There comes a time when we must pause and honour not only the mountaintop triumphs, but every bit of the journey in between. "Watching The Sky", is a four-disc tribute to THE BANGLES, those Los Angeles daughters who would dream beyond the constrictive limits of what society would have them think was possible for women in rock and roll.

​When Susanna Hoffs and the Peterson sisters, Vicki and Debbi, first sat down together in the early 1980s, they were a part of a movement that history would name the Paisley Underground. However, they were part of something greater: a soft revolution that declared, in the gentle power of jangly guitars and breezy harmonies, that creativity is not female, that talent is not limited, and that the human spirit will always manage to sing.

In tracks such as "Getting Out Of Hand" and "Call On Me", we don't hear the state-of-the-art perfection of their subsequent commercial peak, but something more precious, the raw ambition of young performers denied a platform. These bonus cuts are a reminder that every dream first has to be dreamed in darkness before it can shine in the light.

Their inaugural record in 1984, "All Over The Place", provides the background for this collection with the visionary declaration of "Hero Takes A Fall". Here was a group that understood, maybe instinctively, that heroism does not translate to never falling but getting up every time we fall. The cross between 1960s-style melodies and power-pop sensibilities on the record yielded something new, a sound at once retro and new, familiar and dissonant.

With "Different Light" The Bangles truly arrived in their promised land. "Manic Monday", that gift of mercy from Prince himself, had been their burning bush; almost a sudden flash of divine musical intervention announcing to the world that these four women would not, could not be ignored. When they told us to "Walk Like An Egyptian", millions obeyed, dancing to a beat that transverses cultural boundaries and united people in the simple joy of music.

The use of live cuts and extended versions on these albums illuminates the extent of The Bangles' abilities. The live medley of "Walking Down Your Street" and "James" demonstrates how they can take studio productions and make them breathing, living things that reached directly into the hearts of their audience.

Their final studio album, "Everything", completes this set with the fiery passion of their enduring ballad. "Eternal Flame" wasn't merely a song, a prayer, even, a musing on love's unending power beyond the fleeting nature of all things on this planet. When Susanna Hoffs sang those words, she spoke for every heart that ever loved with all its might, ever dared to hope against hope, ever believed some things are everlasting indeed.

The wealth of this collection, with John Earls' thoughtful essay to boot, is both celebration and education. We learn of Michael Steele's addition in 1983, her career from THE RUNAWAYS to complete the classic line-up. We witness the in-fighting leading to their breakup in 1989, a reminder that even the most sing-alike voices can occasionally get out of tune.

But what most comes to the forefront in these four discs is recognition of what THE BANGLES did in their brief lifespan. In an industry that too often pushed women onto the periphery, they claimed centre stage. In a universe that demanded they sacrifice commercial success or artistic integrity, they made such choices appear false dilemmas.

The B-sides and oddities scattered about on these discs, “What I Meant To Say", the transcendent dub version of "Hazy Shade Of Winter", remind us that art must be allowed beyond the confines of radio-friendly constructions. The Bangles understood that every song, whether destined for the charts or consigned as a bonus track, held within it the seed of human expression.

As I reflect on this record, I am reminded that action in any field, civil rights, music, human evolution, occurs not due to sweeping action, but due to the cumulative strength of individual acts of courage. Each time The Bangles took the stage, each time they harmonized together with each other in that perfect harmony, each time they defied being belittled by an industry that discounted their efforts, they rang a bell for justice and equality that still rings.

"Watching The Sky" is more than a box set, it is a document of dreams realized, of extended vacations taken, of harmony achieved both musically and socially. By keeping these recordings alive for centuries to come, we ensure that the fire The Bangles lit will continue to burn, inspiring new dreamers to pick up their instruments and add their voices to the great chorus of human expression.

The reach of music history is great, but it curves toward justice. The Bangles helped warp it, one flawless harmony at a time. This anthology is tribute and invitation alike, a remembering of what was done and an incitement to artists yet to come to keep coming, to keep singing, to keep singing about how beauty can move us, how love can overcome even the most deeply rooted of divisions.

Finally, The Bangles didn't merely gaze upward into the sky, instead, they reached up, grasped it in their hands, and sent us all a piece of heaven. This box set ensures their place in history will never dwindle, a beacon for all bold enough to imagine a world in which music knows no bounds and genius has no limits.

Score 9/10. Not in deficiency, but in reverence. For even the flame that burns eternal leaves room for the sky above it. And the sky, is vast. Words: Matt Denny.

LIVING COLOUR’s guitar virtuoso VERNON REID launches his fourth solo album "Hoodoo Telemetry". [Editor: Cold open much!] This record feels less like an album and more of a public execution of anyone foolish enough to think they can play guitar. I put it on, and suddenly every clumsy note I’ve ever hit comes rushing back, mocking me, so I launched my guitar at the wall.

"Door Of No Return" sets the tone immediately. There’s no warm-up, no mercy. Vernon cuts straight into the strings, leaving scorch marks across the air. He isn’t playing; he’s dismantling, and MY guitar is now dismantled courtesy of the wall.

Then comes "The Haunting". The title is too neat, but the music earns it. The track breathes in smoke and exhales fire. Every note carries memory and menace. I can’t turn it off, though it makes me want to set fire to my own, now fully shattered guitar and walk away.

"Bronx Paradox" is chaos held together by sheer willpower. Brass stabs, glitching rhythms, guitars carving through the mess, it shouldn’t work, but he bends it into shape. Meanwhile, I’m stuck wrestling an instrument that refuses to obey me.

By "Black Fathom Five", the bitterness has taken over. It’s heavy, drowning and it’s smothering. Vernon yet again absorbs his guitar until you can’t tell where one ends and the other begins. I’ve never managed anything close.

"Hoodoo Telemetry" doesn’t offer comfort or answers. It just offers a mirror, and for me, that reflection is ugly and shows an obsession with a craft I can’t master, sharpened by the sound of someone who already has.

There’s no point giving it a number. This isn’t a scorecard. It’s a reminder that Vernon Reid is untouchable. I’m still staring at the embers of my own guitar in the fire.

Vernon has stated that this album’s "Like a piece of my all-over-the-place mind". That’s one fucked up mind and a stupidly talented one at that. 

Words: Matt Denny. 

Gather round, you perfumed bastards and flea-bitten mongrels. The Rock n Roll throne’s groaning under me, and I’ve still got spit left to fling.

Beth Blade is back like a punch in the face with broken glass in your mouth and her mascara smeared into last week’s hangover. She is a force of nature on this album. Ms. Blade roars, wails, purrs, struts and often within eight bars. She has the sort of voice that makes you either fall hopelessly in love or sprain something in sympathy. The band behind her are tighter than a nuns chuff, sharper than broken glass and you get the impression they could bash out an anthem blindfolded in the middle of a motorway and still have time to pick up milk on the way home.

"Vintage Rebel x Trauma Bond" is essentially at its core, two albums sharing a flat. One of them smokes cigars, wears leather trousers and insists on telling you about how the 1970s were better, and the other spends evenings staring into the mirror wondering if the mirror’s staring back. Together they make an oddly compelling couple, though not the sort you’d invite to dinner unless you’ve already hidden the best glassware.

​The “Vintage Rebel” portion honour's rock history with its heavy nods to KISS, THIN LIZZY and Y&T. This is six songs of brisk, swaggering rock and roll. “Never Let Go” opens the proceedings with shoulders squared and boots firmly stomped, before handing you over to “You Only Love Me When You’re Drunk”, which is, incidentally, the sort of title that makes you think someone’s been reading my fan mail. “Down The Front” has the cheerful energy of a pub lock-in gone on two hours too long, while “A Rock N Roll Romance” drags in GORILLA RIOT’s Arjun Bhishma, who sounds as though he’s arrived halfway through the party and promptly started rearranging the CD collection into the Cyrillic alphabet.

​Then, after a brief intermission (Presumably for Wild Turkey, tears, or both), we stumble into the other half of the house: “Trauma Bond” explodes and explores emotional struggle, giving depth and contrast. “Colour Of Our Bones” has the kind of weight that makes you want to sit down, preferably somewhere padded, and “Dysmorphia” does that clever trick of sounding simultaneously furious and fragile, .The we have “You Never Screamed?” I did, but I don't think anyone heard, and “Eclipse” ends things by pulling the curtains shut with both hands.

