bones.

The instrumentation is staggering. Paul Martin’s bass feels tectonic, shifting the very ground beneath this strange new world. Nic’s drumming isn’t just rhythm, it’s language. As for Nail, his guitar doesn’t merely shred. It paints. Cinematic, chaotic, sacred.

The production by Dave Rhodes is not a studio trick. It’s cartography. Every drum hit, every breath of feedback, every gasp in the silence, it all feels placed with ritualistic intent. The landscape is dense, yet navigable. Foreign, but familiar in that way danger sometimes is.

I came expecting metal. I found "Re-Evolution". A culture. A movement. An awakening.
If you dare tread here, tread carefully. There is no safe passage. Only fire, truth, and the most glorious noise I’ve ever survived.

Score: 9 / 10 – "Machete in Hand, Shirt Long Torn Off" - Words: Matt Denny

Every morning I drag my arse out of bed at 6:12 sharp, scrape toast crumbs off the passenger seat, and spend the next ten hours being screamed at by people who think their Vauxhall Astra’s bumper has feelings. So when someone says "BORN OF OSIRIS are back", I don’t exactly drop the polisher and start moshing in the garage.

Still, I gave "Through Shadows" a go during my lunch break, wedged between a Peugeot 308 with a caved-in door and an Audi that stinks of wet dog and despair. And I’ll say this—if you’ve ever sanded filler while listening to the soundtrack of a cosmic nervous breakdown, you’re already halfway there.

The opener "Seppuku" comes in swinging like a hammer to the ribs—tight, clinical, a bit like when the dent’s so bad you know your soul’s going to leave your body before the shift’s done. "Elevate" tries to get fancy with its clean vocals and time signatures, but it just reminded me of when a customer asks for a "quick fix" and then freaks when you quote them for three days’ work and a full respray.

"Through Shadows", the title track, is full of talk about darkness and light and finding yourself, which is rich coming from a band that sounds like a Terminator meltdown in a spiritual retreat. Still, fair play, it’s the kind of track that’d fit perfectly if I ever lose it and drive straight into the river with the torch still in my mouth.

I liked "Inverno" for the riffs, mostly because they drowned out Gary in the next bay going on about his third divorce. "A Mind Short Circuiting" is what I imagine my brain sounds like after eight Red Bulls and a flat battery on a Ford Mondeo.

​They’re at their best on "Torchbearer" and "Transcendence", where everything feels like it’s about to collapse under its own weight—but in a good way, like a write-off that somehow looks better than it did new. "Blackwater" closes the album out with enough melodrama to power a thousand TikToks, but I’ll admit: it stuck with me. Like the stink of fibreglass dust and frustration in my nostrils.

BORN OF OSIRIS aren’t here to make your day better. They’re here to soundtrack the slow, grinding entropy of modern life—and if that isn’t metalcore’s true purpose, I don’t know what is. Will I listen again? Probably. At least it makes more sense than the quote I just gave to a bloke wanting his bumper "perfect" for under a tenner.

Rating: 7.5 Crushed Panels Out Of 10. (Would weld again, preferably while ignoring Gary. - Words: Matt Denny.

Every now and again, a band will come along and even if not outright revolutionise the industry, will flip it upside its head. They make such an impact, that people have no choice than to sit up and take notice. It doesn’t matter what genre they fall under; that’s an afterthought. What matters is the connection they create with their audience, how they break the status quo, and how that band ascends from being A band, to being THE band. There are plenty of examples of such boundary pushers over the decades...even if we stick to the UK for the sake of this write-up. 

Whether it’s THE BEATLES or BLACK SABBATH, either super-popularising the idea of rock ‘n’ roll or the latter creating heavy metal out of it...whether it’s SEX PISTOLS or SPICE GIRLS, bringing unashamed, gritty, socio-political realism to punk or bringing “Girl Power” to the forefront of pop music...the UK, despite its small size, has always punched above its weight. This isn’t about chart success and streams, this is about artists who despite everything, became icons. These artists stood for something. Alright sure the Spice Girls were manufactured, but the reason they were was valid, and by fuck did it work. “Girl Power” wasn’t just a gimmick...if you enjoyed a “Brat Summer” last year with CHARLI XCX, well you can thank Baby Spice and co for that inspiration. People forget.  

But what happens when over the years, sounds, influences and ideas have blended beyond genre boundaries? What happens when the genre gene pool has become a metaphorical punch bowl, where you can add in whatever you want to create something unique, or even undeniable? It might not be to everyone's preferred tastes, but a lot of people are going to drink it. That’s where today’s band comes in; SLEEP TOKEN.  

Formed in London in 2016, the anonymous masked and cloaked outfit, fronted by Vessel, (A characterised ideology) released a couple of EPs before originally being picked up by Spinefarm Records, and have gone from strength to strength, to strength. In just a decade give or take, this alternative ensemble has sold out tours, gotten to number one in the UK album charts and have just recently headlined the Saturday of Download festival. That’s no mean feat let me tell you. KORN headlined the Sunday for the first time in their career this year, and they’ve been around since 1994! So, what’s the hype around this new cult of Sleep Token? Well, we’re about to attempt to find out...in theory, in practice and maybe even in vain. Nevertheless, now aligned with RCA Records for album number 4, this, is “Even In Arcadia”... 