Some critics will say it’s uneven, two personalities stitched into one body. I say that’s the fucking point. Who says Rock n Roll needs symmetry to be interesting? Great Rock and Roll needs wobble and unpredictability, otherwise, it’s just a particularly loud operetta.

Beth Blade & The Beautiful Disasters - "Vintage Rebel x Trauma Bond" Is released independently on September 9th 

Score: 7 Abby Normal brains out of Twelvty. Words: Matt Denny.

This is a review that I'm surprised to be writing. It's also where you're gonna' see me do the rare negative review, as I don't usually write about things that I'm not excited about. 

HELLOWEEN is an ok group, but like most Power Metal bands, it falls flat for me; their new album, "Giants And Monsters" (Out on August 29th, 2025), is no exception. You see, the problem with these types of bands is that I'm bored by the fifth track, and with this new Helloween album, I was bored by the THIRD track. Don't get me wrong, they're very good at what they do, and their long-time fans will be very pleased with this record … which is great, that's the beauty of music, it hits each and every one of us differently, as each and every one of us is different from the person next to us.

The first track is called “Giants On The Run”, and during its nearly 6 and a half minutes you will find things that will bring to mind modern era JUDAS PRIEST, a bit of the only King that matters, KING DIAMOND, but even this, the one song I liked, is more of a miss than it is a hit. Realistically, it would be a much better song if they shaved a minute and twenty seconds off its runtime.

Track 2, “Savior Of The World”, is where my attention began to wander. As Lars Ulrich would say, it sounds stock, which isn't in any way a compliment. Thankfully it's about 2 minutes shorter than its predecessor, but even that can't save it from being completely unremarkable.

I have to admit, though I did make it through the full record, track three, “A Little Is A Little Too Much", is where I stopped on subsequent listens. I mean, literally shut the album off before the one minute mark. My attention was everywhere but on the music, making this an utter failure in terms of quality and bringing in new fans.

With fifteen gold records, six platinum records and over TEN MILLION records sold, there's plenty of proof that Helloween is a talented group, but "Giants And Monsters" is a lacklustre effort. It just does nothing for me, but as I said earlier, long-time fans of Helloween will enjoy this album, and I hope that I am among the few that don't find it appealing.

Score: 2 Mouldy Prop Pumpkins Off Of A John Carpenter Haddonfield Set, Out Of 10.

Words: Tom Hanno.

This is a proper archive. Not like that CD of “Ambient rave classics” someone posted through my letterbox last week with a note that said “Listen or die". This is the real stuff. Canon. Fibreglass glory. "Made In Japan" is reissued in a way that respects municipal codes and the spiritual hygiene of live rock documentation. Five compact discs. Ten vinyl's. A Blu-ray. It’s what we used to call in the parish council a SIGNIFICANT UNDERTAKING.

They've got EVERYTHING. Osaka. Tokyo. Gillan yelping like a dog who's just been shown a gas bill. Blackmore noodling with the same face I’ve seen on regional bus drivers stuck in fourth gear. The whole band is just GOING AT IT, in a manner that would be considered inappropriate in a school gymnasium.

I haven’t seen such attention to detail since I catalogued the ceremonial spoons of the Pennine Tent Revival. They’ve included edits from Germany AND Mexico. International versions. Like "Eurovision", but with proper trousers.

Steven Wilson’s done the remixing. I don’t know the man, but I imagine him as the sort of person who alphabetises his dental records. And thank God he does. Every crash of the cymbals now feels like an official letter. Every organ swell is logged. If I close my eyes, I can almost smell the parquet flooring of the Budokan. I can see the usherette, probably cold.

And it's LOUD. Not your modern, shapeless “Festival” loud. No. This is 1972 loud. The kind of volume that would have required planning permission and a laminated safety sheet. The songs are long, often with no clear exit strategy. “Space Truckin’" goes on for weeks. I lost track of time. At one point I believed I was in a multi-story car park in Nagoya with a very cross Ritchie Blackmore handing out felt tipped pens.

There are liner notes. Roger Glover says it felt magical. That’s as emotional as he gets. Jon Lord doesn’t say anything as he’s dead, but his Hammond still haunts the air like a disgruntled former mayor.

This isn’t a “Deluxe Edition". It’s a CORRECTIVE. A historical artefact retrieved from the embers of improper archiving. Finally—after decades of partial data and sonic guesswork—we can say with absolute confidence what DEEP PURPLE sounded like in Japan. And it’s all above board.

Highly recommended for fans of rock, audit trails, and responsible live sound engineering.

Score: 8 Richie Blackmores - 0 Yngwie Malmsteens - [Editor: Sounds like a pre-season football score!] 

Words: Matt Denny.

You know how sometimes you find a really good biscuit behind the sofa, and you don’t even remember putting it there, but you take one bite and it’s like--BOOM!—jammy centre, crunchy edge, everything amazing all at once, and you shout “YES PLEASE!” even though you’re entirely alone and probably meant to be vacuuming? Well, "Go!" by ROULETTE is just like that! Except with fewer crumbs, more guitars, and absolutely no raisins, which is ideal.

From the very first track, I knew I was in for a treat. It’s got that sort of big, zoomy sound that makes you want to leap onto a moving car and shout encouraging things at people doing stunts. You can really feel the drums in your knees, and the guitars are doing that lovely thing where they sound like they’re about to burst into flames, but in a polite and very Swedish way.

And the SINGING! I don’t know who taught this man to do that with his voice, but I hope they got a medal and a chocolate orange. He hits notes that made my ears go all fizzy—like pop rocks in a glass of lemonade—and then he swoops down into the sort of growly bits that make you want to phone your mum to say, “Hi, love you, everything’s fine, but I’ve just heard something AMAZING.”

There’s this one song—I think it’s called “What Are We Looking For” or possibly “Strangers” or maybe “Please Mind the Gap” (No, hang on, that might’ve been something else)—but anyway, it really goes for it. Just when you think it’s finished being brilliant, it pops back up with a solo that made me throw a cushion across the room in celebration. The cat didn’t like that, but sacrifices must be made in the pursuit of ROCK.

There’s this one with a keyboard bit that sounds like lasers doing jazz hands. I didn’t even know I needed that in my life, but I did. Ten out of ten.

The whole album is like being invited to a very loud party on a spaceship piloted by Bon Jovi, and everyone’s wearing leather trousers but no one’s being weird about it. It’s proper melodic rock, but not in a “Dad’s had two lagers and wants to talk about Boston” kind of way—more, “Let’s build a time machine and high-five 1986” sort of thing.

In conclusion: if this album were a dessert, it would be a triple-layer cake filled with fire and determination and probably some kind of highly flammable jam. I loved it. I played it three times in a row and then accidentally saluted my stereo. Honestly, I haven’t been this excited since I discovered you can fry cheese.

​So yes—Roulette’s "Go!" is spiffing. Loud, shiny, and extremely good at making you feel like your hair is longer than it is. I give it seven guitars, a drum kit, and a massive Swedish flag made entirely out of joy. [Editor: Is that out of 10 Matt or out of a Keenan & Kel outro?] GO get it! (See what I did there? Because of the name? Oh well. I'll see myself out.)

Words: Matt Denny

They say that nice guys finish last...nice guys get walked over, nice guys get overlooked; but not every nice guy is arguably the hottest property in rock and roll right now. Finish last? (Firstly, that’s the gentlemanly thing to do). Some nice guys are just truly getting started, because they are beginning at breaking point...sick and tired of the snapped synapse that is the music industry. Sick of the disconnect between corporate greed and the common man. Sick of the bullshit. They want to make the world better... 

Artists with good intentions DO come and go...BOB GELDOF tried the whole “Band Aid” thing, and it was literally like putting a Hello Kitty plaster over a glioblastoma. Forty years later Bob, you’ve re-released the same track more than once with fresh line-ups, gradually getting less Christmassy and more cringeworthy, (Which is a good thing to be fair as you were the musical equivalent of colonialism to an extent) and yet mosquito nets to this day still save more mosquitos from dying of aids than your aid does saving children dying of starvation. DAVID DRAIMAN, I hope your label and PR team leaves you dangling like your stupid fucking chin tusks, for personally signing missiles that’ll undoubtedly kill civilians you tactless cunt. Down with the sickness? You’re just down in everyone's estimations. U2 once hacked us to give us a free album on iTunes...hacked is a strong word, sorry...let me rephrase that; RAPED. U2 forced an album on us without consent, I guess that’s how The Edge gets off? I digress... 

Jokes aside, today we’re here to appreciate and learn about YUNGBLUD. Real name Dominic, Yungblud has never shied away from controversy or criticism, be it in his early image and fashion sense on stage, or the sheer honesty of his song writing, to even starting up his own festival to ease the chokehold on extortionate organizers, and, from his emergence on “21st Century Liability”, this Yorkshire-born youngster has grown into one of the most vitally important artists in rock and alternative music. He champions the people, he’s an empath, he cares about community...he cares A LOT, and not many so unashamedly put the people first. 2025 found Yungblud scoring another number one album with “Idols” ...and before we jump into this headfirst, BILLY IDOL once said “Rock isn’t art, it’s the way ordinary people talk”, so let’s talk... 

The opening track “Hello Heaven, Hello” is a beautifully ballsy move at just over nine minutes long. There's no short, sharp introduction to this album, we dive straight into the grandiose with an ambitious indie-rock opera, and you know immediately this is going to be something different, something special. It’s a journey of self-discovery, and he’s asking if you’re along for the ride. It’s a track about finding your truth, your identity and the tribulations you persevere through; the ambitions you nurture and the goals you aspire to in the face of negativity and adversity. Amidst an up-beat indie rock core sound we have wonderfully arranged orchestral pieces, hard rock riffs, vocal vitriol and a true longing for life. We take elements of QUEEN, “The Rocky Horror Picture Show”, BLACK SABBATH, OASIS, THE VERVE...it’s truly a modern rock masterpiece. Yungblud proves you don’t have to play heavy to go hard, as the emotions and eccentricities here are raw and real. This is a superb song... 

This transitions wonderfully into “Idols Pt.1” and there are almost James Bond elements here with the string instrumentation. We’ve got another track about diversity and emancipation. Girls and boys are irrelevant here; a gender-fluid ideology of who you really are at heart, and who you aspire to be...it’s a pained track about acceptance and empowerment. We can be our own idols; we can look into ourselves to find strength and belief and we shouldn’t let other people suffocate our dreams. Everyday people, believing in themselves and it's a sweet little melodic indie-pop number. 

This then blends wonderfully into the single “Lovesick Lullaby” and the Brit-Pop elements really shine through here. It gives off BLUR “Park Life” vibes with it’s almost narrated verses and light guitar notes, coupled with the simplistic, melodic chorus hooks. The switch between electric and acoustic guitars, the backing gang vocals; it all amounts to this brief but brilliant little track full of character, tackling self-doubt and insecurity. It’s like Dom is having fun with his own vulnerability and personality and acknowledging stifled yet tumultuous emotional dilemmas.  

We go straight into the sombre next as we have one of the most emotionally hard-hitting tracks you’ll hear this year, or ever, courtesy of “Zombie”. A truly heart wrenching track about coming to terms with loss, protecting your loved ones from hurt, mental health, and knowing time is precious. It’s about loving unconditionally in the face of hardship and truly knowing that there are people out there that care. There’s a genuine sense of sadness oozing from the guitars here that tearfully carry Yungblud’s tender vocal delivery and it’s a genuinely beautiful ballad; easily an album highlight. 

Similar can be said for personal album highlight of mine “Monday Murder”, which carries this jovial, melodious acoustic led guitar tone. It’s light, airy and houses an almost blissful ignorance to the chaos of the world, an apathy to the conflict. It’s touching in its melancholy to the point it acts as a prayer for healing, and a yearning for change. We could go on further about the enormity of the emotional aspects of this album, with simply stunning tracks like “Ghosts” and “War” too, but we’d be here all day. Go and appreciate the album for yourself, not just take my word for it. 

YUNGBLUD here has delivered not just a number one album, with some attention-grabbing singles like a pop star, with a cool image...he doesn’t ACT cool, that’s just Dom. He’s delivered an album so raw in genuine emotion, so real and relatable in lyricism, so undiluted in its undeniable passion for growth and togetherness, he’s cemented himself as a Bonafide 21st century rock star.  

His aura, his honesty, his dedication, his presence, his charm, his down-to-Earth character...he is legitimately the modern-day rock star the genre and the community NEEDS. “Idols” speaks to every single one of us; we have an idol locked away in all of us, our best self, be it emotionally guarded by walls from trauma, or a lack of confidence, or doubt...this album is a rallying cry for everyone of us to live. Truly LIVE. In just a few short years, his attitude and passion for not just performing, but the people, has seen Yungblud go from a 21st century liability, to absolutely essential listening. [10] 

As I’ve stated plenty of times before, back in the early 2000’s, we were in the height of the Nu-Metal era. All of the freshest bands were peddling in down tuned guitars; combining elements of alternative rock and metal, with rap and hip-hop, and traces of the tail end of grunge, and while the likes of LIMP BIZKIT and LINKIN PARK were riding high with chart success and platinum albums, there was always going to be a place, for good old-fashioned rock ‘n’ roll. It’s at the very core of what we enjoy under many guises today, as rock ‘n’ roll will never truly die. By that I mean, it’s like CARRY ON films, they’re dated as fuck but, they’re fondly remembered for what they were. Nowadays we have an ever so slightly over-saturated market for modern classic rock bands but, that’s a whole different kettle of fish, and we aren’t talking about when rivers meet in the kitchen... 

Today, we celebrate another anniversary, as twenty years ago, Suffolk based spandex enthusiasts THE DARKNESS unleashed their debut album; “Permission To Land”. Permission was granted too, as they spent four weeks holding onto the coveted UK No.1 Album spot in the official charts, selling over a million copies, fending off the likes of IRON MAIDEN and DAVID BOWIE. It won them Brit Awards and made them rock ‘n’ rolls newest stars. Now, in 2023, let’s look back and shine another light on The Darkness, as we check out their new four-disk anniversary set and grant them “Permission To Land...Again”. 

Disk one kicks off with the original album plus a couple of demos, and we’re greeted with a little folklore a la “Black Shuck”. An East Anglian death omen, a devil dog of sorts, it supposedly terrorised church folk, but here it’s all very tongue-in-cheek. We’re treated to some ascending riff and drum work, very bluesy and gritty, before we’re met with front-man Justin Hawkins, and his unique and impressively high vocal range. He jovially sings of how this demon dog don’t give a fuck, as they swagger through a high energy hard rock number, with wailing guitars and a simplistic AC/DC-esque intensity. It’s a fun opener and caught many by surprise. 

Next up we have our first solid album highlight, by the brief bombardment of lead single “Get Your Hands Off My Woman”. The rolling intro of gradually built bass and cymbals, leading into a flurry of intense glam rock, with some insanely high-pitched vocal screeches. It’s got light punk rock qualities in its attitude and fuzzy production, coupled with the frenetic solo, but it’s an undeniably entertaining piece of rock. This certainly caught people's attention in the February of 2003.  

To say the album was top heavy, would be a fair assessment, as the following three tracks were also singles, and they certainly wanted to make an impression. “Growing On Me” is a twisted tale of relationship uncertainty; jumbled emotions and confusion, treating love almost like a fungus. Who’s really growing on who? Justin here is incredibly juxtaposed in what he wants, or feels, but there is definitely something there. Dan Hawkins is once again allowed to let rip on a guitar solo and this is just a band in full swing. 

Speaking of full swing, we have the bands piece de resistance... “I Believe In A Thing Called Love”. A 21st century anthem, it’s undeniably their biggest song, and the track that put them on the map. From the music video battling space aliens, to the catchy, sing-along harmonies where EVERYONE tried to reach those high notes and failed miserably. It’s got clap-along qualities and riffs not seen since the likes of QUEEN and it’s just splendid. Arguably overplayed at rock clubs and alternative DJ nights, but it’s still a fantastic, light-hearted rock number. 

The albums strongest track though, debatably, is “Love Is Only A Feeling”. The gentle nature of this sweet, emotive rock ballad is simply stunning. The guitars and overall tone ooze a mature sense of longing and heartache, and the Spanish guitars, with subtle keys merely add a level of romanticism. And that solo too! This is played with passion and a sense of honesty rarely found in rock bands. This is from the heart and it’s wonderful. 