The album, on face value at least sort of follows up thematically from 2023’s “Take Me Back To Eden”, as Arcadia itself refers to ancient Greece, and its own area of natural, peaceful beauty; simplicity, contentment and harmony. Vessel is clearly looking to write, and perform in order to channel himself, for a sense of purity and togetherness from not only his own sense of self preservation and worth, but his audience wanting a safe space too. He’s an incredibly poignant lyricist, so let’s get into that.  

Opening track “Look Into Windward” laments of an inner turmoil; facing the struggles or challenges of success, creation and identity. Instead of sailing with the wind, which let's admit outright, the band very much are in terms of success, Vessel see’s things differently. He’s sailing INTO the wind, pushing against the flow, any sense of natural order and fighting an uphill battle. From the very first verse we get a sense of tired tribalism. “Will you listen, just as my form starts to fission, losing this war of attrition just as I drift away”. Vessel is growing, evolving and wants to drive the art forward, and this could be interpreted as a frustrated acknowledgement of the division they create between fans of alternative music. They can’t escape an endless, thick air of negative criticism surrounding them from certain demographics. 

Lines like “I’ve got eyelids heavy enough to break diamonds” highlight Vessel's tiredness of it all, while the hypnotic, almost mystic repetition of the line “Will you halt this eclipse in me?” is the pained cry of an artist just looking to bare his soul, and not be overwhelmed and overshadowed by cynical and sardonic gatekeeping. All this is delivered with a wonderfully lulling, poetic often orchestral timbre, balanced by a fleeting bombardment of heavy riffs and percussion, really hammering home the metaphor of sailing against the wind. Potentially. A lengthy but lovely opener. 

The title track, “Even In Arcadia” starts off with the gentle tickling of a xylophone, almost like a windchime; quaint and peaceful, before this genuinely beautiful, flowing piano instrumentation wraps itself around your ear drums like a comforter. Vessel’s vocals here perfectly match the emotion of the track, softly crooned with a subtle vibrato, allowing an essence of vulnerability, as he sings of uncertainties in life. A deeply personal and private track of penance, but as the Gods sharpen their blades, he knows he still has wrongs to right and, there’s a powerful feeling of inner conflict and readiness for the battles that still lay ahead. As the track escalates, the added violins provide stunning orchestral accompaniment to an already opulent track, and it’s simply sublime. In places there’s an air of CELLDWELLER here at its most atmospheric and cinematic, and it’s easily an album highlight. 

Promotional singles like “Caramel” celebrate the unity and togetherness Sleep Token have amassed in their incredibly devout fanbase. Vessel is asking here for everyone who understands and appreciates, to follow...to literally stick to them like caramel. It’s going to be a messy journey, there will be obstacles, there will be hardship, but the key is unity. Lines like “Right foot in the roses, left foot on a landmine” highlight the almost trepidation felt, juggling success and criticism, just as “Wear me out like Prada, devil in my detail” showcase the cut-throat trend-based, fashionable aspects of the music industry, and how they face it head on. The personal battles don’t stop there either, as we have lyrics like “Can I get a mirror side-stage? Looking sideways at my own visage, getting worse, every time they try to shout my real name just to get a rise from me”. People are too obsessed with the who and the why...and they ignore the what and the when. What’s important here, is you have a band producing quality music, with a real deep connection with the fans, and many people want to dissect instead of digest, and play sleuth instead of living in the moment.  

Depth of song writing isn’t the main issue with Sleep Token thought...it’s their approach to music in general. As an alternative band, they’ve picked up momentum within the pages of say, Metal Hammer and Kerrang! etc, but because they aren’t primarily a metal band, or a rock band, they generate a lot of heat, especially in social media comment sections and posts. Sure, they are pigeonholed within such categories because of the fact they do utilise some truly crushing metalcore instrumental breakdowns and fills, but it’s part of a bigger picture. They incorporate a plethora of inspirations from acoustics, to orchestral, to contemporary pop, to indie, to hip-hop, to jazz, trap and R&B... they aren’t afraid to mix it up, bolder than the vast majority, and it works. 

​The issue Sleep Token have, is that, I believe, they’ve fallen into a trap of being the modern equivalent of Nu-Metal. Think about when LIMP BIZKIT became huge, Fred Durst was rapping over down tuned guitars and heavy tracks, bridging genre gaps. Really pissing metal fans off, because they became HUGE. LINKIN PARK did the same on albeit a more serious note, but the combination worked, and the sales of “Hybrid Theory” speak for themselves. Times have changed, styles and tastes have changed, but what Sleep Token are doing is blending genres, just like those aforementioned bands, and doing fucking well by doing so, because they write good songs, and people are relating. Old school metal fans don't like that, too many years of headbanging and warm cans of Red Stripe to be cognitive of evolution. How dare bands that don't fit into their idea of whatever the fuck they think is correct succeed. The absolute audacity! 