The remaining half of the album is fine, but as previously stated it has been front-loaded. “Friday Night” has some jovial lyrics about ping-pong, badminton and gymnastics, it’s a quirky song about being nerds at school, but meeting at a dance hall and reconnecting. It’s sweet in its delivery but emphasises naïve, youthful romance. It’s like, “Friday I’m Love” by THE CURE in a catsuit and far less Goth. “Holding My Own” closes the album with another ballad, and as touching as it is, can’t compete with our previous efforts. 

The demos consist of unreleased tracks like “Out Of My Hands” and “Nothings Gonna Stop Us”, which are fine ballads and energetic numbers respectively, while “Black Shuck” gets the Vincent Price homage with a creepy intro a la “Thriller”. “I Believe In A Thing Called Love” has the elements in place but it’s slower, with more synth underlay, and is a far cry from the finished song. A couple of tracks to check out but, the band picked all of the right singles to be fair. With the added production quality of course. I believe in a thing called studio engineering.  

The following review that you’re about to read, came about purely by chance, as, the band and album in question were not even on my radar, let alone my infinite list of shit to listen to. No, today’s review can be credited to Nikki Smash, who I write content for over at RIFF YARD MEDIA. Courtesy of ONE EYED TOAD RECORDS, SaN PR forwarded Nikki the upcoming debut album from Hertfordshire based metal outfit RAZE, entitled “Pyrography”, scheduled for release on July 28th, and he himself gave it the review for the RYM website. (Check that out here). 

So, you may be wondering where I come into it? Nikki has a brilliant mind and is a very smart dude when it comes to the music industry, but review writing isn’t something he does a great deal of, and so he asked me for my opinion on his review, because he felt he may have been a bit too harsh, or, blunt? You’re probably thinking, then why the fuck did he ask me of all people? Good question, but I read it over, and it was a very well put together, professionally critical piece of reviewing, that had no issues with its content whatsoever.  

He was worrying about nothing essentially. I always say if you genuinely think something, commit it to pen, no point in watering down integrity. This is where I then said, casually, it could have been worse, I could have reviewed it! We laughed, then it dawned on me that, I have a blog of my own, which brings us to the here and now. So, with that being said; if Nikki thought HE was being harsh, well, someone hold my beer damnit. New question; will this Raze to the occasion and impress me, or is this pyro going to go up like the Grenfell Tower; a poorly planned tragedy? Let’s find out... 

We open with “Maple”, but don’t expect bacon and pancakes, this ain’t no breakfast of champions. We get a deep, brooding guitar led opening with light cymbal's littering the background, before a more surging dose of melodic metal sweeps through, and it’s promising. The clean vocals have a very delicate baritone, before Louis Dunham takes off with a soaring chorus section. The ALTER BRIDGE and TREMONTI influences plain to see, and it's going well...before the growling. As it happens, the band threw LAMB OF GOD down as an influence too, so naturally the best thing to do is combine everything, and squeal like a rabid pig over parts of a generally decent song, ruining the ever-loving fuck out of it. It doesn’t fit, it does neither the track or Louis any favours, and is delivered with about as much grace as a coat hanger abortion.  

Follow up track “Better Off Alone” starts off harnessing more of a core heavy metal style, channelling further influences like MACHINE HEAD, but it also has an air of PANTERA to it in places. The heavier, guttural vocals do feel more at home here, as the instrumentation is more befitting of such a brutal approach; it isn’t jarring in any way, and the cleaner notes compliment the growls much better here. An admittedly sluggish, plodding riff carries the bulk of the track, and the guitar solo is sadly lost in a barrage of audible throat cancer, while drummer Ethan Morter smashes his plates like a bull in a China shop. Way overlayered here and it’s another potential highlight spoiled. 

Next up we have their most recent single “Roachman”, and this could be considered an album highlight. When they focus on clean melody, and incorporate their Southern-tinged hard rock, they actually have something decent going, as individually it is clear they are all incredibly competent performers and musicians, all of the potential is there, but there seems to be this need for everyone to be in the limelight, and these tracks at some point or another feel clustered and congested. Again, guttural vocals not necessary here, bringing the track down, and this one simply feels like two different tracks trying to work at once. Oh, and we HAVE to mention the video. Part live performance footage from their local town hall with all eleventeen people in attendance, part stop-motion claymation footage. Remember when CKY had that video for “Inhuman Creation Station” that was all stop-motion, that Bam directed? Yeah, this isn’t that. This is more like, Morph from “SMart”, but Mark Speight sculpted him AFTER he hung himself... 

The rest of the album finds itself in a bit of a pattern creatively. “C. Exigua” contains some quality guitar work and a pleasant solo, while “...Again” takes things too far, over-delivering on the fret-wankery, almost trying too hard. “Mellow Breeze” utilises some more crooned vocals for a slight change of pace but it’s quite anti-climactic, while “W.B.C.” again is very heavily layered in production. There is a lot going on here and we find another track blended in a messy, convoluted headache. Closing track “Blue Sky Vengeance” does have some enjoyable, funky bass lines that stand out because you can actually hear them here, but that’s about it for that. 

As stated, as musicians, these lads can very obviously play, and they are more than technically proficient. Yes, it’s their debut album, yes, they want all the bells and whistles and yes, they have the potential to deliver some genuinely strong material in the probably near future, but they need to rein it in a little and understand less can be more. A lot of the time they don’t allow each other room to breathe, and the result is an often time needlessly noisy album. “Pyrography” sounds like a combination of pyromania and pornography...which I guess they think is hot by some means of a burning passion? It’s more like gonorrhea if you ask me; treatable but best not to have it in the first place...[4] 

I’ve said it before but, when we think about alternative music in South Wales, we automatically go to Cardiff and the valleys feeding the capital, as let's be honest, we’ve been spoiled for choice. From Merthyr Tydfil and THE BLACKOUT, who have just recently reformed ahead of Download, (Their hometown comeback show sold out quicker than you can ask Sean Smith S’appenin? Purely ironically) to Blackwood and the MANIC STREET PREACHERS, down through Pontypridd and the LOSTPROPHETS. Granted that last one is a sheep so black not even the most woke Welshman would associate...but, I digress.  

However, what about Newport? TJ’s was often cited as one of the best live venues to ever exist in the UK, they’ve given us Diverse Vinyl, the UK’s largest source of new vinyl records, they’ve given us FEEDER, there’s a whole lot of gas left in SKINDRED’s helicopter, and, we can’t be forgetting those comedic rap terrorists GOLDIE LOOKIN’ CHAIN. It’s 2023 now; your mother could very well have that penis. Newport has been overlooked let’s be fair, and today’s band are hoping to grab some attention for Wales’ third largest city. Let me introduce you to CRISIS TALKS. 

The three-piece, consisting of vocalist David Lloyd Chapman, guitarist and peddle wizard Mark William Squire, and drummer James Clement are preparing to release their debut album; “Heavy The Heart”, on June 15th. David got in touch with me recently asking me to attend a launch show, at the Little Taphouse; Newport, but I was sadly double booked. The least I could do however, would be to agree to give the album a listen and a little write up. The question is, will I be having crisis talks with myself after listening to this album? Let’s find out... 
 
We open up with the track “Dancer”, but truth be told I’m not moving a muscle. OK that’s a little harsh. We’ve got a solid dose of classic, riff-rich hard rock, with some rather funk-laden bass and assertive percussion, leading this admittedly rhythmic track. Vocally here David is interesting as, he finds himself somewhere between Daron Malakian and Benjamin Kowalewicz tonally in places. It’s got a mellow transitional section which keeps things interesting, and ultimately, it’s a decent start. 

Follow up track “Dark Cold War” houses a far grittier, angst-riddled feel, with groove aplenty in the bluesy, hard rock instrumentation and off-kilter, semi-prog inspired delivery. Slicker in production too, despite the slightly stop-start approach vocally, and again we have another similarly placed mellow filler section dividing the track. That intro though, minimal but very effective; catchy simplicity. 

Sticking to the meatier offerings, we’ve got “Submission”, and we have some light and subtle 90’s grunge aesthetics at play, amidst a back-drop of almost tribal percussion, and some of the albums cleanest, melodic vocal displays. As it progresses, we again find them groove-rich in presentation, so credit to the trio for their consistency. “Undone” has a more vibrant, almost indie-inspired alt.rock vibe to it, and here, especially vocally, it reminds in parts of PLACEBO. This is certainly an album highlight. David, on purpose or not here, has this nasally twang that pays homage to Brian Molko in the sincerest way, it’s actually more entertaining than Placebo’s newest album. It wouldn’t sound out of place on “Sleeping With Ghosts” frankly. 

Speaking of spooks, “Ghosts” champions a far softer, acoustic approach from the three-piece initially, but does descend into flutters of more metallic fret-work, while “Monsters” takes that acoustic influence and channels the likes of JEFF BUCKLEY, which is praise indeed. Not as tortured poetically, not as vulnerable vocally, David isn’t quite that open book, but this is damn close. Finally, then we finish up on “Soundcheck”, and we’ve got ourselves a lovely, sombre guitar ballad, with emotive instrumentation and a legitimately moving guitar solo. 

When I walked into this album, I didn’t know what to expect. Without wanting to shit on my own doorstep, a lot of the more “local” artists that have come my way haven’t left me truly inspired. Take my recent PENNY RICH review for RIFF YARD MEDIA for example. But, while this album isn’t perfect per se, there’s plenty of character and style here to ensure these succeed live, there’s already that certain raw quality to these tracks, and they are bound to translate well in a live setting.  

The song-writing capability and conception is there artistically, I just think they need the chance to get out there more, and truly hone their sound, as there is a lot of potential in this trio. The only crisis talks need to be about growth, commitment and dedication, as these three could do well for themselves among the current wave of UK festival regulars. “Heavy The Heart” is an emotional, back to basics rock record with some good ideas and, the only fresher thing coming out of Newport right now, is the heroin. [6] 

It’s weird, right? We’re at the arse end of 2022, and Covid still crops up in the conversation regarding bands plans and ideas. Typically, you’d find that bands were a bit lost, because tours were cancelled, so they’d push some extra exclusive merch to compensate, or …they’d work on a cheeky EP to tide fans over, or even just jump straight into writing their next album. But oh no, not LORDI...

The Finnish Eurovision favourites decided fuck it; following 2020’s “Killection”, they weren’t going to get to work on the next album, or even a double-album, no, that’s too uninspired; unoriginal and quite frankly boring. The band decided to work on a concept BOX-SET, of SEVEN consecutive new and original albums,  between 2021-2022 under the banner of “Lordiversity”.  

A modern, retroactive time-capsule, it spans multiple genres, eras and sounds, spanning decades, covering the growth and evolution in fashionable rock ’n’ roll, but with that beastly, Lordi twist. The question is; can a bunch of pantomime shock rockers pull off such a feat? Let’s find out, as we plough through these 78 tracks, wishing they could have settled for an EP... 

The series starts off with “Skelectric Dinosaur” and we find ourselves back in the late 1970’s, where rock music was at that initial turning point. That transition between the more innocent, formative rock ‘n’ roll, swing and more blues influenced styles, to what we now refer to separately as classic rock.  It opens up with “SCG Minus 7: The Arrival” and with its church organs, haunting wails and children's giggles, telling you that “Monsters are coming” …it’s quite the creepy introduction. This however leads us into disappointment, as we’re greeted with first track proper; “Day Off Of The Devil”.  

Musically absolutely fine for the style they are going for, imagine, KANSAS, or, ALICE COOPER or even BLUE OYSTER CULT, they’ve nailed that classic guitar tone and recording quality, credit to them, and it’s a decent, chilled out rock track, however the intro promised something a lot more sinister. The question is, how DOES the devil spend his days off? Is he there with a bowl of Coco Pops, sat on the couch in his pyjamas watching Disney+ on a Saturday morning? Who knows.... who cares...not me.  

“Starsign Spitfire” has a very slow, plodding pace to it, while it does have some decent backing vocal harmonies elevating the chorus. “The Tragedy Of Annie Mae” has a very DEEP PURPLE-esque bass-line fuelling the track and it rumbles along nicely. We do eventually finish album one off with “...And Beyond The Isle Was Mary”, and we get a quaint, piano-filled piece with rainy sound effects, resulting in a gentle closing number.  They nailed the sound of the era and have delivered well here overall; it’s not a bad start. 

Next up we have the album “Superflytrap” and we transition rather quickly from the origins of rock and early metal, into the bright lights of the discotheque. The intro piece, “SCG Minus 6: Delightful Pop-Ins" is totes cringe babes, with the porn parody content. Some bimbo taking in the pizza guy, and the pool guy, like some seedy classic blue-movie plot-segue, until the monster breaks in and there’s screaming and terror, and it’s all a bit shit. I pray Asylum don’t read this; their movies are bad enough as it is... 

The actual opening tracks “Macho Freak” and “Believe Me” are a bit better. It’s not always easy to recreate that nostalgic disco/club vibe musically with it coming out authentic, but credit to a band like Lordi, they’ve managed it. The funk-fuelled synths, alongside the twangy guitars, in this day and age remind me of DEREK BISHOP if you’re interested in modern disco, and to be fair, the band, despite their appearance, don’t sound cheesy doing this. “Bella From Hell” capitalises on some genuinely soulful backing vocals, while “Cast Out From Heaven” tries to be a genuine ballad, and, let's be honest, the vocals do NOT suit this approach. This is too jarring.  

Where do we go from here?  Album number three; “The Masterbeast From The Moon”, and we enter prog-rock territory. Inspired by the likes of PINK FLOYD etc, it’s a more ambitious piece but do a band like Lordi have the ability to pull this off? Let’s get one thing straight here, no... the answer is no. “Moonbeast” utilises an almost GHOST-like character instrumentally but that’s genuinely as good as it gets. The praise ends here. “Hurricane Of The Slain” highlights this point as, the piano rich, orchestrally led strings of the track are gorgeous, but the clash with the gruff vocals absolutely ruins things. It’s all well and good trying new things musically, but when the vocals are so often stagnant, it has a detrimental effect on the entire project. “Church Of The Succubus” at over 11 minutes fits better in the whole prog-rock aesthetic, but even that can’t save this record.  

What do we have next? “Abusement Park”, and I can’t lie to you, I do love a play on words; this title tickles me. It reminds me of JOHNNY KNOXVILLE in the film “Action Point”, but I digress. The title track absolutely reeks of classic heavy metal with the pacing, the key transitions, the style of percussion, it’s got a semi-MOTORHEAD vibe to it as well as the likes of W.A.S.P., almost power-metal in places, and it’s very up-tempo and energetic. It can be a bit cheesy with some incredibly cliched names like “Ghost Train” and “Rollercoaster”, but it’s to be expected. “Carousel” has some wonderfully emotive, smooth, sensual guitar playing that reek of the 80’s, while “Pinball Machine” harbours this strong AC/DC, or, JUDAS PRIEST level of vocal screeching.  

“Nasty, Wild & Naughty” harbours all of that overdone rock ’n’ roll sleaze lyrically, despite being a catchy piece of rock with all of the cowbell, before “Merry Blah Blah Blah” comes out of the blue as a Christmas single. The bells and choirs are there, the Santa references are there... but do you know what is also there? Me, making Ebeneezer Scrooge feel uncomfortable with my lack of festive spirit. Pull a cracker, the joke will be this song, I promise. I mean, WHY?! 

Next up we have “Humanimals” and we’ve reached our more, BON JOVI and AOR inspired tracks, and it shows. Opening track proper “Borderline” has a real, I guess, bon-jovial vibe to it (I’m sorry) with its light, up-beat synths and almost hushed percussion. The chorus houses some smoother gang vocals and its honestly quite the pleasant little track instrumentally. “Victims Of The Romance” utilises a more guitar driven approach in comparison but it reeks of that, all-too parodied hair-metal era. If you choose to picture Lordi with mullets in spandex, well, that challenging wank is on YOU my friend. “The Bullet Bites Back” stands out with its genuinely sleek guitar tones, and especially it’s solo, before we revisit “Like A Bee To The Honey”. A decent piece (Written by KISS) but, two years old, and practically becoming filler at this point.  

Our penultimate album, “Abracadaver” leans further into the emergence of what we now fondly refer to as modern metal, with that transitional period, from the mid to late 1980’s into the 1990’s. Ignoring the now tedious intro bit, we dive into “Devilium”, and we’re met with a bombardment of riffs, old-school thrash metal aesthetics and vocals that could make onions cry. The title-track isn’t much better truth be told. You CAN hear “Big-4” elements but the track does eventually descend into utter fret-wankery. “Beast Of Both Worlds” is arguably as good as it gets on this one, with it’s very SLAYER-esque chugging riff-work and rhythmic snarls. Done well enough but, beyond dated. 