I’m not saying this as a new fan, there are elements to this that I am personally not a fan of, for transparency, but I respect the fuck out of Vessel and the band for doing what they are doing, the way they want to do it. Ignore the mystique of the masked personas and the cult-like charms they invoke, that’s been done to death let’s be honest. What matters is this lot have captured something special in the way they write and incorporate multiple influences, to mould this honestly captivating narrative in song. Time will tell how long they can keep the masks on, how the industry will affect their integrity and how far they can truly go within this gimmick and concept, but for the mean time, let’s simply appreciate Sleep Token for what they are. Young, talented songwriters and performers who are on top of their game. Black Sabbath just bowed out in spectacular style in Birmingham...and like it or not, Vessel may very well be the new Prince Of Darkness. These aren’t to be slept on. [8] 

The following review that you’re about to read, came about purely by chance, as, the band and album in question were not even on my radar, let alone my infinite list of shit to listen to. No, today’s review can be credited to Nikki Smash, who I write content for over at RIFF YARD MEDIA. Courtesy of ONE EYED TOAD RECORDS, SaN PR forwarded Nikki the upcoming debut album from Hertfordshire based metal outfit RAZE, entitled “Pyrography”, scheduled for release on July 28th, and he himself gave it the review for the RYM website. (Check that out here). 

So, you may be wondering where I come into it? Nikki has a brilliant mind and is a very smart dude when it comes to the music industry, but review writing isn’t something he does a great deal of, and so he asked me for my opinion on his review, because he felt he may have been a bit too harsh, or, blunt? You’re probably thinking, then why the fuck did he ask me of all people? Good question, but I read it over, and it was a very well put together, professionally critical piece of reviewing, that had no issues with its content whatsoever.  

He was worrying about nothing essentially. I always say if you genuinely think something, commit it to pen, no point in watering down integrity. This is where I then said, casually, it could have been worse, I could have reviewed it! We laughed, then it dawned on me that, I have a blog of my own, which brings us to the here and now. So, with that being said; if Nikki thought HE was being harsh, well, someone hold my beer damnit. New question; will this Raze to the occasion and impress me, or is this pyro going to go up like the Grenfell Tower; a poorly planned tragedy? Let’s find out... 

We open with “Maple”, but don’t expect bacon and pancakes, this ain’t no breakfast of champions. We get a deep, brooding guitar led opening with light cymbal's littering the background, before a more surging dose of melodic metal sweeps through, and it’s promising. The clean vocals have a very delicate baritone, before Louis Dunham takes off with a soaring chorus section. The ALTER BRIDGE and TREMONTI influences plain to see, and it's going well...before the growling. As it happens, the band threw LAMB OF GOD down as an influence too, so naturally the best thing to do is combine everything, and squeal like a rabid pig over parts of a generally decent song, ruining the ever-loving fuck out of it. It doesn’t fit, it does neither the track or Louis any favours, and is delivered with about as much grace as a coat hanger abortion.  

Follow up track “Better Off Alone” starts off harnessing more of a core heavy metal style, channelling further influences like MACHINE HEAD, but it also has an air of PANTERA to it in places. The heavier, guttural vocals do feel more at home here, as the instrumentation is more befitting of such a brutal approach; it isn’t jarring in any way, and the cleaner notes compliment the growls much better here. An admittedly sluggish, plodding riff carries the bulk of the track, and the guitar solo is sadly lost in a barrage of audible throat cancer, while drummer Ethan Morter smashes his plates like a bull in a China shop. Way overlayered here and it’s another potential highlight spoiled. 

Next up we have their most recent single “Roachman”, and this could be considered an album highlight. When they focus on clean melody, and incorporate their Southern-tinged hard rock, they actually have something decent going, as individually it is clear they are all incredibly competent performers and musicians, all of the potential is there, but there seems to be this need for everyone to be in the limelight, and these tracks at some point or another feel clustered and congested. Again, guttural vocals not necessary here, bringing the track down, and this one simply feels like two different tracks trying to work at once. Oh, and we HAVE to mention the video. Part live performance footage from their local town hall with all eleventeen people in attendance, part stop-motion claymation footage. Remember when CKY had that video for “Inhuman Creation Station” that was all stop-motion, that Bam directed? Yeah, this isn’t that. This is more like, Morph from “SMart”, but Mark Speight sculpted him AFTER he hung himself... 

The rest of the album finds itself in a bit of a pattern creatively. “C. Exigua” contains some quality guitar work and a pleasant solo, while “...Again” takes things too far, over-delivering on the fret-wankery, almost trying too hard. “Mellow Breeze” utilises some more crooned vocals for a slight change of pace but it’s quite anti-climactic, while “W.B.C.” again is very heavily layered in production. There is a lot going on here and we find another track blended in a messy, convoluted headache. Closing track “Blue Sky Vengeance” does have some enjoyable, funky bass lines that stand out because you can actually hear them here, but that’s about it for that. 