Finally, then, and oh how glad I am knowing this (Excited for this one? Hell no, I’m just glad this is over with), we round things up with “Spooky Sextravaganza Spectacular” and that name alone reeks of ROB ZOMBIE. “Demon Supreme” utilises darker synths and a semi-industrial aesthetic to give the ol' Dragula a right good rear ending. It’s a touch repetitive but it’s got an energy to it and reminds me of POWERMAN 5000 in ways. “Lizzard Of Oz” houses more chugging riffs, with a strong electronic core sound, something which a more industrial metal unit might partake-in.  

“Skull And Bones (The Danger Zone)” repeats this seemingly Rob Zombie inspired instrumental direction, with it sounding aesthetically very similar. “Shake The Baby Silent” is top quality parenting advice it has to be said, Mr. Lordi collecting his dad of the year award over here, well done. Skip the bottle feed, jump straight to infanticide. It took seven albums but we do actually get our first actual stand-out highlight in the form of “Terror Extra-Terrestrial”. The intro spoils it a little bit, with its E.T parody segue, but we get a frankly quirky piece of synth-driven hard rock, and it’s honestly rather catchy. We ultimately finish up very ironically however, with the track “Anticlimax”...and I’m not even going to make any jokes here, the audio speaks for itself. After seven albums, completing this seventy-eight-track endurance test has to be rewarded in some aspect surely? Not in the slightest. 

Lordi tried something different here; they have to applauded for their creative ambition, that’s without question. What DOES need to be questioned though, is why the hell they couldn’t do seven concept EP’s instead of seven full bloody albums? They could have very easily cherry-picked specific highlights, and made a far more digestible, and more importantly, enjoyable listening experience. Seventy-eight tracks, allows for far, far too much filler, and truth be told, fodder. They managed to occasionally hit certain spots musically, and instrumentally to diversify these albums into their genre’s, which is the entire point OF “Lordiversity” as a concept, but vocally they just aren’t capable of really delivering; it’s very one-dimensional for the most part, and that grates over time.

In summary... Monstrous? Check. Mediocre? Also check. If concept albums are your thing, love anthologies and collecting box-sets, or simply are a die-hard Lordi fan, you'll likely enjoy this for what it is. If you specifically like a certain style or genre, feel free to sift through your own preferences accordingly, you MIGHT get something out of it, but, as a complete package, this is at a level of grandiosity Lordi really shouldn't be dabbling in. For me? This review is finally over...give me a hard rock hallelujah! [4]

SPEAKING OF THE ROAD...BILLY IDOL makes his return to the UK in 2022 for a live arena tour, his first since 2018! The original rebellious poster boy hits six dates across the UK with special support from THE GO-GO'S to promote his new EP, as well as treating audiences to a plethora of classic hits and favourites. Tickets are available right now, via www.aegpresents.co.uk/events/detail/billy-idol - and to clarify, the dates and venues are as follows;

Saturday June 11th - Glasgow, SSE Hydro
Monday June 13th - Manchester, AO Arena
Wednesday June 15th - Birmingham, Resorts World Arena
Saturday June 18th - London, SSE Arena Wembley
Sunday June 19th - Cardiff, Motorpoint Arena
​Tuesday June 21st - Leeds, First Direct Arena

We hope to see you all at the roadside next Summer...you'll find me at Cardiff.

It’s strange how certain things just stick with you as you grow up…for example, let’s say…North Carolina. Random, I know, like, I’ve never been there, I don’t have any family there, but embedded in my brain, is the fact that despite being born in Tennessee, Ric Flair comes from Charlotte, North Carolina (It’s a kayfabe thing). With that in mind, when a band slides into your email submissions stating that they too are from North Carolina, you instantly find yourself shouting “WOOOOO!” and knife-edge chopping everything in close proximity. (Excuse any following typo’s as I write this with a broken hand)

The band in question, are MIRROR POINT, who hail from Sanford and Cedar Creek, NC and consist of members Marc Killian, Travis Jones and Sketchy J. They recently got in touch with me asking me to check out their debut album “Shine On” which was released earlier this year through Mokovo Records. With an apparent variety of stylistic influences, let’s see if Mirror Point can mirror The Nature Boy, and be the limousine-ridin’, jet-flyin’, kiss stealin’, wheelin-dealin’ sons of  guns I personally hope they are.

​The mini-album opens up with “Winner Takes All” and we’re immediately met with some back-to-basics riffs and the typically clean yet, slightly bourbon coated vocals that make up your classic blues rock songbooks. It plods along really quite casually, quite middle of the road really before eventually picking up in intensity, exuding a more passionate instrumental display towards the tracks climax. It takes a minute or two to warm up but it gets there in the end. Not deserving of any winners medals, but it doesn’t come last either…it’s just taking part really. Next up we have a track called “PhenoBarbieDoll” and it’s one of their local radio successes. Another melodic, hard rocking blues-based number, it’s aimed at the trappings and troubles caused by social media; the anxiety it can give you trying to keep up appearances, the expectations of maintaining your plastic lifestyle, the fear of failure and the longing for fame. It’s quite a socially relevant track that has its points, but let’s not beat around the bush here the title is terrible. “PhenoBarbieDoll” sounds like a rip off, of a SyFy rip-off, of a straight to DVD Asylum rip-off of a low-budget “Annabelle” rip-off. We actually ran out of barrel to scrape…

​Looking further into some of their outside influences however, we get to another local radio success by the name of “Is This Was This”…I mean, if this WAS is and is was it wasn’t isn’t it? I thought so. A Latin/Hispanic fuelled little love song with clear yet subtle funk elements, and a certain Mediterranean flare, but plays on regrets, second guesses, absence an emotional confusion, touching upon PTSD, yet delivered in a predominantly light hearted manner. “Just Push Play” continues with the genre experimentation courtesy of a genuinely interesting combination of soulful 70’s funk, lounge jazz and modern hip-hop with a completely out of the blue rap-breakdown. The contrast manages to work without sounding jarring or like the world’s worst Nu Metal band, and that competition is TIGHT, so credit to them there.

The remainder of the record primarily consists of more, textbook blues-based hard rock which does have its moments of instrumental appeal, but sadly does become pretty generic over the course of the album, that IS only seven tracks long remember. Sure they dabbled in a few genres to spice things up but on a scale of black pepper to Bhut jolokia, that spice is toothpaste. Collectively, “Shine On” is harmless enough and you can appreciate it’s basic blues rock appeal, I mean they’re on the radio back home so they’re climbing that ladder, and there is an audience for blues based hard rock, I mean look at BLACK STONE CHERRY…it’s do-able, just on this instance, “Shine On” isn’t even as bright as one of Ric Flair’s bejewelled robes, let alone the 16-time world champion himself. To be the man, you gotta beat the man…Mirror Point have not beaten the man. Mirror Point are more like David Flair than Ric at this point. [5]

I get A LOT of emails, not as many as big publications obviously, but for me, I get a lot, and I literally can’t keep up with them all. This means I either take virtually forever getting around to some reviews, resulting in the peak promotion period usually having been and gone, for that I do apologise. Sometimes I forget about submissions entirely, for which I also apologise, and a lot of the time, I’m sent singles. Now, this blog has been running since 2014 and 99% of the content here, bar the odd rare article, is comprised of EP and album reviews. I’ve nothing against the humble single, I miss the days of picking up CD singles in Woolworths wondering what B-Sides you’d be treated to…but writing a full review for just A single is something I’ve always personally deemed a bit of a ball ache.

Going forward, I am going to try to, once a week (The key word being try here, I’m making no promises) present a general collection of single submissions from my inbox in one article, to try and ensure I don’t miss out on potential gems, and more importantly, to also clear some space in my inbox (At this time of writing I have around 650 unread emails…LOL). With that in mind, here are seven randomly selected tracks that I have been sent, that I would like to share with you, in the first GTGC Unlucky Dip; the result of combining Speed Dating with the heartfelt Comedy Roast.

We're going to kick this feature off with a 4-piece from London by the name of HEAVYMAN. Comprising of vocalist/guitarist Charlie Yang, drummer Tom Papaloizou (I'm pretty sure he was in "The League Of Gentlemen"?) bassist Igor Fonseca and lead guitarist Nick Burns, they recently got in touch, stating that were fans of the blog and were themselves fueled by alcohol and sarcasm, asking me to check out their debut single "Baby Jean". How could I possible refuse?