As stated, as musicians, these lads can very obviously play, and they are more than technically proficient. Yes, it’s their debut album, yes, they want all the bells and whistles and yes, they have the potential to deliver some genuinely strong material in the probably near future, but they need to rein it in a little and understand less can be more. A lot of the time they don’t allow each other room to breathe, and the result is an often time needlessly noisy album. “Pyrography” sounds like a combination of pyromania and pornography...which I guess they think is hot by some means of a burning passion? It’s more like gonorrhea if you ask me; treatable but best not to have it in the first place...[4] 

Merthyr Tydfil is no stranger to live music. Whether it’s a large outdoor gathering in Cyfarthfa Park, which has hosted everyone from DONNY OSMOND and MADNESS, to ANTI-FLAG and TAKING BACK SUNDAY, or whether it’s one of the towns smaller bars or, venues like The New Crown, or The Redhouse, who offer everything from local bands, karaoke, cover/tribute acts, or artists like KIDS IN GLASS HOUSES, TOPLOADER, HOLDING ABSENCE and WHEATUS. There’s always something for everyone. 

This includes heavy alternative music too, as for a good while, local promoter Scott Meredith would organise CELTIC MOSH, a monthly music night of some of the UK’s hardest, fresh, up and coming underground metal acts. He regularly brought the heavy...but, it’s safe to say, few expected the level of heaviness about to hit this traditionally industrial town tonight. On Wednesday, May 31st, RIFF YARD MEDIA was a welcomed guest in The Redhouse, as UK Goregrind / death ’n’ roll veterans CARCASS makes Merthyr their morgue for the evening...and they brought friends. Let's see what unfolds as we go headbanging in the heads of the valleys... 

As per, the day was an adventure purely because this reviewer had completely forgotten about the gig. I was on lunch at the day job, sat in the Sun enjoying a cigarette, checking my emails, when I open a message from HOLD TIGHT PR (Thank you Lisa) confirming my press allocation for the event. I initially think, awesome, look forward to that, let me double check when it is again...oh...it’s TONIGHT? Shit. This alters my evening. No boring sitcom–esque cliches needed but insert the absolute mad-rush montage here of me trying to get into Merthyr for the 7pm doors after work. Imagine Benny Hill but in Drop G tuning... 

Regardless, I get to Merthyr for AROUND 7pm(ish), and there is a noticeably unusual amount of people with Camo cargo shorts and denim battle vests, full of random-ass patches. You can tell there’s a metal gig going down. One lad had a U2 badge sewn on though...and I am quite surprised he wasn’t taken to where the streets have no name, and been subject to a Wednesday bloody Wednesday to the point where the local police still haven’t found what they're looking for. I digress. Heading up the steps at the entrance of The Redhouse, I get my entry wristband, grab a pint can from their café-turned-bar room and head in to prepare for tonight's only support act; CONJURER. 

The Warwickshire 4-piece (Consisting of guitarist/vocalist Dan Nightingale, guitarist/vocalist Brady Deeprose, bassist Conor Marshall and drummer Noah See) are on a mission to reduce the Redhouse to rubble tonight, and they probably could have given time. While their set begins sweetly enough with some acoustic backing track and blue mood lighting, they soon tear into “It Dwells” and for the next 45 minutes, there is zero respite. It’s a small venue, and every riff, every throat burning scorcher of a vocal line has nowhere to go but through you, as you feel the bass, physically pummelling your chest harder than the local Gurnos boy racer, with the newest copied Clubland CD on full volume in his second-hand stolen Vauxhall Corsa. Both vocalists are situated either side of the stage, allowing Conor to take FULL advantage of his long locks and windmill his hair like he’s been sponsored by Head & Shoulders. Honestly, it’s majestic. 

There’s little in the way of communication between band and crowd here as they mean business, as they soon switch into “Rot” for a “Pathos” double-header. The slower, doom aspects of their metal, with subtle djent qualities really scrapes the gutter for this death-inspired onslaught; it truly is unforgiving. “Suffer Alone” has a far faster pacing and the punk-rich percussion allows this death/thrash monster to just tear through this packed hall. ”Scorn”, taken off their debut EP “I” showcases their early material, and the dual approach of Dan, who has the deeper, demonic vocals, while Brady has the higher pitched visceral snarling, giving them an extra dynamic. At one point Dan just steps away from the mic and just growls into the crowd and we can still hear him fine. Impressive control and projection credit to him, the bear that he is. The crowd don’t need much warming up on this fine summer evening but, fair play, Conjurer came in hot.

It’s weird, right? We’re at the arse end of 2022, and Covid still crops up in the conversation regarding bands plans and ideas. Typically, you’d find that bands were a bit lost, because tours were cancelled, so they’d push some extra exclusive merch to compensate, or …they’d work on a cheeky EP to tide fans over, or even just jump straight into writing their next album. But oh no, not LORDI...

The Finnish Eurovision favourites decided fuck it; following 2020’s “Killection”, they weren’t going to get to work on the next album, or even a double-album, no, that’s too uninspired; unoriginal and quite frankly boring. The band decided to work on a concept BOX-SET, of SEVEN consecutive new and original albums,  between 2021-2022 under the banner of “Lordiversity”.  

A modern, retroactive time-capsule, it spans multiple genres, eras and sounds, spanning decades, covering the growth and evolution in fashionable rock ’n’ roll, but with that beastly, Lordi twist. The question is; can a bunch of pantomime shock rockers pull off such a feat? Let’s find out, as we plough through these 78 tracks, wishing they could have settled for an EP... 

The series starts off with “Skelectric Dinosaur” and we find ourselves back in the late 1970’s, where rock music was at that initial turning point. That transition between the more innocent, formative rock ‘n’ roll, swing and more blues influenced styles, to what we now refer to separately as classic rock.  It opens up with “SCG Minus 7: The Arrival” and with its church organs, haunting wails and children's giggles, telling you that “Monsters are coming” …it’s quite the creepy introduction. This however leads us into disappointment, as we’re greeted with first track proper; “Day Off Of The Devil”.  

Musically absolutely fine for the style they are going for, imagine, KANSAS, or, ALICE COOPER or even BLUE OYSTER CULT, they’ve nailed that classic guitar tone and recording quality, credit to them, and it’s a decent, chilled out rock track, however the intro promised something a lot more sinister. The question is, how DOES the devil spend his days off? Is he there with a bowl of Coco Pops, sat on the couch in his pyjamas watching Disney+ on a Saturday morning? Who knows.... who cares...not me.  

“Starsign Spitfire” has a very slow, plodding pace to it, while it does have some decent backing vocal harmonies elevating the chorus. “The Tragedy Of Annie Mae” has a very DEEP PURPLE-esque bass-line fuelling the track and it rumbles along nicely. We do eventually finish album one off with “...And Beyond The Isle Was Mary”, and we get a quaint, piano-filled piece with rainy sound effects, resulting in a gentle closing number.  They nailed the sound of the era and have delivered well here overall; it’s not a bad start. 

Next up we have the album “Superflytrap” and we transition rather quickly from the origins of rock and early metal, into the bright lights of the discotheque. The intro piece, “SCG Minus 6: Delightful Pop-Ins" is totes cringe babes, with the porn parody content. Some bimbo taking in the pizza guy, and the pool guy, like some seedy classic blue-movie plot-segue, until the monster breaks in and there’s screaming and terror, and it’s all a bit shit. I pray Asylum don’t read this; their movies are bad enough as it is... 

The actual opening tracks “Macho Freak” and “Believe Me” are a bit better. It’s not always easy to recreate that nostalgic disco/club vibe musically with it coming out authentic, but credit to a band like Lordi, they’ve managed it. The funk-fuelled synths, alongside the twangy guitars, in this day and age remind me of DEREK BISHOP if you’re interested in modern disco, and to be fair, the band, despite their appearance, don’t sound cheesy doing this. “Bella From Hell” capitalises on some genuinely soulful backing vocals, while “Cast Out From Heaven” tries to be a genuine ballad, and, let's be honest, the vocals do NOT suit this approach. This is too jarring.  

Where do we go from here?  Album number three; “The Masterbeast From The Moon”, and we enter prog-rock territory. Inspired by the likes of PINK FLOYD etc, it’s a more ambitious piece but do a band like Lordi have the ability to pull this off? Let’s get one thing straight here, no... the answer is no. “Moonbeast” utilises an almost GHOST-like character instrumentally but that’s genuinely as good as it gets. The praise ends here. “Hurricane Of The Slain” highlights this point as, the piano rich, orchestrally led strings of the track are gorgeous, but the clash with the gruff vocals absolutely ruins things. It’s all well and good trying new things musically, but when the vocals are so often stagnant, it has a detrimental effect on the entire project. “Church Of The Succubus” at over 11 minutes fits better in the whole prog-rock aesthetic, but even that can’t save this record.  

What do we have next? “Abusement Park”, and I can’t lie to you, I do love a play on words; this title tickles me. It reminds me of JOHNNY KNOXVILLE in the film “Action Point”, but I digress. The title track absolutely reeks of classic heavy metal with the pacing, the key transitions, the style of percussion, it’s got a semi-MOTORHEAD vibe to it as well as the likes of W.A.S.P., almost power-metal in places, and it’s very up-tempo and energetic. It can be a bit cheesy with some incredibly cliched names like “Ghost Train” and “Rollercoaster”, but it’s to be expected. “Carousel” has some wonderfully emotive, smooth, sensual guitar playing that reek of the 80’s, while “Pinball Machine” harbours this strong AC/DC, or, JUDAS PRIEST level of vocal screeching.  

“Nasty, Wild & Naughty” harbours all of that overdone rock ’n’ roll sleaze lyrically, despite being a catchy piece of rock with all of the cowbell, before “Merry Blah Blah Blah” comes out of the blue as a Christmas single. The bells and choirs are there, the Santa references are there... but do you know what is also there? Me, making Ebeneezer Scrooge feel uncomfortable with my lack of festive spirit. Pull a cracker, the joke will be this song, I promise. I mean, WHY?! 

Next up we have “Humanimals” and we’ve reached our more, BON JOVI and AOR inspired tracks, and it shows. Opening track proper “Borderline” has a real, I guess, bon-jovial vibe to it (I’m sorry) with its light, up-beat synths and almost hushed percussion. The chorus houses some smoother gang vocals and its honestly quite the pleasant little track instrumentally. “Victims Of The Romance” utilises a more guitar driven approach in comparison but it reeks of that, all-too parodied hair-metal era. If you choose to picture Lordi with mullets in spandex, well, that challenging wank is on YOU my friend. “The Bullet Bites Back” stands out with its genuinely sleek guitar tones, and especially it’s solo, before we revisit “Like A Bee To The Honey”. A decent piece (Written by KISS) but, two years old, and practically becoming filler at this point.  