Initially sounding like something you'd hear from early TURBONEGRO, it soon transitions into a more methodical, groove-rich slow jam of a southern blues rock effort. It covers all the bases with some slick guitar work and vocal swagger for some textbook classic blues rock. With more tracks scheduled to be released over the coming months, these are ones to watch.

"Now this is a story all about how my life got, at most, mildly inconvenienced, but I'd like to take a minute just to share this my friend, and talk about this new single by The Fresh Prince Of Bellend".

You know all the meme's with "Now listen here you little shit..."? Well that's essentially me right now with RORY K. A native of downtown Manhattan, New York, Rory was born into a musical family, with his dad having been in the late 80's socio-political rock group BLACK 47. So imagine his dad's disappointment to see Rory here peddling some of the most uninspired, cringe-worthy rap/hip-hop an eleventeen-year-old would perform, on the track "Heat Thru Your Body"...I bet he finds vanilla spicy.

From the intro that sounds like seagulls having a stroke, to the combination of abysmal lyrics and self-indulgent vocals...and the embarrassing video, it's just...no. The bit where Rory is, (I'll use this term loosely) "performing" in front of some street graffiti, why are you holding a mic? You look like an absolute tit mate. And you emailed me three times for this? Assuming I hadn't replied because I couldn't stop dancing to the track? I would sooner invite my enemies to dance upon my grave than dance to this myself. And it's through*...for the record. I'm beginning to regret this new feature already...

I honestly don't know why I get sent this stuff...I'm not against rap and however many hip-hop subcultures there actually are, but it is SO rare I find any that I genuinely like. I can appreciate a flow, or a beat, sure, but there is too much recycled rap out there full of cliches about money, bitches, drugs and ho's and quite frankly I don't care about any of it.

"Twerk It Out" is the new track from Cleveland Ohio based hio-hop veteran DEEJAY CENTIPEDE, who has been spinning records since the 80's, and it features Sonny Vajra and Tee Hova...which...means absolutely nothing to me. It's got a certain 90's vibe going on which I guess you could describe as "fresh", with some soft synths poorly underlying some genuinely irritating clapping percussion. A lot of autotune going on in the vocals, and I can't lie, outside of this blog, I wouldn't listen to this...I'd rather be in the middle of a Human Centipede truth be told, but that's just me. As of now I'm outlawing Twerking on GTGC. 

Austrian psychedelic rock trio MOTHER'S CAKE (Consisting of lead vocalist/guitarist Yves Krismer, bassist Benedikt Trenkwalder and drummer/backing vocalist Jan Haussels) are set to release their new album sometime in the Autumn of 2020, and tease interesting things to come with their latest single "Toxic Brother".

The onslaught of fuzzy guitars and echoed vocals, delivered among a frenetic, up-tempo barrage of stoner sludge-punk is as fun as it is exciting; the energy is real here and it'll easily appeal to fans of say, EXIT_INTERNATIONAL. The gradual fade-out of the track counters the increasing levels of insanity as you can hear the mental breakdown as it happens...this is a solid track.

Returning to the UK now and more specifically; Hull, and we have a four-piece hardcore punk outfit by the name of SMILING ASSASSIN. Consisting of vocalist George Garnett, drummer Robbie Johnson, guitarist Josh Rogerson and bassist Casey Stead, they were forwarded to me by the wonderful folk over at Rage PR.

The new socio-political single "National Pride" is taken off the forthcoming album "Plight Of The Millennial" which is penciled for release on May 31st, and it combines all the vitriolic aggression of hardcore punk with the instrumental impatience of trash metal, easily taking influence from the likes of THE EXPLOITED or MUNICIPAL WASTE. It's an intense listen and suggests that the new album is going to be an absolute scorcher.

Now I'll start off by saying this...on initial listen, it's not as annoying as "Despacito"...but I'm not ruling it out overtime. It's another one of this Latino-inspired R'n'B/rap offerings that's meant to sound all smooth and sexy in the club, but I'd rather just sit in the corner with a warm bottle of Bacardi squeezing fresh lime directly into my eyeballs. 

L.D.N's contribution is fine and his rapping isn't bad, probably the most enjoyable aspect of this track in all fairness, but that doesn't really say much. Also, Mi Carino means My Sweety...creepy much. Your Nan singing this is she mate? Bomboclaat don't say shit like sweety fam ya get me? Real talk blud. I just lost the plot, literally watched it run off...

We round off this selection of tracks by coming full circle back to London, to find CALLING ALL ASTRONAUTS an their newest single "Welcome To The Black Bloc". The trio (Consisting of vocalist/programmer David B, guitarist JJ and bassist Paul "Buzzsaw McCrudden) mix elements of punk rock attitude and an electronic, almost light industrial tone for their sound, bridging the likes of PITCHSHIFTER, MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE and MINISTRY for a no-nonsense blast of socio-political neo-dystopian noise.

The single is officially released on May 29th, with the new album, entitled "#Resist" dropping shortly after on June 5th, via Supersonic Media which I'm sure is going to an incredibly charged listen.

Now, I’m sure you’ve all heard the tales about us Welsh…stories about non-licet liaisons with animals of a woollen nature (For the record, Velcro gloves work wonders, though you didn’t hear that from me) but it’s not ALL about sheep shagging, let me tell you! Yes aside from our preferred bestial pastimes we do occasionally dabble in a spot of rock ‘n’ roll and as I’ve stated before, South Wales is a hotbed of up-and-coming bands and musicians. Now while a lot of attention is heaped on the Cardiff area because of its bustling live venues, we can’t forget about the rest of Wales, and today we’re taking a little trip up the valleys to a town called Aberdare for our next band; HEAVY FLAMES.

Comprising of vocalist David Hill, guitarists Lee Harvey and Ryan Lewis, bassist Gareth Owen and drummer Richard Boggis, the outfit are all about the old-school; opting to ignore what’s happening in the world of modern music, to play in their preferred style of classic blues-inspired rock ‘n’ roll…and they’ve showcased this on their debut full length album; “Bolt On The Rust”. The question is does this pile of rust belong on the scrapheap?

The album opens up with “Clearly Not A Welcome Rain” and it utilises the gradual build really quite well…we’re subject to a simplistic looped guitar sequence, blending in to some subtle percussion, as David wraps his vocals around proceedings before the track eventually erupts into a barrage of harmonica-fuelled rock. It’s bold as it is brash instrumentally, the southern blues tones giving this track some real swagger when it gets going and it’s an enjoyable start this.

The rock ‘n’ roll keeps on coming through album highlights such as “Nature Of The Beast” too…another initially low-key start but it quickly comes to life with some rich organ-eqsue synths akin to the likes of THE DOORS or even DEEP PURPLE in places; really embracing that early hard rock transitional period…not quite metal yet but the exploration into the weight and delivery of the instrumentation is all there. “Acre Of Graves” hammers this home brilliantly with its meatier riffs and almost polyrhythmic percussion, allowing for subtle prog aesthetics. The tone of the track here is a touch darker, incorporating more of a BLACK SABBATH vibe while still retaining their aforementioned synth-driven core sound and it’s a solid track.

There are a couple of lesser moments scattered around the album though, “Insult To The Brain” is more of an insult to my eardrums in all honesty, mainly because of that fucking guitar loop that makes your eye twitch. ‘Duh-duh-duh-duuuuuuh-duh’ it goes over, and over, and over, and over, and over…the chorus provides a brief respite, but it comes back and the repetition of this specific chord sequence just drives you mad. Maybe it’s just me but this makes me want to cause physical harm to the brain of whoever decided to record this particular track, not just insult it. “House Full Of Women” suffers from a similar problem although the riff here is quirkier and the track is generally grittier overall, salvaging it somewhat.

Generally speaking though those are minor irritants more than anything and don’t really take away from the album as a whole…the recording quality and sound that they’ve gone for clearly harks back to those classic days in the 70’s with the bluegrass-inspired tones, with the band managing to retain that certain rawness in their production. Younger fans of rock and metal may view this as old-fashioned or, maybe even uncool, but if you appreciate the nostalgia of those formative years in rock ‘n’ roll’s evolution then you’ll likely appreciate this a lot more. Not quite niche per se, but it certainly has more of a target audience in mind. [5]

People sometimes wonder what the difference is between irony and coincidence…well if you were run over in the street, and an ambulance just happened to be passing by, that would be a wonderful coincidence. Irony on the other hand, would be getting run over by the ambulance itself and, so long as nobody dies, is much funnier. Today’s review falls under the coincidental category for me personally…let me explain.