Our penultimate album, “Abracadaver” leans further into the emergence of what we now fondly refer to as modern metal, with that transitional period, from the mid to late 1980’s into the 1990’s. Ignoring the now tedious intro bit, we dive into “Devilium”, and we’re met with a bombardment of riffs, old-school thrash metal aesthetics and vocals that could make onions cry. The title-track isn’t much better truth be told. You CAN hear “Big-4” elements but the track does eventually descend into utter fret-wankery. “Beast Of Both Worlds” is arguably as good as it gets on this one, with it’s very SLAYER-esque chugging riff-work and rhythmic snarls. Done well enough but, beyond dated. 

Finally, then, and oh how glad I am knowing this (Excited for this one? Hell no, I’m just glad this is over with), we round things up with “Spooky Sextravaganza Spectacular” and that name alone reeks of ROB ZOMBIE. “Demon Supreme” utilises darker synths and a semi-industrial aesthetic to give the ol' Dragula a right good rear ending. It’s a touch repetitive but it’s got an energy to it and reminds me of POWERMAN 5000 in ways. “Lizzard Of Oz” houses more chugging riffs, with a strong electronic core sound, something which a more industrial metal unit might partake-in.  

“Skull And Bones (The Danger Zone)” repeats this seemingly Rob Zombie inspired instrumental direction, with it sounding aesthetically very similar. “Shake The Baby Silent” is top quality parenting advice it has to be said, Mr. Lordi collecting his dad of the year award over here, well done. Skip the bottle feed, jump straight to infanticide. It took seven albums but we do actually get our first actual stand-out highlight in the form of “Terror Extra-Terrestrial”. The intro spoils it a little bit, with its E.T parody segue, but we get a frankly quirky piece of synth-driven hard rock, and it’s honestly rather catchy. We ultimately finish up very ironically however, with the track “Anticlimax”...and I’m not even going to make any jokes here, the audio speaks for itself. After seven albums, completing this seventy-eight-track endurance test has to be rewarded in some aspect surely? Not in the slightest. 

Lordi tried something different here; they have to applauded for their creative ambition, that’s without question. What DOES need to be questioned though, is why the hell they couldn’t do seven concept EP’s instead of seven full bloody albums? They could have very easily cherry-picked specific highlights, and made a far more digestible, and more importantly, enjoyable listening experience. Seventy-eight tracks, allows for far, far too much filler, and truth be told, fodder. They managed to occasionally hit certain spots musically, and instrumentally to diversify these albums into their genre’s, which is the entire point OF “Lordiversity” as a concept, but vocally they just aren’t capable of really delivering; it’s very one-dimensional for the most part, and that grates over time.

In summary... Monstrous? Check. Mediocre? Also check. If concept albums are your thing, love anthologies and collecting box-sets, or simply are a die-hard Lordi fan, you'll likely enjoy this for what it is. If you specifically like a certain style or genre, feel free to sift through your own preferences accordingly, you MIGHT get something out of it, but, as a complete package, this is at a level of grandiosity Lordi really shouldn't be dabbling in. For me? This review is finally over...give me a hard rock hallelujah! [4]

Allow me to preface the following review, with an outpouring of regret, grief, more regret, bewilderment and, a little bit more regret, through a literary veil of self-therapy. There was absolutely zero reason, obligating me to conduct the following review, but, at the same time, there was absolutely EVERY reason that I couldn’t NOT do this review. This is the review equivalent of Hogan v Warrior at WrestleMania VI, but with more baby oil...let me set the stage. 

You know by now that, while I am perfectly capable of writing a decent, or at the very least, serious review, whether here or over on ALL ABOUT THE ROCK, I get my kicks out of the more, unusual and questionable releases available to me. I can point my finger at the likes of, KIM PETRAS, or, going back to COREY FELDMAN; I like a challenge, but this is the sort of thing that can break a man. This can Brokeback Mountain the fuck out of a man...this is “Ram Ranch” by GRANT MACDONALD, and I blame young Charlie Bryant for this 1 hour and 7 minutes of audio torture. Even the inmates at Guantanamo Bay would feel sorry for me here, but, fuck it...saddle up, we’re going in (Dry)… 

Firstly, who IS Grant Macdonald? Little is known about this alleged Canadian, other than that he might be Canadian, and his name might be Grant Macdonald...he’s like the BANKSY of homoerotic cowboy rock. The album we’re tackling today originally came out in 2012, so, aside from being a rare case of retrospective reviewing from me, we’ve had a decade to process, and at times, begrudgingly accept “Ram Ranch”. It’s been used as pro-LGBTQ+ content in protests and rallies, and over its existence it became a running meme and an ongoing source of absurdity. To this day Grant has apparently released SIX HUNDRED variants of “Ram Ranch”, which is frankly both impressive and alarming. Dude has a passion, what can I say? With that said, the only way is down, as we process this piece of... art? 