Back at the start of the month, I took a mini vacation down to the South English coast at Torquay for a couple of days, where, to be honest, I spent 80% of my time enjoying the sun and drinking. On the way there however I made a little stop at some place called Burnham-On-Sea…never heard of it before, but all I can tell you is that it was quiet…windy as all hell and the tide had gone out for what seemed like MILES. I honestly thought Godzilla had mistaken the place for Hawaii and was about to stroll up the beach causing another tsunami it had gone that far out. Anyway my time there was fleeting and I thought nothing else of it. Today however, I decided to take a dip into my email submissions and low and behold, the first EPK I click on happens to be from a band from Burnham On-Sea! Let me introduce you to SOME VILLAINS.

The four-piece (Consisting of vocalist/guitarist Edward Graves, guitarist Luke Tozer, drummer Stu Donavan and bassist Jake Beckett) have been on the scene since their 2014 single “Loose Generation”, and with their love of everything between classic rock ‘n’ roll, indie and prog, they’ve established themselves as a group of interesting and intelligent musicians. Their 2016 EP “Lizard Teeth” highlighted their admiration of experimental prog-rock and shoegaze, with predominantly longer tracks and the influence of RADIOHEAD and SMASHING PUMPKINS shining through…but here now in 2019, they’ve stripped things back a little and focused more on a grittier rock ‘n’ roll sound for their latest EP “Outliers”. The lads asked me to check it out, and seeing as I visited their home town it would be rude not to sample some of their wares!

The EP opens up with “Masters Sun” and it really doesn’t take long at all to get into the meat and potatoes of this record…we start off with some simple alternating chords, before the track lets rip with some ballsy, hard-rock riffage. The bass is deep and rumbling almost to the point where it’s sludge inspired, but we’ve got a rich groove, and vocally here Graves’ is rather hushed and subdued. Their love for QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE shines through here given the stoner / desert rock tones, coupled with an energetic up-tempo chorus; this is simply a great rock track. EP highlight “Burn Me Down” follows up and we’re initially met some almost WOLFMOTHER-esque instrumentation; combining classic rock and indie tones…the guitar is slick and frankly gallops along excitedly. The prog influences filter through vocally as Graves’ sings in an almost polyrhythmic manner, but it’s the convivial guitar tone that makes this track; it’s just fun.

“The Skin” again maintains an up-tempo vibe albeit somewhat darker in tone, bordering on atmospheric, with more hushed vocals, slightly raspy sounding in places reminding of JULY TALK to some degree, but we’re treated to a strong solo that certainly stands out as the tracks major talking point, before closing effort “Ghosts In The Field” incorporates a more shoegaze aesthetic alongside some again, darkly tinged indie rock…the type of sound that would appeal to fans of INTERPOL and the like. All in all though, there’s nothing truly negative to say about this EP whatsoever quite frankly. While the band are clearly better when they let their hair down and get gritty when it comes to the rock ‘n’ roll, the mellower tones do naturally compliment Graves’ vocal approach. There’s no  bells and whistles here, they’re a band and they keep it simple…having stripped back to a more classic rocking approach, and by cutting the track length from their previous EP ever so slightly, they come across as more polished and clinical in terms of their presentation. Not knocking the more prog-based sound of their previous work, but this does sound like an improvement. Some Villains by name but to fair lads you’re not sounding half bad at all. [8]

So I’ve got this confession to make…no I’m not coming out as a heterosexual white male that uses an online platform to give a personal opinion why; that would be career suicide! I jest…my confession is with regards to my approach to music. Sure, whether it’s here or for other publications, my reviews are always from an open-minded, honest perspective, trying to take into account more than just my own personal preferences for whichever artist I may be dealing with…but it doesn’t stop me having those personal preferences. For instance, I’ll go on record now for saying that, in my opinion, NIRVANA are a pile of shit…many would disagree, Courtney Love might try to set me up on a date with a Remington Model-11 for saying such a thing, but while I CAN admit they are an incredibly important and influential band in the evolution of alternative music…I just don’t like them.

This brings me to today’s band; BUCKCHERRY. The Californian rockers have been going for quite some time now and, I first heard of them back in 2001 when I discovered a track called “Slammin’”. It was a great, rock ‘n’ roll track and even though I was more concerned about Nu Metal at the time, I still enjoyed it for what it was. Fast forward a couple of years however, and I’m reintroduced to Buckcherry, as we come to arguably one of the worst successful rock songs ever recorded; “Crazy Bitch”. Seriously this song is 100% cringe in every conceivable way…everyone gives NICKELBACK a hard time when this fucking song exists, what are we doing like?! It’s AWFUL. Anyway needless to say, I was put off Buckcherry…I can’t be dealing with that, nope, no Sir, no thank you. BUT, in the interest of equality (And the fact that you chose them on my last readers choice poll you evil bunch of bastards) I’m going to give them another chance…earlier this year they released album number eight; “Warpaint”, and I’m on the front line prepared to do battle…come at me brah!

The album opens up with the title track and to be perfectly honest; it’s really not bad. It keeps things nice and simple to be fair, incorporating blues-based hard rock with a southern groove and some sleek guitar licks. The solo blends in well allowing the track to flow really smoothly without sounding jarring, it’s not been thrown in the mix ‘just because’ like some solo’s, actually adding to the track, and Josh Todd’s vocals while still distinct, are a touch subdued here, giving off a mellower vibe. It’s actually a decent little opener. If you do prefer mellow, “Right Now” initially has you covered as it continues with the light blues rock inspired guitar tone but strips back to a more acoustic-based delivery, although the chorus is far livelier and, remember what I said about solo’s? Yep…this one came out of nowhere quicker than you can say Randy Orton, and the song can’t seem to decide what it wants to be.

Let’s try and remain objectively positive though shall we and look at the highlights…”No Regrets” is a quirky little up-beat punk-rock inspired piece; it’s fun, it’s light-hearted and you can’t not enjoy this…from the clap-along segments, the tinny, rockabilly guitar stylistics and general skater-rock vibe, it’s just a happy track and at under 3-minutes, it’s an easy highlight. Closing track “The Devil’s In The Details” remains up-beat but returns to a more straightforward hard rocking / classic rock ‘n’ roll aesthetic with a fine riff carrying the track. “The Vacuum” raises a chuckle from me to be honest as in a funny twist of irony, it doesn’t completely suck. The riffs are solid and there’s an enjoyable melody layered throughout the track, resulting in quite an emotive listen, especially with Josh again holding back vocally, but the real highlight and frankly surprising inclusion here is a cover of NINE INCH NAILS classic “Head Like A Hole”.  Granted it’s not the same seething, industrial behemoth crafted by the vitriolic Trent Reznor, but the bass-heavy riffs still sound powerful here and it’s a great choice of cover; it’s a quality track to be fair and it’s done justice.  Is it as good as MILEY CYRUS’ cover on Black Mirror though?  I’ll let you reach your own conclusions there…

The rest of the album simply plods along really quite anonymously to be perfectly honest. “Radio Song” is a clichéd little acoustic piece with rich string-sections clearly aimed at finding commercial airplay while being both incredibly self-aware and  taking a subtle swipe at the mainstream, while “The Alarm” isn’t going to be waking anyone up in a hurry. Its’ slow pace and generally lethargic instrumentation makes for a predominantly boring listen, while Josh’s vocals come across as too much for the pace of the track at times, he’s shouting over it almost and it’s a bit off. Overall though I have to admit, it’s not a terrible album, not by any means…”Crazy Bitch” was quite a while ago now and I can’t hold on to these grudges forever, and while I do still hate that song with a burning passion, this album is fine, they seemed to have calmed down a bit, which I’m all for. I mean, just think, Josh Todd could have done something ridiculous like, release a god-awful, embarrassing rap-rock/dub album, undoing any and all regained credibility I’ve just found in the band, couldn’t he! Wait…what? Who are SPRAYGUN WAR? Oh for fuck’s sake…[6]