The album opens up with the title track, and, we initially have a dose of rather subdued heavy metal instrumentation, with all of the riffs, licks and kick drums. I say subdued because it’s practically background noise. On a production level, it’s like a demo in terms of audio quality, but the capability is there, that in itself is promising...but it’s the vocal content that draws attention here.  

Allow me to set the tone lyrically; “18 naked cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch, big hard throbbing cocks wanting to be sucked, 18 naked cowboys wanting to be fucked? Cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch on their knees wanting to suck cowboy cocks; Ram Ranch really rocks!”. This is the primary content of the track from start to finish, and it’s the absurdity of this that, at first, makes it mildly amusing and, quite distressing simultaneously. The worst bit? The spoken-word over metal sounds like, CHILLS, arguably THE WORST YouTube narrator in the history of the internet, got a record deal. The repetition and looping of track one IS painful, sure, but we have 11 tracks left. Even my Jack Daniel’s needs a Jack Daniel’s... 
 
Second track “Plowboy” has such a reverberated overlay of vocal samples, it becomes an absolute trippy mess from the moment it starts, with some, moog-esque synths, setting the tone for some almost 70’s porn rock sleaze. It’s the kind of thing to make your eye twitch, which one all depends on you and your tastes, I’m not here to discriminate. 

Next up we have, “Cowboys Fucking Cowboys” and, you remember when KID ROCK was like, “I wanna’ be a Cowboy baby!”? Yeah, we’re going to shatter his dreams right now. The gentle acoustics here could easily, EASILY be used for a more serious, affectionate country ballad, but there’s so much lyrical cowboy fucking here, riding butthole’s deep...it’s like...you know when ROGER ALAN WADE did “If You’re Gonna’ Be Dumb” for JACKASS, but instead of a montage of stunts, it was gay porn...that about sums it up. 
 
“Prince Harry” returns abruptly to that riff-heavy metal musicality, and it’s a wonder how the ever-loving fuck he got away with this one. I don’t know if this would be art, slander, or character assassination, but telling him to ride those big hard ram ranch cowboy cocks, bouncy, bouncy up and down, up and down, drink that cum, ram another cock up your royal bum? I don’t even know where the line is legally with this. I think of Harry now, in 2022, but this was ten years ago, ok Harry was still 28 at the time, but Christ. This is worse than that time he wore that Nazi costume to a party and made the front page. Who would have thought THAT could be topped? 

Next up, I feel personally attacked, as we have “Suck That Cock Gavin”, and, no. Firstly I’m not even joking, that’s that track name! I’m barely here to listen to the album, I’m certainly not signing up for that. I recently reviewed VR SEX and not even they were that immersive, calm the fuck down Grant! Or at least buy me dinner first!? I’ll take the salad, hold the ram ranch dressing please... 

“Big Hard Cowboy Cock” sounds like, generic mid 90’s WCW music, excluding the lyrics, obviously, Ted Turner wouldn’t tolerate that. Imagine like, the Nitro Girls were gay cheerleaders? Disco Inferno and Alex Wright would have much better careers. ” Hard Horsecock” implies that we’re entering the world of bestiality here now, and I don’t even know what I can get away with. We’ve all heard the phrase ‘hung like a horse’, but this is sung like a cunt. “12 Inch Cock” has industrialised metal elements but it’s more like, queer factory than FEAR FACTORY, while “Stable Boy” houses a more urbanised gangsta-rap / hip-hop aesthetic, but it drops more soap than it does bars. 

Ultimately, whoever Grant Macdonald is...he’s committed. Or at least he should be. Credit to him, I can barely think of the words to sum this up. Not since AC/DC has an artist produced so much content with so little substance. Sure, he’s able to mix it up musically, utilising rock and metal, country and Americana, as well as hip-hop, so he’s technically actually better than AC/DC, but lyrically and vocally, I’m assuming it’s something you have to be in-on, or, ‘get’.

Ideal for reaction videos, or making friends and family question you when they hear you play it on Spotify, but, at over an hour long, it’s not a fun album in the slightest, and once the initial shock wears off, and you’ve done the whole “Wtf?” head shake, it very quickly becomes monotonous and boring. Let’s be honest, there’s only so much hard throbbing cowboy cock you can take, y’know? No? Ok then... [0]

What is there to say about 2020, that hasn't already been said? Within these reviews over the past nine months I've light-heartedly made reference to issues like Covid-19 and such, but let's not detract from the seriousness of the whole situation. As a calendar year, 2020 was one of the most difficult, frustrating, upsetting and confusing in recent history, and this isn't strictly down to Coronavirus...this time last year we were on the brink of World War 3! Politics has been a shambles, social injustice has been rife, the divide in both community spirit and the classes seemingly continues to grow, and generally speaking, the world is a complete mess. Luckily we've had music to keep us going, if not to keep us sane, and for that at least I am grateful. The images above showcase my personal highlights of 2020, grouped in categories covering pop, metal, EP's and general favourites, and it shows that, despite the state of the world, music flourishes. Music and the arts are SO important, as many of us learned during national lockdown, and we need to appreciate the people who dedicated their lives to creating that art SO much, because times like these prove we'd be lost without them. 

I mean, just looking at the cover art above, it's been as diverse a year as any. MILEY CYRUS embraced her inner rocker on her new album, having collaborated with the likes of BILLY IDOL and JOAN JETT. Groups like STEPS made an unexpected comeback showing they've still got it in an ever changing pop industry, as did MELANIE C. From a metal standpoint, PARADISE LOST prove they just get better with age, as they not only released one of the albums of their career, they also found themselves in the UK Top 40! Imagine that! Goth metal on Radio 1! It gives hope to newer acts like SOUTH OF SALEM who delivered a truly stunning debut album, and certify themselves as ones to watch for sure. There have also been plenty of superb EP's released over the past twelve months...especially VV. Ville Valo surprised everyone with his 3-track EP and HIM fans rejoiced at the new material, I for one certainly cannot wait to hear more from him. CHRISTINE AND THE QUEENS put emphasis on the art as their whole EP was turned into one big choreographed music video which was impressive, while I personally made some brilliant discoveries in the form of LUCIA & THE BEST BOYS and JACKIE. 

Finally then, my official albums of the year, and I was spoiled for choice to be fair. THE BIRTHDAY MASSACRE always deliver, they never release a bad album and I'm looking forward to catching up with Chibi on the rescheduled tour dates. MARILYN MANSON dropped his best album in years much to my delight, having found his last couple a little bit boring (Sorry Mazza!), GREY DAZE tugged at the heartstrings with a touching tribute to the late Chester Bennington, releasing unheard material from his pre-LINKIN PARK days, reminding us all how much we'll miss such a talented, brilliant human being. NINJA SEX PARTY on the other hand proved they remain one of the funniest groups around with their bonkers writing style, comedic lyricism and story-telling and wholesome attitude. Yes, 2020 has been a bit of a mess to say the least, but we've still got music, and as fans of that music, we've still got one another, and as a community, we need to hold on to that. With that said, below, is my official GTGC Spotify playlist of 2020, with 40 hand-picked tracks spanning the above records, and it is dedicated to my very good friend Scot 'JD' Rees, who is sadly no longer with us in body, but will forever be with us in heart and spirit. Whether he had a Jack & Coke in his hand, or his guitar, he was always laughing at something, and his energy for enjoyment was infectious. I will miss you Scot, and this compilation is for you. X

Remember the phenomenon that was ‘Chuck Norris Facts’? The man / minor deity can do so many astonishing yet equally absurd things, like, being able to make fire by rubbing ice cubes, or, being the only person able to kick you in the back of the face, or even being able to speak French…in Russian. I could go on (Literally I can read them for hours and laugh to myself quite contently) but it’s that last one that tediously links me to today’s band because I am unable to just, review things normally. Yes, allow me to introduce you to today’s band; L’HOMME ABSURDE.

Hailing from Moscow, Russia, yet with a French name that translates as ‘The Absurd Human’, L’Homme Absurde are a progressive post-hardcore five-piece, consisting of vocalist Alexey Slavin, guitarists Alexandr Safronov & Roman Savenkov, bassist Pavel Gorshkov and drummer Evgeny Loboda, and they’ve been gradually building their reputation since their formation in 2016. With their fusion of metalcore and melodic black metal, they hope to continue to spread their absurdity across Europe with their newest album “Belong”…but do they belong in my ears? Noob Heavy PR asked me to check it out…

The album opens up with “0” which is pretty appropriate given the way this album kicks off…it’s all about momentum, all is still as we get nothing but relaxed percussion and some semi-dreamscape acoustic instrumentation while the record comes to life, as it’s pulse strengthens,  but we suddenly find ourselves enveloped in a blanket of brutally tortured vocals and a more metallic approach in tone, despite its melodic retention. It gives us a sense of artistic drive and direction early on, for sure. First track proper then “Rot” capitalises on the surging blackened metal tendencies the band have by pummelling the listener with a barrage of semi-psychotic instrumentation. Equally melodic yet mauling; it summarises the bands sounds wonderfully.

This can be said of album highlight “Separation” too which takes an almost early post-punk direction with the initial guitars, before we break into more snarled vocals and post-hardcore riff work; this is arguably as catchy as things get over the course of these eight tracks, finding it’s home between the likes of KVELERTAK and MAN THE MACHETES. It’s up-beat and rocking, all the while groove rich and melodic, and a superb piece of modern metal. Elsewhere “Burn” and “Forsaken” continue this approach of searing blackened melodies while incorporating subtle doom atmospherics into the more traditional metal guitar work, before we eventually finish up on ”Sanctuary”. The semi-acoustic opening and soft vocals allowing for a sense of closure and finality to wind the mood down somewhat…or so we thought, as this too erupts into a visceral barrage of pained vocals at the tracks midway point, peaking with a final flurry, before the low-key instrumentation transitions right back into “0” and we appropriately come full circle, as the album essentially loops, which is cleverly done.

Overall, while Russia isn’t exactly prominent in the world metal scene in terms of household names, L’Homme Absurde are clearly equipped to throw down with some of their more established Scandinavian neighbours. Blackened metalcore may sound a touch niche on paper but there’s enough here in terms of subtle variety to at least warrant checking this out for most fans of alternative heavy music. It’s a solid album and one that could potentially find them larger audiences across Europe, and to suggest otherwise would be, well, absurd. [6]